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What's the etiquette here??

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Comments

  • #5152
    Hector Savage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,809 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    lawred2 wrote: »
    The vomiting out of me would be of exorcist proportions

    I'd be more worried about the other end!


  • #5153
    EmmetSpiceland
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,022 ✭✭✭✭EmmetSpiceland


    How much would you lads normally “put away” when you’re out pintin’?

    “It is not blood that makes you Irish but a willingness to be part of the Irish nation” - Thomas Davis



  • #5154
    Hector Savage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,809 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    EmmetSpiceland wrote: »
    How much would you lads normally “put away” when you’re out pintin’?

    I used to put away 6/7 when I was younger.... now I'm a lightweight, 3 or 4 does me ....

    at home I might have 3 cans of Guinness watching a film.


  • #5155
    Bobblehats
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,707 ✭✭✭Bobblehats


    Took a tumble downstairs myself this morning it was quite the ordeal. Gutteral rumblings, followed by the nauxious forewarnings of an angry volcano ~ mud spatter; all over the tiles and by the time I’d realised there was nothing on the spool I was already committed and so doubled down on it?!

    Did a mean charlie chaplin and made a break for the hot press utilising whatever afterburps as a propellant but what was black and white was I‘d left a godawful mess in my wake!..returned to the scene of the grime and ticker taped that ****show off. Do *not* enter


  • #5156
    Bullocks
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,890 ✭✭✭Bullocks


    EmmetSpiceland wrote: »
    How much would you lads normally “put away” when you’re out pintin’?

    All depends on the craic when out and the quality of the porter.
    Could go from 2 if its dead and not great to 10 and a lock of vodka and whites. Think I hit 18 pints a while back but that was an exceptional pour of exceptional Guinness. When the pubs are open ill leave down a few the first morning i get the chance


  • #5157
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Bobblehats wrote: »
    Took a tumble downstairs myself this morning it was quite the ordeal. Gutteral rumblings, followed by the nauxious forewarnings of an angry volcano ~ mud spatter; all over the tiles and by the time I’d realised there was nothing on the spool I was already committed and so doubled down on it?!

    Did a mean charlie chaplin and made a break for the hot press utilising whatever afterburps as a propellant but what was black and white was I‘d left a godawful mess in my wake!..returned to the scene of the grime and ticker taped that ****show off. Do *not* enter

    What in the name of fuuherke did all that mean, shaft ?


  • #5158
    Bobblehats
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,707 ✭✭✭Bobblehats


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    What in the name of fuuherke did all that mean, shaft ?

    Do you need an interpreter now Bendar? I had a rough dump


  • #5159
    Nevin Parsnipp
    Registered Users Posts: 832 ✭✭✭Nevin Parsnipp


    Bobblehats wrote: »
    Do you need an interpreter now Bendar? I had a rough dump

    Blew a wild scatter o sh1te...as they say in the Bawder Counties.....


  • #5160
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Bobblehats wrote: »
    Do you need an interpreter now Bendar? I had a rough dump

    Sorry Hats, for some reason it has now become clearer.

    Was skullin a few cans of Argus 8.0 and things ..erm... got a bit foggy.

    Got it now,I think, the Pace Car came through early and the ‘field ‘ came up too fast and rather than try to slow it down you waved the fcuker on with disasterous results .Crashed the fcuking lights like?

    Hope that’s ok with you, soz my friend.


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  • #5161
    mfceiling
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,861 ✭✭✭✭mfceiling


    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1245341400545230851?s=19

    Any claims here for that?


  • #5162
    Bobblehats
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,707 ✭✭✭Bobblehats


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Got it now,I think, the Pace Car came through early and the ‘field ‘ came up too fast and rather than try to slow it down you waved the fcuker on with disasterous results .Crashed the fcuking lights like?


    Effectively brendan :o youknow my field of vision isn’t the best it is only when I had consumed x amounts of this fishy preserve of did I realise it was not so much nice but “nixe”


  • #5163
    gerrybbadd
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,301 ✭✭✭✭gerrybbadd


    mfceiling wrote: »
    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1245341400545230851?s=19

    Any claims here for that?

    Me back in October

    https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showpost.php?p=111530785&postcount=3310


  • #5164
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Bobblehats wrote: »
    Effectively brendan :o youknow my field of vision isn’t the best it is only when I had consumed x amounts of this fishy preserve of did I realise it was not so much nice but “nixe”[/QUOTE]

    Eh... good man Bobbles.... have to be honest and admit I’m still struggling to interpret your output.

