Most wanted invention

luckat

What's your most wanted invention? Mine is voice recognition software that actually recognises what people are saying without having been trained.

You'd make millions from this invention; every journalist in the world would buy it, and it would instantly put shorthand note-takers in parliaments, intergovernmental meetings, etc out of business.

I'd also like something that would sop up the foggy wet from car windows, outside and in, so you don't get into a dank car and then have to get out and wipe all the windows.

Doctor J

I think a device which would clean one's genitals and rectal area more efficiently than bog roll and/or bidet would be good. It'd have to be gentle, but still get things spic and span down there.

And it would be made in a factory staffed by recently axed shorthand note-takers.

herbie747

A Holodeck (Star Trek).

"Voice recognition software" Talk about lack of imagination

sionnach

a personal teleportation device

woosaysdan

i want the teleporter thingie homer simpson had where he put 1 beside the sofa and another in front of the toilet!!!:D

sionnach

well i was thinking more along the lines of being able to travel instantly to paris, new york etc. but if all you want is the toilet...well its up to you

Mossy Monk

a real working magic wand which only i would have. with one of those things i could have anything i wanted

TheSonOfBattles

Faster than lightspeed drive. That or a lightsaber.

Can you tell i'm a star wars fan?

Beëlzebooze

programmable woman (i.e seven of nine)

Squall

Originally posted by TheSonOfBattles
Faster than lightspeed drive. That or a lightsaber.

I second that

GreenHell

Hologram pants, there such a drag to put on in the morning.

Sarky

It would certainly thin out the masses of Star Wars Uber-fans.

MrBigglesworth

Something that shaves you in a second without unbearable pain.

sionnach

Originally posted by GreenHell
Hologram pants, there such a drag to put on in the morning.

then ud b embarassed the whole time by ppl goin around with mini EMP's knocking out ur holopants

Faust

Originally posted by sionnach
then ud b embarassed the whole time by ppl goin around with mini EMP's knocking out ur holopants

LOL

I'd say some type of p2p program that does'nt suck! And eh Some type of floating skateboard dealy ala back to the future! Coz that thing was sweet!

sionnach

Originally posted by Faust
LOL

I'd say some type of p2p program that does'nt suck!

be more imaginative!! ud prefer that to, say, a full virtual reality world where u can be whatever u want to b and do whatever u want to do?

Dr. Dre

What about the classic x-ray specs

Robbo

Originally posted by Dr. Dre
What about the classic x-ray specs

So you can ogle some saucy clavicles?

I'd have to put a retractable roof on the entire NUI,G campus and the path from my house to college.

sionnach

im sure that, like all men, dre would never exploit them to ogle women Id say he'd only use them for the good of mankind, being a typical male who respects females privacy

gucci

the mobile fone that hasnt annoying ringtones that young tits keep flicking thru!!or without that beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep-beep loud annoying ringtone for messages recieved-so in other words another brand of fone to be invented other than nokia that every kid wants

blondie83

What's your most wanted invention? Mine is voice recognition software that actually recognises what people are saying without having been trained.

Thats not going to happen for a while I'm afraid:( . Hiberno-English is composed of about 72 different phonemes (the different sounds that make up words), and each human has a unique way of saying each of them - sort of like a "voice print". When I say unique, I mean uses the same frequencies, pitch ect when they speak.

VR software works by first having the person read a passage (the training), so that they can create a time varying signal for that person, for each phoneme in the language. The signal is then converted from analogue to digital, and comes out as a string of binary digits. These 72 strings of binary digits(one for each phoneme) are stored in a "library" for the person - the training is then complete

Then, when the VR software is in action, it reads in what the person is saying, and again converts the signal from analogue to digital. After that its simply a method of comparing this new string of binary digits, with the other string in the library for that person, to see what phoneme they actually said.

So I'm afraid the training is kinda neccessary for the time being anyway. Unless someone can come up with some amazing software package that can distinguish between everyones seperate accents, and voice pitch and everything, just to isolate each particular phoneme. Prob won't happen for a good while though:p

PS sorry if I bored everyone, it's just that I did a project on this last year, and found it really interesting

dod

A machine that allows you to create your own dreams.

TheSonOfBattles

Originally posted by blondie83
Thats not going to happen for a while I'm afraid:( . Hiberno-English is composed of about 72 different phonemes (the different sounds that make up words), and each human has a unique way of saying each of them - sort of like a "voice print". When I say unique, I mean uses the same frequencies, pitch ect when they speak.

