My religion forbids my sexuality

LegacyUser

OK, I consider myslef really religious, pray every day and go to mass(I'm chatolic and 15 yr old), but lately I've been feeling homosexual feelings towards men. I'm even more torn apart because the chatolic church forbids homosexuality and bisexuality. I'm not sure I could live a lie all my life and say I'm straight when I'm not. This is really something that I'm torn apart with: My sexuality or my religion?

munkeehaven

your sexuality. a religion that makes you feel bad about yourself isnt worth hanging on to. excuse my language but f uck that ****, god never said anything about gays being against his will .im straight myself but gave up catholicism a long time ago because its HOMOPHOBIC, MISOGYNISTIC, and all a big lie. why do you think its run by old celibate bitter men??? they just want us to suffer for being alive.WHY SHOULD YOU FEEL GUILTY FOR HOW YOU FEEL?? homosexuality has been around since the dawn of time, and its never going to disappear, its happens with chimpanzees too. some homophobic men a few 1000 years ago decided ''hey why dont we say this is a sin??'' i dont think jesus would have cared if someone was gay or not. or buddha or muhammed. and if they did well then they arent worth believing in, but i do think they wouldnt have cared, see , prejudice is a plague of humans, not enlightened beings. give up making yourself feel guilty. this could be your last life. there is nothing wrong with sex BETWEEN TWO CONSENTUAL ADULTS,, be they man and man , woman and woman, or man and woman. i just get so angry when i hear about things like this. dont make yourself feel bad, just forget about what your religion says, you must remember that any holy words, after a few 1000 yrs get distorted and tainted by particular humans,for their advantage. what you read most likely IS NOT TRUE. turn to philosphy its a much more fulfilling way to fill the gap in your soul.

LegacyUser

We should not be here to merely convert someone from one faith to another (or to no faith!). Please, posters, remember that. Do not believe that you are right and what someone else believe is wrong, and they should be more like you..

Torn Apart Guy, faith is indeed a wonderful thing. Something that can help you a lot in life. There is no need for you to turn away from the God you love and what you believe!

But God is not a solid, definite thing. And God does not necessarily need a proxy, or a "middle-man" to translate his words, his message. There is no need for books, rituals, or blind-faiths. God has no time for this!

Work at your connection with God. You can do this through meditation, prayer, connection with nature, and developing your mind body and spirit - work at your higher intellect and get in touch with your higher self, or your spirit - this is where you truly find God.. If you want to know how I managed to do this, email me: blizzardbeast66@hotmail.com

Do not worry about dogmas, rules, religion or blind faiths too much. They are not always there for your benefit. Take from them the good things - like the message of peace, love, harmony, giving and coming into touch with nature.


P.S. The reason I ask you to email me is because I posted on THIS message board a couple of years ago about how I found an amazing way of life, a technique that changed my life, and people on this board responded very negatively.. didn't want to know! So for fear of attack, I won't post the "answer" to the meaning of life! But I am here for you if you want to email me.

P.P.S. A lot of philosophy is merely intellectual entertainment. It will not give you true enlightenment or REAL happiness! Bear this in mind, it may save you years of playing intellectual games with your mind. Some people spend their life-times doing this, and often end up becoming very mentall ill as a result. Most of the best philosophers dies very unhappy, and ill!

keu

Your really going to feel at home here at boards then
and tbh....i'm suprised that anyone on this island is affected that way by "chatolicism"...i thought we all grew out of that.

but just to clear your conscience.
the words used to interpret "homosexuality" translate better as fornication and uncleanliness, which in spiritual terms has more to do with the "purity of the soul"...like intentions and stuff and nothing to do with sexuality. (see below)

The Greek words "pornea" (often translated "fornication") and akatharsia (often translated "uncleanness") are key terms used to refer to sexual sins in the Christian Scriptures (New Testament).

over time scriptures have been twisted and contorted and really they should not be taken literally.
Which is why Jesus caused so much trouble when he came along, cause he even denounced the scriptures

Jesus and his disciples violated the Hebrew Scriptures' laws regarding ritual uncleanness. For example, they did not wash his hands before eating. In Mark 7:6-23 (copied by the author of Matthew in Matthew 15:3-20) Jesus enunciated the great principle that there is no ceremonial, but only moral and spiritual, uncleanness. He repudiated uncleanness, saying that one is defiled by "the things that come out of his heart, evil thoughts, hatred, murder, etc." That is, one does not become unclean by the actions of his hands. "