    But I feel it’s my fault.


  • #5165
    JohnnyFlash
    Registered Users Posts: 7,055 ✭✭✭JohnnyFlash


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Bobblehats wrote: »
    Effectively brendan :o youknow my field of vision isn’t the best it is only when I had consumed x amounts of this fishy preserve of did I realise it was not so much nice but “nixe”[/QUOTE]

    Eh... good man Bobbles.... have to be honest and admit I’m still struggling to interpret your output.

    But I feel it’s my fault.

    It’s not just use, pal. I’d say the fella has been on the turps since breakfast this morning. Or having regular tokes on Puff the Magic Dragon.


  • #5166
    Bobblehats
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,707 ✭✭✭Bobblehats


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Eh... good man Bobbles.... have to be honest and admit I’m still struggling to interpret your output.

    But I feel it’s my fault.

    How many argus have you had? Trade you brendan on reading the small print these sardines say canned in Morooco but I’d imagine that sounds like a nice break


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  • #5167
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    JohnnyFlash wrote: »
    Brendan Bendar wrote: »

    It’s not just use, pal. I’d say the fella has been on the turps since breakfast this morning. Or having regular tokes on Puff the Magic Dragon.

    Fcuker has been breaking out a serious blunt John, now that we have the shop to ourselves.

    I feel I can be candid. Strong bang of Silver Haze around the house if I am not mistaken.

    Who is the head honcho of this gaff anyway, needs to be called in to restore order,John, place is breaking up.


  • #5168
    EmmetSpiceland
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,022 ✭✭✭✭EmmetSpiceland


    Lads, sort out your quoting. Looks really “amateurish”.

    “It is not blood that makes you Irish but a willingness to be part of the Irish nation” - Thomas Davis



  • #5169
    Pintman Paddy Losty
    Registered Users Posts: 1,913 ✭✭✭Pintman Paddy Losty


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    Sorry Hats, for some reason it has now become clearer.

    Was skullin a few cans of Argus 8.0 and things ..erm... got a bit foggy.

    Got it now,I think, the Pace Car came through early and the ‘field ‘ came up too fast and rather than try to slow it down you waved the fcuker on with disasterous results .Crashed the fcuking lights like?

    Hope that’s ok with you, soz my friend.


    13.57pm is early in the day to be gulling back cans of Arghus, even for you Brenner. Not taking this quarantine too well.


    The airport near being shut down must be seriously getting you down. I believe you regularly head out to the back road there, park up the Fiat Uno, take out your binos and get a hard on looking at airplanes. I believe that is how you perfected the sh*tting in a bag method.


  • #5170
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Pintman Paddy Losty wrote: »
    13.57pm is early in the day to be gulling back cans of Arghus, even for you Brenner. Not taking this quarantine too well.


    The airport near being shut down must be seriously getting you down. I believe you regularly head out to the back road there, park up the Fiat Uno, take out your binos and get a hard on looking at airplanes. I believe that is how you perfected the sh*tting in a bag method.

    Correct Paddy not quarrying too well today, cut the cords early.

    Now I’ll have to correct you on plane spotting bit.

    If I never saw another fcuking aeroplane in my life, I would be quite happy.

    Smelly sour awkward fcuking machines.


  • #5171
    Bobblehats
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,707 ✭✭✭Bobblehats


    Back on “terra firma” then.


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  • #5172
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Bobblehats wrote: »
    Back on “terra firma” then.

    Undergoing ‘heavy landing’ procedures.


  • #5173
    padd b1975
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,782 ✭✭✭✭padd b1975


    EmmetSpiceland wrote: »
    How much would you lads normally “put away” when you’re out pintin’?

    Just north of the gallon at a recent funeral, all Smithwicks.

    Hit the top shelf then, which more or less coincided with a catastrophic failure in my numeracy skills.


  • #5174
    snoopboggybog
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭snoopboggybog


    EmmetSpiceland wrote: »
    How much would you lads normally “put away” when you’re out pintin’?

    12-15 pints usually and maybe an oul Jack and coke at the end for a night cap.

    If just heading for few and work the next day usually 7-8.


  • #5175
    fuerte1976
    Closed Accounts Posts: 692 ✭✭✭fuerte1976


    snoopboggybog wrote: »
    12-15 pints usually and maybe an oul Jack and coke at the end for a night cap.

    If just heading for few and work the next day usually 7-8.

    In and around my figures..

    Minus that pi33 of a night cap..


