Have you ever had depression?

Ginja Ninja · 02-05-2010 3:47pm

rovert wrote: »

Do the working class get depression or is it a middle class thing?

rovert wrote: »

Am I allowed to reply to this? As it is rather ignorant.

you kind of answered your own question there,by all means reply.But claiming that serious emotional/mental health isssues is only for the middle class is one of the most ignorant things I've seen on boards since I've joined[and I'm one of the more ignorant people you'll meet].

And I'll say this: I'm from a "working class" background if you want to call it that and I've had depression,does that disprove your argument? Think so

A Neurotic wrote: »

It was a heavily sarcastic response to a rather ignorant question.

We're trying to get that as the definition of Fad in the dictionary

rovert · 02-05-2010 4:25pm

Im not claiming or arguing anything, mods am I allowed to reply here or what?

Bobalicious93 · 02-05-2010 4:47pm

Ginja Ninja wrote: »

But claiming that serious emotional/mental health isssues is only for the middle class is one of the most ignorant things I've seen on boards since I've joined[and I'm one of the more ignorant people you'll meet].

And I'll say this: I'm from a "working class" background if you want to call it that and I've had depression,does that disprove your argument? Think so

I don't see where he did this. He asked a question. Stop looking for things to get annoyed about.

Insect Overlord · 02-05-2010 5:10pm

rovert wrote: »

Im not claiming or arguing anything, mods am I allowed to reply here or what?

Of course you can reply, but don't be surprised if some people give you sarcastic responses.
The question you posted on Friday was either a) an ill-advised attempt at pollemicism or b) deliberately insensitive.

Bobalicious93, use the "report post" function if you have an issue with a post.
Your most recent contribution is nothing but detrimental to the flow of this thread.

Jay P · 06-05-2010 11:08pm

It's interesting...or something, I'm not quite sure of the word, but people here seem so nice and brilliant and happy, but I find it really surprising how many people have serious problems in their lives. And it's not just here either, my house mate told me some stuff a few weeks ago that left me utterly stunned me. I find it crazy how little you know about people unless they say something straight out. I'm not saying I know everyone here, but things are just never as they seem. This may not be the right place to say this, but it puts things in perspective for me.

More specifically to here, I think you guys are all unbelievably brave for just saying these things in such a public place.

for all of you guys

rovert · 09-05-2010 2:49am

Insect Overlord wrote: »

Of course you can reply, but don't be surprised if some people give you sarcastic responses.
The question you posted on Friday was either a) an ill-advised attempt at pollemicism or b) deliberately insensitive.

But I got a warning before I could state either. I was merely making reference to the research published about the issue that week. Sorry if I expected most of you to be more clued in about the subject. :rolleyes:

Piste · 09-05-2010 12:38pm

Ok, expand on it if you want.

Pygmalion · 09-05-2010 4:29pm

rovert wrote: »

But I got a warning before I could state either. I was merely making reference to the research published about the issue that week. Sorry if I expected most of you to be more clued in about the subject. :rolleyes:

Sorry, that must have been published in that one medical journal that I don't read every issue of from cover to cover.

Insect Overlord · 09-05-2010 4:37pm

I sent several PMs to rovert last night, inviting him to contribute evidence of his research.
Whether or not he does post it is now up to him.
Until such a point as he clarifies his position, I would appreciate it if people move on so as not to enflame the situation.

A Neurotic · 09-05-2010 6:03pm

I'm studying the cognitive model of depression (negative thoughts are central to forming depression and not just a symptom of it) for an exam tomorrow. It's seriously interesting.

lou91 · 09-05-2010 6:24pm

A Neurotic wrote: »

I'm studying the cognitive model of depression (negative thoughts are central to forming depression and not just a symptom of it) for an exam tomorrow. It's seriously interesting.

Beck, Negative Triads, etc.?

It definitely makes sense. Having studied that stuff a bit in psychology, I do find myself realising when I'm having "maladaptive" thoughts and try to curb them a bit. It actually works pretty well.

lilmissprincess · 10-05-2010 5:35am

Got diagnosed in January this year after three years of being up and down. Initially it was thought to be bipolar disorder, but it turned out I wasn't happy enough. Kind of all came to a head in November, when one of my best friends died suddenly and the world started crumbling, i was very lucky to be surrounded by a group of amazing new college friends and a system in UCC that made it easy to get help. I know for a fact in my secondary school it isn't something ever mentioned which really annoys me; there is this image in Co. Wexford at least that if you talk about suicide or bad thoughts you will just encourage others to do it. Thats not right at all in my opinion but its what we were always led to believe.

