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Awkward Erections

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2

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    #32
    Silent Runner
    Registered Users Posts: 180 ✭✭Silent Runner


    My awkwardest moment has got to be THE AWKWARDEST!

    I was sharing a bed with my sister when I was 14 or something because we had visitors staying over. I was wearing one of those boxers which had an opening at the front and didn't have buttons to close...and yep you guessed it...it slipped out just before I got into bed and she saw it! Most awkward night of my life.


    PS I was 14 I had an erection pretty much 24/7, it wasn't anything to do with the company;)


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    #33
    Sonics2k
    Registered Users Posts: 8,237 ✭✭✭Sonics2k


    Silent Runner wrote: »
    My awkwardest moment has got to be THE AWKWARDEST!

    I was sharing a bed with my sister when I was 14 or something because we had visitors staying over. I was wearing one of those boxers which had an opening at the front and didn't have buttons to close...and yep you guessed it...it slipped out just before I got into bed and she saw it! Most awkward night of my life.


    PS I was 14 I had an erection pretty much 24/7, it wasn't anything to do with the company;)

    Please please please please post this on 4chan /b/


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    #34
    OutlawPete
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭OutlawPete


    The really annoying thing is, that when you get the phantom erections, they're always twice as hard compared to getting them when you know - you actually fecking need one.

    Nature's curse I tells ya.


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    #35
    desaparecidos
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,332 ✭✭✭desaparecidos


    Silent Runner wrote: »
    My awkwardest moment has got to be THE AWKWARDEST!

    I was sharing a bed with my sister when I was 14 or something because we had visitors staying over. I was wearing one of those boxers which had an opening at the front and didn't have buttons to close...and yep you guessed it...it slipped out just before I got into bed and she saw it! Most awkward night of my life.


    PS I was 14 I had an erection pretty much 24/7, it wasn't anything to do with the company;)

    What happened after she saw it?


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    #36
    Silent Runner
    Registered Users Posts: 180 ✭✭Silent Runner


    And it's one of those things you can't keep to yourself...well most of the time:p

    Sonics2k wrote: »
    Please please please please post this on 4chan /b/
    What?:confused:


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    #37
    Silent Runner
    Registered Users Posts: 180 ✭✭Silent Runner


    desaparecidos wrote: »
    What happened after she saw it?

    She's older than me, at the time she said "Silent runner have you not got better boxers than those" in a concerned tone. I looked down:eek: and slipped it back in and said I had to go to the toilet.

    Awkward night!


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    #38
    catthinkin
    Registered Users Posts: 1,060 ✭✭✭catthinkin


    i thought this thread would be about the leaning tower of pisa :confused:


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    #39
    admiralofthefleet
    Closed Accounts Posts: 15,515 ✭✭✭✭admiralofthefleet


    Kiera wrote: »
    Girls get "wide ons" (™ Wibbs) and slide off our chairs ;)

    or a 'slop on'

    frothing like bottled bass is my favourite


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    #40
    Brain Stroking
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 1,874 ✭✭✭Brain Stroking


    Kiera wrote: »
    Girls get "wide ons" (™ Wibbs) and slide off our chairs ;)

    That comment deserves a comment. Bravo princess!


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    #41
    Pauleta
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,778 ✭✭✭Pauleta


    RichieC wrote: »
    Tuck it behind your belt until it subsides.

    That trick got me through secondary school :D


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    #42
    Hazys
    Closed Accounts Posts: 7,510 ✭✭✭Hazys


    Griffen262 wrote: »
    Mass :(

    To be fair to ya Fr. Griffen, there are a lot of altar boys on display


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    #43
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    I just point it upwards so it rests just under the neck of my jacket or jumper.


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    #44
    OutlawPete
    Closed Accounts Posts: 17,689 ✭✭✭✭OutlawPete


    Shirt collar for me.


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    #45
    ChopShop
    Moderators, Entertainment Moderators Posts: 1,797 Mod ✭✭✭✭ChopShop


    ...just imagine her nak........

    That probably didn't help actually.


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    #46
    joshrogan
    Registered Users Posts: 855 ✭✭✭joshrogan


    If you tell the person closest to you that you have a massive erection it'll quell the embarrassment till it subsides.


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    #47
    dan185
    Registered Users Posts: 769 ✭✭✭dan185


    Silent Runner wrote: »
    My awkwardest moment has got to be THE AWKWARDEST!

    I was sharing a bed with my sister when I was 14 or something because we had visitors staying over. I was wearing one of those boxers which had an opening at the front and didn't have buttons to close...and yep you guessed it...it slipped out just before I got into bed and she saw it! Most awkward night of my life.


    PS I was 14 I had an erection pretty much 24/7, it wasn't anything to do with the company;)

    This post has given me an awkward erection:eek:


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    #48
    HoneyRyder
    Closed Accounts Posts: 240 ✭✭HoneyRyder


    I remember when I was a little girl my 19 year old male cousin was babysitting me. I'd been put to bed and he went to have a shower. I woke up crying after having a really bad dream and he came in to see what was wrong. I remember him walking into my room with his hair wet and wearing nothing but a towel that he was pitching a serious tent in.

    Being the inquisitive little girl that I was, I promptly stopped crying to point and ask 'Conor why's yer towel sticking out?' at which stage Conor swiftly exited the room! :):)


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    #49
    brummytom
    Registered Users Posts: 10,572 ✭✭✭✭brummytom


    HoneyRyder wrote: »
    I remember when I was a little girl my 19 year old male cousin was babysitting me. I'd been put to bed and he went to have a shower. I woke up crying after having a really bad dream and he came in to see what was wrong. I remember him walking into my room with his hair wet and wearing nothing but a towel that he was pitching a serious tent in.

