Going on Dates

JustCoz

What do people think of going on dates? It's not really a done thing in Ireland like it is in America or other countries. Personally I find them sort of embarrassing and awkward if you don't know the person that well and they never really lead anywhere.

What do other people think? Do you go on dates often?

anthonymcg

Depends on your definition of a "date". If you met someone in a bar and then you went to the cinema a week later isn't that a date?

JustCoz

Yeah exactly. I think that would be a date. Loads of my friends are always going on dates with people they meet on nights out but I dn't think I'd ever meet up with someone you met on a night out. I'd find it way too awkward but that's just me

Nalz

In the words of Des Bishop

"Irish people dont date...they shift"

scuba steve

ha ha, that crazy Des Bishop!

hullaballoo

JustCoz wrote:

What do people think of going on dates? It's not really a done thing in Ireland like it is in America or other countries. Personally I find them sort of embarrassing and awkward if you don't know the person that well and they never really lead anywhere.

What do other people think? Do you go on dates often?

Will you go out with me?

hullaballoo

Did I just make things awkward?

JustCoz

Ha ha! Are you playing reverse psychology hullaballoo?

susanna

I do find them really awkward, but I suppose you have to take the chance, you might go out with someone and really hit it off

Le Rack

DAtes aren't the done thing in Ireland its just that simple... I know a few couples who go on the odd date but you still here them say things about awkwardness and nervousness...

One boyf I had we used to do stupid little things, like he "took me for dinner" one day, we went to the chippie and he paid! We had a tea party in front of the fire one day... that was fun!

Is the cinema really a date place anymore cuz mostly people just go to the cinema these days so they have somewhere dark to shove their tongues down eacothers throats, they don't go as a couple to snuggle up and watch the film?

hullaballoo

At least you didn't say "I don't think so".

Repli

http://www.ianai.net/jokes/forumpix/Porn%20Cheaper.jpg

JustCoz

I think that if someone has the courage to ask you out in the first place you should be nice to them. That "I don't think so" girl is an idiot

Font22

hullaballo that girl was an idiot! bet shes kicking herself now! just coz- boys are stupid, throw stones/boulders/grenades at them. i hate boys, except for my dad and hullaballo!

Le Rack

Does anyone else hate it when a guy says "we're such good freinds I don't want to ruin that, I just don't know if we'd work out as a couple" Firstly, you'll never know if you don't try and secondly, if you are such good friends then what harm can come of just giving it a go? Especially when it's acommonly known fact that the both of you actually like eachother?

Font22

like i said..........guys are stupid

kjt

Le Rack wrote:

Does anyone else hate it when a guy says "we're such good freinds I don't want to ruin that, I just don't know if we'd work out as a couple" Firstly, you'll never know if you don't try and secondly, if you are such good friends then what harm can come of just giving it a go? Especially when it's acommonly known fact that the both of you actually like eachother?

Possibly... because when it doesnt work out you's cant be friends at the end of it all. Just my personal history. (too emotionally attached and so on...)

Le Rack

I'm friends with all my ex's and I was best friends with some of them before we went out... however I am only 18 and have a grand total of 7 real ex's that I actually went out with...

JustCoz

Well considering you're only 18 thats an impressive love life!

rick_fantastic

Le Rack wrote:

Does anyone else hate it when a guy says "we're such good freinds I don't want to ruin that, I just don't know if we'd work out as a couple"
Firstly, you'll never know if you don't try and secondly, if you are such good friends then what harm can come of just giving it a go?

its just a nice way of saying not interested.

id never take a girl out to the cinema on a date, especially not the first time i see them after scoring them in a niteclub

cant beat nice meal / bottle of wine and bit of proper conversation

Le Rack

rick_fantastic wrote:

its just a nice way of saying not interested.

I know but it's wicked irritating, it's much easier and nicer to just say summit simple to the effect of "You're a really good friend and all but I just don't see you in that light"

See? Much easier, with the other one, it's knida like "hmm so they like me but they think we're too good friends..."

Eminem

It depends how close you are as best mates Because if it happends and dosent work out it sucks;)

sprinkles

I think its fairly common thing.

I've been on a good few over the years.....

That is if your taking about when you meet a girl out some night, swap numbers and arrange to meet up or "go on a date as you put it".

Doesn't have to be to the cinema either....pub, ice skating (best one yet in terms of activity imo), funderland, gig, etc..etc..

Le Rack

Be warned teen rant fast approaching!

I'm still friends with my ex's yeah, but there's also guys who are like my best friends, my mam was like their second mother, and we've had "encounters" and didn't work out as a proper relationship but we still stayed friends... maybe I just lead a very simple life!