VR software works by first having the person read a passage (the training), so that they can create a time varying signal for that person, for each phoneme in the language. The signal is then converted from analogue to digital, and comes out as a string of binary digits. These 72 strings of binary digits(one for each phoneme) are stored in a "library" for the person - the training is then complete

Then, when the VR software is in action, it reads in what the person is saying, and again converts the signal from analogue to digital. After that its simply a method of comparing this new string of binary digits, with the other string in the library for that person, to see what phoneme they actually said.

So I'm afraid the training is kinda neccessary for the time being anyway. Unless someone can come up with some amazing software package that can distinguish between everyones seperate accents, and voice pitch and everything, just to isolate each particular phoneme. Prob won't happen for a good while though:p

PS sorry if I bored everyone, it's just that I did a project on this last year, and found it really interesting

You sure your a blonde?

vibe666

i'd like someone to ressurect virtual reality and do a proper job of making all the decent FPS games work well with it.

i don't think i'm asking too much either.

5-6 years ago it was looking promising, and video technology and miniturisation has come opn in leaps and bounds. it should be feasable to make a decent headset that's comfortable and light to wear with hi res/refresh displays and 3D spatial audio for total immerison. also bring back the VR glove, but make it like tom cruises one in Minority Report and you're set. maybe even have a carbine sized gun to hold so that even though you can't see the real thing cos of the headset, the game draws it wherever you point it and tracks its position in relation to where you are so it feels like you're moving it around in the game. a bit of recoil on it wouldn't go amiss either (ala time crisis).

imagine Half-Life 2 with one of those puppies.

ooh, and a second thought, how about a t-shirt sized vest with mini rumblepacks all over it so you can 'feel' when and where you get hit. maybe something for your legs in case there are some nasty little leg humpers that'll bite you low down where you can't see them.

damn i wish i worked for a gaming company and could convince them to do this. i'd never leave home!

now that'd get some fecking broadband sold. :ninja::ninja::ninja::ninja::ninja:

luckat

blonde, thanks for the explanation. Maybe someone will come up with some magic workaround. After all, *we're* able to understand each other.

Oh, wait...

Meanwhile, I'll just keep typing up those interview notes; I'm on track 45 of 169 now.

The Beer Baron

1. A pain switch for computers- so when they give you all this crap about errors and illegal operations you can just press the red button that inflicts pain on it.
Until we invent such a thing we will all be slaves to computers instead of the other way around.

2. A Blackout recorder, a device that records everything you done the previous night so, if you're feeling masocistic, can watch the following night rather than hear it 2nd hand. Can also be used to record cool inpirations and ideas one gets whilst under the influence of thc whereby you're too ****ed and/or lazy to write them down.

3. Omnigoogle- a cerebral search engine everywhere you go, now you can win every argument, or, if you're pissed off because you can't think of the name of an actor, movie, book, band, or something else "it's on the tip of my tongue- John sometihng!"- just load up Omnigoogle and you can finally forget about it instead of lying up all night trying to think of it.

4. Song in your head cancellation device. Does exactly what it says in the tin, a device that connects via electrodes to your skull, not only can it get rid of that annoying song in your head but can be used to cancel out all songs heard in shopping centrs, taxis and anywhere else where nacent chart music attempts to drive you insane.

5. Robot butlers- I mean c'mawn, it's 2004- they lied to us. Lousey science fiction!
I want a robot butler who'll clean my house, get my beer and cook my dinner. I mean I have a girlfriend but she isn't the best at that sorta thing.

6. Robotic retail systems.
Instead of, for example, going to the 24 hour Statoil and dealing with that grumpy bitch who won't sell you wine @ 4pm and trying to stop yourself from breaking your **** laughing and the hell of it all- simply use the touchscreen window- press the nachos icon followed by the number, hit the wine bottle followed by number...etc, etc.

7. Robotic barstaff would also be a great idea- no more waiting forever for your pint, or having them forget, or copping an attitude- press the button and voila- a perfect pint of Guinness everytime.

8. Shops for people like me.
For example, instead of the labyrinthine ailes of Tescos and Dunnes, all supermarkets are in one straight line. Instead of flourescent light- they're dimly lit so as not to hurt my ears, and instead of annoying music blaring and screaming brats there's dub reggae and lots of people with dreadlocks.

9. Powdered booze.
Feel like a cocktail? Just add water and hey presto! Instant bloody mary, or just vodka on its own- feel like some champagne? Just add water.