A Neurotic · 10-05-2010 2:44pm

RandomUserName! wrote: »

Beck, Negative Triads, etc.?

It definitely makes sense. Having studied that stuff a bit in psychology, I do find myself realising when I'm having "maladaptive" thoughts and try to curb them a bit. It actually works pretty well.

Aye, Beck's Triad. We only cover the absolute basics (I like to call the module Psychology Lite) so we only had one lecture on it but it's fascinating stuff.

[/wishes did Psychology]

Extrasupervery · 28-05-2010 12:14am

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/

the dude who wrote this

Extrasupervery · 28-05-2010 12:19am

and

http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/whattodo.htm

as a continuation

SIX PACK · 28-05-2010 12:29am

I often felt sorry for myself then i would watch some videos of Street kids who dont have a home to go to, Then i would snap out of my buzz & be glad of what i have... Then i would cheer myself up by listening to some music or watch some tv phone a family member or whatever the case may be. But as i said id usually think of people who are way more unfortunate than i & give myself a kick up the backside & think positive

Insect Overlord · 28-05-2010 8:23pm

The last time I felt depressed, thinking about those less fortunate made me feel worse. Instead of making me appreciate all the great things I have in my life, it made me feel (i) angry at all the injustice in the world, (ii) powerless to do anything about those injustices and (iii) more ashamed of myself for feeling so down when my life wasn't that bad.

*tries to think happy thoughts*

Konata · 31-05-2010 9:04pm

Just thought I'd throw in a little update on myself here, and an important discovery I've made regarding diagnoses.

In recent weeks, I've been diagnosed with a condition known as Borderline Personality Disorder - it covers my depression, addictions, self-harm, anorexia, bulimia, and certain personality traits. I'm not a huge fan of the name - it immediately conjures up ideas of 'split personalities' or that I have some sort of 'defective' personality. That's really not it at all. It causes a huge vulnerability to mental illnesses and addictions. I went on fluoxethine (Prozac) for 2 months which had horrible side-effects and have been on sertraline (Lustral) now for nearly 3 months with better results. As well as that, I've 8 months of counselling specifically for eating disorders under my belt.

Now, what I wanted to say was that I discovered BPD myself through research on the internet. I felt that there had to be some reason for why I've developed so many mental illnesses. I'd been seeing a psychiatrist for a few months (original diagnosis was severe depression, bulimia and bouts of self-harm) and after I discovered BPD, I broached the subject with him. The thing is, doctors in Ireland (and he told me this himself) aren't very clued up about personality disorders. They haven't advanced to the stage of commonly diagnosing them - apparently they're quite rare here. After a few more sessions and extra research on his behalf, he felt confident in confirming that I did indeed have BPD.

So guys if you're ever in doubt about any diagnosis you've received, don't be afraid to do your own research, share your feelings with your doctor or psychiatrist or even seek a second opinion! It can make a huge difference to understand exactly what you're dealing with.

for anyone having a tough time right now.

Ardennes1944 · 31-05-2010 9:09pm

i dont think so. and thats truly only because of music. it picks me up on even the darkest of days. its all the medicine i need for sadness

Novella · 31-05-2010 9:34pm

I'm with Hotaru 100%.

In the last five years, I've found treatment of mental illness in this country to be extremely poor. I was on a waiting list for over a year to see a consultant psychiatrist and my case was marked as 'urgent', but I was still left hanging.

It's really easy to lose faith and to give up because when you are constantly fobbed off with promises of this and that, when you're given prescriptions so easily and pretty much left to your own devices so often, it starts to feel like no one actually wants to help you.

All I can say to anyone is, do not give up. I've seen so many different doctors at this stage and today, my usual GP was away so I saw a different one. I just popped in to renew my sleeping pill prescription but we ended up having a huge chat and I left feeling a million times better.

I think there are a lot of GP's who just aren't too sure what exactly they're supposed to do, what they're supposed to say etc., so if you ever feel like you're being let down by your GP, see another one, and another one. It is kind of understandable that it's hard for a GP to know what to do but I think by now, considering the rise of mental illness in this country, they should be able to do more than scribble a prescription for whatever anti-depressant and send you on your way, not even monitoring your reaction to the drug.

