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Sisters Boyfriend

  • 08-06-2006 11:38am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi all,

    Im only looking for opinions on this one, because theres not a whole lot I can do. OK here goes,

    Im living at home with my parents, my sister and her boyfriend. The rest of my siblings have flown the nest. Im 27 and they are both 23. My sister and her boyfriend are living with us for the past 8 months and will be there for another 3 or 4 months, as they are building a house and its not finished yet. Now they dont pay rent at home, cos my parents are helping them save for the new house. They dont contribute to groceries, bills, absolutely nothing.

    The thing is , he drives me insane. He's rude, obnoxious, arrogant, etc. Some examples:

    He burps after everyhting he drinks (Not a little burp, one that I'd say the neighbours can also hear). He's also very proud of his burping talent!!

    If anyone is watching a program on tv and the ad breaks come on, he will grab the remote and turn on the soccer until the ads are over.

    He grunts at my sister every now and again to make him a cup of tea.(Bigger eejit she is).

    He eats everything I buy (eg, frozen pizzas, yoghurts, etc..)

    He drinks my beer in the fridge. Very rarely buys his own, and when he does he buys the cheapest of beer. (P**s water)

    He does no work around the house. Its a struggle for him to make the bed.

    At the weekends he does not move from the sofa.

    This one really drives me nuts: He fills the kettle (now I mean nearly to the top) for a cup of tea, wanders off for about 10 minutes. Comes back. Boils it up again. Wanders off again. After boiling it maybe 4 times, he'll decide to actually make a cup of tea.

    He uses my PC whenever Im not around. Im after deleting more crap from him looking at dodgy sites.

    He leaves lights on, taps running, stereo on day & night, might forget 5 days of the week to lock the front door behind him, always late going to work (Always), the list goes on & on & on & on............................


    Funnily enough besides the fact that he's a lazy ass scratcher, he's a nice guy. Dont ask me how, but he is. My sis thinks hes the Beez Neez :confused:

    Im just get really mad sometimes. Anyone living with one of these?


«1

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,680 ✭✭✭Skyuser


    You just don't like him and every little thing that he does annoys you, no matter what it is. But why don't you like him? Are you jealous of his and yours sisters relationship?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,305 ✭✭✭The Clown Man


    He sounds like a laugh. :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,345 ✭✭✭Velvet Vocals


    Gosh, he sound just lovely!:rolleyes:
    What an di*k Head!!! obviously your not jealous of your sisters relationship, who wants to be grunted at to make the tea that is when he's not burping or farting!
    No, you'll just have to say it to your sister and get her to deal with it, I mean they are living in your space! Whatever about the burps and stuff you might not be able to get him to stop doing that, but you can get him to stop eating your food, drink your beer and using your pc!!! I mean FFS!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,882 ✭✭✭Diamondmaker


    Thats sharing ehhh!!

    Only thing you can do is talk to him about the larger issues:

    Leaving the door open
    taking your stuff etc..

    And hopefully he can do something about it.

    Tell him it IS only fair he chips in around the house tidying wise..get Sis to back you up.

    Not much you can do about ones habits though , belching etc. Just gotta live with them. Im sure you have habits that annoy him.

    You asre being a bit harsh moaning about him squeezing in his football viewing during the adds of your show and well... the kettle issue, hes obviously a bit daft but you are worse for thinking about it too much. Really whats so bad about either of these?

    Its all part of the merry tapestry of life and different people, I thoguht I got over it all when I bought my own place but my GF has as many habits as any one else ever did!:D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2 Reckless_Joe


    he sounds like most lads out there. Your probably just seeing the worst of him. Just grin and bear it for the next few months and password protect your pc.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,074 ✭✭✭damo


    All the things youve mentioned there arent exactly deadly serious issues. I've been in that situation before where the person i lived with really got on top of me and every little thing he did got on my nerves. Unfortunately the only solution is one of you moving out.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,985 ✭✭✭✭zAbbo


    Options:

    #1 - Move out and find yourself somewhere to live, you are 27
    #2 - Confront him/her about it.
    #3 - Ride out the 3/4 months, then you can be only child again.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 850 ✭✭✭DOLEMAN


    Raging wrote:
    He burps after everyhting he drinks (Not a little burp, one that I'd say the neighbours can also hear). He's also very proud of his burping talent!!

