The Funny Side of Religion

joseph brand

joseph brand

dmw07 wrote: »

Ah, that's magical.

The thread is readable again.

Thumbs up Jo.

I have just one poster on my ignore list and it's you-know-who. His/ her posts are like a Rubik's cube. They not read able easy to. :pac:

robindch

dead one wrote: »

You can continue if you wish.

We'll be continuing without you -- have a good week's holiday!

Sarky

joseph brand wrote: »

If you speed it up he looks like he's being possessed...

Bannasidhe

Penn wrote: »

WHOA WHOA WHOA! Dude, don't hide stuff like that under two pictures where it might not be seen. I almost thought it was just text from your signature.



That's just brilliant. Reminds me of a story Ricky Gervais told. Man goes into hospital with a tomato ketchup bottle stuck up his arse. Doctor asks how it happened. Man said he had gone shopping and when he arrived home, he couldn't find his house keys. So he put down the shopping, got a ladder and started climbing up the ladder to get in a first floor window which was open. Halfway up the ladder, his belt got caught on the ladder and broke, and his jeans and pants fell down. He fell off the ladder and landed on the ketchup bottle which was in his shopping bag.

Doctor asks "Why was there a condom on the ketchup bottle?"

Bizarrely - this is actually a true story.

But it was a matron at Homerton Hospital, Hackney not a doctor and it happened in 1986. I was fortunate enough to be in the pub later that night as she recounted the story of her day - the best part about it was that this particular matron was in her early 30s, had that Madonna 'Desperately Seeking Susan' look (the real Madonna not t'udder one) and a fabulous Maggie Smith type Scottish accent.

She congratulated her patient by saying 'ach, and didn't you no have grreat presence of mind not to mention gymnastic ability to manage to get a condom on to the ketchup bottle before it became inadverrrtently inserrrted in yourrr rrrectal passage. Well done you!'.

Delirium

Galvasean

dead one wrote: »

Hi Galvasean.
Let me contribute something for progress of this thread.
Newton said
"
For every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction."
For Fun the opposite reaction is, unfun, unhappy, woeful... Right, It's philosophy of life, which newton had explained.

So go post in an 'unfunny' thread then...

dead one wrote: »

Suffering and Pain awaits For You in this life. Remember the dead one when you'll suffer.

Such thinly veiled threats would have more impact if delivered more coherently.

joseph brand

RichieC

I love this, seems to be a breakout meme on reddit today.

Galvasean

I'm sure I've heard the quote before. Whose it by?

strobe

dmw07 wrote: »

It's a pity you didn't stay alive long enough to finish that English course. Reading your posts is so hard.

Can you not do a matrix style boot of Advanced English or something.

Neo could.

Ah that's not nice man. English isn't his first language, he's trying. I mean there is a wealth of material there with Dead One to take the piss out of without resorting to that.

==========

mikhail

Galvasean wrote: »

I'm sure I've heard the quote before. Whose it by?

The point of the meme is to post a photo of yourself with your own words, so while you may have read a similar sentiment, the quote is probably original.

joseph brand

Galvasean wrote: »

I'm sure I've heard the quote before. Whose it by?

You've seen the other quotes accompanied by famous faces? Well, these are personal quotes by real people.

Another example:



Dexter:

kleefarr

strobe wrote: »

Ah that's not nice man. English isn't his first language, he's trying. I mean there is a wealth of material there with Dead One to take the piss out of without resorting to that.

==========

I don't know who you're talking about, but when you see them please point them in the direction of my signature.
God would approve, if he could tell us, I'm sure.

legspin

strobe wrote: »

Ah that's not nice man. English isn't his first language, he's trying. I mean there is a wealth of material there with Dead One to take the piss out of without resorting to that.

To the letter of the law you are correct.
He does himself no favours with all that hateful bull**** he spouts and thus is is very difficult to have any sympathy for him. I do think some of it is an act though. He is well able to take offence even at stuff not aimed at him.

joseph brand

Bannasidhe

joseph brand wrote: »

RichieC

Worztron

RichieC wrote: »

Excellent quote. Here is another from RG "Ask yourself why you don't believe in all the other gods. Your answer, is why I don't believe in yours. This endeth the religious tweets."

Worztron

Bannasidhe wrote: »

All hail Baldrick.

joseph brand

Turtwig

Should they not be semicolons? Just saying . . .

Kivaro

Jernal wrote: »

Should they not be semicolons? Just saying . . .

You're going to Atheist hell because of that comment, as it is blasphemous to question the written word.

We need to believe that there was a reason why a comma was used and not a semicolon. Don't dare to question it;.':",

Delirium

.

Delirium

robindch

joseph brand

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vciwZjo3oXQ

joseph brand

joseph brand

fitz0

That 2 Kings 15:16 verse is pretty vicious.

Then Menahem smote Tiphsah, and all that were therein, and the coasts thereof from Tirzah: because they opened not to him, therefore he smote it; and all the women therein that were with child he ripped up.

So god is so loving he rips up pregnant women.

There is no context that can excuse this colossal piece of f*ckery.