Sporina's Quitlog

So, I read the Alan Carr book and while there is a lot of what he said in my head, I am not convinced by his theory. I mean, there is a part of me that is happy to not have to smoke, but I can feel cravings from true nicotine addiction. That is real, whether it is psychological or physical. It is taking will power to not smoke.
I do not think I would ever be able to be totally happy to quit smoking, like the way he describes.
Some day when I am well into recovery from smoking, I will read more about his theory.
Anyway, I think his book is helping me, but I am using patches too, to help with the physical addiction, as I will have a very tough time coping with the emotional and psychological side of things.

locater7 wrote: »

hi soprina
by 3 pm yesterday i was off cigs one week
second half of last week was really hard--still have moments and am grumpy
went cold turkey after giving up on champix after one week--too strange
best of luck on your journey and i reckon you will suceed-you have prepared yourself for this and now its down to will power
wishing you best of luck

thanks but do not be fooled by my awareness - i am good at that - will power though does not come easy to me,. But I am doing good so far..

so I survived day one. Last night I went to the cinema and it was a relief not to have to smoke when the show was over and that is the truth.
Also, it is nice to be able to share a kiss with a non smoker without the guilt of having a stinking breath!!!:P

But, last night I dreamt that I smoked and I was really annoyed about it in the dream. I was sooo delighted when I woke up to find that it was only a dream. Strange how the mind works. But looks like the non smoking effort has really gotten into my subconscious which is great.

username123 wrote: »

OMG Sporina!!! Are you me???

You have described exactly how I felt over the first few days - relief at not having to smoke, guiltless kisses, smoke dreaming and being so annoyed in the dream and so glad that it was only a dream!!! Thats so funny!!!

Im delighted for you now, you have passed a whole Day 1 - which is the biggest day of all, the first step is the hardest and all that.

I had a stressful dental appointment with some bad news this morning (have to get nasty expensive things done) and even after it I didnt feel like smoking. I did cry the whole way home in the car though, but was still relieved that I wasnt trying to jam a ciggy into my numb lips!!!

wow - thats cool. Yeah I read somewhere else about smoking dreams so I guess it is typical for some. I am sorry to hear about your bad news on the dentist. But on the up side, at least you were able to go to the dentist as a non smoker. When ever I go to the dentist, he asks me when am I going to quit and I always feel guilt ridden. Hopefully next time I go I will be a non smoker - that will be another plus. He attributes my minute gum disease to my smoking. I am actually thinking of getting some teeth whitening done too in the future.
Again sorry about your bad news - but it would be worse if you came back from the doc having learnt that you have a smoking related illness.

Hi Folks, well near then end of day 3. This was my first day at work and not smoking. I was worried about it but it turned out that I was relieved that I did not have to cut my dining part of lunch break short to go out in the rain and smoke. And I didn't even feel the need to eat extra after my lunch - I just had a cuppa and sat back and relaxed.
Actually, I mentioned earlier that I might find it difficult to quit smoking because I tend to be an anxious person - but I honestly have found that I am now more relaxed. Maybe it was the smoking that was contributing to my anxiety; the fact that I was smoking even though a major part of me hated it?!. I don't know - but the thought occured to be today.

thanks 123 - you are dead right.
but i felt terrible this morn - cravings and then i had palpitations all morning and felt really shaky. i am feeling better now though. not sure if the symptoms are from the patches or tiredness - hardly nicotine withdrawl as i am on patches. I will stick with the current plan though for now.. i will ride through the crap...:)

whoo hoooo.. day 6. Off work and up early and hitting the gym for a step class before heading away for the night. This quitting the smokes lark is great as it has inspired a whole new healthy me as the cinema was chosen over the usual bottle of wine for my friday night.

yeah 123, to refer to Alan Carr again, it was the fear of failure that took me so long to pick a time to quit. But also, I think it just took a lot of time for my mind to really come full circling to really WANTING to quit as well as feeling READY to do so.
Oh and I had a few glasses of wine last night and still no major craving.:)
Good luck to all.

username123 wrote: »

Thanks for this bit, I still havent had a night of drinking, Ive had 2 small glasses of wine at home, but not been out - I wouldnt drink that often anyway but it is a fear of mine that I will fail then. I feel more positive that it was ok for you.