6

....in fact he rejected the original commandments and replaced with his own, of which there are only two. (less to remember)
1.- love one another....and
2.- do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
...and thats why they killed him.


so..your religion does not forbid your sexuality, the paedolphile priests and other eegits (lconservative religionsist) just made that all up.

edit: oh and as an afterthought, at 15 it is quite normal to have homosexual/bisexual feeling...believe it or not.

simu

Afaik, the Church accepts homosexuality in a person but forbids them to take part in homosexual acts. So, you can be gay and Catholic as long as you stay chaste.

So, you can relax for a bit. As for the whole faith thing, I won't go in to that. I don't believe in God (I was raised as a Catholic and believed strongly until I was about 13 or so, after that, nada) and I'm a tad biased against the whole faith thing. You'll have to work that out yourself but again, don't worry if you're having doubts or if you're confused - it's perfectly normal for someone your age to question beliefs they have held since childhood.

P.P.S. A lot of philosophy is merely intellectual entertainment. It will not give you true enlightenment or REAL happiness! Bear this in mind, it may save you years of playing intellectual games with your mind. Some people spend their life-times doing this, and often end up becoming very mentall ill as a result. Most of the best philosophers dies very unhappy, and ill!

lol! Philosophy doesn't promise guaranteed enlightenment or happiness - that's kind of the whole point - you start asking questions about things not knowing where these questions will lead you. Some philosophers are fairly happy, others are miserable old sods - there's no overall pattern. As for philosophers dying ill, well it's rare for people to die when they're in tip top condition, no?

Oriel

Sincere apologies if I'm wrong, but from Lokuttara's response, I smell a troll...

keu

yea..does smell trolly

but anywho....Catholic church does not condemn nor say being homo is sin they only say acting upon is, what they mean by that is sex is for married couples only and since only male female can marry...
...legally...
which is something thats being challanged

so..eh..keep your fingers crossed.

yossarin

this may well be a troll ("torn apart guy" seems a bit of a gag), but anyway.

The anti-gay parts of the bible are in the old testament , eg. lev 18, 22, Lev 20: 13, and others.
but that book holds other such gems as shrimp is an abomination , which people seems to be ignoring these days.

the message seems to be that you can pick and choose which parts of the religion you like.

Phil_321

Originally posted by Torn apart guy
I'm even more torn apart because the chatolic church forbids homosexuality and bisexuality. I'm not sure I could live a lie all my life and say I'm straight when I'm not. This is really something that I'm torn apart with: My sexuality or my religion?

Why not become a priest? Seems you'd fit right in.

Gordon

Phil_321 - that's not helpful here.

For the life of me I can't find a religion board, there are millions of boards on boards.ie and no Catholicism board.

Original poster, to be honest, why not talk to your priest if you are so religious? Also, would you like this thread moved to the LGB board instead?

Boston

Faith sudden be about sexuality, it should be about you an your god. Remember all religions are just middle men. Do you feel god will hate you and dis own you because of this.

BuffyBot

OK, I consider myslef really religious, pray every day and go to mass(I'm chatolic and 15 yr old)

Torn apart guy - it's good that you have your faith. Sometimes it good to have stuff to hold on to in a really strange world.

but lately I've been feeling homosexual feelings towards men. I'm even more torn apart because the chatolic church forbids homosexuality and bisexuality.

As someone else said, it isn't forbidden, just the acts. I don't believe in god, but I respect others who do. However, if I did, I suspect I would be dubious about taking something at face value that was written down a long, long time ago and been through many translations. Ask yourself, do you think God - who created you, and everything about you - would make you "faulty"? I think that is the question you need to resolve for yourself

I'm not sure I could live a lie all my life and say I'm straight when I'm not. This is really something that I'm torn apart with: My sexuality or my religion?

I think the second part of that is what you need to resolve first, then work on the first

luckat

It depends on what you think of as your religion. Most married Catholics nowadays use contraception, and consider it an honourable, responsible and correct thing to do.

Yet just 20 years ago this was absolutely a no-no. Contraception and divorce would put you outside the aegis of the Catholic Church.

Sexual love is the important thing, Torn. If your sexuality is an expression of love, not exploitation of others, then I can't see what's unchristian about it.

