What is your impression of Aspergers syndrome?

OscarMIlde · 05-11-2018 12:47am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

It was the so-called experts who decided to lump us all into the one diagnosis of ASD.
You will notice I used the term Aspergers and somebody pulled me up on it.

Life for people like your brother and those that have to care for him must be hell and I know my life is in no way comparable.:(

I have noticed the state offers little to no support for anybody who struggles with daily life to any degree.
I can work I can drive I can not imagine how difficult you and your brothers' life is.

We finally got a service after going to court. Thank you for your sympathy. I hope my post wasn't too aggressive towards you, it's a fairly sensitive topic to me. Your life is difficult in a different, possibly emotionally harder, way. I knew one very high functioning asperger man who was able to attend college but was unable to cope socially. The way some people with highly developed social skills treated him was appalling. It ironically highlighted the difference between cognitive empathy and emotional empathy.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 12:49am

screamer wrote: »

Jury's out for me on this one. I had a manager once who was an absolute prick and useless to boot. A strange individual who you never really knew what to think of, who would I overshare even though you didn't know him very well, but would throw you under a bus to protect himself. Yep I know, lots of them around! I left my long time job mainly because of how he treated me, and found out later that he had Aspergers but kept it very hidden. I thought to myself, people are literally running screaming out of the management team, and knowing that might have made us more aware of what we could and could not expect from him. He was obviously good at his previous job to get to such a high position, but really lacked the skills needed in people management, and a lot of us left

People with Aspergers are individuals the strange bit is a trait but the bit about being a prick that would throw you under the bus that was just him.

OscarMIlde · 05-11-2018 12:55am

screamer wrote: »

Jury's out for me on this one. I had a manager once who was an absolute prick and useless to boot. A strange individual who you never really knew what to think of, who would I overshare even though you didn't know him very well, but would throw you under a bus to protect himself. Yep I know, lots of them around! I left my long time job mainly because of how he treated me, and found out later that he had Aspergers but kept it very hidden. I thought to myself, people are literally running screaming out of the management team, and knowing that might have made us more aware of what we could and could not expect from him. He was obviously good at his previous job to get to such a high position, but really lacked the skills needed in people management, and a lot of us left

That sounds extraordinarily manipulative for someone with Asperger syndrome.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 12:57am

OscarMIlde wrote: »

We finally got a service after going to court. Thank you for your sympathy. I hope my post wasn't too aggressive towards you, it's a fairly sensitive topic to me. Your life is difficult in a different, possibly emotionally harder, way. I knew one very high functioning asperger man who was able to attend college but was unable to cope socially. The way some people with highly developed social skills treated him was appalling. It ironically highlighted the difference between cognitive empathy and emotional empathy.

Your point in red it is a disgrace you had to take things so far.
People wonder why I am so vocal in threads about free houses being refused by people during a homeless crisis because they do not have stables for their illegal animals.
This county is so unfair.

Your sentence in green don't be silly.;)

Calhoun · 05-11-2018 2:30am

Wibbs wrote: »

Nail on the head describing those folks I know C. As if they need input coming across in an orderly queue of sorts, rather than as a mob coming across all at once?

Funny enough C I would go batshit crazy(well...more than usual...) if I didn't have the noise mob coming in from every direction. I need the input, and output. The more input and output I have, the "calmer", or at least more content I am*.

*as we speak I have fifteen tabs open across two browsers, engaging with three ongoing convos, while I have a film on in the background that I jump in and out of(German flic "A Woman in Berlin". Good flic too.) while dipping into my iTunes playlist, with two books bookmarked and in play every so often, and a convo on WhatsApp.

Imagine just having you one program on and it overloading you. My daughter could watch one program of something she likes and just start stimming like crazy, its bad at the moment as she is pulling at her hair and a bald patch on a 5 year old doesnt help.

People not on the spectrum are better suited to sensory overload although they can suffer from it, anxiety is prime example as its the fight/flight being triggered.

