Awkward conversation starters to avoid

Guest

Hello there fatso.

Guest

Hi, are you a man or a woman?

homah_7ft

Did you know the blogging fad is fading?

Guest

So then, still on the sex offenders register?

Black Swan

Did you shower today?

_Kaiser_

(to non-pregnant women) so.. whens it due?

Star Lord

Pull my finger!

Star Lord

Sh!t! You got a terrible beating with the ugly stick huh?

_Kaiser_

You were once a man, right?

Star Lord

Missus, your moustache is making me feel inadequate

The_Minister

Hi. The last time my standards sunk this low I got rabies.

Black Swan

Must be that time of the month?

Star Lord

Are you fussy who you dance with?
I'm not thats why I'm asking you!

_Kaiser_

any cheesy chatup line

Star Lord

Hi! So me you and your mum, how about it?

_Kaiser_

thats your sister? shes a slut.. had her last week!

Black Swan

"Is that a pistol in ye pocket, or are ye glad to see me?" (May West revision)

Matt Holck

:hug:

challengemaster

#1 - *walks up and stares at chest*

BOOBS!

#2 - *walk up* Hey.. you've really beautiful boobs... i mean eyes! eh... boobeyes!... *doh*

#3 - your arse looks like its hungry the way its eating your knickers.. how about letting me feed it?

#4 - I WANT YORE BABIEZ!

#5 - so.. i realised you're the one from the pictures your sister showed me last week when we were in bed... How's it goin' ?

Black Swan

Wanna dance? Oh, don't worry, I'll be wearing my taekwondo safety kicks just in case you step on my toes.

challengemaster

I've got diahreoa

Did you know that genital warts is contagious?

I think I just wet myself.

Hi, I'm a rapist .. erm .. I meant Rap Artist.

Star Lord

1: Hi, I'm horny and you look like you'd put out.

2: Hi you look like my ex!

Black Swan

I'm on a limited budget, so can we skip the courtship and get on with business?

_Kaiser_

wow!! are those real? can i feel?

Black Swan

Mix our double helix?

_Kaiser_

so how about a shag then?

Star Lord

I wanna be on you!

DarkJager

I'd love to wear your face as a mask....

Hail 2 Da Chimp

So whats your user name?

Matt Holck

expression should be grander than the slow spiral of the milky way
feelings hold the universe together
I'm not afraid to expond my revelations

Star Lord

Matt Holck wrote:

expression should be grander than the slow spiral of the milky way
feelings hold the universe together
I'm not afraid to expond my revelations

You win. Thats the worst so far!!!

How about:

Wanna go halfers on a ba$tard?

funky penguin

I'm going to rape you.

homah_7ft

Oh it isn't chocolate round my mouth.

littlesurfer

i've been following you to work every day for a month...you smell pretty

_Kaiser_

littlesurfer wrote:

i've been following you to work every day for a month...you smell pretty

That was YOU??

"So do you come here often?" :rolleyes:

Star Lord

Hi, I'm making a doll of you, and I need some of your hair!

_Kaiser_

Y'know you really should close your curtains before you get changed...

boneless

"Wanna hear a joke that will make your boobs fall off?... oh! Sorry, I see you heard it already..."

Star Lord

So, your place or my grans?

Capt'n Midnight

Nice shoes.
wana f**k ?

Carbiens

point at the wall, say "WHAT THE **** IS THAT????" then while she's distracted, pick her up and run out the door.

tried and tested.

Star Lord

I saw you from across the room, and I though I just have to come over here and see those lovely funbags up close. Mind if I motorboat them?

littlesurfer

can we swap seats,..?..i want to feel the heat from your stool!

Jesus Wept

'are your nipples pink or brown?'

_Kaiser_

My mate rekons you've had a boob job. I say you haven't. Mind if I see who's right? *squeeze*

Sofaspud

Hi there, I'm a bit desperate at the moment, and you seem like you have low standards.

Matt Holck

DamoElDiablo wrote:

You win. Thats the worst so far!!!

How about:

Wanna go halfers on a ba$tard?

yes
if you could hum me a few bars

Star Lord

Hey did you drop something there?
Haha! Made you look at my penis!!!

Matt Holck

is this all there is?

Star Lord

You look like my sister. I want you.