10. Government by remote control.
Much like those, "vote now" TV shows- a system where a government can be voted in and out via the phone, internet or SKy Digital- don't like their new policy- just hit your remote control.

AL][EN

Originally posted by luckat
What's your most wanted invention? Mine is voice recognition software that actually recognises what people are saying without having been trained.

You'd make millions from this invention; every journalist in the world would buy it, and it would instantly put shorthand note-takers in parliaments, intergovernmental meetings, etc out of business.

/geek

i used to work for IBM they have had this technology out for years its only recently that its devloped advanced enough to do what you said.

check it out Here And IBM did make millions out of it. supporting it is a bastid its not fun when it breaks.

/geek

personally id like to see a proper VR system made for playing games, as in proper real time virtual reality games we've seen in movies where is ACTUALLY looks real not the crappy "lawnmower man" graphics we have out now. imagine playing quake or CS or an RPG that looks so real you couldnt tell the difference between it and real life.

rainbow kirby

Intelligent monkey butler.

The Beer Baron

How many intelligent monkey butlers?

feylya

One at first but it'll train more....

I've always wanted a watch that would stop time for everyone but me.

Capt'n Midnight

Originally posted by The Beer Baron

1. A pain switch for computers-
DON'T blame the computer - BLAME THE PROGRAMMERS - send them the pain :evil:

4. Song in your head cancellation device.
Needed
6. Robotic retail systems.
you mean a vending machine without a huge markup

7. Robotic barstaff would also be a great idea
wot' send barmaids into room 101 - stop right there bud.

9. Powdered booze.
This exists ! - can't find the name

Capt'n Midnight

Originally posted by blondie83
Thats not going to happen for a while I'm afraid:( . Hiberno-English is composed of about 72 different phonemes (the different sounds that make up words), and each human has a unique way of saying each of them - sort of like a "voice print". When I say unique, I mean uses the same frequencies, pitch ect when they speak.

Be much handier if we spoke a phonetic language like spanish or italian - so what we really need is a sleep learning system that works..

blondie83

Be much handier if we spoke a phonetic language like spanish or italian - so what we really need is a sleep learning system that works..

Thats true, Hiberno English is pretty much the worst cos we have more phonemes then any other dialect. England English has about 35, and I think French has 43 or so. I was trying to figure out why this was, but the best I could come up with was that maybe a lot of English words got ammalgamated into Irish words, and made up new words, or old words with new pronounciations. :dunno:

Ajnag

I wanna big robot like a gundam or eva, only Id like them to be the size Jupiter as Ive got issues with certain solar systems.I hate weapons research and all, but if someone starts reseaching 40ft robots Im sold, non-existant soul and all.

rymus

a weather machine.. something I can keep in my back pocket so when I go outside in the morning to take the cover off my bike I can set it to sunshine and when I get home at night to rain. Ohhh to be able to control the elements. I know after a week I'd have it set on sunshine constantly and then probably loose the bloody thing.

Agent Smith

a pill that turns a woman on and makes them lust after the nearest man possiable.

i.e me

Carbiens

beepers on EVERYTHING. from your keys to your phone to the remote control to your lighter,

you know all the **** you lose every during the course of the day, and spend 20 mins trying to find it and then when you find it its like, oh ya thats where i put it, why didnt i think of that 19 ****ING MINUTES AGO!!!

but thats just me.

Faust

Originally posted by agent smith
a pill that turns a woman on and makes them lust after the nearest man possiable.

i.e me

Some type of rape drug then...

I am MAN

What id like....

"The foreskin dg3000"

A penis implant which has different modes for her and this switch that has PREGNANCY ON/OFF over it, I think that would be pretty cool. Or maybe just a female PREGNANCY ON/OFF switch.

sceptre

Originally posted by blondie83
PS sorry if I bored everyone, it's just that I did a project on this last year, and found it really interesting

Interesting post, thanks for that.

Capt'n Midnight

blondie83 wrote:

Thats true, Hiberno English is pretty much the worst cos we have more phonemes then any other dialect. England English has about 35, and I think French has 43 or so. I was trying to figure out why this was, but the best I could come up with was that maybe a lot of English words got ammalgamated into Irish words, and made up new words, or old words with new pronounciations. :dunno:

How many in hiberno english ??

AFAIK there are about 140 used by humans and one of the Scandanavian languages gets to about 60 while the san bushmen use up to 120 ....

Tusky

A shotgun that fires toasters...

Sleepy

Hmmm, a Mrs Sleepy would be nice...