Calhoun · 05-11-2018 2:32am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

Your point in red it is a disgrace you had to take things so far.
People wonder why I am so vocal in threads about free houses being refused by people during a homeless crisis because they do not have stables for their illegal animals.
This county is so unfair.

Your sentence in green don't be silly.;)

Its crazy right now, occupational therapy and most other services in the midlands and probably around the country are currently on a 2 year waiting list. We are going to have a real problem in a few years if they don't get a handle on the health system allot of kids will be left behind.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 2:34am

Calhoun wrote: »

Imagine just having you one program on and it overloading you. My daughter could watch one program of something she likes and just start stimming like crazy, its bad at the moment as she is pulling at her hair and a bald patch on a 5 year old doesnt help.

People not on the spectrum are better suited to sensory overload although they can suffer from it, anxiety is prime example as its the fight/flight being triggered.

Trichotillomania (TTM), also known as hair pulling disorder.

I suffer from this too.

05-11-2018 2:35am

oh dear. someone who doesn’t have a clue whinging about people with an illness they can’t help. Lovely. :rolleyes:

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 2:36am

Shaun Cold StairwellMGS wrote: »

oh dear. someone who doesn’t have a clue whinging about people with an illness they can’t help. Lovely. :rolleyes:

What are you talking about?

Also, Aspergers is not an illness.

05-11-2018 2:40am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

What are you talking about?

Also, Aspergers is not an illness.

The OP.

and what would you call it then? A gift from god?

Calhoun · 05-11-2018 2:40am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

Trichotillomania (TTM), also known as hair pulling disorder.

I suffer from this too.

Yah this is pretty much whats happening with her. Good video, my wife would know the technical terms for it but i am just a layman so didnt know exactly what it was called.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 2:40am

Shaun Cold StairwellMGS wrote: »

The OP.

and what would you call it then? A gift from god?

Read the whole thread.

Calhoun · 05-11-2018 2:41am

Shaun Cold StairwellMGS wrote: »

The OP.

and what would you call it then? A gift from god?

The OP has aspergers, he was just trying to start debate.

05-11-2018 2:41am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

Read the whole thread.

I don’t need to read the thread to arrive at the conclusion your OP is a fcuking joke.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 2:42am

Calhoun wrote: »

Yah this is pretty much whats happening with her. Good video, my wife would know the technical terms for it but i am just a layman so didnt know exactly what it was called.

Was pulling my eyelashes for years managed to stop with the eyelashes at least.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 2:42am

Shaun Cold StairwellMGS wrote: »

I don’t need to read the thread to arrive at the conclusion your OP is a fcuking joke.

Not going to explain something your too lazy to read.

sullivlo · 05-11-2018 2:45am

Shaun Cold StairwellMGS wrote: »

I don’t need to read the thread to arrive at the conclusion your OP is a fcuking joke.

OP has Aspergers. Started click bait thread to start discussion. Read the thread before casting judgement.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 2:49am

sullivlo wrote: »

OP has Aspergers. Started click bait thread to start discussion. Read the thread before casting judgement.

And it worked I discovered a number of people affected by this issue.
I also discovered most people are decent and will not stand for ignorance.
3 people thanked that original post but 48 thanked the post calling it out which is really encouraging.

Thanks.:)

Calhoun · 05-11-2018 2:53am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

Was pulling my eyelashes for years managed to stop with the eyelashes at least.

Thankfully we are not at that stage yet, its weird right now she is in between stimming phases.

Did it take long for you to learn to control it better in public ect? I assume its a constant struggle as its more a reflex than anything.

Grayditch · 05-11-2018 2:53am

You've gone about this arseways.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 2:56am

Grayditch wrote: »

You've gone about this arseways.

First, five pages were a trainwreck but it has developed into a decent conversation will some deep meaningful and sad posts exchanged.

You jumped from page one to the last page without reading anything in-between.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 2:59am

Calhoun wrote: »

Thankfully we are not at that stage yet, its weird right now she is in between stimming phases.

Did it take long for you to learn to control it better in public ect? I assume its a constant struggle as its more a reflex than anything.

