Wedding on a Thursday

suilegorma · 01-02-2021 8:43am

Another perspective, I was once at a Thursday wedding where I was very short on holidays. I was able to take a half day on the Thursday & work remotely (albeit very bleary eyed!) on the Friday. This might be more of an option for people in future depending on your guests. I have heard of plenty of teachers who can't attend weekday (including Friday) wedding ceremonies and arrive for the party so I am sure people will do what they can if it's important to them to be there in some way or politely decline.

Afaik church weddings are not that common on a Sunday but can happen, I was at one and it took place later in the day. Also registrar offices won't be open but maybe it's something to be considered by government, I always thought it was strange that it was a M-F only service, maybe the fee could be higher to cover any additional cost or maybe weekend only solemnisers could be hired, I am sure this type of work schedule would suit someone (also think the same re driving testers!)....then there are private solemnisers. And of course you could go down the route of private ceremony and the separate wedding party, we did a blessing at the start of our actual party and did the legal bit in a registry office after.

Best of luck with your decision...I is an exciting time in these strange times.

Wheretonext · 01-02-2021 6:22pm

Go with what suits you and your partner, you guys are paying for it and not the people who call it a cheap date or give out about taking an extra day of annual leave. Very few friends will turn down an invite just because it involves taking an extra day of annual leave and if they do then there would be a mutual understanding/support that that's ok. As many have said it's an invite not a contractual obligation to show up. I can understand if you have a lot of shift workers or teachers in your friend group it would make it more difficult.

Myself and my OH have been to Wednesday, Thursday, Friday & Saturday weddings and have enjoyed them all and we'll be going to our first Sunday wedding in December. The only time we turned down an invite was when someone invited us the week before their wedding and we had plans.

Best of luck and enjoy the planning it must be great to have something other than Covid going on to distract yourself.

Addle · 01-02-2021 6:57pm

Not everyone works Monday to Friday.
No one has to stay the night or attend for 2 days.
I do work Monday-Friday, so would prefer not to take days off mid week, but once you’re at the wedding, you forget what day of the week it is and still have the weekend to yourself.
There’ll be a lot more week day weddings in the next couple of years to deal with all the postponed parties.

appledrop · 01-02-2021 7:05pm

If you have the option of Friday then go with that.

It just usually suits more people especially if people have to get children minded etc and take annual leave.

I actually prefer Fri even more than Saturday because you still have Sunday then to do your own thing at home.

Pink11 · 01-02-2021 7:38pm

SillyMangoX wrote: »

Uh oh. Seeing the responses on this is going to be fun for my Tuesday wedding..

I honestly would understand if people can’t get the time off work though. I know the people I care about most will be there no matter what day of the week it is so if some of my further out family or friends can’t make it I wouldn’t hold it against them! Although mine is around mid-term time which also helps!

I'm also joining the Tuesday club. Not because I want to or to save money - we literally had no option to even get a Thursday. We're a re-schedule.

We feel if it offends people so much they should decline and we would totally understand. We've told our family and friends and unless they are liars pretty much everyone has said 'we don't care what day it is, we'll be there and we understand ye had little choice!'

I do think you'd want to be fairly mean to begrudge us given the circumstances!

SillyMangoX · 02-02-2021 1:13am

Pink11 wrote: »

I'm also joining the Tuesday club. Not because I want to or to save money - we literally had no option to even get a Thursday. We're a re-schedule.

We feel if it offends people so much they should decline and we would totally understand. We've told our family and friends and unless they are liars pretty much everyone has said 'we don't care what day it is, we'll be there and we understand ye had little choice!'

I do think you'd want to be fairly mean to begrudge us given the circumstances!

In our case, also not a money saving thing, but we always had a dream of getting married on Halloween. It just happens to fall on a Tuesday in 2023!
At the end of the day, it’s our wedding, we want it to be for us. While we of course want all our guests to have an absolutely magical experience, I would totally understand it not being everyone’s cup of tea.