    Not a problem.
    Raging wrote:
    If anyone is watching a program on tv and the ad breaks come on, he will grab the remote and turn on the soccer until the ads are over.

    Not a problem.
    Raging wrote:
    He grunts at my sister every now and again to make him a cup of tea.(Bigger eejit she is).

    Not a problem.
    Raging wrote:
    He eats everything I buy (eg, frozen pizzas, yoghurts, etc..)

    Are you exaggerating here? Could you tell him to stop?
    Raging wrote:
    He drinks my beer in the fridge. Very rarely buys his own, and when he does he buys the cheapest of beer. (P**s water)

    Are you exaggerating here? Could you tell him to stop?
    Raging wrote:
    He does no work around the house. Its a struggle for him to make the bed.

    OK. He should pull his weight. I don't see how his bed is your problem though...
    Raging wrote:
    At the weekends he does not move from the sofa.

    Not a problem.
    Raging wrote:
    This one really drives me nuts: He fills the kettle (now I mean nearly to the top) for a cup of tea, wanders off for about 10 minutes. Comes back. Boils it up again. Wanders off again. After boiling it maybe 4 times, he'll decide to actually make a cup of tea.

    Not a problem.
    Raging wrote:
    He uses my PC whenever Im not around. Im after deleting more crap from him looking at dodgy sites.

    Are you exaggerating here? Could you tell him to stop?
    Raging wrote:
    He leaves lights on, taps running, stereo on day & night, might forget 5 days of the week to lock the front door behind him, always late going to work (Always), the list goes on & on & on & on............................

    Hmmm. Sure...

    I think the problem is you TBH. Yes it sounds like he could pull his weight a bit more, but this is hardly a reason to hate someone... I think maybe you are confusing being sick of seeing him all the time with him actually being a major problem... :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,630 ✭✭✭Corben Dallas


    LOL :D

    Eats your food, uses your PC, is a TV remote Dictator, drinks your beer (and when shamed into replacing it) then replaces with 4 cans of 'Dutch Gold' LOL :D

    Man u need to lay down the law here, hes using u, your family, u sister and everyone else u visits yur house as doormats and his personal servants.

    >gave me a laugh reading it tho. :D
    btw *the 'boiling the kettle 4 times B4 he actually gets round to making a cuppa' lark is him hoping that some ramdom person will see the boiling kettle and make him a coffee.

    LOL :D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,380 ✭✭✭chuckles30


    Move out and share with people of your own age for a couple of years - he'll seem perfectly normal after that!!

    But if moving out is not an option, just ask him to leave your stuff alone. Everything else you just have to live with.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,044 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    The Clown Man, unhelpful and off-topic posting will get you banned from this forum.
    Do take time to read the charter which contains the rules and abide by them.
    Have a nice day.
    Thaedydal


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 25,848 ✭✭✭✭Zombrex


    Raging wrote:
    Hi all,

    Im only looking for opinions on this one, because theres not a whole lot I can do. OK here goes,

    He sounds like a bit of a scum bag (or used to having people look after him). I feel sorry for your sister

    Tell him to stop taking your fecking stuff (if anyone I've shared a house with eat my food or drank my beer I would be raging .. and it has happened with this fecking arrogant idiot I lived with for a year in college) :mad:

    Otherwise just hang on till they move out or move out yourself. Also maybe talk to your parents about it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    Set this thread as your homepage for the next time he logs onto your pc ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,943 ✭✭✭BeardyGit


    Come on, what's this all about? Is this really a personal issue or is it just a bit of a whinge about someone?

    I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt here and assume you really do see this as a terrible problem - Something that's causing you stress and generally become a real issue. Ready for it?