This wasn't meant to be a huge moan about GP's, it was meant to be an up-lifting post about not giving up! Ooops!

As for the researching your own diagnosis thing, I agree. When I read over my blog one night, I noticed how up and down my moods were. One day, I'd write a lovely, happy blog and the next, I'd be so down. I said to my psychiatrist that I was worried about my unstable mood, how rapidly I cycled between feeling up, although always very irritable and feeling absolutely terrible. It was only then I was diagnosed as being bi-polar.

Anyway, this is one of the up days so just to anyone suffering from any kind of mental illness, it can get better so even if you feel like it won't, don't let it get the better of you.

D4RK ONION · 31-05-2010 10:35pm

Having gotten to know Hotaru, I'm so grateful for being mental illness free. She has gone through so much, she's probably the bravest person I know. It's something I always took for granted, but never again.

KnifeWRENCH · 31-05-2010 10:40pm

i just want to say that i have so much

for hotaru and novella right now. those were two exceptional posts; your honesty and courage is really inspiring.

Konata · 31-05-2010 10:48pm

Thanks guys. Much

.

I guess I just don't see why mental illness should be shameful in anyway. When we break an arm or have the flu, we've no problem with telling people whats wrong with us. I understand that mental illness is slightly different, but in my view it shouldn't make a difference. I'm sick, I'm trying to get better - end of.

I talk openly about my problems, not because I crave attention, but because I believe it's a great way to deal with them. I hope to encourage other people to come forward with their own issues - be them big or small. Bottling things up is not the solution, trust me. Anyone who looks at you differently, solely because you suffer from some form of mental illness, is not worth your time.

degausserxo · 01-06-2010 2:27am

Long post alert!

It seems like the only way to get anywhere within the mental health system in this country is to diagnose yourself. At the beginning of April I was hospitalized because of another bout of severe psychosis - I was having auditory and visual hallucinations, paranoid delusions, the lot. After seeing a few different psychiatrists, (there's something seriously sadistic about giving someone a psychiatric evaluation at 4 a.m. - the only time someone was free, apparently) a few days after being released, one eventually told me to 'look this up on the internet and see if that's what it is'. Eh, no, it's your job to tell me what's wrong with me, not the fúcking internet's. The guy was completely discouraging to the point where he took phone calls during the appointment, and thought that I was suffering from Dissociative Identity Disorder (think Tyler Durden) - absolutely nothing like what I had been experiencing.

I'm still in the midst of a proper diagnosis. There's been talk of bipolar disorder and schizophrenia, but nothing solid can be established at the moment. I began taking Seroquel, an anti-psychotic, but the auditory hallucinations have still occurred, albeit somewhat infrequently, and when they do I have panic attacks, and eventually revert back to self harm, something I've been doing since the age of nine. They can happen anywhere - a couple of weeks ago I was with my mam in a cafe, and burst into tears in the middle of ordering a coffee because of the auditory hallucinations (going into detail here would make me sound like a proper nut!), and I literally cannot go anywhere on my own. I have to leave the door open when I take a shower. I can't stay in my room for too long on my own. If I want to go to town or to the shop I have to have my mother or a certain friend with me; a constant babysitter all the fúcking time. It's gotten to the point where my parents have had to cancel their holiday to look after me.

I was taken off Seroquel four days ago, because I thought that they were making no difference, and put on Effexor, an anti-depressant. It's only now without Seroquel that I can see that I needed them.. I feel constantly on edge, I can't sleep, I'm becoming increasingly more paranoid. I did a bit of research and found that that particular drug isn't intended for use in patients who present with psychosis, as it can induce it. I can't be seen by my psychiatrist for another four weeks, and he is adamant that I stay on these tablets until then. I'm absolutely terrified that I'll continue seeing and hearing things, and that they'll get worse.

There are two particular.. illnesses, disorders, whatever you want to call them, that I see striking similarities with myself in, but to be honest, I've become so disheartened at this stage that I don't know whether I should bring them to their attention or not, because I don't feel that I'll be taken seriously.. or what if I'm completely wrong?

Big props to Hotaru and Novella. I've read both of their blogs and just.. wow. They inspired me to start my own, which I thought might help me come to terms with things myself, but I took it down within hours. Had it not've been for their courage in sharing with you, I definitely wouldn't have written this.

