The Man With No Arms

finlma

Its probably not very politically correct to talk about it here but the question needs to be asked. Me and the mates were chatting at the weekend about the dude around town with no arms. He always asks people to get money from his pocket and buy him a flaggin of cider and hang it from his stump in a plastic bag.

There are many conflicting stories about how he lost his arm but the one most mentioned is that they were taken off by a tiger when a circus visited Galway years ago.

Does anyone know the real story and has anyone ever had to buy him anything or even worse meet him in the toilet?

TerrorFirmer

There was a guy a few years back who did indeed have his arms taken by a tiger in the circus. Whether or not its the same guy I don't know; it may very well be.

nitroboy

I met him a few times, once in the jacks, and he asked me to tuck in his shirt,what could u say, the other times to light his smoke, he seems like an ok dude.

wet-paint

It's true, yer man had his arms ripped off by a Tiger in a circus out by Dunnes. He said he was trying to pet them, but he was trying to steal their meat for his dogs.

JohnCleary

I'd say he was trying to pet them tbh 'Here tiger tiger tiger'

But yeah the story is true. He got them eaten off by lions/tigers/whatever at the Circus in Terryland a few years ago, poor fella

when i read this thread,i thought it would be about the lad who plays trumpet on shop street.

TerrorFirmer

Deleted User wrote:

when i read this thread,i thought it would be about the lad who plays trumpet on shop street.

Thats exactly what I thought!

finlma

I heard that the circus folk kept their money in with the tigers and he was trying to steal it. The tiger ripped one arm off and when he tried to get that back they ripped off the other. Its amazing how these stories grow arms and legs.

TerrorFirmer

finlma wrote:

The tiger ripped one arm off and when he tried to get that back they ripped off the other.

The above part is supposedly true

However I seriously doubt people would keep money in a cage with a tiger. Sounds like something an 8 year old added to the tale!

Interceptor

Whatever about stroking the tiger, I wonder how he spanks the monkey?

'cptr

j22

Ive seen him about. He once asked a load of school kids to hold onto his cig while he went into the shop and then one of their teachers came over while the kid was holding the cigarette. Very funny.

DRakE

nitroboy wrote:

I met him a few times, once in the jacks, and he asked me to tuck in his shirt,what could u say, the other times to light his smoke, he seems like an ok dude.

How about..

Not on your life will I give you your jollies by putting my hand anywhere near your penis, you parapelegic arse.

Robbo

I do believe the chap is partial to a pint and has gotten into trouble during the inevitable trip to the gents.

finlma

Robbo wrote:

I do believe the chap is partial to a pint and has gotten into trouble during the inevitable trip to the gents.

Often spotted in Padhraics on a Saturday morning.

kc66

A cousin of mine was telling me years ago he was in Padraigs one morning and a guy at the bar with no arms asked him to lift the pint up to his mouth to drink it. My cousins a right messer at the best of times and he held the 3/4 pint up until he had it drank. Was spilling all over him. Id say its the same guy. Only copped it when someone mentioned Padraigs.

po0k

Your cousin will appear on Kirsty's home videos when he gets caught on camera being violated by an overly curious ostrich in Fota Wildlife Park.

And I will win £50

Amazotheamazing

Your cousin is a bastard. Thats not funny, thats just awful. I'm surprised the rest of the bar didn't beat him and throw him in the docks.

alibabba

The guy's name is Martin, he is fro Bohermore, lives with his mother. Both are not very well off. Buy fags and drink rather than spend it on food. When he passed the tiger cage one sunday morning, he saw the lump of meat inside the cage. He reached in, grabbed the lump of meat. Tiger bit off his hand. He then tried to get his arm back, tiger bit off the other arm.

Redhairedguy

alibabba wrote:

When he passed the tiger cage one sunday morning, he saw the lump of meat inside the cage. He reached in, grabbed the lump of meat. Tiger bit off his hand. He then tried to get his arm back, tiger bit off the other arm.