    Being the inquisitive little girl that I was, I promptly stopped crying to point and ask 'Conor why's yer towel sticking out?' at which stage Conor swiftly exited the room! :):)


    Have you sold the rights to that story? I'm sure I've seen a film about it


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    #50
    Bobeagleburger
    Registered Users Posts: 45,262 ✭✭✭✭Bobeagleburger


    Getting an erection at funerals is awkward.

    And worrying.


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    #51
    WolfForager
    Registered Users Posts: 4,532 ✭✭✭WolfForager


    Ah the old awkward shifty movement in a lecture as you rearrange yourself...


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    #52
    Silent Runner
    Registered Users Posts: 180 ✭✭Silent Runner


    I'm not sure if it would be awkward or funny if you knocked someones coffee over with it


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    #53
    stovelid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 27,252 ✭✭✭✭stovelid


    rarnes1 wrote: »
    Getting an erection at funerals is awkward.

    And worrying.

    It's grand. They hammer down the lid.


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    #54
    HoneyRyder
    Closed Accounts Posts: 240 ✭✭HoneyRyder


    brummytom wrote: »
    Have you sold the rights to that story? I'm sure I've seen a film about it

    I certainly hope not, that would be all sorts of wrong! (:


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    #55
    Horse_box
    Registered Users Posts: 357 ✭✭Horse_box


    I had an embarassing erection incident when I was in secondary school. We had this absolute sexy wan of a french teacher, she used to wear the tightest jean/suit trousers and she had the best arse I've ever seen, it really was a sight to behold

    Every time she wrote on the board I would get a good look in and on this occasion my third arm of justice rose like he had never rose before, we're talking rock solid zipper ripper territory

    Anyway, when she turned around she had the great idea that myself and the fella beside me should go up to the top of the class and fill in the blanks that she had left on the board. At first, I said I didn't know the answer so there was no point of me going up but oh no, she insisted

    So I eventually stood up and shuffled up the aisle,my face glowing red as I quickly scribbled in the answer on the board. I then turned around and shuffled back to my seat thinking I had saved grace only to have my hopes dashed by one of the lads who shouted ''I know this is French class and all but we wern't expecting the Eiffel Tower!''

    :o


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    #56
    deathrider
    Registered Users Posts: 3,699 ✭✭✭deathrider


    cosmicfart wrote: »
    My story today begins with a female


    All good stories start with a girl... Especially stories about hard-ons.


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    #57
    barbarians
    Registered Users Posts: 833 ✭✭✭barbarians


    Horse_box wrote: »
    I had an embarassing erection incident when I was in secondary school. We had this absolute sexy wan of a french teacher, she used to wear the tightest jean/suit trousers and she had the best arse I've ever seen, it really was a sight to behold


    :o

    There's an Irish and P.E. teacher in my school (I'm still in 5th Year) and she must our version of your sexy teacher.

    She is an absolute stunner of a woman, and has the best arse in the whole school and best I've ever seen. She wears unbelievable (tight) pants too, and all us lads would be scrambling for the place directly behind said teacher when were doing warm up stretches in PE.

    Anyway one lad got a bit overexcited about it got a fairly noticeable erection and three girls were the first to notice then told me another another lad who started to sing "I'm horny,horny,horny" behind his back which had the lot of us rolling around on the ground laughing yet the whole time your man was completey oblivious to his erection.
    :P


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    #58
    Snakeblood
    Registered Users Posts: 4,466 ✭✭✭Snakeblood


    brummytom wrote: »
    The worst is getting one on a bus just before your stop. Not fun.

    Stop having a tug on the bus?


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    #59
    phill106
    Registered Users Posts: 6,810 ✭✭✭phill106


    barbarians wrote: »
    There's an Irish and P.E. teacher in my school (I'm still in 5th Year) and she must our version of your sexy teacher.

    She is an absolute stunner of a woman, and has the best arse in the whole school and best I've ever seen. She wears unbelievable (tight) pants too, and all us lads would be scrambling for the place directly behind said teacher when were doing warm up stretches in PE.

    Anyway one lad got a bit overexcited about it got a fairly noticeable erection and three girls were the first to notice then told me another another lad who started to sing "I'm horny,horny,horny" behind his back which had the lot of us rolling around on the ground laughing yet the whole time your man was completey oblivious to his erection.
    :P


    No way would a fella not know he had one!


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    #60
    Sisko
    Registered Users Posts: 2,910 ✭✭✭Sisko


    Jaysus yeah every bloke has a million of these, just gotta think of something repulsive, theres a real horrible scene in a movie where some guy does a kinda snotty spit in someones soup and then the other character eats the soup (that was even hard to type) one of the most disgusting things I've seen in a film , it just gets me, I would be totally put off my dinner viewing that. I think it was a peter jackson movie from years ago.

    Anyway yeah, just thinking about it makes me feel like vomiting so it easily kills unwanted boners too haha.
    Kiera wrote: »
    Girls get "wide ons" (™ Wibbs) and slide off our chairs ;)

    LooooooooL back when I was in primary school, must have been 11 or 12 I remember me and my friends joking in the school yard "If boys get boners, what do girls get?......WIDENERS" and the term wideners became a constant source of amusement.

    At that age we'd have known very little about how things worked down there for women, t'was actually just a lucky guess :pac:
    Kiera wrote: »
    Not funny when you turn into a human suction cup!

    :eek: Now that, we didn't predict :P


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    #61
    whiskeyman
    Registered Users Posts: 12,564 ✭✭✭✭whiskeyman


    rarnes1 wrote: »
    Getting an erection at funerals is awkward.

    And worrying.

    People expect to see a stiff at a funeral


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