So I'm still of the opinion that the mental healthcare system in this country is a sham. This may have already been mentioned somewhere on this thread, or on someone's blog, but sure I'll say it again - 239 people died on Irish roads last year. There were 500 odd suicides. The amount of money spent on road safety campaigns in comparison to suicide prevention is unreal -

''Since 2005, road safety has received €105.5m in funds. This compares with the €10.8m for suicide prevention.
In each of the years, however, suicide deaths averaged nearly 100 more than those on the road.''

Just.... agh.

Novella · 01-06-2010 2:20pm

Degausserxo, (so weird calling you that, seeing as I know your real name and called you by that first :pac:) don't become disheartened. I know it's all too easy, and I know how difficult it is to get a diagnosis and how it feels like you're going nowhere but eventually, things will come together for you.

You just always need to remember that you're stronger than your illness, even though most of the time (for me anyway), it feels like it'd be simpler to let it get the better of you.

When you do find someone who can and/or will fully diagnose you, it is only then that the road to recovery begins. I have spent years undiagnosed, or just classed as 'severely depressed' and been on all kinds of medications, most of them wrong for me. You will get to the stage when you're put on a medication that works for you, and you'll be proud that you hung in there.

The only good thing I can really see at this point in time, in being mentally ill, are the friends I have made. I've met people in out-patient programmes I've attended and it's been so wonderful to know I had the support of other people who really knew and understood me. Also, from writing my blog, and getting to know (in particular) Hotaru, Ginja Ninja and almostnever. Their constant encouragement and less than three-ing has helped me so many times when I was having bad days.

You might not wanna write a blog, but never ever underestimate the kindness of some people. I used to feel alone a lot, like I had no one to turn to. I turn to my blog now and I can't even begin to express how much the support from that has helped me. If you ever wanna have a rant, or anything, don't hesitate to PM me.

Take care of yourself

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-a9atIQTT8

Thought you might like some Dallas Green to lighten the mood!

almostnever · 01-06-2010 4:22pm

I'm just going to come in with a "you guys are a real inspiration to me and big hugs and

for you all", because ye actually rock.

Novella · 01-06-2010 4:38pm

almostnever wrote: »

I'm just going to come in with a "you guys are a real inspiration to me and big hugs and for you all", because ye actually rock.

You rock too

SarahBeep! · 01-06-2010 5:09pm

Yup, was 13 right up until I was 16, still get spats of it now two years later. The parents never realised, never took anything for it. Just let it take it's natural course.

del88 · 01-06-2010 9:33pm

degausserxo wrote: »

Long post alert!

It seems like the only way to get anywhere within the mental health system in this country is to diagnose yourself. At the beginning of April I was hospitalized because of another bout of severe psychosis - I was having auditory and visual hallucinations, paranoid delusions, the lot. After seeing a few different psychiatrists, (there's something seriously sadistic about giving someone a psychiatric evaluation at 4 a.m. - the only time someone was free, apparently) a few days after being released, one eventually told me to 'look this up on the internet and see if that's what it is'. Eh, no, it's your job to tell me what's wrong with me, not the fúcking internet's. The guy was completely discouraging to the point where he took phone calls during the appointment, and thought that I was suffering from Dissociative Identity Disorder (think Tyler Durden) - absolutely nothing like what I had been experiencing.

I'm still in the midst of a proper diagnosis. There's been talk of bipolar disorder and schizophrenia, but nothing solid can be established at the moment. I began taking Seroquel, an anti-psychotic, but the auditory hallucinations have still occurred, albeit somewhat infrequently, and when they do I have panic attacks, and eventually revert back to self harm, something I've been doing since the age of nine. They can happen anywhere - a couple of weeks ago I was with my mam in a cafe, and burst into tears in the middle of ordering a coffee because of the auditory hallucinations (going into detail here would make me sound like a proper nut!), and I literally cannot go anywhere on my own. I have to leave the door open when I take a shower. I can't stay in my room for too long on my own. If I want to go to town or to the shop I have to have my mother or a certain friend with me; a constant babysitter all the fúcking time. It's gotten to the point where my parents have had to cancel their holiday to look after me.