(Incidentally, what's the ad for Scientology doing on the Boards?)

cartman

sure arnt the priest bangin the alter boys,
so that means there homo too,
not to worry, pick ur sexuality, tbh you have no choice... its feeling, it wont go away

David-[RLD]-

You have homosexual feelings. So? They're your feelings, nobody elses. Nobody can tell you to be gay or straight except yourself. If you consider yourself to be religious, then continue being religious. Just because Catholicism frowns upon homosexuality doesn't mean you can't stop doing the things you do already. I know my Parish priest has no problem with anyone who is gay or bi, and I can tell that he hates homophobes.

So, all in all, stay faithful to your religion except when it comes to sexuality, because that's a Catholic belief that I disagree with; hating homosexuality; even though I'm Catholic myself.

ozt9vdujny3srf

Jaypers your 15, being 15 is freakin confusing.

Don't make any big choices as to what your sexuality is yet.

seamus

Maybe it's time to redefine what religion means to you. It's something you will do anyway over the next fews years. Religion isn't black and white. It's not about making a pact with any one institution to follow their beliefs and worship by their side, rather it's how you define your personal relationship with your God. Whether that involves personal sacrifice and suffering, or simply going about your business, but making an effort to better yourself and make a good contribution to the world, is totally up to you.
Now matter how devout someone is to Catholicism, it's impossible to follow the teachings and writing exactly. The contradict eachother disgustingly. Even the Ten Commandments that Moses brought down from Mount Sinai the second time bear little resemblence to the ten commandments that the church follows.

Even the Bible says specifically that the Church and the Pope are fallible. If you believe something is the right thing to do, and your conscience tells you 100% that it will bring you closer to your God, then you have authority to follow it, even if the Church disagrees. At least something similar to that. Do a search for a nun who works as a religious outlet for AIDS-stricken homosexuals.

Basically what I'm saying is that the only person who can define your religion is your God. What authority do priests or the pope have? Authority handed down through the ages from other similarly non-qualified people.

Why would your God specifically make something wrong, then condemn you to a lifetime of doing it against his will? If you're Catholic, then your God is fair, good and forgiving. It's a nice contradiction.

LegacyUser

Originally posted by Gordon
Phil_321 - that's not helpful here.

For the life of me I can't find a religion board, there are millions of boards on boards.ie and no Catholicism board.

Original poster, to be honest, why not talk to your priest if you are so religious? Also, would you like this thread moved to the LGB board instead?

I supppose, move it to the LGB board, there might be more help and adivce there.

BTW, thanks for the advice so far everyone.

Doodee

I agree with seamus.
religion to alot of people has been turned into an institution, rather than a persons beliefs.
My granmother used to make my sisters and I goto church every sunday and any other holy days.
We went alot of the time for we went for the treat we recieved afterwards rather than for the spiritual enlightenment. It became a case of "I've gone to mass so im following the rules and going to heaven".
My beliefs about religion have always been different to my granmothers. She believes in following a code laid down by the bible and upheld by the priests and pop. I prefer to think of god as someone who listens when i talk to him, and rather than respond directly, that i will learn myself what i am looking for.
That sounds kind of complicated to me now, but all it really means is that if i get angry and question my beliefs, the talking to myself eventually calms me down and allows me to think rationally again.

I think your relationship with god is your own, and if you dont believe in him then thats not a problem. Different folks different strokes.

be yourself and dont worry about what others will say.

Doodee

for some reason my last post is making me confused

keu

for some reason my last post is making me confused

?? ...thought it was honest and straight to the point. Would think most people think the same way or come to the same conclusion with regard to inherited religious beliefs. We all eventually figure it out.

"an institution is the elongated shadow of a man, I will never walk in any mans shadow as long as I stand in the light of god"

makes sense.?

Doodee

yea, sums it up perfectly.
cheers

Elessar

cough**TROLL**cough

I cant believe you're all falling for it. Trust me NO 15 year old would post something like that even if he knew he was gay. He's too young to be telling people, even though he may be anonymous, he's even too young to be telling himself.

keu

cough**TROLL**cough

well, its not like the thought hadnt occured, but who is to say there isnt a 15 year old thinking about their sexuality and lets face it, regardless of what you believe, inherited beliefs get very stuck in the subconscious and lead to a lot of emotional crap when dealing with these kind of issues.

seamus

Originally posted by Elessar
cough**TROLL**cough

I cant believe you're all falling for it. Trust me NO 15 year old would post something like that even if he knew he was gay. He's too young to be telling people, even though he may be anonymous, he's even too young to be telling himself.