Pink11 · 02-02-2021 1:27am

SillyMangoX wrote: »

In our case, also not a money saving thing, but we always had a dream of getting married on Halloween. It just happens to fall on a Tuesday in 2023!
At the end of the day, it’s our wedding, we want it to be for us. While we of course want all our guests to have an absolutely magical experience, I would totally understand it not being everyone’s cup of tea.

I think that's really cool honestly, go for it!

We also got our price list. It's 10p.p more expensive than our August, Saturday 2021 date so it's actually more expensive!

Neyite · 03-02-2021 1:06pm

The next couple of years will be different, and like most areas of life, weddings will also change a bit from the traditional format due to a rethink after covid. No harm.

Lots of couples who booked a venue and paid a deposit are in the unhappy position of losing a substantial amount of money if they don't accept alternative dates offered by the venue. The principle of not letting the venue have 'free money would make me ensure that I got the service I put the deposit on whatever crap dates they offered.

We never had a traditional venue that don't often do weddings anyway so ours was easy and free to reschedule. It still remains to be seen whether our 2021 plan can go ahead or not but I'm not going to worry about that until the end of April when hopefully things might be clearer vaccine-wise.

lazygal · 03-02-2021 2:46pm

In some ways I'd love a covid wedding. You'll only have to invite people you want there. Declines won't be a big deal because we know we all have slightly mad lives right now. I'd do so many things differently compared to the wedding we had 10 years ago. I know a few couples who just went to the registry office with two witnesses and now aren't going to bother with a big party because there's no point after being married for months (their words).

Summer2020 · 03-02-2021 2:48pm

I was at a Thursday wedding before. What I ended up doing was taking it easy on the drink and leaving at 00:30 so as not to take the Friday as leave. You could well find a lot leaving early to do the same.

03-02-2021 3:01pm

yourdeadwright wrote: »

Hey guys
Just wondering what are your thoughts on getting invited to a wedding on a Thursday ,
We have decided to cancel our wedding this summer and rebooked it for next year , Just kind of stuck between doing it on a Friday or a Thursday next year ,,

The available Thursday suits us because its 1 month earlier than the Friday is available,

Now its not a massive inconvenience to us to wait a month for the Friday but i'm just wondering what do guest think of getting invites for a Thursday ,

If there is a friday available a month later, take the friday.

woodchuck · 03-02-2021 3:07pm

lazygal wrote: »

In some ways I'd love a covid wedding. You'll only have to invite people you want there.

Be careful what you wish for. We're hoping for 25 and will obviously only be inviting people we really want there. The problem is, they might not want to be there. My own parents are only willing to stay for the ceremony. My sister refuses to come out of fear and my brother lives abroad, so it won't really be feasible for him to come. So even though we'll (hopefully) have only 25 people, none of them will actually include the people I want there the most.

lazygal wrote: »

I know a few couples who just went to the registry office with two witnesses and now aren't going to bother with a big party because there's no point after being married for months (their words).

That's my feeling too tbh. I know a lot of people are going with this option, including a good friend of mine. Whatever we do on the day itself though, that's the wedding celebration, not a party we have months/years later.

03-02-2021 3:32pm

I would do whatever you both feel comfortable with OP. These are strange times and the people who matter will understand that you can't be too choosy. We considered getting married on a Thursday because we had difficulty finding a Saturday with numbers under 100. Not everyone would have made it but that is going to be the case now anyways.

As an aside there is something I notice and that's a kind of, dismissive maybe, attitude towards anyone who would like a big wedding.
Alot of people have said to us how our numbers are so much better than say 100 or 200. There's an element of looking down ones nose at inviting loads of guests or even having lots of extra things.

Weddings really bring out the strange in some people.

PhilOssophy · 03-02-2021 5:26pm

When it comes to inviting guests to a wedding, you are damned if you do damned if you don't. The people who say they love a small wedding would be the first ones offended if a close friend didn't invite them due to a small wedding!
You cannot win when it comes to weddings, if you do everything like every other wedding it is samey, if you do something different is showing off or trying to be cool.

Wedding on a Thursday

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