    Your parents call the shots at the house in which you live - You don't. It's up to them to make the rules and enforce them, not you. They set the boundaries, not you. And you know what, you're not in any way in control and you never should be when it comes to how your sister and her partner behave. It wouldn't be right if he just ate and drank his way through the freezer but I doubt that's what's really happening. If you're coming here to look for advice about this, I'd guess you haven't even said it to him yourself, have you?

    You're a 27 year old adult, still living at home (I bet you're a bloke), moaning about someone who's 4 years younger than you, who's not just 'dating' your sister in 'your' house, drinking your beer and eating all your pizza's (give me a break) and...here's the kicker....Buying his own house, with your sister, where he'll do the exact same things there.

    You know what the fix to this one is? Move out and/or get over yourself. From what you've written, I'd say you need to think about getting yourself either a girlfriend (I'm guessing here - But you're giving me the clues) or a hobby - Because right now it's pretty obvious you have too much time on your hands.

    Come on, will you? You're an adult for crying out loud......


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 850 ✭✭✭DOLEMAN


    HavoK wrote:
    Set this thread as your homepage for the next time he logs onto your pc ;)

    :D haha that's actually a very funny idea!

    Although I'm sure a polite chat with him/your sister could solve the problems...


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,082 ✭✭✭Tobias Greeshman


    I promote HavoKs idea

    My god what a fecking lazy p**** to have to live with. Have you're parents not being p***ed off with his behavour, I know if my sisters bf acted like this he'd be shown the door.

    I think it's about time you had a chat to your parents or your sister about his behavour. Hopefully that should be enough to sort it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,943 ✭✭✭BeardyGit


    Ah, okay, I'm not finished - Everyone's picturing Onslow from Keeping up Appearances, aren't they?

    Think about this, they're in the process of building a house. Think about the amount of work you have to do to afford that. Think how skint you are in the lead up to buying a house. There's no way he's sitting around in his vest, scratching his nads and throwing peanuts at the mother in law to make him a cuppa and a bacon sandwich, is there?

    The question the OP needs to ask is simply whether or not his sister is happy with this guy. If she is, he should be happy and simply put up with what's going on for another few months if that's at all possible. If this bloke was fleecing from his wallet, swearing at his mother, kicking the dog or bringing his drunken mates home for a feed from the pub, he'd have reason to complain.

    But he doesn't. It takes all sorts - A popular and rather true saying. You say yourself that he's a nice bloke aside from these irritating 'qualities', true?

    I don't think you're a muppet, okay? - I just think you should count your blessings instead of whinging about a few inconveniences. If he's a good bloke, give him the benefit of the doubt - Maybe consider that he's leaving every cent in the bank because he has to to get the mortgage signed off on completion of the house. It's not necessarily that he's a sponger - He may simply not realise that he's causing you some grief.....

    I'm not saying you should take everything lying down - But decide if it's really worth having a go at someone instead of just rising above the situation and maybe seeing that it's circumstances that are causing him to 'nick' your beer and pizza, so to speak.

    Gil


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,393 ✭✭✭✭Vegeta


    oh my god OP you know me???? only kidding

    To be honest with you, you have 2 choices, put up with it until they move into their house or move out, after all you are 27


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,333 ✭✭✭Cake Fiend


    Have you told him that these things bother you?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,956 ✭✭✭layke


    Sico wrote:
    Have you told him that these things bother you?

    What he said x 10.

    It's not going to change unless you roll up the sleeves and put the knuckle dusters on.

    Also, have you told your sis?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,099 ✭✭✭Static M.e.


    If he drinks your beer he should replace your beer, same brand. if I came home and found my (Acholol beverage) repeatedly missing I would honestly freak out and I would consider myself a very calm person. Its just plain bad manners, and if someone had replaced with some p*** water I think that would just annoy me more.

    Food wise, take your own shelf in the freezer and tell him and your sister you dont want them taking from it.

    Apart from that you probably just need a break from living with them. It can be quite annoying having people move back into "your" house (Your parents place) after you having it to yourself for so long.

    Win the important fights with them and you'll be fine. Thats food and Drink btw :)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Im Female, not male, and no I dont fancy him or Im not jealous of my sister in any way.