I was taken off Seroquel four days ago, because I thought that they were making no difference, and put on Effexor, an anti-depressant. It's only now without Seroquel that I can see that I needed them.. I feel constantly on edge, I can't sleep, I'm becoming increasingly more paranoid. I did a bit of research and found that that particular drug isn't intended for use in patients who present with psychosis, as it can induce it. I can't be seen by my psychiatrist for another four weeks, and he is adamant that I stay on these tablets until then. I'm absolutely terrified that I'll continue seeing and hearing things, and that they'll get worse.

There are two particular.. illnesses, disorders, whatever you want to call them, that I see striking similarities with myself in, but to be honest, I've become so disheartened at this stage that I don't know whether I should bring them to their attention or not, because I don't feel that I'll be taken seriously.. or what if I'm completely wrong?

Big props to Hotaru and Novella. I've read both of their blogs and just.. wow. They inspired me to start my own, which I thought might help me come to terms with things myself, but I took it down within hours. Had it not've been for their courage in sharing with you, I definitely wouldn't have written this.

So I'm still of the opinion that the mental healthcare system in this country is a sham. This may have already been mentioned somewhere on this thread, or on someone's blog, but sure I'll say it again - 239 people died on Irish roads last year. There were 500 odd suicides. The amount of money spent on road safety campaigns in comparison to suicide prevention is unreal -

''Since 2005, road safety has received €105.5m in funds. This compares with the €10.8m for suicide prevention.
In each of the years, however, suicide deaths averaged nearly 100 more than those on the road.''

Just.... agh.

Great post....Fair play .
Have to agree with you on the funding for suicide prevention...it's crazy(no offence).Hope things improve for you ...they can .
I've had 2 breakdowns and have been as low as you can get..but things did improve and i ended up traveling the world and started my own business....I still have bad weeks and months and it all get to much at times...but i know i can get out of it.
Like what you where saying about the fear of the things getting worse..sometimes it's a comfort to know they can also get better.

sock puppet · 01-06-2010 9:51pm

A problem I had with the mental health service wasn't availability but rather the high staff turnover in the centre I attended. In the brief 2 years I went to counselling I went to three different psychiatrists there. All of them left after working there only briefly. How the hell is someone meant to make progress if the counsellors only work there for a few months before moving somewhere else? Having said that I had access to a lot of services so I'd say I was pretty lucky. I didn't really get much out of it so I didn't mind but I feel sorry for anyone who was really depending on their service.

Ginja Ninja · 01-06-2010 9:59pm

I wonder what's everyone's definition of depression?

For me it's being at the point where you physically feel the sadness and can't be happy.But I wonder is it a mental illness only or can circumstances bring it about as well,more like a state of mind?

I clicked yes,but now I'm starting to wonder if I was right to or not,I've been suicidal but I have a cause of those feelings,is it still depression if there is a definite source of the sadness?or is inexplicable sadness the only form?

I always think it's one of the biggest mistakes of our society that suicide and depression is swept under a rug.There are many many more deaths due to suicide than any other cause in Ireland,the most prominent killer is always assumed to be the roads though.
Call me a cook but I believe the weight is even more than that,I think a lot of the road deaths could be classed as both, cases where someone is kille din a single vehicle crash,they veer off a straight road.They are classd as road deaths,but I think it's not always that simple.

I have a 5 euro a week mobile subscription to Console, a charity for helping those that have lost someone to suicide.It's sad that they are all about cleaning up the aftermath,there is simply too much to do to prevent it.

To anyone who's been open about their problems,especially those with blogs.you know how I feel about you guys,you're an inpiration and made of tougher stuff than a lot of people.Never be afraid to hide that fact.

Novella · 01-06-2010 10:09pm

Ginja Ninja wrote: »

I wonder what's everyone's definition of depression?

For me it's being at the point where you physically feel the sadness and can't be happy.But I wonder is it a mental illness only or can circumstances bring it about as well,more like a state of mind?

I clicked yes,but now I'm starting to wonder if I was right to or not,I've been suicidal but I have a cause of those feelings,is it still depression if there is a definite source of the sadness?or is inexplicable sadness the only form?

I always think it's one of the biggest mistakes of our society that suicide and depression is swept under a rug.There are many many more deaths due to suicide than any other cause in Ireland,the most prominent killer is always assumed to be the roads though.
Call me a cook but I believe the weight is even more than that,I think a lot of the road deaths could be classed as both, cases where someone is kille din a single vehicle crash,they veer off a straight road.They are classd as road deaths,but I think it's not always that simple.