Well that will learn ya! He would be doing that again in a hurry!

galah

He used to be my friend's neighbour up in Bohermore - and asked her/her housemates to do a good few dodgy things (checking the change in his pockets and the like). Seems to be "mostly harmless" though...

poker_face

I'm pretty sure it was a lion that bit his arms off. Anyway this might be another urban myth about the fellah but apparently his job title in thermo king before the accident was a line(lion) feeder.

mr biazzi

i had to give him fags and get him cider up bohemore and put 50 cent in his mouth. I felt my good deed was done that day.
Frustated Man!!

Ruffty^

Yeah I had to help him out with a bag for his bottle of cider before. I wonder what happened to the tiger/lion? Was it killed?

derv

i got cornered one day outside galway shopping centre where he asked me to grab money from his pocket to get him a burger.
i had to say no because all i could think of was him shouting "this guy is attacking me" as i tried to help him. and me getting fcuked over for trying to help.
felt awful bad after it buy hey.......
then was chatting to my mates about it , they told me he asked the to take his instrument (for the want of a better word) out of his pants in the jacks and hold it for him while he pi$$ed in some pub. not a nice situation to be in.:D

as you can imagine they also said no.

aparently he is partial to a few pints

Redhairedguy

poker_face wrote:

apparently his job title in thermo king before the accident was a line(lion) feeder.

That is correct, my Dad knows him from working in thermo King

ljtracey

hey, i used to work in tesco on checkouts 2 years ago (im a man btw), i dont think hes allowed to go to any of the girls tills anymore (sexual allegations??).anyway, i had to help him get the coins from his pocket once, i felt really bad for the guy. i didnt mind doing it but he didnt have enough so i had to keep going deeper and pick up the coppers. <shudder>, anyway, when he came back again (and again), i had to refuse him coz it took so long (u know the queues in tesco!) and i was kinda weirded out. i really hate admitting that coz like everyone was saying, he seems like a nice guy that just got handed a ****ty deal.

Redhairedguy

ljtracey wrote:

i had to help him get the coins from his pocket once, i felt really bad for the guy. i didnt mind doing it but he didnt have enough so i had to keep going deeper and pick up the coppers.

Perchance when you were rummaging through his pockets... did you feel a long hard, torch like item? No? God! Am I the only one?

Anyway, he is a filthy sexual deviant... notorious for asking young people, boys especially to fumble in his pants for change

po0k

If he constantly needs to ask people to root in his pocket for money, you'd think he'd have sorted a way of making it easier. A bum back or money strap or something.

Amazotheamazing

In fairness, he can hardly ask girls to go through his pockets for obvious reasons.

JohnCleary

Amazotheamazing wrote:

In fairness, he can hardly ask girls to go through his pockets for obvious reasons.

In fairness, if I was him, the ONLY people id be asking to go through my pockets is girls

Redhairedguy

JohnCleary wrote:

In fairness, if I was him, the ONLY people id be asking to go through my pockets is girls

That's true! but from what I hear he is as gay as christmas. So it's the lads he's after

cardoor

Martin lost his hands when he put his arm in to pet a Tiger. He was intoxicated at the time. It was night-time. If Martin had put his had through the cage 10 feet to the right or left of where he did; he might have had some chance but he put his hand through the bars at the exact same point where the tigers are fed every day. He is an alcoholic and is usually seen drinking out of a bottle of cider he buys in the cheap foodstore beside Argos. He doesn't always have pockets in his pants. He might have holes for pockets but thats all thats there; holes. Then he will ask a female to get his change out.

Redhairedguy

You seem to know a lot about our more "distinguished" members of Galway public, first Flash, then Knacker Dwarf, now no-armed guy!

Apparantly he was always a bit of a wanker, even before he lost his arms! So says me father anyway!

cardoor

Redhairedguy wrote:

You seem to know a lot about our more "distinguished" members of Galway public, first Flash, then Knacker Dwarf, now no-armed guy!

I'm what u call streetwise. 31 years in Galway City teaches ya a few things. I have met a few "distinguished" people in my days. Galway isn't that big and everybody has a story about themselves. If you spend a week up around the court house you will meet a few more. (been there on jurey duty by the way)

JohnCleary

cardoor wrote:

Redhairedguy wrote:

You seem to know a lot about our more "distinguished" members of Galway public, first Flash, then Knacker Dwarf, now no-armed guy!