    OK I know im 27 but Im in college and not in any position to move out.

    Yes it had been said to him a couple of times when they moved in at the start, to start pulling his weight or he would have to go. But as they say, a leopard never changes his spots!

    I said it to him about 2 months ago about the food and drink thing. It stopped for about a week and a half but now he's back to his good old self.

    Yea things might be tight while they are saving for the house, but things are tight for me too being a student and all that. If I couldnt afford to replace something I ate or drink, I would'nt consume it in the first place.

    How can some people see this as perfectly normal behaviour? Can you honestly say that this wouldnt drive you mad.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Oh, and no DOLEMAN, none of what I have said about him has been exaggerated. All very much true.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 192 ✭✭LikeOhMyGawd!


    I think you may be in love with him but are in denial about it. If he didn't matter so much to you, you wouldn't notice his annyoing habits.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,247 ✭✭✭✭6th


    Go to your mum and tell her you found that he'd been looking at REALLY dodgy sh*t! And that you had to delete it in case the gaurds got involved. Tell her not to say anything and watch her hit the roof. Cry if you can and say that what you saw really affected you - if you like make an appointment with ur GP and ask ur mum to go with you for support.

    Problem solved!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,099 ✭✭✭Static M.e.


    Dunno, I think your right, its bad manners basically.

    Face the facts its not HIS house, its his GFs House. He has no rights and dont deserve any special treatment just because he is going out with her sister. It should be the exact opposite.

    He should be helping around the house
    Keeping his room tidy (5 year olds know to put the toys away)
    Eating and drinking, grand he has too but constantly taking her drink which he has been told NOT to, is bang out of order.

    Im quite sure he is a nice guy and he makes your sister happy which is very important and saving for the house which means no holidays or lavish spending. But not buying food or drink? thats just miserly espically considering how much he is saving living with her parents.

    It baffles me how people dont see it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 192 ✭✭LikeOhMyGawd!


    6th wrote:
    Go to your mum and tell her you found that he'd been looking at REALLY dodgy sh*t! And that you had to delete it in case the gaurds got involved. Tell her not to say anything and watch her hit the roof. Cry if you can and say that what you saw really affected you - if you like make an appointment with ur GP and ask ur mum to go with you for support.

    Problem solved!

    And don't forget to mention he's been using an Ouija board too


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,247 ✭✭✭✭6th


    And don't forget to mention he's been using an Ouija board too

    Yep a pink Ouija Board with pictures of naked men on it!

    Seriously my advice will solve the problem, might make a few more but he wont be living there anymore or he may just behave.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,345 ✭✭✭Velvet Vocals


    Raging wrote:
    Im Female, not male, and no I dont fancy him or Im not jealous of my sister in any way.

    OK I know im 27 but Im in college and not in any position to move out.

    Yes it had been said to him a couple of times when they moved in at the start, to start pulling his weight or he would have to go. But as they say, a leopard never changes his spots!

    I said it to him about 2 months ago about the food and drink thing. It stopped for about a week and a half but now he's back to his good old self.

    Yea things might be tight while they are saving for the house, but things are tight for me too being a student and all that. If I couldnt afford to replace something I ate or drink, I would'nt consume it in the first place.

    How can some people see this as perfectly normal behaviour? Can you honestly say that this wouldnt drive you mad.


    This would all drive me insane! I think your very good not to have hit him with something large by now! To be honest I'm as surprised as you are that no one else seems to be taking you seriously..... maybe that means there's something wrong with us:rolleyes:
    But honestly, talk to your sister, say that you've reached the end of your tether and you don't think you can stand it for the remaining few months, try and be diplomatic about because you don't want to start a family fewd or anything! But say that he just has to either stop taking your things or at the very least replace what he's taken. In no way is he to use your PC without asking..... with that you could have a word with him on the side and say that you'll tell your sister about the stuff he's been looking at if he doesn't give it a rest!

