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Most useless thing ever

  • 13-01-2018 1:57am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,012 ✭✭✭


    Whats the most useless thing ever invented, for me I think it's toilet wipes, for fecks sake if you cant wipe yer arsé in your adult years there's a problem that needs to be addressed

    whats yours

    21/25



«1

Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,124 ✭✭✭jonon9


    The Irish Judicial system.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,509 ✭✭✭VW 1


    I'll go old school and say, tits on a nun?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,460 ✭✭✭Barry Badrinath


    7 minute abs.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,555 ✭✭✭Roger Hassenforder


    'Responsive site'


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,231 ✭✭✭Jim Bob Scratcher


    Donald Trump


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,124 ✭✭✭jonon9


    Decking. The amount of times iv nearly slipped and smash my face repairing people's decking. Fecking useless things.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,219 ✭✭✭✭Nekarsulm


    "Persona" contraception kit.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,907 ✭✭✭Stephen15


    jonon9 wrote: »
    Decking. The amount of times iv nearly slipped and smash my face repairing people's decking. Fecking useless things.

    You wouldn't be saying that if ya got a payout


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 727 ✭✭✭Morpork


    7 minute abs.

    It was great until they invented 6 minute abs.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,555 ✭✭✭Roger Hassenforder


    jonon9 wrote: »
    Decking. The amount of times iv nearly slipped and smash my face repairing people's decking. Fecking useless things.

    Rats love it though


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,253 ✭✭✭Stonedpilot


    Scented toilet paper
    Leo Varadkar


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 83,416 ✭✭✭✭Atlantic Dawn
    M


    Dpf filters on diesel cars in absolute fooking complete ****ehole countries like Ireland that don't actually measure any Nox emissions whatsoever at NCT time. The Green Party should be hung high for crimes against humanity, joke of an organisation recommending wood burning stoves in built up areas too, they are up there with the Nazis.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,124 ✭✭✭jonon9


    Stephen15 wrote: »
    You wouldn't be saying that if ya got a payout

    Depends, Im not a compo rat.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,140 ✭✭✭James Bond Junior


    Enda Kenny. The Catholic church. Donald Trump. Pro lifers. Any other edgy things I can suggest?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 619 ✭✭✭NinetyTwoTeam


    Cigarette filters. Yeah, that'll stop the cancer.

    Headphones that cost less then a tenner. Music will be inaudible on the street and either one of 2 things is guaranteed to happen: one earbud completely dies or the wire near the plug makes a crackly sound when it is moved. Usually after about a week of use.

    The corner on a packet of ham that says 'open here', you pull it and all that happens is the little corner bit rips off and the packet still ain't open. And they say resealable sometimes but never are.

    The worst though is the ding! sound a non digital microwave timer makes when it finishes cooking. Why do we need this to happen when the timer gets to zero, the frigging thing shuts off at that point anyway so there's no danger of overcooking, and I don't think I've ever been more than a meter or so away anytime I'm nuking something, it's not like I'm gonna forget about it and it will get cold, and even if it did, the whole point of the thing is it can heat stuff back up quickly. I doubt most people even cook things to exact time increments. Plus I don't need an alarm to notify everyone in the house that I'm stuffing my fat face at 2 am.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,702 ✭✭✭fonecrusher1


    Dublin


  • Registered Users Posts: 789 ✭✭✭Beanntraigheach


    Penicillin


  • Registered Users Posts: 272 ✭✭muppetshow1451


    European union


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,523 ✭✭✭the_pen_turner


    I have to agree with 92 . it has to be resalable packets. a right pain to open sometimes and then zero ability to reseal. how does it get past the design stage. completely useless


  • Registered Users Posts: 118 ✭✭LarryGraham


    Neoliberalism. Third/fourth (not sure what ordinal number it's on now) feminism.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,219 ✭✭✭✭Nekarsulm


    92, microwaves go "ding" because they are often out in the utility room (in case they give you cancer!),
    And the most useless packaging has to be the type of plastic that dry pasta comes in.
    No matter how you open the bag, it tears down the side spilling penne everywhere.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,253 ✭✭✭Stonedpilot


    Enda Kenny. The Catholic church. Donald Trump. Pro lifers. Any other edgy things I can suggest?

    A edgy suggestion.

    Pro (abortion) death before birthers?.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,891 ✭✭✭SlowBlowin


    The wife's navigation/map reading skills


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 619 ✭✭✭NinetyTwoTeam


    Neoliberalism. Third/fourth (not sure what ordinal number it's on now) feminism.

    They're not as bad as people who have to ruin fun threads with political vomit that is a million miles away from the spirit of the thread. Talk about useless.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 619 ✭✭✭NinetyTwoTeam


    Nekarsulm wrote: »
    92, microwaves go "ding" because they are often out in the utility room (in case they give you cancer!),
    And the most useless packaging has to be the type of plastic that dry pasta comes in.
    No matter how you open the bag, it tears down the side spilling penne everywhere.

    Sorry but I'd say 90% of all Irish households have the microwave in the kitchen and most don't even have a utility room. And any radiation from a microwave is so miniscule it's been largely accepted there is no danger at all to be near it when operating.

    We do not need the ding. End of.