As for being ready, I honestly think its the key to it isnt it? I told some friends on Saturday afternoon that Id quit and they were amazed and delighted for me, but one of them said that Id been making it harder and harder for myself for years, cutting down, not smoking at home, less socialising, not smoking in the car if I had a passenger etc.... So I guess that was all part of the mental preparation.

oh, i wasn't out - it was in my friends house…

I am however dreading meeting and drinking with a few mates in particular, as they are smokers. As sad and all as I am to say it, I think i will have to avoid them for some time. A few months anyway.

got some bad news on day 10 and really really wanted a cigarette

Day 11 now and feeling sorry for myself and really want a cigarette but I won't give in.
Its difficult to think of all the reason's why you quit when you get the compulsion to quit. God dam it.

So I am defo an emotional smoker.
One thing quitting has given me is a bit of pride - I would feel so **** if I smoked.. i would be disgusted with myself..

markesmith wrote: »

Stick with it Sporina, you've become an inspiration...I'm on day 2 now, mates want me to go to the pub and I'm tempted, but I know if I get a few pints in me...

Stay strong!

thanks mark - fair play to you. Yeah the pub is a tough one. I was out last night, had a few beers and on the way home I had a thought "if i meet someone smoking i may ask them for one". Thankfully I didn't. I am not sure if I would have had, but its a wake up call. I would hate to think that all my hard work would be ruined by a drunken impulse. I am going to do a little revision now to remind myself of why I gave up so that I will be stronger in a situation like last night. Bloody drink - maybe I should give that up too.

So did you go out Mark?

Hi All, ok Day 18 and i am very happy today as the sky is blue and the sun is out. Yes, I suffer from SAD too, so today's weather is very much welcomed. And its Spring - and I do indeed have a spring in my step.

However, with the nice weather and all, comes a change in mood from meh to excitement. And with excitement comes….. CRAVINGS for god dam Nicotine!!!

I would have thought that by day 18 they would have subsided? And it feels like a physical craving as oppose to just an emotional association????

I am very confused. I mean, I am wearing patches, so shouldn't I be free from Nicotine cravings (physical)?

Or could it be just an emotional craving but feels like its physical???

And are the patches helping or not??

I would love some professional insight to all of this.

Either way, I will not smoke.

Off to the gym with me now to get an endorphin hit!!

I would love some insight so if anyone has anything to share, please feel free..:)

Ok, day ? Well it will be 6 weeks on Monday - smoke free that is. Though I have to say, I am not a happy camper. I was out last night and while I did not smoke, there was a little green eyed monster on my shoulder saying "ok, first chance I get I am going to go out to the smoking area and nab a ciggy from someone". It felt like I had another personality, looking back on it now that is. But I didn't give it. But I felt a bit like jackal and hyde.

I am annoyed at myself for having had these thoughts. I wish I was able to go out and have a drink and not have these thoughts. I am worried that sometime that monster will be stronger than me.

I know I should be happy that I did not smoke - but why am I getting these notions when I have a drink? Its not even that I get cravings - they are more like naughty thoughts.. can anyone relate?

Honest Bob wrote: »

Hi Sporina,

Day 3 and sucking NiQuitin Lozenge. Physical withdrawls have never really been a problem but being out for a drink without a smoke-that's my downfall.
Keep it going

Hi bob, thanks for the post.
So what is your strategy this time round?

username123 wrote: »

Well done MaryMaryMary, youre doing great, urrrgh, Day 3 - take a lemsip and treat it like youre not well because it sure feels that way!!!

Definitely try to keep busy over the weekend. For me, glasses of water and fishermans friends were my craving kickers!

Dont be thinking in negative terms of avoiding people and places. Dont put yourself into silly situations like very drunk with a group of smokers, but enjoy your life!! Do things you wouldnt have done before without smoking. Ive rediscovered the joy of going to a restaurant, its so nice not to HAVE to keep leaving the table to smoke, and me standing out in the cold, my husband left sitting alone - looking back I honestly dont know how I thought my smoking was enjoyable!!