    Failing that girl, you'll just have to take it on the chin! Just keep telling yourself, it's only for a few more months, then they'll be in there new place and he'll be free to play couch commando while going commando, drinking his own beer and farting to his hearts content


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,247 ✭✭✭✭6th


    6th wrote:
    Go to your mum and tell her you found that he'd been looking at REALLY dodgy sh*t! And that you had to delete it in case the gaurds got involved. Tell her not to say anything and watch her hit the roof. Cry if you can and say that what you saw really affected you - if you like make an appointment with ur GP and ask ur mum to go with you for support.

    Problem solved!


    i was taking it seriously when i posted the above.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 717 ✭✭✭Mad Mike


    It sounds like an awful situation and I do sympathise with you. It is only for a few months - perhaps you can come up with coping strategies. If you have your own room then maybe you can move your stuff (PC?) in there and let it be known that he is not allowed in. Other than that I really don't see that you have much choice but to put up with it. You are after all an adult and your parents are as a courtesy allowing you to live in their house. You pretty much have to accept the other guests they choose to invite. I don't think it is your right to start laying down the law in their house. I think that every family home eventually begins to feel a bit like a madhouse. Perhaps this is nature's way of getting us to leave the nest and of course as a previous poster has said once you do get out and see how other people live often you realise that your home wasn't quite so bizarre after all.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,776 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    6th wrote:
    i was taking it seriously when i posted the above.

    Now the problem here is that the moment you mention 'guards' your mother will think 'child porn' and ask specifically what you found. At which point you'll say....?

    Worse, she might sayn othing - she might just pre-empt things and head down to the local station and report him. Your computer gets taken for a forensic and which will mean you're without your PC for a few weeks at least. Assuming you're making it up, nothing will be found and you'll have a lot of explaining to do.

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Glad some people think its just not normal or good manners to behave like he does. Yea I guess I'll just have to find another way of coping with it. Its not easy though.

    Suppose its how you are brought up though. I have seen him treat his own mum like S**t. Poor woman is elderly and the things his family expect her to do are unbelievable.

    Really pity my sister. Love is blind!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,247 ✭✭✭✭6th


    Well if she takes it as child porn then tahst up to her, but thats not what you said is it? You just say alot of really nsty pron, it upset you and you got paranoid that the guards would be involved.

    i still stand by that this will work

    Either that or say it was gay porn, that its really affected you and you cant sleep. Again ask ur mum to go to the gp with you to get something for your nerves and sleeping.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,400 ✭✭✭✭r3nu4l


    OP, this is extermely bad form on his part, unfortunately having shared with loads of people in college I can say it's not uncommon! There are a lot of ignorant slobs out there!

    1. Password protect your PC, if he wants to use it, tell him you'll switch on and log in for him, don't give the password to anyone! If anyone complains say you are worried about spyware as someone has been visiting dodgy websites on your PC. Leave it at that.

    2. If you pay for the food and beer then he should replace it, make note of what you have and when it's missing ask in front of your parents "Has anyone eaten my pizza/been drinking my beer?" Then ask him to replace it and say what type of food/beer it was. Tell him when you want it replaced. If it isn't replaced by then ask him for the money, again in front of your parents.

    These are the main issues I see. The belching, remote grabbing and kettle boiling, while annoying and ignorant are not exactly the worst habits in the world.

    Just keep reminding him every time he doesn't pay up. Setting this thread as your homepage is a great idea :D Also having a white background desktopwith the words "Please refrain from browsing [insert dodgy site name here]!" would be a nice touch.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Yea Im gonna Password protect the PC, because Im fed up of cleaning it down after he has been on it.

    I think what led me to starting this thread was, when I came home from work yesterday evening I bought a couple of things in the supermarket on the way home. I went in for a shower when I got home and when I got out, lo & behold here he was digging in to a Pot Noodle that I had just bought.

    I swear, if I bought a bag of horse manure, he'd put it between 2 slices of bread.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,345 ✭✭✭Velvet Vocals


    I went in for a shower when I got home and when I got out, lo & behold here he was digging in to a Pot Noodle that I had just bought.

