Deja Vu: Whats the story?

Flushdraw · 20-11-2007 2:07am

Ok not mad about saying this but because a lot of people on here know me but its a topic that i havent seen up on these boards and have a different slant on it. This is a long story and a very personal experience of how deja-vu has affecting my life so read it if you're interested or just skip it if you're not interesting in a long yarn.

Years ago when i was a teenager, i had a spell of experimenting and trying out aerosals and petrol and that was all part of the joys and peer pressure of growing up in a good oul north dublin suburb. I remember 1 day going too far on the inhaling and i blacked out. While blacked out i had the most fcuked up experience of my life and i thought i actually died. I came around in such a panic and didnt know what was going on. That was the end of that episode.

So 16 or 17 and i'm still having the odd joint here and there and trying out acid/lsd. Fine for a couple of years and never really moved onto anything heavier but one night it was different. I was 18 at the time and after doing acid with a couple of friends and walked the girlfriends home Coming back through the melting snow was the best buzz ever as was talking to a bloke that we were convinced was Orvil the duck!

Headed into the house and next i know i'm eating custard cream biscuits and buzzing off myself in the mirror (dont ask why). Something just snapped inside me and i fell into what i can only describe as a maze of deja-vu. I didnt know what to do or say and i was scared ****less. I ran downstairs and tried to speak but i couldnt talk. I was getting 2-3 deja-vus a second and by the time i thought what i was going to say, another 10-12 thoughts were going through my head and i was incoherent. An ambulance was called and i was shipped into the hospital. I was told i was speaking a different language in the ambulance but i was so caught up in the maze i didnt know what to do or what i was saying. I just couldnt focus on a thought long enough to speak.

Everytime i closed my eyes, i could see lots of colours. Each olour was a little smiley face coming towards me laughing at me, similar to what i experieced when i blacked out from buzzing on petrol a couple of years before. Anyway the hospital couldnt do anything and i had to sit there and get through it. It lasted 8 hours of continuous deja-vus before i snapped out of it.

The next few days were horrible. I was terrified it would come back. All went weel for about 3 months and then i decided that it wont do me any harm to smoke a few joints. couple of nights later, i was out in my shed with a few mates and girlfriends and out of the blue, i got a deja vu. It didnt go away and then i realised what was happening. I was re-living the exact same experience over again, each deja-vu coming along in the same order as the last time. They were coming so quick, that i knew what was coming next but couldnt control it.

This time, my parents had no sympathy for me but when they realised how panicked i was and the seriousness of it, they consoled me and helped me through it. I sat through another 5 hours of deja-vus before coming out of the maze. I stopped smoking, havent touched another drug, smoked another joint and even gave up drinkin for 18 months because any buzz, brings back signs. That was 12 years ago.

I constantly get flashbacks and panic attacks still now and have to fight through them. Barely a day goes past where i dont have to fight off deja-va. If i can think of something that i know didnt happen last time, i can usually get it to stop if i catch it early. Sometimes when i'm talking to people and it hits me, i just go into a different world and the panic is easy to see but its something i guess i got to live with for the rest of my life.

Sometimes when i start thinking, i think i'm still in it and segments of my life are just one big deja-vu and its just binding its time before it swallows me up and i end up in the looney bin but its a strong possiblility. Its one of the reasons i dont drive because i'm terrified it will happen when i'm behind the wheel. Wasnt easy writing this and i got some funny feelings going through my mind while i was wrting this. the mind/brain is such a powerful thing and i advice people not to fcuk with it. I wouldnt wish what i go through on my worst enemy.

12 monkeys ftw :rolleyes:

Muff_Daddy · 20-11-2007 2:07am

Rabies wrote: »

I had a serious bout of Deja Vu in college today. It was crystal clear, my head was spinning for about 10 minutes.

It got me thinking, why does it happen? how does it happen? I've never actually been able to get my head around where it comes from. Is it flashbacks from previous lives deep in our sub-conscience?

My head is probably still wrecked from the episode today, so apologies in advance if you think i'm talking sh1te.

I clicked this post and I was wondering what happened my profile! Then I saw my thread further down the page.

I need to lie down now.

EDIT: Merged.

BTW Flushdraw, fair play to you for posting that. I can't even begin to imagine what you must have been going through. Hope everything goes well for you in the future

wil · 20-11-2007 2:12am

What happens if you combine it with clairvoyance. Do you get the feeling you are going to have the feeling you felt something before?

Jesus Wept · 20-11-2007 2:20am

Good jaybus.

Thanks for sharing Flushdraw.

Ace2007 · 20-11-2007 2:40am

The-Rigger wrote: »

Thanks for sharing Flushdraw.

wow wasn't expectin that tony...
very interestin...

Flushdraw · 20-11-2007 2:45am

It was horrible and still is tbh but its also a blessing in disguise (a very dark, dirty, kick in the bollix disguise!) but i never went as far as to try heroin or anything stronger. A lot of mates did and some are dead, and some are locked up so i'm grateful for that much..Every cloud and all that....

So next time we're playing poker and it looks like i've seen a ghost, or i just jump up from the table, you'll know its not because i have Aces haha!

Ace2007 · 20-11-2007 2:47am

Flushdraw wrote: »

....

So next time we're playing poker and it looks like i've seen a ghost, or i just jump up from the table, you'll know its not because i have Aces haha!

ha don't try and pull that one on me - i know who u are, o btw unlucky in waterford... u seemed to be going well.

arybvtcw0eolkf · 20-11-2007 9:47am

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

It happens to me a lot. I just think it's because the situation is quite similar to a situation you have been in before but you may not remember it well.

And thats exactly what it is.

Its situations so similar that you don't remember the smaller details.

It happens more to older people because of this.