Definitely get into the exercise. And buy yourself something nice with the saved smoke money! I bought myself nice leather boots after the first month - they cost almost 4 weeks of smoke money (which was approx 40 euro a week for me). Now Im considering a particular pair of binoculars that I dont really need, but they only cost 2 weeks of smoke money so I feel Id be justified lol (Ill have a different habit to quit if I keep carrying on like this!).

Sporina you good old quitter - hows the smoke free life treating you? Are you doing the nrt or done with that now? Enjoyed your 'climbed a mountain' post - thought it appropriate on many levels!!!

you know, reading a post like yours 123 makes me so glad we have access to forums such as these. Virtual or not. I mean we can talk to our loved one's about quitting smoking or what ever, but no one gets it like those who are going through it themselves.

you are so right about the lemsip in a metaphorical way.. when quitting you are kinda ill as the body tries hard to fight the withdrawals of an addiction. So Mary, even more reason for us to be nice to ourselves for a while.

Such a nice way to put it 123 - fair play to you. It would almost make me wanna set up a quitting smoking night out!!!:)

I am getting on great. Still on the patches - gonna stick to the course - a month left. I know I will have to get off them but I have broken all the associations I had created with smoking thanks to the patches so I am still glad I used them. I needed the crutch as well.
But otherwise I am so glad to be a non smoker - or ex smoker. God its crazy how I use to torture myself, waiting and looking for opportunities to get out and poison myself. Like yesterday at work, I went for a tea break with the others in the tv room and as I looked out the window at the rain I thought "8 weeks ago, I would have been out there puffing away, increasing my risk of chronic diseases as well as that of pneumonia.

happy non smoking days.

Oh, I have not done the big night out yet with smokers but I am pretty well prepared for when it does happen. Have a good few nights out this weekend but I will be with non smokers so I can't see it being an issue.
And also, the thoughts of the guilt of smoking is enough to prevent me from doing it, I think; I hope.

Well done to you too 123...

cheers 123..

So did the night in with a bunch of gals; there was only one smoker among us but there was no temptation. Strange but true. I guess the fact that there were other ex smokers there too helped. Maybe.

Also did the big night out with all the smoking area's etc but I was grand. Ok, I was not very drunk on either occasion but even so.

I think I am really starting to treat this fear that is smoking when drunk, as another entity to myself. Like its another voice. And I am not listening to it.

8 weeks off them today.

Started on the lowest dose of patch.

The buzz of not quitting has kinda worn off - but I know how disgusted I would be with myself if I ever smoke again.

username123 wrote: »

Well done. I think a lot of our fears are totally needless, just goes to show how strong that addiction was eh?

I have been out for dinner, had a few drinks, been out with girls, walked through smoking areas etc... I havent been very drunk - but I wouldnt be drunk terribly often anyway, maybe 5 or 6 times in a year, so its not really a big issue.

Yeah I agree you lose the buzz a bit, novelty wears off I guess! Although Im enjoying observing my improving cardiovascular system - Im doing a couch to 5k, I find myself warming down after a run thinking 'never in a million years while I was smoking would I have done this'. I used to take plenty of exercise, but it was mostly anerobic or endurance based as opposed to really getting the heart rate up!

My new plan for life is to be fitter at 40 than ever before. Shouldnt be too hard seeing as I smoked since my late teens for 20 odd years!! Even if I sat around for the next couple of years Id probably still be fitter than I was lol!

yeah I get you about the fitness - not smoking just motivates you to do more as you feel that it won't be so laborious. We can enjoy it more as non smokers. God, one can be tempted to say "why did I ever smoker etc" - but that neither here nor there really. Its all about being human. Onwards and upwards.
Dying with pain after having a wisdom tooth removed - but on the upside - I don't have the "oh when can I smoke" issue… lol.

Ok - so 9 weeks today.. and great news!!

I sat in a beer garden/smoking area all saturday night and did not smoke!!

A tiny part of me wanted to but thats still the addiction me thinks!!

I am so delighted.
Long may it live..

username123 wrote: »

Great to hear Sporina! Talk about walking right up to the Gates of Doom and flipping the bird eh??? Youve done brilliantly, many congrats on 9 weeks off the filthy feicers!

ha ha I have never heard that before???

Thanks - well there was a gang of us; most were non smokers but the pub was packed so we just ended up in the beer garden by default. It was grand. And actually, I noticed that there were not that many people smoking.