    Oh my God!:eek: I'm actually pissed off with him for you!!! Did you say anything when you saw him eating it? You should have said "WHAT THE FU*K!!!!"
    He's actually winding me up now.... god help him if he lived with me!!

    *takes deep breath*... right... I'm calming down now

    PS... Pot noodle.......he did you a favor:)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 17,247 ✭✭✭✭6th


    He's pissing me off too.

    Take the fcuker down!

    PM me you want any help or suggestions - my other suggestion still stands but i have plenty more but dont want to give too much away. Also i dont want people thinking i'm nasty ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,044 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    Take a deep breath the lot of you and count to 100.

    This is not just a case of a loathsome housemate, this person may eventually marry the op and become a member of the family and co mingle thier dna and produce offspring with the ops sibling.

    What are the chances that certain actions may loose the op thier relationship with the sibling and/or damnage the relationship with the sibling and the parents so that the poor girl could be stuck with that cretin with out the backup and support of her family.

    OP start standing your ground, have a talk about house rules with your parents raise your complaints in a civil fashion if you have to get a roll of white stickers and label what ever you buy but all out war with him and by extension your sibling may cost you more then you can imagine.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 43,044 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    6th, unhelpful and off-topic posting will get you banned from this forum.
    Do take time to read the charter which contains the rules and abide by them.
    Have a nice day.
    Thaedydal


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,525 ✭✭✭vorbis


    I don't get why some people suggest that the OP should appease this slob. Gil_Dub I'm frankly astonished that someone would react to someone robbing their stuff in that fashion. Personally I would have it out with him. if I saw my roommate eating some food I'd just bought I'd hit the roof. Thankfully they don't and if I took their beer and never bought decent stuff, I would expect them to hit the roof too.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,943 ✭✭✭BeardyGit


    vorbis wrote:
    I don't get why some people suggest that the OP should appease this slob. Gil_Dub I'm frankly astonished that someone would react to someone robbing their stuff in that fashion. Personally I would have it out with him. if I saw my roommate eating some food I'd just bought I'd hit the roof. Thankfully they don't and if I took their beer and never bought decent stuff, I would expect them to hit the roof too.

    Hey, don't take issue with me. If anything, look at the general concensus that's being reached about this guy without anything to really provide balance and perspective. Everyone here has just one side to this story and while a reasonably convincing argument is put forward by the OP, the other person involved here is blissfully unaware that he's being discussed with a load of strangers and nobody to even attempt to represent him.

    Like with everything any of us do in life, we'll make a better choice once we're informed, and if that's simply not possible, the least we should do is try to put ourselves in the other persons shoes. My personal values and good manners would prevent me from behaving in the way this young man has been described. However, many simply haven't had the benefit of a 'decent upbringing' and while that's not an excuse, it is certainly an explanation for some peoples behaviour. I don't expect anyone to excuse him but they should certainly be prepared to consider he may not have the ability to meet someone elses expectations regarding his behaviour.

    OP, Not for a minute would I suggest you become a doormat - But you need to understand that he may not be capable of understanding how upsetting this is to you. Let him know and if he really is a nice guy as you mentioned, perhaps he will repeat the effort he made when you mentioned it before. Tell him that he's to ask before taking beer and if he thinks something in the fridge or freezer belongs to you he must ask before eating it...Point out that you're a student and even though you're living at home you don't have cash to spend on him. Point out to him that you can hardly ask your folks for money either as they're already covering him and your sister, on top of their mortgage, your expenses etc etc. Help him understand that when he takes something, it's not just taking something - That you or your folks have to pay for it. That should put it in terms that he'll understand if he's saving every last cent for the house - He'll know what it's like to be broke and might just appreciate your position a little more. If it's your PC, password protect it as suggested - That's your own fault to be honest. But if it's in the sitting-room or hallway, and was paid for by your folks, mention it to them first. And for anything else like the kettle boiling complaint, leave it be. You don't pay the bills so it's not your business......

    This is simple stuff really....Don't overcomplicate it or pay any attention to other childish suggestions of retribution - You're most certainly better than that.