  • #5176
    lawred2
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,457 ✭✭✭✭lawred2


    snoopboggybog wrote: »
    12-15 pints usually and maybe an oul Jack and coke at the end for a night cap.

    If just heading for few and work the next day usually 7-8.

    Lies surely


  • #5177
    Nevin Parsnipp
    Registered Users Posts: 832 ✭✭✭Nevin Parsnipp


    Just a bit of "top loading" L....the denizens of this rather basic discussion site ...would, in the main, not be known for their close acquaintance with verifiable facts.

    Having said that I recently had occasion to visit the traps in a very up market establishment and walked into a wall of sour malodorous fetid stench.

    The one vacant trap was spattered with greasy gouts of loose midden almost everywhere but in the pan....trap was completely "taken out" .

    So while I would take the pint drinkin numbers with a pinch of salt....the sh1te sagas could be true and accurate.


  • #5178
    fuerte1976
    Closed Accounts Posts: 692 ✭✭✭fuerte1976


    lawred2 wrote: »
    Lies surely

    Don't think it is..


  • #5179
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Nevin Parsnipp wrote: »
    Just a bit of "top loading" L....the denizens of this rather basic discussion site ...would, in the main, not be known for their close acquaintance with verifiable facts.

    Having said that I recently had occasion to visit the traps in a very up market establishment and walked into a wall of sour malodorous fetid stench.

    The one vacant trap was spattered with greasy gouts of loose midden almost everywhere but in the pan....trap was completely "taken out" .

    So while I would take the pint drinkin numbers with a pinch of salt....the sh1te sagas could be true and accurate.


    Very traumatic trap experience Nevin, can’t have been a pretty sight.

    Some cove must have had a disagreement with the bar or restaurant staff and blown a cargo of ‘bush meat’ all over the furniture.

    If you had a fully contained trap one could add to the load though, without too much difficulty.


  • #5180
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,476 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1245643393323028488

    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1244314635194564609

    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1242049710745149440


    Have to agree with this one:

    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1243997546248364036


    :eek:
    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1241294735383412741

    Scrap the cap!



  • #5181
    Hector Savage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,809 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    Hotblack Desiato wrote: »


    :eek:
    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1241294735383412741


    I have heard stories about sh*ts in kettles,microwaves and ovens and apparently the smell gets so ingrained into the walls they need to remove wallpaper and plaster, it's a massive massive massive job.

    I think some rockband did it in a hotel and the whole floor had to be shut for a deep clean and re wallpaper ....


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  • #5182
    JohnnyFlash
    Registered Users Posts: 7,055 ✭✭✭JohnnyFlash


    Hector Savage wrote: »
    I have heard stories about sh*ts in kettles,microwaves and ovens and apparently the smell gets so ingrained into the walls they need to remove wallpaper and plaster, it's a massive massive massive job.

    I think some rockband did it in a hotel and the whole floor had to be shut for a deep clean and re wallpaper ....

    Wrap it in a towel and put it in behind the cylinder in the hot press when visiting the gaff of some jerk you don’t like.


  • #5183
    sligojoek
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 25,420 ✭✭✭✭sligojoek


    The laptop waffle is another one.


  • #5184
    Hector Savage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,809 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    sligojoek wrote: »
    The laptop waffle is another one.

    ah jaysus!!


  • #5185
    snoopboggybog
    Closed Accounts Posts: 454 ✭✭snoopboggybog


    lawred2 wrote: »
    Lies surely

    A lot of country pubs on a Saturday would be full 12PM to 3AM with lads drinking all day. Even City pubs but wouldn't notice it as much as more options.

    I wouldn't be fond of drinking but when I got at it I'd got it awful hard.


  • #5186
    PTH2009
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 38,885 ✭✭✭✭PTH2009


    Heaven Knows im miserable now


  • #5187
    Hector Savage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,809 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    Some session when all this is over, I might even go as far as 8 pints....


  • #5188
    Hector Savage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,809 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    https://twitter.com/fesshole/status/1245733986586046465?s=21


    OK who on here is this ?


  • #5189
    Nevin Parsnipp
    Registered Users Posts: 832 ✭✭✭Nevin Parsnipp


    Hector Savage wrote: »
    Some session when all this is over, I might even go as far as 8 pints....

    Eight pints and a massive spattery sh1te on the premises.....what's not to like about that ?


  • #5190
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    Nevin Parsnipp wrote: »
    Eight pints and a massive spattery sh1te on the premises.....what's not to like about that ?

