Ed Sheeran, an agent of the Lizard People?

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 5:04pm #1

I was rewatching the X-Files last night when I had a moment of clarity..

16 songs in the top 20 singles, 3 out of 5 in top albums

Top streamed songs on Spotify

Seemingly endless playing on national radios, millions of followers on twitter, facebook, instagram, billions of views on youtube and awful, awful music.

With less and less people getting vaccinated and the discovery of chemtrails, have the lizard people as part of a massive government conspiracy switched to using Sheeran's music to control us with superpositioned ultrasonic brainwaves? At this point I'd like to remind skeptics about the principle of Occam's Razor, that the simplest answer is most likely the correct one, and here it's a pretty easy decision; that an extra-terrestrial race of lizards in conjunction with shadowy government groups is relentlessly aurally bombarding us to weaken our willpower and make us easier to control, or that somehow people choose to listen to this 'music' on purpose?

Whether Ed himself is one of the blood bathing space reptiles or simply a human puppet remains to be seen, but there are disturbing signs out there, take a look at this picture Scully, notice the motif on the guitar fretboard? And the tattoo on the right elbow? If that's not enough, explain this frankly bizarre image

The pieces fit, the only questions that now remain are, how much more popular will he get and how will this affect the takeover timeline? I'd suggest everyone go straight to the kitchen and craft themselves a set of tinfoil earmuffs to block out the ultra high frequency waves, as your standard tinfoil hat leaves the ears free, undoubtedly this was part of the decision to switch to auditory control mechanisms.

98q76e12hrflnk · 03-05-2017 5:06pm

Never go full retard

Outlaw Pete · 03-05-2017 5:06pm

How's your sisters these days, Jim.

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 5:06pm

Decker Grumpy Symmetry wrote: »

Never go full retard

Looks like they've gotten to you too declan

AlmightyCushion · 03-05-2017 5:07pm

I'd like to point out that his name is an anagram of eared hens. That can't be coincidence. I think it's safe to say that he's using the money from his music career to create some sort of human chicken hybrid to help the Illuminati take over the world.

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 5:08pm

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

I'd like to point out that his name is an anagram of eared hens. That can't be coincidence. I think it's safe to say that he's using the money from his music career to create some sort of human chicken hybrid to help the Illuminati take over the world.

You fool! Can't you see it's the Rand Corporation, everyone knows the Illuminati are just a government cover story

Hoboo · 03-05-2017 5:10pm

If it looks like a lizard, and sounds like a lizard.......

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 5:15pm

Hoboo wrote: »

If it looks like a lizard, and sounds like a lizard.......

The truth is right there Mr. Hoboo

Arghus · 03-05-2017 5:17pm

Well known troubadours those lizards.

Xaracatz · 03-05-2017 5:28pm

If you take some of the letters of his song 'Happier', it spells rep_i__.

REPTILE !!! :eek:

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 5:29pm

Arghus wrote: »

Well known troubadours those lizards.

Think about it, snakes, crocs, dinosaurs all make noise yet lizards appear silent to humans

Alf Stewart. · 03-05-2017 5:30pm

AlmightyCushion wrote: »

I'd like to point out that his name is an anagram of eared hens. That can't be coincidence. I think it's safe to say that he's using the money from his music career to create some sort of human chicken hybrid to help the Illuminati take over the world.

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 5:32pm

Xaracatz wrote: »

If you take some of the letters of his song 'Happier', it spells rep_i__.

REPTILE !!! :eek:

Nice find, now we just need to find the partner songs to complete the sequence. I'm guessing the number of songs will tell us how many years we have left

Xaracatz · 03-05-2017 5:46pm

riffmongous wrote: »

Nice find, now we just need to find the partner songs to complete the sequence. I'm guessing the number of songs will tell us how many years we have left

But wait, there's more..

In a bold move, 99.5 PLAY FM outed Ed Sheeran as a chameleon - the most devious and sneaky of all lizard-kind. This was almost two years ago, and I have never heard of 99.5 PLAY FM in this time. Have they been silenced!?!

Mister Vain · 03-05-2017 5:48pm

I'd like to hear David Icke's opinion on it.

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 5:58pm

Xaracatz wrote: »

But wait, there's more..

In a bold move, 99.5 PLAY FM outed Ed Sheeran as a chameleon - the most devious and sneaky of all lizard-kind. This was almost two years ago, and I have never heard of 99.5 PLAY FM in this time. Have they been silenced!?!

:eek:

I did some background checks on 99.5 PLAY FM and see they had a transmitter in a secret facility somewhere called Antipolo City. Possible link to a polio vaccine based Lizard Syndicate? Was their outing of Ed and subsequent silencing part of a secret conflict between different Reptile factions??