Or if we're just talking about electronics, it'd have to be a holodeck/VR that's indestinguishable from real life until you call up the control panel.

CathyMoran

A device that stops you putting your foot in your mouth (or as in my case both feet) - could have done with that today...call it a "diplomacy/tact switch"

pat kenny

Knock-out nuke, a bomb on the scale of a nuke that only knocks people out.Drop one on a city and knock everyone out stone cold.Then just move in your troops.

blondie83

Capt'n Midnight wrote:

How many in hiberno english ??

AFAIK there are about 140 used by humans and one of the Scandanavian languages gets to about 60 while the san bushmen use up to 120 ....

120 phonemes? That would be interesting to listen to! Hiberno English has 72 phonemes which is a lot more than most. (Just in case you're worrying, I have this from a very reliable college lecturer who does a lot of research in this field!) :cool:

Musashi

Death Ray built into all PCs, on a majority vote , annoying muppets get deaded to Death in the Head like!No more flame wars majority rule turns all forums into "Battle Royale" with the voting pacts of "Big Brother" thrown in.

bus77

pat kenny wrote:

Knock-out nuke, a bomb on the scale of a nuke that only knocks people out.Drop one on a city and knock everyone out stone cold.Then just move in your troops.

gota amputate their arms so they cant attack your troops when they wake up

then put them to work entertaining your nation. Football players.

woosaysdan

id love a space ship!!!

Wacker

A device that maks the Amish break-dance against their will. For some reason....

fragile

The Beer Baron wrote:

1. A pain switch for computers- so when they give you all this crap about errors and illegal operations you can just press the red button that inflicts pain on it.
Until we invent such a thing we will all be slaves to computers instead of the other way around.

or just run Linux :-)

2. A Blackout recorder, a device that records everything you done the previous night so, if you're feeling masocistic, can watch the following night rather than hear it 2nd hand. Can also be used to record cool inpirations and ideas one gets whilst under the influence of thc whereby you're too ****ed and/or lazy to write them down.

Why would you want to remember?

3. Omnigoogle- a cerebral search engine everywhere you go, now you can win every argument, or, if you're pissed off because you can't think of the name of an actor, movie, book, band, or something else "it's on the tip of my tongue- John sometihng!"- just load up Omnigoogle and you can finally forget about it instead of lying up all night trying to think of it.

you mean like a google search through WAP or GPRS on your mobile phone!

4. Song in your head cancellation device. Does exactly what it says in the tin, a device that connects via electrodes to your skull, not only can it get rid of that annoying song in your head but can be used to cancel out all songs heard in shopping centrs, taxis and anywhere else where nacent chart music attempts to drive you insane.

10 mins of Sepultura with the volume way up

5. Robot butlers- I mean c'mawn, it's 2004- they lied to us. Lousey science fiction!
I want a robot butler who'll clean my house, get my beer and cook my dinner. I mean I have a girlfriend but she isn't the best at that sorta thing.

This one I agree with..

6. Robotic retail systems.
Instead of, for example, going to the 24 hour Statoil and dealing with that grumpy bitch who won't sell you wine @ 4pm and trying to stop yourself from breaking your **** laughing and the hell of it all- simply use the touchscreen window- press the nachos icon followed by the number, hit the wine bottle followed by number...etc, etc.

but at least the bitch can be persuaded to sell you wine, if its automated it will be programmed not to sell wine after hours,and there is no arguing with a machine!

7. Robotic barstaff would also be a great idea- no more waiting forever for your pint, or having them forget, or copping an attitude- press the button and voila- a perfect pint of Guinness everytime.

again, try convincing a robot that you just want one more for the road at 1:00AM!

8. Shops for people like me.
For example, instead of the labyrinthine ailes of Tescos and Dunnes, all supermarkets are in one straight line. Instead of flourescent light- they're dimly lit so as not to hurt my ears, and instead of annoying music blaring and screaming brats there's dub reggae and lots of people with dreadlocks.

http://www.tesco.ie/ - order online from the comfort of your own home with dim lighting and reggae music playing in the background :-)

9. Powdered booze.
Feel like a cocktail? Just add water and hey presto! Instant bloody mary, or just vodka on its own- feel like some champagne? Just add water.

I fail to see any advantage this would offer!

10. Government by remote control.
Much like those, "vote now" TV shows- a system where a government can be voted in and out via the phone, internet or SKy Digital- don't like their new policy- just hit your remote control.

No comment.

As for me, all I want is snow covered mountains in Ireland so I dont have to pay for expensive holidays abroad to go snowboarding..