Fobia

Le Rack wrote:

Especially when it's acommonly known fact that the both of you actually like eachother?

Le Rack wrote:

know but it's wicked irritating,

Don't mean to nitpick, but if it's a commonly known fact that the both of you like eachother, how does him saying he's simply not interested add up? I'm not sure what you mean by "like", maybe that's causing my confusion..

nitrogen

They're normally quite important if you're looking for a relationship!

Whether it'ss called a date in Ireland or not, you still have dates, whether it be meeting in a pub with mates or the cinema.

Eminem

Ye fair enough it can i got with one of my best mates before we just got sick of it and went back to being best mates but i went out with of my best mates another time and it didnt work .

Le Rack

I'm using a bad example with a complicated history. We did like eacother, a lot, there was an incident, a common friend sh!t stirrin, he said he wanted to go out with me, until the stirrir... and it's a small town, people get around, he got this other one, efore eventually going out with my best friend, the "love of his life"

TheVan

Personally I lament the non-existence of dates!

I went on a good few with my ex back in the day and much prefer dinner, the cinema and random activities much more than meeting some girl in a nightclub! Also with my dance skills I reckon my stronger environment is the date one rather than the nightclub!

However I think Irish people say they'd love dates but actually shy away from them in the end?

And no, not many.....

JustCoz

However I think Irish people say they'd love dates but actually shy away from them in the end?

I second that. It's not really much of an Irish thing is it?

Repli

I had a date once. It was August 8th 2003.

TheVan

JustCoz wrote:

I second that. It's not really much of an Irish thing is it?

It really should be though? I think its a much better way to get to know someone. Also there's the excitement before the date and also you have picked something fun/interesting (hopefully!) and so you'll have great fun!

I think Irish people need to remember that a date doesnt bind you and something great could come out of it!

Lady_Macbeth

eh?! are 'dates' being defined here as general activities done as couple? Sure, if a couple doesn't go on a 'date' then what the hell do they do?! My boyfriend and I will go to the cinema, pub, etc., but are they considered 'dates' as such? If they are and everyone's saying no they don't go on dates then what do y'all do with your other half?! If you mean meeting a person for the first time (properly, after meeting them on a night out that is) then what exactly else is there to do? I mean you're not both going to meet up and just stand and the side of the road swaying to and fro chatting away to each other are you?

Lady_Macbeth

Le Rack wrote:

Is the cinema really a date place anymore cuz mostly people just go to the cinema these days so they have somewhere dark to shove their tongues down eacothers throats, they don't go as a couple to snuggle up and watch the film?

Uh-oh, my boyfriend and I have been misinterpreting the purpose of the cinema so....we go as a couple to snuggle up and watch the film. Heck, they charge enough, I'm not paying to sit in the dark to kiss him!

JustCoz

eh?! are 'dates' being defined here as general activities done as couple?

No, I'm talking about first dates here, or second and third dates. Couples going out isn't a date imo

TheVan

Lady_Macbeth wrote:

eh?! are 'dates' being defined here as general activities done as couple? Sure, if a couple doesn't go on a 'date' then what the hell do they do?! My boyfriend and I will go to the cinema, pub, etc., but are they considered 'dates' as such? If they are and everyone's saying no they don't go on dates then what do y'all do with your other half?! If you mean meeting a person for the first time (properly, after meeting them on a night out that is) then what exactly else is there to do? I mean you're not both going to meet up and just stand and the side of the road swaying to and fro chatting away to each other are you?

Well as far as I know we're talking about meeting up with people for the first time. This isn't necessarily after meeting up on a night out. Think one of the points here is, is it ok to just ask people out, not having scored before? I could be wrong...correct me if i am!
I only used the example of me and my ex cos it was a long term relationship and I haven't any other real experience with dates per se!

daiixi

I reckon dates are great! There's nothing more fun than going out with someone who you hardly know and getting to know them.. Finding out what makes them tick, see if you can shock them, getting those first kisses.. ahhh dates! :D:D

Eminem

Date that sounds so weird to me dont like the word

daiixi

Eminem wrote:

Date that sounds so weird to me dont like the word

What would you prefer to call it?