Atoms for Peace · 03-05-2017 6:01pm

His music is on the same frequency that caused Brian Cranston's head to explode, when he guest starred in an episode of the x-files.

Xaracatz · 03-05-2017 6:09pm

riffmongous wrote: »

:eek:

I did some background checks on 99.5 PLAY FM and see they had a transmitter in a secret facility somewhere called Antipolo City. Possible link to a polio vaccine based Lizard Syndicate? Was their outing of Ed and subsequent silencing part of a secret conflict between different Reptile factions??

I fear this has gone beyond mere coincidence.

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 6:12pm

Xaracatz wrote: »

I fear this has gone beyond mere coincidence.

We're through the looking glass here people

The Hill Billy · 03-05-2017 6:12pm

Evergreen - reference to the colour of his 'true' skin?

New Man - song about how he feels after moulting.

Shape of You - the fave tune for a Shape-shifter slow set.

Castle on the Hill - clearly the Great Pyramid of Cheops.

Plus he is ginger & therefore has no soul. OP - You are definitely on to something here!

Mickeroo · 03-05-2017 6:12pm

Disguising himself as a daywalker was the real masterstroke.

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 6:19pm

The Hill Billy wrote: »

Evergreen - reference to the colour of his 'true' skin?

New Man - song about how he feels after moulting.

Shape of You - the fave tune for a Shape-shifter slow set.

Castle on the Hill - clearly the Great Pyramid of Cheops.

Plus he is ginger & therefore has no soul. OP - You are definitely on to something here!

Shape of you, of course..I said it at the start but all the pieces fit, I just hope they don't shut down the entire Boards project now in an effort to cover this up

rmchmufc · 03-05-2017 7:15pm

I don't know about him being an agent of the Lizard People but what I do know is that his Galway Girl song is total crap.

Dr Crayfish · 03-05-2017 7:24pm

I honestly don't know one of his songs, they wouldn't believe me at work when they were trying to buy tickets recently. Where do you people hear this sh*t? In fairness I only listen to RTE Radio 1 and Newstalk, and don't watch Music Television. It's quite easily to avoid this nonsense, I'd have to go out of my way to hear him, so you're doing it wrong if you're hearing him but you don't want to.

Also, the lighter your skin the worse tattoos look IMO.

dirkmeister · 03-05-2017 7:39pm

Yvan eht nioj

riffmongous · 03-05-2017 8:13pm

Dr Crayfish wrote: »

I honestly don't know one of his songs, they wouldn't believe me at work when they were trying to buy tickets recently. Where do you people hear this sh*t? In fairness I only listen to RTE Radio 1 and Newstalk, and don't watch Music Television. It's quite easily to avoid this nonsense, I'd have to go out of my way to hear him, so you're doing it wrong if you're hearing him but you don't want to.

Also, the lighter your skin the worse tattoos look IMO.

Not even one? I guess maybe if you only listen to certain stations it's possible Dr Krycek

Dr Crayfish · 03-05-2017 8:14pm

riffmongous wrote: »

Not even one? I guess maybe if you only listen to certain stations it's possible Dr Krycek

Well maybe if I heard one I'd know the tune, but nope, couldn't hum or name any of his songs.

Agricola · 03-05-2017 8:34pm

I hate this "post cool" age. Back in the good old days musicians used to smoke and drink and wore leather jackets while they were sticking it to the man. They walked with a swagger and smashed the gaff up because........why wouldn't you.

Now people fall over themselves over scruffy little ginger lads with big Irish heads on em who sing about their wexford granny and the like.

I'm out.

Dr Crayfish · 03-05-2017 8:39pm

Agricola wrote: »

Back in the good old days musicians used to smoke and drink and wore leather jackets while they were sticking it to the man.

Well the ones who didn't die at the time all became bourgeois, and now many of them are ageing millionaires, so it didn't really mean anything! Johnny Rotten went on I'm a Celeb ffs.

Agricola · 03-05-2017 9:28pm

Dr Crayfish wrote: »

Well the ones who didn't die at the time all became bourgeois, and now many of them are ageing millionaires, so it didn't really mean anything! Johnny Rotten went on I'm a Celeb ffs.

Still take him over Niall Horan!

Capt'n Midnight · 03-05-2017 9:57pm

riffmongous wrote: »

You fool! Can't you see it's the Rand Corporation, everyone knows the Illuminati are just a government cover story

It's all explained here, you just have to know where to look

https://www.rand.org/content/dam/rand/pubs/monograph_reports/MR1418/MR1418.deviates.pdf

Ed Sheeran, an agent of the Lizard People?

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