Yes, it took many years also it is not just a reflex people on the spectrum have hypersensitivity some hair follicles can send an irritating signal to the brain or be itchy.

Calhoun · 05-11-2018 3:11am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

Yes, it took many years also it is not just a reflex people on the spectrum have hypersensitivity some hair follicles can send an irritating signal to the brain or be itchy.

Interesting i didn't know that.

I hope you overcome allot of your self esteem issues, as someone who has had similar i know how hard that stuff can be but to then add a communications issues on top of it it must have been really hard.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 3:13am

Grayditch wrote: »

You've gone about this arseways.

Wanted to see what people were really thinking.
Only 3 people thanked that Gods knows why they did.:rolleyes:

50 people thanked this which is very encouraging.

I now know 3 posters on here to avoid but for 3 bad ones, there are 50 goods ones.

My post was click bait and an experiment to find out what people were really thinking.

Grayditch · 05-11-2018 3:13am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

First, five pages were a trainwreck but it has developed into a decent conversation will some deep meaningful and sad posts exchanged.

You jumped from page one to the last page without reading anything in-between.

And how do you know you didn't hurt a lot of parents who read your post and logged off the thread feeling awful? I get that your happy calling the shots on how this all goes but I stand by what I said.

05-11-2018 3:23am

Grayditch wrote: »

And how do you know you didn't hurt a lot of parents who read your post and logged off the thread feeling awful? I get that your happy calling the shots on how this all goes but I stand by what I said.

I only read the first few pages but if OP has Asperger's, like he said, then isn't what you just wrote pretty much the cliché thing someone with Asperger's does without meaning to?

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 3:23am

Grayditch wrote: »

And how do you know you didn't hurt a lot of parents who read your post and logged off the thread feeling awful? I get that your happy calling the shots on how this all goes but I stand by what I said.

I didn't know and until you said that it did not occur to me.
Spend my life making social gaffs without meaning to and I know I meant no harm so I ain't going to apologise or feel guilty.

Spent enough of my life replaying social mistakes and gaffs in my head and feeling awful.
In fact, it has caused suicidal thoughts many times.

I know I meant no harm so I am not got to worry torture myself or give a fcuk anymore.

Grayditch · 05-11-2018 3:25am

Sure listen..if the end justified the means, don't even worry about it.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 3:27am

Grayditch wrote: »

Sure listen..if the end justified the means, don't even worry about it.

I said it did not occur to me or enter my mind what part of this do you not understand?:rolleyes:

Grayditch · 05-11-2018 3:30am

I'm not having trouble with any of it. I don't like this style of conversation-sparking, so I said that.

05-11-2018 3:35am

Anyways, my experience of Asperger's is limited to one friend who was mostly fine but could say some very odd and hurtful things.

And a new girl at work could have it as well since she's managed to insult a few of us in the couple of days she's been here, and she's seemingly unable to actually converse and take what you say into account before continuing to talk.

I'm honestly not sure because I don't know enough about it. Extremely dizsy and generally panicky, or Asperger's. She dropped her full coffee mug in the corner and she just left it there smashed with coffee everywhere for the whole day as if that's perfectly normal behaviour.

Grayditch · 05-11-2018 3:38am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

Your one of the worse kind of people I have hated dealing with in my life.
You assign intentions and motivations to my words that were never intended nor that even occurred to me.

But I think your intentions and motivations were good and still stand by what I said about the way you did it and neither of us have to be sorry.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 3:40am

Deleted User wrote: »

Anyways, my experience of Asperger's is limited to one friend who was mostly fine but could say some very odd and hurtful things.

And a new girl at work could have it as well since she's managed to insult a few of us in the couple of days she's been here, and she's seemingly unable to actually converse and take what you say into account before continuing to talk.

I'm honestly not sure because I don't know enough about it. Extremely dizsy and generally panicky, or Asperger's. She dropped her full coffee mug in the corner and she just left it there smashed with coffee everywhere for the whole day as if that's perfectly normal behaviour.