440Hz

It seems to be an Irish thing alright. i like the idea of a date, but they never seem to happen in this country. One of my best mates just came back after travelling the globe and has spent the whole time since she got back complaining about how Irish guys dont ask people out on dates. When she was in New Zealand she went on dates all the time, and is constantly going on about how much she would love if Irish guys would change their ways... I dont see it happening tbh, but it would be nice!!

buzzandwiks

Lady_Macbeth wrote:

eh?! are 'dates' being defined here as general activities done as couple? Sure, if a couple doesn't go on a 'date' then what the hell do they do?! My boyfriend and I will go to the cinema, pub, etc., but are they considered 'dates' as such? If they are and everyone's saying no they don't go on dates then what do y'all do with your other half?! If you mean meeting a person for the first time (properly, after meeting them on a night out that is) then what exactly else is there to do? I mean you're not both going to meet up and just stand and the side of the road swaying to and fro chatting away to each other are you?

Ye, ye Can someone clear up what Aunty Macbeth said and what do Irish people classify as a date? If you meet someone on a night out and decide to meet up again Id class that as a date, If Irish people dont date then what do they do? whats the difference between going out and a date? To me going out just sounds less formal and cheesey than going out on a date but its the same thing.

Atrocity

meetin up in the pub, maybe going to see a movie. that's as much as I like

Eminem

All i said was i dont like that word dating .Id prefer meeting are shiffting

daiixi

Eminem wrote:

All i said was i dont like that word dating .Id prefer meeting are shiffting

shifting??? that is just odd!

Eminem

Ok you have your opinion and i have mine:)

daiixi

oh yea, I'm not from around this hemisphere.. I meant "what the hell does 'shifting' mean?"

Eminem

It means your not going out with somone but ur shiffting same as meeting them

ergo

daiixi wrote:

oh yea, I'm not from around this hemisphere.. I meant "what the hell does 'shifting' mean?"

*groans*

"shifting" is a term some Irish people use instead of "kissing" or for others "meeting" or in fact "scoring" or.....blah blah

there have been a million threads on this but I can't find any to point you to even in the advanced search section but I can imagine how confusing it would be to someone from another hemisphere...

it does sound ridiculous, I don't use the term anymore myself but did when I was younger, maybe around when I was 18, am now 27, but anyway, that's for another thread
(actually similar to the way Aussies say to "pash" instead of to kiss")

anyway, I wouldn't say the above expressions are interchangable with "dating" because you might go on a few dates before kissing someone or it might never happen. It's true, Irish people don't go on dates like those overseas do, maybe as we get older and as more of us have been away that has started to change. And for me, the cinema is a place I would avoid if I wanted to get to know someone in a date situation, but it is a good place for "snogging" or "making out" or....blah blah...when you're 16 or so :rolleyes:

daiixi

ergo wrote:

*groans*

"shifting" is a term some Irish people use instead of "kissing" or for others "meeting" or in fact "scoring" or.....blah blah

it does sound ridiculous, I don't use the term anymore myself but did when I was younger, maybe around when I was 18, am now 27, but anyway, that's for another thread
(actually similar to the way Aussies say to "pash" instead of to kiss")

anyway, I wouldn't say the above expressions are interchangable with "dating" because you might go on a few dates before kissing someone or it might never happen. It's true, Irish people don't go on dates like those overseas do, maybe as we get older and as more of us have been away that has started to change. And for me, the cinema is a place I would avoid if I wanted to get to know someone in a date situation, but it is a good place for "snogging" or "making out" or....blah blah...when you're 16 or so :rolleyes:

ergh.. it's "snog" not "pash"!!!!!!! It's not the early 1990's anymore!!!!!

I've gone one a few dates with Irish guys since I arrived here...

Either way, dates are good things! "Shifting" still sounds bad!

ergo

daiixi wrote:

ergh.. it's "snog" not "pash"!!!!!!! It's not the early 1990's anymore!!!!!

I've gone one a few dates with Irish guys since I arrived here...

Either way, dates are good things! "Shifting" still sounds bad!

sorry, maybe that should have read Queenslanders and not Aussies, because when I was in Queensland 2 years ago, a girl who was from the sticks used the expression "pash" in everyday speak,

and also my friend "Pat" who pronounced his name with the typically Irish soft "T" so it sounded like "Pash" got quite a bit of slagging off for this

anyway, for me the word "shift" is mid 90's but it's obviously still alive and well here.....

omb0wyn5ehpij9

ergo wrote:

And for me, the cinema is a place I would avoid if I wanted to get to know someone in a date situation, but it is a good place for "snogging" or "making out" or....blah blah...when you're 16 or so :rolleyes:

Last date i went on, i went to the cinema, and had a fantastic time. Granted i did know the girl before going on the date, but we ended up sitting in the car for 3 hours chatting after the cinema.....it felt like about 20 minutes to me

But i dont see anything wrong with the cinema for a date, the film gives you something to talk about after it