Housemates who lliterally live in their rooms

veryangryman · 05-12-2017 11:18pm #1

Probably a few of you are in that scenario. Drives me mad. Why would you pay rent in a house and not mix with the other people in the house?

Fair enough if you get landed with weirdos or have days when your just not in the mood. But it seems that within this generation, we are getting some deeply anti social living situations.

Yes, wed all love our own spaces and resent that we have to share. That notwithstanding, why not make the most of it?

I realise that a decent percentage reading this thread are currently dodging social interaction with their housemates. Why is my question to these people.

gifted · 05-12-2017 11:19pm

Cos it's 10.18pm and people want to sleep?

Mongfinder General · 05-12-2017 11:23pm

Because most people have nothing to say and I don't want to listen to it after a day's work. I'd hate to come home every day to some arsehole sitting on my couch talking ****. If you want to talk to me text me or email. Otherwise fcuk off

Zebra3 · 05-12-2017 11:23pm

Porn and you know....

LadyMacBeth_ · 05-12-2017 11:24pm

I've only ever shared with my sister and her boyfriend and now I live with my OH. If I couldn't afford a studio then I'd be forced to share and you can bet your ass that I'd be in my bedroom the whole time. Being at home is for relaxing. If I want to socialise I invite friends over or go out.

Kopparberg Strawberry and Lime · 05-12-2017 11:25pm

Mongfinder General wrote: »

Because most people have nothing to say and I don't want to listen to it after a day's work. I'd hate to come home every day to some arsehole sitting on my couch talking ****. If you want to talk to me text me or email. Otherwise fcuk off

Another reason to stay single.

05-12-2017 11:25pm

Maybe you're the weirdo..

TheQuietBeatle · 05-12-2017 11:25pm

Sometimes it takes effort to talk to someone you really don't know well. Also I'm sure it's a matter of comfort - why chat ****e with your housemate who's not your REAL friend when you could be watching a class TV series in your bedroom. It's a matter of perspective.

irishguitarlad · 05-12-2017 11:26pm

Some people would rather go to their room to read and study than sit with other people and have their brains turned to mush by drivel on the television.

weldoninhio · 05-12-2017 11:28pm

I live at home, in the family house. I spend 99% of my time in my room. I get to watch what I want, when I want, with no stupid questions.

Bambi985 · 05-12-2017 11:31pm

Some people value their privacy and personal space and the idea of talking shyte with a relative stranger for the sake of it at the end of a busy day when you've been dealing with bullsh1t all day is not exactly appealing. Or sitting there and watching some crap that you don't want to watch on TV because your housemate is hogging the sitting room and you're supposed to be "sociable".

I thought most people who share houses would've loved those room-dwellers - more space for them to do what they want in peace surely.

Fr_Dougal · 05-12-2017 11:33pm

*looks at thread title*

*looks at OP’s username *

Hitman3000 · 05-12-2017 11:37pm

weldoninhio wrote:

I live at home, in the family house.

One of my guesses confirmed.

DivingDuck · 05-12-2017 11:38pm

veryangryman wrote: »

Yes, wed all love our own spaces and resent that we have to share. That notwithstanding, why not make the most of it?

Because to people who are naturally introverted, avoiding social interaction with people they don't particularly like and instead spending their time alone is making the most of it.

I enjoy my own company more than the company of pretty much everyone but a few close friends and family members. I was always polite and respectful to people I shared with back in the day, but I had no desire to sit around talking with them since we lacked shared interests and their conversations wasn't interesting to me, and vice versa.

It's not personal, it's just that housemates aren't friends by default.

cantdecide · 05-12-2017 11:40pm

I've always had sociable housemates. Lots of movie nights and cooking for each other and made some firm friends over the years. 'Tis lovely when you get on with housemates.

retro:electro · 05-12-2017 11:42pm

Because when you live with strangers, coming home to face them just prolongs the social charade you've already been a part of for most of the day. Sometimes you just want to chill out, fart, talk to yourself, watch kardashians- whatever. The day is long enough without talking shlte to people when you get home too. I only live with one other person and she's a nurse and rarely here so I get to chat away to the bog norra bother. In saying that when she is here we get on great and watch all the same rubbish.

scopper · 05-12-2017 11:42pm

'That notwithstanding, why not make the most of it?'

Because your idea of the most of it is likely banter over beers and TV wherein everyone but you is bored to death.

The rest of us are in our rooms doing our thing.

the whole year inn · 05-12-2017 11:45pm

Fr_Dougal wrote: »

*looks at thread title*

*looks at OP’s username *

Move aside

tomwaterford · 05-12-2017 11:46pm

Because it's effort....like who wants to be dealing with forced conversations etc after work,

And. ....whereever there's a group of people,there'll always be personality clashs which tend to erupt over absolutely nothing and who wants the hassle of being stuck in the middle of that

SuperSean11 · 05-12-2017 11:47pm

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Maybe you're the weirdo..

Bingo

veryangryman · 05-12-2017 11:50pm

SuperSean11 wrote: »

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Maybe you're the weirdo..

