Fake Condoms

digitally-yours

Just read this and i thought i should post here it might save people going to PI forum

Fake condoms flood capital

Hackney Council were alerted to the problem last month when one amorous member of the public noticed the condoms he had bought were "not quite right" and reported the incident.

The condoms are in realistic packaging, but they are said to be "lacking in lubrication once opened". Brands which have been copied are Durex Extra Safe, Arouser, Ribbed, Performa, Gossamer, Select, and Fetherlite

"If any of the following codes appear on packaging, it is highly likely that these are not genuine Durex condoms and we advise consumers not to use them, as we cannot be sure of their safety."

Consumers with any queries are being advised to contact the Durex Careline on 0800 338 739 or Hackney Trading Standards on 020 8356 4929.

Rogue batches:
Durex Extra Safe - serial numbers 20604354
Arouser - 20906043
Ribbed - 20905271/ 20904142/ 2991118
Performa - TGL 4142
Gossamer - 21405074
Select - P4379
Fetherlite - 21405074

You might have used one .

Link here

Please Mods feel free to move if needed

_blank_

Condoms?

Pfft.

Crisp packets ftw.

super_furry

DesF wrote: »

Condoms?

Pfft.

Crisp packets ftw.

Only if their salt and vinegar. The salt kills dem jerms!

_blank_

:eek::eek:

The salt on the helmet is a bit sting-ey though.

Cheese Nunion, or Prawn Coctail tbh.

At least with the Prawn Coctail, you get a genuine smell too.

Ghost Train

I thought mars bar wrappers were the recommended alternative

neacy69

sure isn't this Catholic Ireland what would we doing with any kind of contraception....Quick run before the priest hears you mentioned the "C Word"

Hydroquinone

digitally-yours wrote: »

Fake condoms flood capital

Flood? Flood?
Good grief, who's been using them? Elephants? :eek::D

Spook_ie

Q.How d you know if elephants have been having sex in your garden......





A. They have been using the bin liners as condoms

Nevyn

What do you do when an elephant comes in through your window ?

Swim.

Colonel Sanders

just use a baloon with a bit of lubricant. Far cheaper......

eroo

some of the most beatiful,elegant and romantic posts i have ever seen

KTRIC

eroo wrote: »

some of the most beatiful,elegant and romantic posts i have ever seen

Well if you're aroused then I know where you can get some cheap condoms

AlmightyCushion

Who needs a condom? If she gets pregnant just stick an electric whisk up there and you're sorted.

whiskeyman

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Who needs a condom? If she gets pregnant just stick an electric whisk up there and you're sorted.

I dare ya to post this in a suitable PI thread...

Poxyshamrock

omg you don't how hard i laughed when i read that!

Mr. Presentable

DesF wrote: »

The salt on the helmet is a bit sting-ey though.

.

Dessie, Dessie, Dessie, you're using them inside out :eek:

KlondikePaddy

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Who needs a condom? If she gets pregnant just stick an electric whisk up there and you're sorted.

Thats a human life your talking about!!!!!! Respect please!

GrumPy

KlondikePaddy wrote: »

Thats a human life your talking about!!!!!! Respect please!

Twas a joke, maybe some people wouldn't find it funny (like yourself) But a harmless pop none the less.

(I hope it was a joke now AC)

KlondikePaddy

Irish GrumPy wrote: »

Twas a joke, maybe some people wouldn't find it funny (like yourself) But a harmless pop none the less.

(I hope it was a joke now AC)

No its no joke-its sick!!! Tell that to a mother who has had a miscarriage or couples who are trying to have kids!!!!
Its a blatant disrespect for human life!!!! Call a spade a spade!!!!!

Varkov

KlondikePaddy wrote: »

No its no joke-its sick!!!

Yeah, but it's still funny

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

o.0

something is seriously wrong with the world when I don't want to laugh at a thread on ah

some poor bastard's gona bet some poor bitch pregnant over this.

Hagar

KlondikePaddy wrote: »

Call a spade a spade!!!!!

Due to guidelines on racial epithets I'm afraid I can't do that.
It upsets the natives.

KlondikePaddy

Thats your inference not mine. Limited thought!!!! I pity you!!

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

!!!
!!!!!!
!!!!

!!!!!!!!!