I have a 5 euro a week mobile subscription to Console, a charity for helping those that have lost someone to suicide.It's sad that they are all about cleaning up the aftermath,there is simply too much to do to prevent it.

To anyone who's been open about their problems,especially those with blogs.you know how I feel about you guys,you're an inpiration and made of tougher stuff than a lot of people.Never be afraid to hide that fact.

I think depression can be genetic, and some people more prone to feeling sad than others for no particular reason, but from what I know, it can also be triggered by emotional trauma etc.

The definition of depression is something along the lines of 'a mental state characterised by a sense of inadequacy and the condition of feeling sad'. So, yeah, you can still be considered depressed even if you can list a million reasons to feel that way. Afaik, depression isn't just feeling hopeless and not knowing why.

You're made of tougher stuff too, and I don't think you give yourself enough credit for your strength at all. Your blog is really inspiring too, ya know. Sometimes I'm sat in awe reading it because it's just so crazy how much you've been through but yet how much you keep giving. Lots of these -

flyswatter · 01-06-2010 10:18pm

Don't usually post anywhere other than STYA here. (gotta integrate more

) but all I can say to Hotaru, Novella, degausserxo et al is fair play. You're courage and tenacity to be dealing with your illness's is to be admired.

I guess I can empathize a bit with the posts in this thread. Throughout my teens I've lived a tortured life at times. Paranoid thoughts, delusions (is the news on TV and in newspapers there everytime I read/watch referring to me?) etc. It's interfered with my education. Had to move schools several times. A suicide attempt.

But I've been lucky to have a fine support staff (GP, hospital, consultants and most importantly parents) and consistent medication in order to manage my symptoms effectively.

Things have been looking up for a while now and am well on the way to recovery. I have a foundation of confidence growing day by day (whereas before I let other peoples opinions destroy me). The psychosis has almost evaporated and I hope it stays that way.

For anyone reading, don't let an illness define you as an individual. You are a wonderful person with unique gifts and talents and a recovery is possible. You've just got to believe you can make it.

Extrasupervery · 01-06-2010 10:26pm

I'd describe depression as being in a place where absolutely no one or nothing can alter your perception...when you're so down that nothing can make you laugh or smile at things you used to, where sleeping and eating and doing regular things become a thing of the past. When you don't give a ****....about anything. Specially yourself. Feeling so empty and just wanting so very very much to be happy. Or to not be at all. To just feel...empty. And hopeless. And worthless. And so so very sleepy in an odd way...like a demented heavy tiredness that won't go the fúck away. But of course these things differ in severity and all that.

I agree with the diagnose yourself idea to a certain extent - once people don't get carried away and see symptoms where there are none and play doctor themselves. Some people may drive themselves crazy self diagnosing. But yeah I've had ****ty experiences with many, many GPs who frankly couldn't give a shíte. It's incredibly disheartening when you've worked up so much courage to talk to someone and they basically blow you off. It's like HELP PLZ. ANYONE. No...? Okay then. I'll be over here. Cúnts. But yeah keep seeing doctors, keep talking to people, someone _will_ help. It probably won't be the first person you go to, but don't give up.

Banjo Fella · 01-06-2010 10:42pm

For me, depression would be when I feel so sad and so desperately helpless than I can't even cry. When I absolutely can't see the path that connects where I am now and where I want to be, and when I have no idea how to climb out of where I've fallen, and I'm not even sure if I want to. When I feel nothing, other than a sense of burning emptiness.

You can defeat it, though, one battle at a time! The colour can return to life, and if anything serves as evidence that this is true it's the posts of everyone in this topic. You guys are all so awesome, it takes a special sort of bravery to talk about something like this in such personal detail.

del88 · 16-06-2010 10:44pm

My cousin committed suicide this day last week...
Went up to his apartment tonight to box up and collect all his belongings....saddest thing I've ever had to do....he never told anyone how he was feeling....so if anyone reading this is really low and have lost hope, please, please, please talk to someone ....your more loved and worth so much more then your present state of mind might be telling you...

http://www.aware.ie/

http://www.suicideprevention.ie/

http://grow.ie/

http://www.suicideireland.com/

Extrasupervery · 16-06-2010 10:46pm

Ginja Ninja · 16-06-2010 11:07pm

del88 wrote: »

My cousin committed suicide this day last week...
Went up to his apartment tonight to box up and collect all his belongings....saddest thing I've ever had to do....he never told anyone how he was feeling....so if anyone reading this is really low and have lost hope, please, please, please talk to someone ....your more loved and worth so much more then your present state of mind might be telling

I don't mean to sound insensitive but stop worrying about everyone else and make sure you first of all and then his family are okay.