  • Registered Users Posts: 272 ✭✭muppetshow1451


    Sorry but I'd say 90% of all Irish households have the microwave in the kitchen and most don't even have a utility room. And any radiation from a microwave is so miniscule it's been largely accepted there is no danger at all to be near it when operating.

    We do not need the ding. End of.

    Popcorn:D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 619 ✭✭✭NinetyTwoTeam


    Popcorn:D

    No way, for popcorn you have to stand at the ready to switch the thing off as soon as the popping slows down. Otherwise you get burnt popcorn which is like the blue waffle of foods.


  • Registered Users Posts: 272 ✭✭muppetshow1451


    No way, for popcorn you have to stand at the ready to switch the thing off as soon as the popping slows down. Otherwise you get burnt popcorn which is like the blue waffle of foods.

    its all about timing and years of experience:D


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,214 ✭✭✭✭Donald Trump


    Donald Trump

    Fuck you too


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,522 ✭✭✭con___manx1


    jonon9 wrote: »
    The Irish Judicial system.

    Its an absolute sham. The transport system is also a sham.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,522 ✭✭✭con___manx1


    Heated toilet seats


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,450 ✭✭✭✭kneemos


    Was buying a motorbike about ten years ago or so,yer man goes into salesman of the month mode with extras such as boots,gloves,helmet etc.
    Anyway I buy a few bits and just as I was gathering up and heading for the door he says how about an ashtray? I says no thanks sure I don't even smoke.


  • Registered Users Posts: 246 ✭✭17togo


    3 pages in a nobody has said "the wife"!? :-D

    *looking over shoulder*

    Neither will I, she's amazing!!!!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,952 ✭✭✭✭Stoner


    Electric car seats, slow and needles expense in a car,
    They get good when then hold and remember a programmable position but useless up to that.

    Microwave dings are necessary
    Microwave popcorn is very bad for you anyway


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,359 ✭✭✭stampydmonkey


    The office computer network...f****n useless.. . Followed extremely closely by the IT dept responsible for it.

    Yet to come across a company with a decent one.


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,918 ✭✭✭gifted


    Lord Mayors....pure and utter expensive ****e...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,275 ✭✭✭Your Face


    About 20% of the people in my company.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,450 ✭✭✭✭kneemos


    Stoner wrote: »
    Electric car seats, slow and needles expense in a car,
    They get good when then hold and remember a programmableo position but useless up to that.

    Microwave dings are necessary
    Microwave popcorn is very bad for you anyway


    Electric everything in a car is pointless apart from windows. Doors in particular are pure ridiculous.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,253 ✭✭✭ouxbbkqtswdfaw


    VW 1 wrote:
    I'll go old school and say, tits on a nun?


    Why, are you so insulting?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,060 ✭✭✭Sue Pa Key Pa


    Irish translations on State documents


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,408 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    Cigarette filters. Yeah, that'll stop the cancer.

    Headphones that cost less then a tenner. Music will be inaudible on the street and either one of 2 things is guaranteed to happen: one earbud completely dies or the wire near the plug makes a crackly sound when it is moved. Usually after about a week of use.

    The corner on a packet of ham that says 'open here', you pull it and all that happens is the little corner bit rips off and the packet still ain't open. And they say resealable sometimes but never are.

    The worst though is the ding! sound a non digital microwave timer makes when it finishes cooking. Why do we need this to happen when the timer gets to zero, the frigging thing shuts off at that point anyway so there's no danger of overcooking, and I don't think I've ever been more than a meter or so away anytime I'm nuking something, it's not like I'm gonna forget about it and it will get cold, and even if it did, the whole point of the thing is it can heat stuff back up quickly. I doubt most people even cook things to exact time increments. Plus I don't need an alarm to notify everyone in the house that I'm stuffing my fat face at 2 am.

    Just eat all the ham in one go , that'll teach the packet.

    Take the microwave apart and remove the "ding" , be aware of radioactive **** or something.

    Mmmm cigarettes.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,907 ✭✭✭Stephen15


    The edit reason (optional) section when you go to edit a post. What's the point if it's optional.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,450 ✭✭✭✭kneemos


    The KPMG bloke on the Lotto.


  • Registered Users Posts: 284 ✭✭parttime


    Vouge Williams.
    Did anybody see her on celebrity mastermind?
    Embarrassing


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,235 ✭✭✭✭Cee-Jay-Cee


    Chocolate teapot
    Ashtray for a motorbike


  • Registered Users Posts: 103 ✭✭mrhoppy


    IT Tallaght


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,522 ✭✭✭✭Cookie_Monster


    twitter


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,891 ✭✭✭prinzeugen


    Mahogany gas pipe and so called "cold remedies"

    Both fecking useless.. Square hoops, sprout wine?

    I should open a shop. Grot sounds like a good name!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 418 ✭✭cycle4fun


    Irish translations on State documents

    And translating EU business documents in to Irish, ffs, at a cost of millions!

    As if anyone is ever going to read them in Irish. No wonder the EU will fall apart.
    https://www.irishtimes.com/news/politics/irish-translation-of-european-parliament-documents-costing-43-per-page-1.3203792


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,744 ✭✭✭diomed


    Toenails.


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