    Gil


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 29 Brend


    Your 27....What are you doing living at home in the first place, you sould have been out of there like 8-9 years ago. No sympathy!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Thought it was my brother for a second, but hes much older, I know where your coming from and im a guy.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Im not looking for sympathy Brend!

    I dunno how it works in your home, but in mine there is no certain age that you have to be to move out. With the rising cost of houses, its not uncommon for people my age or older to be still living at home.

    I was living out of home for a couple of years, but I went back to college so I moved home. Therefore moving out again is not an option.

    This person is a guest in our house and should behave as a guest would. Why should I move out?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,345 ✭✭✭Velvet Vocals


    Brend wrote:
    Your 27....What are you doing living at home in the first place, you sould have been out of there like 8-9 years ago. No sympathy!

    That's a much isn't it! She's a student! Lots of people stay home longer these days because moving out is so expensive! But regarless... that isn't the issue. She could be having the same problem with a flat/house mate if she had moved out. The issue is repect and she clearly isn't getting any from this guy:rolleyes:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,048 ✭✭✭SimpleSam06


    I have a case like that before and you know what my sister dumped him soon after their first baby learned how to walk :D..

    Tell your sister how you feel..This guy must know he doesnt have manners at all..he's feeling too comfortable huh :(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 19,341 ✭✭✭✭Chucky the tree


    I think the reason people gave you a hard time for the post is becuase of the petty and childish problems you included in your rant.

    If you just said you where pissed off with him eating your food/ drink and using your PC everyone wouldo f agreed with you and felt it was out of order.

    Instead you decided to act completely irrelevant points included here:
    Raging wrote:
    If anyone is watching a program on tv and the ad breaks come on, he will grab the remote and turn on the soccer until the ads are over.

    He grunts at my sister every now and again to make him a cup of tea.(Bigger eejit she is).

    At the weekends he does not move from the sofa.

    This one really drives me nuts: He fills the kettle (now I mean nearly to the top) for a cup of tea, wanders off for about 10 minutes. Comes back. Boils it up again. Wanders off again. After boiling it maybe 4 times, he'll decide to actually make a cup of tea.

    always late going to work (Always), the list goes on & on & on & on............................

    ?

    He checks the footie scores during the add breaks? and you give out about it? oh dear. Are the adds really that important to you or something?

    So what if he grunts at your sister for a cup of tea? If he doesnt do it to you i dont see how you can get invovled.

    Again, whats the big deal? We all like to relax at the weekend.

    He feels the kettle 4 times before making a cup of tea? wow, a regular adolf hitler isnt he? Is it your kettle? are you worried heat 4 times will break it? OR maybe the extra cost in electricity? I really dont understand the big deal with that one either.

    Hes late for work? Are you his boss as well as his soon to be sister in law? Its none of your business if he is late or doesnt even bother turning up.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 33,776 ✭✭✭✭Princess Consuela Bananahammock


    I think the reason people gave you a hard time for the post is becuase of the petty and childish problems you included in your rant.

    If you just said you where pissed off with him eating your food/ drink and using your PC everyone wouldo f agreed with you and felt it was out of order.

    Instead you decided to act completely irrelevant points included here:



    He checks the footie scores during the add breaks? and you give out about it? oh dear. Are the adds really that important to you or something?

    So what if he grunts at your sister for a cup of tea? If he doesnt do it to you i dont see how you can get invovled.

    Again, whats the big deal? We all like to relax at the weekend.

    He feels the kettle 4 times before making a cup of tea? wow, a regular adolf hitler isnt he? Is it your kettle? are you worried heat 4 times will break it? OR maybe the extra cost in electricity? I really dont understand the big deal with that one either.

    Hes late for work? Are you his boss as well as his soon to be sister in law? Its none of your business if he is late or doesnt even bother turning up.


    You the boyfriend...?

    Everything I don't like is either woke or fascist - possibly both - pick one.



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,391 ✭✭✭fatherdougalmag


    I get the impression that this is the OP's younger sister and, as such, there is an inherent sibling protection thing going on. The OP should highlight these things with his sister and project things forward should things get serious between them.


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