Insulted people without meaning to the attention is on her.
Dropped coffee everybody looking at her she probably wanted a hole to open up in the ground so she could jump in.
Maybe too embarrassed to get down and clean it with everybody looking.

She most likely knows she will not last very long and everybody hates her not a nice position to be in.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 3:44am

Grayditch wrote: »

But I think your intentions and motivations were good and still stand by what I said about the way you did it and neither of us have to be sorry.

Thank you, people, thinking I have evil intentions winds me up but I know my execution is cr*p.

ToddyDoody · 05-11-2018 3:54am

I'm someone who finds merit in the myers briggs personality type survey. This is the survey concerned with the extrovert / introvert personality types etc. I joined the facebook group on my particularly personality type - intj. (I wont go into what it means)

Supposedly, given the characteristics of this type, one of the most frequently asked questions is whether this personality type is almost akin to aspergers, as preferences for social events tends to be low on the list. These questions are dismissed fairly quickly now but still persist somewhat.

Something about intj personality type to note concerns the inter peronal and intra personal. Inter being the things that happen between people, intra being the things that happen within a person. Someone's soul might be an intra personal affairs, while a sports event is an inter personal affair. You find that intjs have a lot of intra personal stuff going on but comparitively less inter personal stuff. I find the intra side is how I'm connected with humanity, via soul, the depths of the ancients etc. and keep a minimal inter personal presence of people, places and things.

For people with aspergers, autism we know that they are somewhat cut off from the interpersonal but I'd love to know what are the things that do make an aspie feel connected with the world.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 4:00am

ToddyDoody wrote: »

For people with aspergers, autism we know that they are somewhat cut off from the interpersonal but I'd love to know what are the things that do make an aspie feel connected with the world.

The biggest autism Aspergers website and forum on the web is called Wrong Planet many including me feel we don't really fit into the world at all and we don't feel connected.

People tell us to be ourselves and that never goes well.:rolleyes:

ToddyDoody · 05-11-2018 4:06am

The biggest autism Aspergers website and forum on the web is called Wrong Planet many including me feel we don't really fit into the world at all and we don't feel connected.

People tell us to be ourselves and that never goes well.:rolleyes:

If you sat in a silent room for 8 hours with no distraction, what would go through your mind?

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 4:12am

ToddyDoody wrote: »

If you sat in a silent room for 8 hours with no distraction, what would go through your mind?

I would start counting the number of tiles on the floor or wall if any count the windows count the chairs see how long each wall is in relation to the others.

After that, I would start replaying events from my life in my mind and most likely stim without realising it.

Edit what would you do?

ToddyDoody · 05-11-2018 4:32am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

ToddyDoody wrote: »

If you sat in a silent room for 8 hours with no distraction, what would go through your mind?

I would start counting the number of tiles on the floor or wall if any count the windows count the chairs see how long each wall is in relation to the others.

After that, I would start replaying events from my life in my mind and most likely stim without realising it.

Edit what would you do?

A very good maths teacher advised us not to spend our study hall time counting the tiles on the roof.

I wouldnt count tiles. At first I'd be a bit restless and bored but hopefully when I wore myself out I'd 'give in' to the situation, slow down into the low energy situation and see what thought might come to mind, possibly get some meditation vibe going. Close my eyes, See if I can sleep / dream.

paleoperson · 05-11-2018 5:54am

I think it's a fake illness and it's all a scam.

Note: I don't want to get into a argument about it which would take a really long time, I was just asked for my opinion and gave it.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 6:37am

paleoperson wrote: »

I think it's a fake illness and it's all a scam.

Note: I don't want to get into a argument about it which would take a really long time, I was just asked for my opinion and gave it.

Not going to argue with you your wrong and I know it for a fact so what the point.

One eyed Jack · 05-11-2018 7:51am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

Not going to argue with you your wrong and I know it for a fact so what the point.

It’s obviously a modern diagnosis which pathologises what would previously have been considered normal human behaviour. That’s not to suggest people who are diagnosed with the condition are faking it, but making the point that the criteria for the diagnosis of the condition are so broad that practically anyone could be diagnosed with aspergers syndrome.