Bingo

Your card declination in canada was karma for nasty posts like these. ðŸ˜Ž

greencap · 05-12-2017 11:54pm

veryangryman wrote: »

Probably a few of you are in that scenario. Drives me mad. Why would you pay rent in a house and not mix with the other people in the house?

Because they're renting a room, not buying a seat at your social event.

This isn't Friends, there is no canned laughter or hilarious plot, most people just want to have a ****, regret their life choices in private, and go asleep.

Not hear about how you ran the gas off the electricity and the electricity off the gas.

SuperSean11 · 05-12-2017 11:54pm

veryangryman wrote: »

Your card declination in canada was karma for nasty posts like these. ðŸ˜Ž

This sort of wit is why your roommates don’t talk to you

Agent Coulson · 05-12-2017 11:57pm

I live by myself at times and if I could go into a room away from myself I would.

I can be awful bastard at times.

Ubbquittious · 05-12-2017 11:58pm

TV Series, porn, netflix, facebook. People have technology now to keep them occupied instead of other human beings it seems

I'm not much into any of the above but a lot of other people are. If I didn't want to mix with people I'd find something to do in the shed or go for a walk outside or drink a quiet pint in a pub but most people would rather preen at a screen

Gonad · 06-12-2017 12:00am

Thank god I never had to house share with a load of people I don’t know. Could be anyone sleeping in the next room .

Fortunately I had parents to live with while I was single and they always welcomed me back the couple of times I needed to .

But I would rather rent a one bed and live on beans and water than share with strangers .

DivingDuck · 06-12-2017 12:02am

Ubbquittious wrote: »

TV Series, porn, netflix, facebook. People have technology now to keep them occupied instead of other human beings it seems

I'm not much into any of the above but a lot of other people are. If I didn't want to mix with people I'd find something to do in the shed or go for a walk outside or drink a quiet pint in a pub but most people would rather preen at a screen

To be fair, Facebook is interaction with other people. (Russian bots aside.)

I don't really use it, but it's basically just friends talking to each other, the same as they would in the pub or on the couch. The only difference with FB or a forum like this one is that when you get fed up of listening to someone, you can get up and go make some tea without it being considered rude.

You can also do it in your underpants, which is terrific.

hadepsx · 06-12-2017 12:10am

Stop bitching. You have the whole place to yourself, don't complain.

buried · 06-12-2017 12:13am

People have gone into their own zones of personal enjoyment. Everything to keep you entertained or educated is right at your fingerprints. That's just the way it is. Also, the younger generation have been brought up watching big brother, that jungle show and all that noise, programmes where living and having to mix with a large group of people resembles an embarrassing agro filled idiot contest.

andekwarhola · 06-12-2017 12:29am

The wealth of amusingly touchy replies would definitely suggest a lot of room dwellers.

SuperSean11 · 06-12-2017 12:30am

andekwarhola wrote: »

The wealth of amusingly touchy replies would definitely suggest a lot of room dwellers.

Burn

DivingDuck · 06-12-2017 12:33am

andekwarhola wrote: »

The wealth of amusingly touchy replies would definitely suggest a lot of room dwellers.

It's a thread on an internet forum at nearly midnight. Did you really expect anything else?

Pac1Man · 06-12-2017 12:50am

greencap wrote: »

most people just want to have a ****, regret their life choices in private, and go asleep.

- Rosa Parks, 1936

_Dara_ · 06-12-2017 1:03am

When I first moved to Dublin as an 18 year old in 2001, I had starry-eyed notions of me and my housemates being best buds. I think Friends put that in my head. But you quickly realise that you're not going to be friends with most people. That's why friends are so precious because they're don't tend to be the people you happen to be with at that time, they're not friends of convenience like school friends often are. And that's why friendships often aren't forged between housemates. They're just a random collection of people. Very occasionally lightning strikes though. By the time I moved in with my now hubster, I'd had 50+ housemates. Of them, I am still in touch with three.

J. Marston · 06-12-2017 1:07am

greencap wrote: »

Because they're renting a room, not buying a seat at your social event.

This isn't Friends, there is no canned laughter or hilarious plot, most people just want to have a ****, regret their life choices in private, and go asleep.

Not hear about how you ran the gas off the electricity and the electricity off the gas.

Have you been writing poetry long?

bodice ripper · 06-12-2017 1:09am

Thinly veiled I'm Rich Enough to Share a Flat Where Everyone Has Their Own Room thread...

juneg · 06-12-2017 1:14am

I'm beginning to think I missed out here...In college I lived for 4 years with friends/ acquaintances from my course. We were all good friends and socialised together.
That was pre internet !! Didnt even have a television, lol. Entertainment was drinking and playing cards. The next year I got a flat with my boyfriend who became my husband... and now we have teenagers who stay in their own rooms and only come down to raid the fridge ! At least I have a cat....

jamesbere · 06-12-2017 1:16am

I'm lucky that I've had some decent house mates through the years. I think everyone wants their own personal space, but it's not easy in a houseshare so people spend time in their room.

If someone had a problem with me spending most of my time in my room I'd tell them where to shove it. Not their business.

Ursus Horribilis · 06-12-2017 1:27am

Most people who house share do so for pragmatic reasons, not because they really like sharing with strangers.