I'm not trying to be cruel here,I get that your first reaction would be to help,but make sure you can accept it in your mind and are relatively "comfortable" with it before you get too involved.

This is all just my opinion/experience but for the first 2/3 weeks everyone is crowding around the family and they are all trying to help[you've probably noticed it] but it's after that initial fortnight that people drift away and sort of expect you to be getting over it[that's phrased badly but you know what I mean].That's when you need to be sorted and prepared to be a shoulder to lean on,even if it's only as a distraction when you come around for a cup of tea an hour now and then.

It really helps if you can do some of the practical stuff too,I remember one of the hardest things I had to do was feed the cattle,as you can see the spot where one of my brothers was found from the shed.

to sum it up:
Sort yourself out
help with some of the practical things[make food,clear out his stuff like you did,that sort of stuff]
Keep at it,they will still hurt until the month's mind and a few weeks after,that's when you will be worth gold to the family.
Rant/rave/moan/whine/cry here on Boards if you need to,PM me if you ever want to talk,but don't bottle it up,it helps no one.

I'm sorry if this seems a bit blunt or callous,but I know I would have given anything to have someone who went through to give some advice when I lost my brothers,maybe it can help you a little.

M PM's are always open and I'm sorry if this hits a nerve with anyone else

cheesefiend · 16-06-2010 11:22pm

My mam had SAD for ages but we didn't even realise at the time because we were young, looking back though it was so obvious. She thought at the time that she could get through it without medication and spent a couple of years trying different things like lights that shine really bright in the morning to trick your mind its summer. I think she was ashamed or something but eventually she started medication and she's so much better for it. The only thing is now when she tries to come off it's so much worse so I think she's had to go on them permanently.

When she told me about it she said that it was only when she went on the medication that she realised it was no big deal and absolutly nothing to be ashamed of. So many people suffer from mental illness in one form or another it shouldn't make people as uncomfortable as it does.

I have so much respect for people who are open and honest about their experiences because it helps other people to come to terms with what they might be going through.

del88 · 16-06-2010 11:33pm

Ginja Ninja wrote: »

I don't mean to sound insensitive but stop worrying about everyone else and make sure you first of all and then his family are okay.

I'm not trying to be cruel here,I get that your first reaction would be to help,but make sure you can accept it in your mind and are relatively "comfortable" with it before you get too involved.

This is all just my opinion/experience but for the first 2/3 weeks everyone is crowding around the family and they are all trying to help[you've probably noticed it] but it's after that initial fortnight that people drift away and sort of expect you to be getting over it[that's phrased badly but you know what I mean].That's when you need to be sorted and prepared to be a shoulder to lean on,even if it's only as a distraction when you come around for a cup of tea an hour now and then.

It really helps if you can do some of the practical stuff too,I remember one of the hardest things I had to do was feed the cattle,as you can see the spot where one of my brothers was found from the shed.

to sum it up:
Sort yourself out
help with some of the practical things[make food,clear out his stuff like you did,that sort of stuff]
Keep at it,they will still hurt until the month's mind and a few weeks after,that's when you will be worth gold to the family.
Rant/rave/moan/whine/cry here on Boards if you need to,PM me if you ever want to talk,but don't bottle it up,it helps no one.

I'm sorry if this seems a bit blunt or callous,but I know I would have given anything to have someone who went through to give some advice when I lost my brothers,maybe it can help you a little.

M PM's are always open and I'm sorry if this hits a nerve with anyone else

Thanks for that...some good advice there....
I'll be ok...I have a very close family so my aunt has lots of support and everyone is rallying around...
My cousin was obviously in a very dark place at the time and i just wish he would have giving us a chance to help...we would have done anything to get him through what ever troubles he had....a nicer ,gentler guy you could never meet...so i just hoped that someone reading my post might reach out and talk to someone .
Thanks for the offer of the PM....and sorry to hear about your brothers.

jumpguy · 24-06-2010 6:09pm

This may possibly one of the most ignorant (and perhaps inappropriate) questions I've asked in a long time, but feckit anyway:

Is there a link between depression and intelligence?