I have no doubt at all that it's a troll, but I also have no doubt that is a very real question for quite a few people. Why not impart advice?

Boston

Originally posted by Elessar
cough**TROLL**cough

Really could you please piss off. Every other thread here gets accused of being a troll. These are serious issues for allot of people, as seamus said, the fact that it's posted on PI is nearly proof enough its a troll, but we say on the chance that it's not that we will help. We don't need you informing us what is and is not a troll. All 15 year old think about there sexuality, some 15 year olds are religious, especially here, so its not insane to think that there is one worried about this. Theres definitely alot of older people who are. if you can't help why don't you sit down and shut the **** up. This definitely should be moved to LGB, people there have at least enough cop on not to state the bloody ****ing obvious.

memphis

Your 15 for christ sake (no pun intended). I'm 23 and still confused about my sexuality.

Its not uncomman for a guy at your age to question his sexuality. Maybe you are bi or gay. But you don't need to put a tag on yourself right away. Your young, you still have a life to live. Follow your heart and that should apply to religion too.

So, you say you have feelings for other men, ahve you acted on this or is it all just a fantasy?

Donno if I'll be of any help, but if you wanna PM me feel free to do so.

On the other hand, as regard to religion, faith is always a good thing to have. I'm a born catholic, and live in a very religish household, but unknown to my family I haven't been to church in weeks. This is my choice. If yo are gay or bi, you should not put your religion on the back boiler, if its an important part of your life continue yor faith. So what if the church condemns homosexuality. You have to remember that the Catholic church is run by a very elderly man, with very old beliefs.

Changes will come in time.

Personally, I don't go to church, but I still consider myself to have faith. I don't believe that I have to attend a weekly service to say I'm religous. I'm the judge of my religion, I choice what right and wrong. I choose how to live my live, I choose who I get sexually involved with, i choose how to be in harmony with the world, etc. Perhaps this is the religion you should follow.

To sum up, your young, you have alot of question that need answering, only you can discover the answers. its all part of growing up. Enjoy life, and don't be running yourself down.

Elessar

Really could you please piss off. Every other thread here gets accused of being a troll. These are serious issues for allot of people, as seamus said, the fact that it's posted on PI is nearly proof enough its a troll, but we say on the chance that it's not that we will help. We don't need you informing us what is and is not a troll. All 15 year old think about there sexuality, some 15 year olds are religious, especially here, so its not insane to think that there is one worried about this. Theres definitely alot of older people who are. if you can't help why don't you sit down and shut the **** up. This definitely should be moved to LGB, people there have at least enough cop on not to state the bloody ****ing obvious.

*sigh*

In case you were too dense to see through the thick perspex of your own nerd glasses, I made a valid point. If he is 15 he is still too young to even admit it to himself, never mind an internet board. And reading some of the replies to this thread, it's clear that not everyone knows he's a joker. This thread really belongs in the gay/bi forum. So can you please keep your retarded assumptions to yourself and read other people's posts before you start ranting on with obscene language.

LegacyUser

Ok, I am 15 and a lot of you are saying i shouldn't tag myself right away, but if you really read the first message I said I was having homo feelings, not saying I was gay, and I'm just worried that I'd be living a life of sin if I did turn out gay, that's all I really meant.

banquo

looks, its fine: you can do both.


most of the anti-gay writings in the Bible are from teh book of Leviticus. Leviticus includes other such gems:

-you cant plant two different crops side by side
-you cant touch pigskin (so american football si out of hte question)

its in hte New TEstamant, and in no way intwined with the myths of christ so its totally ok to just sort of ignore the book of Leviticus. most people do...

seamus

Originally posted by Torn apart guy
Ok, I am 15 and a lot of you are saying i shouldn't tag myself right away, but if you really read the first message I said I was having homo feelings, not saying I was gay, and I'm just worried that I'd be living a life of sin if I did turn out gay, that's all I really meant.

That's a very different issue. But my point still stands - If you believe in your God, then why would he create you as something that would anger him?

That would be like a programmer writing a program that doesn't work the way he wants it to....