DivingDuck · 06-12-2017 1:33am

Another aspect of it is that if you remain cordial but distant with your housemates, you can continue living with them for a long time with incident. If you get too close and spend a lot of time together, you can end up falling out (as one sometimes does with friends), and then you have to endure either awkwardness or moving.

Good fences make good neighbours, as the saying goes.

_Dara_ · 06-12-2017 1:36am

DivingDuck wrote: »

Another aspect of it is that if you remain cordial but distant with your housemates, you can continue living with them for a long time with incident. If you get too close and spend a lot of time together, you can end up falling out (as one sometimes does with friends), and then you have to endure either awkwardness or moving.

Good fences make good neighbours, as the saying goes.

Good point!

SuperSean11 · 06-12-2017 1:36am

J. Marston wrote: »

Have you been writing poetry long?

Better than any of the Adrienne Rich “poetry” I had to study

Vela · 06-12-2017 3:00am

I've lived in plenty of house-shares. Living alone now but I'm looking at moving into one again to save some moola.

To be honest, I either click with people or I don't. And in all aspects of my life, I generally don't waste energy on people I don't click with. Why would I? I find people exhausting a lot of the time and I really value my own space and time alone, so unless we're really good friends - I won't be giving up my time on my own to spend it with you.

In a house-share, there are compromises. You have to have a chat now and then, even if you don't like your housemates that much/have much in common. It's just polite. But there's no reason that you have to be BFFs or hang out in the living room 24/7. I'm not going to waste my eve watching some ****e on TV I don't want to watch, when I could be watching a Netflix show I'm into in my own room.

I'll tell you what I think is odd; people who literally cannot spend any time on their own.

Riddle101 · 06-12-2017 3:12am

I spend a good amount of time in my room. It's like my inner sanctuary. I read, I watch tv or play playstation. It's just easier for me to relax in a place i'm comfortable in. That being said I wouldn't be against socializing with housemates. But yeah, I prefer my room.

somefeen · 06-12-2017 3:36am

I'm the least social housemate there is.
I even avoid cooking if there's other people around. I have many many reasons for this 'odd' behaviour. Here's just a few.

1) I want to just cook my fecking dinner. I don't want to talk about what spices I'm adding or where the vegetables were grown, because I don't care. I'm hungry it tastes nice.
I also don't want to have to feel like I have to explain why I'm just having a microwave meal from Aldi. "Oh I'm being lazy tonight aren't I" and all that to head off your silent judgements, Mr. ****ing homegrown Lentils and oak-smoked salmon.

2) I don't want to chill out where other people can interrupt me. I've usually got 100 things going on my head all at once and if I'm in the room with someone else I might as well not be there anyway. Some people finish work and then 'switch off' some of us switch on and some of us also enjoy spontaneous ****.

3) I have other **** to do. Some of us aren't finished work just because we've come home. Last time I had a house share I was trying to start a business. Getting cornered in the kitchen and trying to sound politely impressed by someone's many many drinking stories wasn't a good use of my time.

4) Once I've established a trend of staying in
my room you bastards make the odd time I am feeling sociable as painful as possible with remarks like,"Oh look who came out of his cave" Exactly what the **** am I supposed to say to that that doesn't make me sound weirder?
Then you'll ask questions as to why I'm not more sociable, and Ill say something polite but plausible like I'm very busy with this thing etc. But then you'll ask me questions about that fecking thing and if I was lying I now need to keep lying and if I was telling the truth I'm probably sick of thinking about it which is the whole reason I'm down here talking to you in first place!!

5) If I talk to anyone I might be asked to do some housework

SuperSean11 · 06-12-2017 3:39am

juneg wrote: »

I'm beginning to think I missed out here...In college I lived for 4 years with friends/ acquaintances from my course. We were all good friends and socialised together.
That was pre internet !! Didnt even have a television, lol. Entertainment was drinking and playing cards. The next year I got a flat with my boyfriend who became my husband... and now we have teenagers who stay in their own rooms and only come down to raid the fridge ! At least I have a cat....

Must regret moving into that flat now

the_syco · 06-12-2017 4:31am

Meh. There's no sitting room in this place. Nice balcony, so can be sociable during the summer.

Current housemates aren't too bad; last one was a coke head which the landlord took 6 months to evict via sheriff as he stopped paying rent after moving in.

Canis Lupus · 06-12-2017 6:42am

When I flat shared we all became a family I guess. It was very Friendsesque. We all socialised together etc.

honeybear · 06-12-2017 6:53am

I was a Greta Garbo housemate.

frag420 · 06-12-2017 7:32am

Because my landlord thought he could squeeze more money from the house by turning the sitting room into a besroom and sticking a futon in the kitchen...and I hate trying to relax or watch tv while the washing machine is on, people are cooking etc etc etc

Besides I bought a new matress recemtly, I am going to get as much worth from it as I possibly can!

Your Face · 06-12-2017 7:42am

frag420 wrote: »

Besides I bought a new matress recemtly, I am going to get as much worth from it as I possibly can!

Housemates who lliterally live in their rooms

Comments