Pygmalion · 24-06-2010 6:44pm

jumpguy wrote: »

This may possibly one of the most ignorant (and perhaps inappropriate) questions I've asked in a long time, but feckit anyway:

Is there a link between depression and intelligence?

From what I've heard yes, but I bet all the people doing these studies were depressed and just wanted to cheer themselves up >.>

*duck*

Also I'd say it depends very much on how you measure intelligence.
People with high IQ can be completely useless when expressing themselves or placed in social situations, sometimes by choice, sometimes they just lack understanding.
You only have to look at the like of Newton to see how much some of the geniuses in society lived in isolation.
The guy who just recently solved the Poincare conjecture is living in poverty in his mother's attic and refusing interviews or prize money ($1000000 from one organisation alone).

If you define "intelligence" as a synonym for "knowledge" then I'd say you'd find that most "intelligent" people are the ones who spend much more time studying/working than socialising or having fun.

So basically I think it boils down to people being geniuses because their brains are hard-wired different to other peoples, or through tons of hard work (or a combination of both), you could blame either for depression.

24-06-2010 6:52pm

Pygmalion wrote: »

From what I've heard yes, but I bet all the people doing these studies were depressed and just wanted to cheer themselves up >.>

*duck*

Also, everybody who does these studies are statisticians so they were likely trying to justify their depression with a reason other than that they're statisticians. :P

Colm! · 24-06-2010 6:59pm

I've been "low" at points in my life, most of my childhood I was unhappy and moving into my teenage years less so, but I'm fairly sure I was never depressed. Certainly never found myself in a situation where I needed help or medication.

Fozzydog3 · 24-06-2010 7:57pm

jumpguy wrote: »

This may possibly one of the most ignorant (and perhaps inappropriate) questions I've asked in a long time, but feckit anyway:

Is there a link between depression and intelligence?

look up depressive realism i believe its called its sounds like thats what your getting at but yeah i have noticed most of my fave directors , artists , musicians and interestingly comedians had depression

Fozzydog3 · 24-06-2010 8:04pm

Fozzydog3 wrote: »

look up depressive realism i believe its called its sounds like thats what your getting at but yeah i have noticed most of my fave directors , artists , musicians and interestingly comedians had depression

but i must warn you its awfully depressing

wayhey · 24-06-2010 10:17pm

Could we maybe edit hitlersson's first post and put in the contact details of the Samaritans or something? I think everyone's had a few nasty patches in their lives, sadly more than others.

Seriously, anyone out therereading these posts and feeling depressed, contact The Samaritans. They're an amazing group and you'd think it sounds like crap until you actually do it but talking to someone, even a complete stranger, makes you feel so much better, honestly like a weight's been lifted. I was never suicidal or on medication or anything but like I said, rough patch... absolutely amazing organisation, don't get half enough praise I think.

24-06-2010 10:22pm

wayhey wrote: »

Could we maybe edit hitlersson's first post and put in the contact details of the Samaritans or something? I think everyone's had a few nasty patches in their lives, sadly more than others.

Seriously, anyone out therereading these posts and feeling depressed, contact The Samaritans. They're an amazing group and you'd think it sounds like crap until you actually do it but talking to someone, even a complete stranger, makes you feel so much better, honestly like a weight's been lifted. I was never suicidal or on medication or anything but like I said, rough patch... absolutely amazing organisation, don't get half enough praise I think.

There's also some incredibly nice and helpful people here for the purposes of talking with strangers.
Use the PM button if you don't feel like ringing the Samaritans, although there's no reason you shouldn't.

almostnever · 26-06-2010 2:23pm

jumpguy wrote: »

This may possibly one of the most ignorant (and perhaps inappropriate) questions I've asked in a long time, but feckit anyway:

Is there a link between depression and intelligence?

I've read studies that suggest there is a strong link between the two, and others that say if there is a link, it's tenuous. I think it's just one of those controversial things that is difficult to really prove one way or the other, at least for the moment.

Woow_Aqualung · 26-06-2010 11:46pm

I've had depression . What I hated was when people would say "Sure what have you to be depressed about?" and then lecture you about what hardships they have faced. A common misconseption about depression is that it's not like regular sadness, in the way that you aren't rationally sad about something, and can't be reasoned with by comparing your life to that of some less fortunate. But I'm happy with life now.:D

Have you ever had depression?

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