One of the things I constantly hear promoted about the disorder is the observation that people diagnosed with aspergers syndrome are unusually highly intelligent in one way or another, and it’s not from clinicians I hear this but ordinary people who are self-diagnosing themselves as having aspergers, or parents who identify their children as having aspergers or displaying characteristics of behaviour they typically associate with autism. It reminds me of the myth which I thought had been debunked a long time ago when people who were autistic were portrayed as savants, the reality of course being that savants are as rare in people who are autistic as they are in the general population.

The idea that medicine and science are getting better at diagnoses of neurological and developmental disorders like autism and aspergers and that’s why we’re seeing such a dramatic rise in people diagnosed with these conditions, is eventually going to get to the point where what were once considered atypical characteristics are actually normal behaviours that should probably never have been pathologised and categorised as atypical behaviour when they’re as common among a population as they are.

god's toy · 05-11-2018 8:14am

If you met one aspie, you've met one aspie. It's as simple as that.

Hey OP, lets start of thread on NT's (neurotypical) Lets talk down about them? I mean I know a few 'norms' and they are ALL THE SAME.. right?

Sleeper12 · 05-11-2018 9:14am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

The biggest autism Aspergers website and forum on the web is called Wrong Planet many including me feel we don't really fit into the world at all and we don't feel connected.

People tell us to be ourselves and that never goes well.:rolleyes:

I'm just over 50 years on this planet & with time you will realize that it's us that fit in and the Typical s that don't belong

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

I would start counting the number of tiles on the floor or wall if any count the windows count the chairs see how long each wall is in relation to the others.

After that, I would start replaying events from my life in my mind and most likely stim without realising it.

Edit what would you do?

As a child I could tell you how many tiles , bricks etc my local church had. I was at an anniversary mas on Saturday & found myself counting again.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 9:19am

Sleeper12 wrote: »

As a child I could tell you how many tiles , bricks etc my local church had. I was at an anniversary mas on Saturday & found myself counting again.

That also proves just how boring mass is.

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 9:26am

god's toy wrote: »

If you met one aspie, you've met one aspie. It's as simple as that.

Hey OP, lets start of thread on NT's (neurotypical) Lets talk down about them? I mean I know a few 'norms' and they are ALL THE SAME.. right?

I know your being sarcastic but the funny thing is your right.
Inane babbling about football scores and did ya see the state of ya man last night and so on.

Edit and they go on for ages talking a lot and saying very little.

wexie · 05-11-2018 9:50am

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

I know your being sarcastic but the funny thing is your right.
Inane babbling about football scores and did ya see the state of ya man last night and so on.

Edit and they go on for ages talking a lot and saying very little.

I despise small talk, I can't understand how people can talk so much and exchange so little actually useful information or ideas and have great difficulties pretending to be interested in it

Nor do I really understand it or the need for it

Wibbs · 05-11-2018 9:56am

One eyed Jack wrote: »

It’s obviously a modern diagnosis which pathologises what would previously have been considered normal human behaviour. That’s not to suggest people who are diagnosed with the condition are faking it, but making the point that the criteria for the diagnosis of the condition are so broad that practically anyone could be diagnosed with aspergers syndrome.

TBH I'd have a fair bit of agreement with this. Not just with autism spectrum, I'd throw in mental illness too. There does seem to be a push to pathologise more and more facets of human behaviour. This can be a positive thing when it includes people who would otherwise be ignored and helps them, but it can also be a negative when it labels people and lumps them in with others with far more serious symptoms. And people love labels and love to find out they "belong" to one(look at those who believe in astrology define themselves under their star sign). And when they get a label will naturally seek out others with the same label and there can be an element of egging on the traits and symptoms in each other, sometimes to the point where they positively select for those traits, ignoring those that don't apply to the label. I'd bet the farm that if you diagnosed a random, otherwise healthy bunch of people with Condition A and checked back with them a year later, you would find more of the bunch exhibiting traits and symptoms of that diagnosis, where they hadn't before.