    Well Nevin, if the barkeep was a bit sour and tried to stiff you after the 6th or 7th ,repairing to cludgie and hosing a thick burst soft runnell over the furniture would be a good move.

    And then swamp the back seat of the taxi on the way home.

    A lad could wake up the next day quite satisfied with his nights work.

    Don’t you think?


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  • #5191
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,476 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    Bit horsh on the poor cabbie, n'est-ce pas?

    (I remember a boards thread where a taxi driver went totally apeshít because someone used the word "cabbie", wtf?)

    Scrap the cap!



  • #5192
    EmmetSpiceland
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,022 ✭✭✭✭EmmetSpiceland


    Just got “splashed” right up at the back of the ballbag, right where it meets the “barse”.

    Everything about it felt “wrong”. The shock, the trickle down, the drying...everything.

    You never give much thought to the back of the “bag”, perhaps this is the wake up call I need to pay more attention. I’ll give it some extra suds in the shower, it’ll be a start at least.

    “It is not blood that makes you Irish but a willingness to be part of the Irish nation” - Thomas Davis



  • #5193
    JohnnyFlash
    Registered Users Posts: 7,055 ✭✭✭JohnnyFlash


    sligojoek wrote: »
    The laptop waffle is another one.

    Or if you are a golfer then unload into the golf shoes of some cünt who didn’t give you a gimme or called you up on some obscure rule while playing. Wait until he has left the locker room and headed into the bar for a pint.


  • #5194
    Hector Savage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,809 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    EmmetSpiceland wrote: »
    Just got “splashed” right up at the back of the ballbag, right where it meets the “barse”.

    Everything about it felt “wrong”. The shock, the trickle down, the drying...everything.

    You never give much thought to the back of the “bag”, perhaps this is the wake up call I need to pay more attention. I’ll give it some extra suds in the shower, it’ll be a start at least.
    Nothing more annoying then cold water splashing up on any area of the hole, always seems like a lot of it too ....


  • #5195
    Hector Savage
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,809 ✭✭✭Hector Savage


    JohnnyFlash wrote: »
    Or if you are a golfer then unload into the golf shoes of some cünt who didn’t give you a gimme or called you up on some obscure rule while playing. Wait until he has left the locker room and headed into the bar for a pint.

    Bit of top decking in his gaff is yer only man too ..


  • #5196
    Brendan Bendar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 19,727 ✭✭✭✭Brendan Bendar


    JohnnyFlash wrote: »
    Or if you are a golfer then unload into the golf shoes of some cünt who didn’t give you a gimme or called you up on some obscure rule while playing. Wait until he has left the locker room and headed into the bar for a pint.

    John, much more effective, haze a sour scutthery loose load on your golf towel.

    Then shake her into the golf bag, down each club tube, or aperture.

    Will cost you a towel, but guaranteed the bag will never be used again.


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  • #5197
    fuerte1976
    Closed Accounts Posts: 692 ✭✭✭fuerte1976


    Brendan Bendar wrote: »
    John, much more effective, haze a sour scutthery loose load on your golf towel.

    Then shake her into the golf bag, down each club tube, or aperture.

    Will cost you a towel, but guaranteed the bag will never be used again.

    Ah, ha ha ha ha- ffs!
    Lol


  • #5198
    Rodney Bathgate
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,445 ✭✭✭Rodney Bathgate


    Reading the golfing suggestions, just wondering if anyone on here has ever taken a dump in a Pringles tube?

    (I haven’t to date.)


  • #5199
    JohnnyFlash
    Registered Users Posts: 7,055 ✭✭✭JohnnyFlash


    Rodney Bathgate wrote: »
    Reading the golfing suggestions, just wondering if anyone on here has ever taken a dump in a Pringles tube?

    (I haven’t to date.)

    Why would you need to do so; Roddy?


  • #5200
    Cartman78
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,714 ✭✭✭Cartman78


    JohnnyFlash wrote: »
    Why would you need to do so; Roddy?

    To make the Pringles taste nicer maybe....:confused:


  • #5201
    Hotblack Desiato
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,476 ✭✭✭✭Hotblack Desiato


    EmmetSpiceland wrote: »
    Just got “splashed” right up at the back of the ballbag, right where it meets the “barse”.

    Everything about it felt “wrong”. The shock, the trickle down, the drying...everything.

    You never give much thought to the back of the “bag”, perhaps this is the wake up call I need to pay more attention. I’ll give it some extra suds in the shower, it’ll be a start at least.

    Give the liathróidí a check for the oul' ball cancer when you're down there. Can't be too careful.

    Scrap the cap!



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