I'm what u call streetwise. 31 years in Galway City teaches ya a few things. I have met a few "distinguished" people in my days. Galway isn't that big and everybody has a story about themselves. If you spend a week up around the court house you will meet a few more. (been there on jurey duty by the way)

The courthouse is a great way to kill an hour if your bored... Stroll around inside until you find a room that looks interesting. In you go, sit down the back.. and watch a knacker get sent to prision

Redhairedguy

JohnCleary wrote:

The courthouse is a great way to kill an hour if your bored... Stroll around inside until you find a room that looks interesting. In you go, sit down the back.. and watch a knacker get sent to prision

Screw work! From now on, that's what I'm gonna do with my free time!

JohnCleary

Redhairedguy wrote:

Screw work! From now on, that's what I'm gonna do with my free time!

Don't get me wrong, im not a bum or anything

Just a friend of mine was in court before, so we went in for a look... Before we knew it there was another case (involved knackers) so we stayed for the laugh, before we knew it, 2 hours had passed!

cardoor

An armless man walked into a bar which was empty except for the bartender.

He ordered a drink and when he was served, asked the bartender if he would get the money from his wallet in his pocket, since he has no arms. The bartender obliged him.

He then asked if the bartender would tip the glass to his lips. The bartender did this until the man finished his drink.

He then asked if the bartender would get a hanky from his pocket and wipe the foam from his lips. The bartender did it and commented, “It must be very difficult not to have arms and have to ask someone to do nearly everything for you?”

The man said, "Yes, it is a bit embarrassing at times. By the way, where is the restroom?"

The bartender quickly replied, "The closest one is in the gas station three blocks down the street."

dubhthach

Ruffty^ wrote:

Yeah I had to help him out with a bag for his bottle of cider before. I wonder what happened to the tiger/lion? Was it killed?

No, though i recall there was some nut writing into the advertiser going on that it had tasted human blood and had to be destroyed etc. Of course the fact that Tigers (yes it was a tiger not a lion) are an endangered species put an end to that sorta talk.

fun bus

i think galah is on to something no one else has mentioned-hes a bit sleazy to say the least. i certainly wouldnt let a woman near him to be honest.

Redhairedguy

fun bus wrote:

i think galah is on to something no one else has mentioned-hes a bit sleazy to say the least. i certainly wouldnt let a woman near him to be honest.

Finally... someone understands what I've been pointing out! He is a filthy old queen!

Chewbacca [14-12-2007]

of course he's a deviant...Unless he has a really long tongue, the level of frustration he nurtures would kill a bison.

Chewbacca [14-12-2007]

...ironically, so would a Tiger...

Redhairedguy

Well said Chewie you old bean!

He probably gets a jam jar full of worms to sate his lust....

Plus then the worms get a nourishing meal.

SPLOOGE!!!!

Chewbacca [14-12-2007]

as long as he stops someone in the street who not only has a tin opener, but will actually open his tin of worms.

Redhairedguy

Chewbacca wrote:

as long as he stops someone in the street who not only has a tin opener, but will actually open his tin of worms.

That of course is true!

TerrorFirmer

The thread title sounds like a 50's sci fi movie.

fun bus

explain.........................................

Redhairedguy

HavoK wrote:

The thread title sounds like a 50's sci fi movie.

Heeheehe.... starring Donal Ni Fhlatharta and Ronald Cumbent

A gripping tale of controversy and no armedness

JimmyK

I remember that guy.

I was walking down bohermore road he asked a mate of mine from Australia to get money from his pocket and buy him cigarettes at the filling station.

We had a chat afterwards and my mate asked "how do you think he wipes his arse".

He had a few interesting memories of Galway.

SimpleSam06

Chewbacca wrote:

of course he's a deviant...Unless he has a really long tongue, the level of frustration he nurtures would kill a bison.

The mind boggles :eek: I would go so far as to say we have a new definition of bogglement...