CuLT

Mordeth wrote: »

!!!
!!!!!!
!!!!

!!!!!!!!!

??????????????
???????
??
???????????????? ???

KlondikePaddy

Proves my point! The future's bright there! Parents must be so proud!

Hydroquinone

Two things -
Putting an electric whisk up there wouldn't only kill any foetus, it'd probably kill the woman as well, she'd most likely bleed to death.
And any man on Boards who has the first idea what an electric whisk actually is, isn't going to get within an ass's roar of any sort of a woman, anyway, so it's all a bit irrelevant.

Piste

CuLT wrote: »

??????????????
???????
??
???????????????? ???[/QUOTE



PROFIT!!!

Nevyn

whiskeyman wrote: »

I dare ya to post this in a suitable PI thread...

:rolleyes:

the_syco

KlondikePaddy wrote: »

Call a spade a spade!!!!!

Call a spade, a spade, and call a joke, a joke. Or I start telling dead baby jokes:D

CuLT

KlondikePaddy wrote: »

Proves my point! The future's bright there! Parents must be so proud!

Thats your inference not mine. Limited thought!!!! I pity you!!

Varkov

Whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bin?

A dead baby in 10 bins.

On Topic : How much profit could there really be in counterfeit condoms?

eroo

lads,lay off the jokes ffs.you dont know who could be reading this thread,so keep it under raps.

Sir Digby Chicken Caesar

i know who's reading this thread,and I don't appreciate your insinuation that I don't.

wyndham

Hydroquinone wrote: »

Two things -
Putting an electric whisk up there wouldn't only kill any foetus, it'd probably kill the woman as well, she'd most likely bleed to death.

qft knitting needles ftw

Varkov

A good aul tumble down the stairs should do the trick.

Terry

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

Who needs a condom? If she gets pregnant just stick an electric whisk up there and you're sorted.

KlondikePaddy wrote: »

Thats a human life your talking about!!!!!! Respect please!

Careful now.

I'll get back to this in a bit.

KlondikePaddy

Terry-I don't appreciate the language used!!! I felt that it was right to respond to the insensitive language!!! Thanks for taking notice of this!!!

meglome

I was kinda hoping that they'd be chocolate or something

Hagar

I buy the fake condoms all the time, my fake girlfriend loves them.

Terry

KlondikePaddy wrote: »

Terry-I don't appreciate the language used!!! I felt that it was right to respond to the insensitive language!!! Thanks for taking notice of this!!!

That?

I was gonna post a South Park clip.
I just got distracted and forgot about it.

Nevyn

egg beater indeed.

really it is as if kids these days never heard of http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nancy_Spungen and her wire coat hanger.

Piste

Glass of whiskey and a hot bath and you're sorted!

Nevyn

The myth is gin not whiskey.

http://z.about.com/d/civilliberty/1/6/K/2/-/-/prochalk480x480.jpg

AlmightyCushion

Terry wrote: »

That?

I was gonna post a South Park clip.
I just got distracted and forgot about it.

Christopher Reeves wouldn't happen to be in that clip by any chance?

matt-dublin

KlondikePaddy wrote: »

No its no joke-its sick!!! Tell that to a mother who has had a miscarriage or couples who are trying to have kids!!!!
Its a blatant disrespect for human life!!!! Call a spade a spade!!!!!

troll go away!

does that mean that they'd burst easier? if so suiteable for water balloons?

cos durex don't always burst if you use them as water ballons, only the elite ones do, and you can't get them everywhere!!

Mellor

Thaedydal wrote: »

The myth is gin not whiskey.

http://z.about.com/d/civilliberty/1/6/K/2/-/-/prochalk480x480.jpg

the myth is gin,
whiskey actually does the trick

2 stroke

Before you use a condom, unroll it and check for the kite mark symbol.

Jesus Wept

eolhc wrote: »

I thought mars bar wrappers were the recommended alternative

ya wouldn't fit yore lad into a mars bar wrapper since they keep making them smaller and smaller.

matt-dublin

The-Rigger wrote: »

ya wouldn't fit yore lad into a mars bar wrapper since they keep making them smaller and smaller.

what his lad or the wrappers

ok where's my coat?

Suaimhneach

Who'd waste a condom as a water balloon!?

Also, AH.