CinemaGuy45 wrote: »

Inane babbling about football scores and did ya see the state of ya man last night and so on.

Edit and they go on for ages talking a lot and saying very little.

I've read this kinda thing a lot on Boards down the years. Usually if the subject of introverts comes up and how they just don't get small talk and how it deeply irritates them and refuse to do it.

Thing is it's less about them and about easy engagement with the group. This babble is the social glue that has a major bonding effect in a group. Most people get this instinctively. If you ask them more deeply on it, they know small talk is mostly babble, but it's there as an automatic device that relaxes them and the people they're engaging with. EG hopping into a taxi. The usual "You on long?" "Great/shite weather we're having?" stuff passengers come out with is a near given and taxi drivers know and come to expect it. The social translation might be; "hi, we're strangers, so let's kick off on what is the accepted exchange in this context and depending how that goes we may chat further. BTW I'm not a loony and am checking to see if you're not one either".

Nerd version? It's like those irritating beeps and screeches on an old style phone modem, small talk is the necessary handshaking going on before the connection is made.

wexie · 05-11-2018 10:11am

Wibbs wrote: »

I'd bet the farm that if you diagnosed a random, otherwise healthy bunch of people with Condition A and checked back with them a year later, you would find more of the bunch exhibiting traits and symptoms of that diagnosis, where they hadn't before.

This is a major reason why mental health experts (psychologists mainly, psychiatrists to a lesser extent) don't like handing out diagnoses and labels. It becomes to easy for the patient to live up to the label and go 'well it's not me, I can't help it it's the <insert label>

Wibbs wrote: »

The social translation might be; "hi, we're strangers, so let's kick off on what is the accepted exchange in this context and depending how that goes we may chat further. BTW I'm not a loony and am checking to see if you're not one either".

I get most of that at some level, I just don't quite understand how exchanging mindless facts about the weather or some news presenters outfit is supposed to help me establish that someone isn't a loonie, it's more likely to do the opposite to be honest.

Then again I guess that may well be because either I think most people are loonies, or most people think I am, or both

CinemaGuy45 · 05-11-2018 10:11am

Wibbs wrote: »

TBH I'd have a fair bit of agreement with this. Not just with autism spectrum, I'd throw in mental illness too. There does seem to be a push to pathologise more and more facets of human behaviour. This can be a positive thing when it includes people who would otherwise be ignored and helps them, but it can also be a negative when it labels people and lumps them in with others with far more serious symptoms. And people love labels and love to find out they "belong" to one(look at those who believe in astrology define themselves under their star sign). And when they get a label will naturally seek out others with the same label and there can be an element of egging on the traits and symptoms in each other, sometimes to the point where they positively select for those traits, ignoring those that don't apply to the label. I'd bet the farm that if you diagnosed a random, otherwise healthy bunch of people with Condition A and checked back with them a year later, you would find more of the bunch exhibiting traits and symptoms of that diagnosis, where they hadn't before.

I've read this kinda thing a lot on Boards down the years. Usually if the subject of introverts comes up and how they just don't get small talk and how it deeply irritates them and refuse to do it.

Thing is it's less about them and about easy engagement with the group. This babble is the social glue that has a major bonding effect in a group. Most people get this instinctively. If you ask them more deeply on it, they know small talk is mostly babble, but it's there as an automatic device that relaxes them and the people they're engaging with. EG hopping into a taxi. The usual "You on long?" "Great/shite weather we're having?" stuff passengers come out with is a near given and taxi drivers know and come to expect it. The social translation might be; "hi, we're strangers, so let's kick off on what is the accepted exchange in this context and depending how that goes we may chat further. BTW I'm not a loony and am checking to see if you're not one either".

Nerd version? It's like those irritating beeps and screeches on an old style phone modem, small talk is the necessary handshaking going on before the connection is made.

Might have been helpful if this had have been explained to me and others years ago.

What is your impression of Aspergers syndrome?

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