Awkward Erections

Dravokivich

I regret nothing...

FlutterinBantam

admiralofthefleet wrote: »

or a 'slop on'

frothing like bottled bass is my favourite

No.. 'Drippin' like a George Foreman grill' is more realistic.

Fresh Pots

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DmCCd9-AjAc

cafecolour

I always get them at museums. Doesn't matter what the museum is about. Don't know why.



And it's only just occurred to me now that I really should try and visit a museum with a friend 'after hours'.

kfallon

I like to inform my two closest workmates when I get either a semi or a full blown erection! :pac:

Kiera

kfallon wrote: »

I like to inform my two closest workmates when I get either a semi or a full blown erection! :pac:

And your best mates :mad:

kfallon

I think it's always best to inform people when you have a 'loaded weapon'

fakearms123

There was this guy in our school who always wore his jumper around his waist and even out of school would wear some sort of hoodie or jumper around his waist, you could always tell when he had an erection in school because he would swivel the jumper until it fell in front of him, we used to say, Shane what are you doing and his face would go completely red and in an awkward tone he would tell us he was pretending it was a Scottish kilt or something :rolleyes: ... eejit!

Tallon

When you're spooning a girl.... and it turns into a spork...

Awkward!

phill106

Tallon wrote: »

When you're spooning a girl.... and it turns into a spork...

Awkward!

You say awkward, I say AWESOME!

--LOS--

Exercising has a cruel way of making you frustrated.

You start off doing one thing but it always finishes with swimming :mad:

gargleblaster

fakearms123 wrote: »

There was this guy in our school who always wore his jumper around his waist and even out of school would wear some sort of hoodie or jumper around his waist, you could always tell when he had an erection in school because he would swivel the jumper until it fell in front of him, we used to say, Shane what are you doing and his face would go completely red and in an awkward tone he would tell us he was pretending it was a Scottish kilt or something :rolleyes: ... eejit!

aw, the poor guy. kids are so cruel.

has anyone said 'pics or GTFO' yet? pics of men's bulges are all the rage now i hear.

McTigs

MCMLXXV wrote: »

Had it happen when getting a massage once..........

Commonly known as a bone of contention

Tallon

You mean happy ending?

Up-n-atom!

Hazys wrote: »

To be fair to ya Fr. Griffen, there are a lot of altar boys on display

And this is the wood of the Lord (thanks be to God!)

IrishGrimReaper

Back when I was in primary school, we had prayers every morning. The problem was my mind always drifted elsewhere and "up he went". What made it worse was we always stood up praying. I learned like a pro how to pray with my hands covering my manhood. So I just looked like a lazy prayer!

phill106

IrishGrimReaper wrote: »

Back when I was in primary school, we had prayers every morning. The problem was my mind always drifted elsewhere and "up he went". What made it worse was we always stood up praying. I learned like a pro how to pray with my hands covering my manhood. So I just looked like a lazy prayer!

Have you considered wearing pants?

MonkeyGuy

Sitting in the back of German, dozing off, thinking about women (2nd year) when the teacher decides a good way to wake me up would be to answer the question on the board. I was rock hard and didn't have time to fix it, so in a moment of inspiration I grabbed my book and held it in front of the big fella. Get to the top of the room... "You shouldn't need the book to answer that" <teacher grabs book> I wrote an answer, grabbed my book and ran back to my seat. My friend noticed (and luckily didn't say anything) but didn't stop slagging me.

Drunk at a party, got a semi, so I announced to everyone that I was erect. I got a few laughs and a shift... Learned my lesson.

Agricola

When I was 15 or 16, I got a lift home from a match in a packed car. Sitting in the back, I had to "endure" a girl sitting on my lap for the whole journey. Every bounce of the car on the road led to her ample arse pounding my crotch. Ended up pitching a tent in my flimsy tracksuit, which didnt go unnoticed..........

FlutterinBantam

Agricola wrote: »

When I was 15 or 16, I got a lift home from a match in a packed car. Sitting in the back, I had to "endure" a girl sitting on my lap for the whole journey. Every bounce of the car on the road led to her ample arse pounding my crotch. Ended up pitching a tent in my flimsy tracksuit, which didnt go unnoticed..........

So.. you lobbed it into the council gritter:eek:

Agricola

FlutterinBantam wrote: »

So.. you lobbed it into the council gritter:eek:

I did what every self respecting 16 year old does in such a situation. I ran home and locked meself in the jax with a well thumbed playboy magazine.

MonkeyGuy

Wait wait... please say the girl was your age?

vampire of kilmainham

Horse_box wrote: »

I had an embarassing erection incident when I was in secondary school. We had this absolute sexy wan of a french teacher, she used to wear the tightest jean/suit trousers and she had the best arse I've ever seen, it really was a sight to behold

Every time she wrote on the board I would get a good look in and on this occasion my third arm of justice rose like he had never rose before, we're talking rock solid zipper ripper territory

Anyway, when she turned around she had the great idea that myself and the fella beside me should go up to the top of the class and fill in the blanks that she had left on the board. At first, I said I didn't know the answer so there was no point of me going up but oh no, she insisted

So I eventually stood up and shuffled up the aisle,my face glowing red as I quickly scribbled in the answer on the board. I then turned around and shuffled back to my seat thinking I had saved grace only to have my hopes dashed by one of the lads who shouted ''I know this is French class and all but we wern't expecting the Eiffel Tower!''

i bet the lad that shouted that secretley wanted to give you head:eek::eek::eek:

vampire of kilmainham

ol mother hubbert went too the cubard to get her poor doggie a bone
when she got there the cubart was bare so he gave her a bone of his own:D:D:D

vampire of kilmainham

Agricola wrote: »

I did what every self respecting 16 year old does in such a situation. I ran home and locked meself in the jax with a well thumbed playboy magazine.

why dident ya bring the girl home with ya and give her a good seein tooo:D:D:D

LooseMoose

I'll never forget the day's in school dreading for the classes to change or on P.E. days walking the corridors with my bag strategically placed!! It has taken me years to realise every other lad in the class was probably going through the same thing!! It also took me years later to realise I could strap it behind my belt :rolleyes:

When I was a teenager it always seemed to happen a few stops before mine on a bus as well. I remember one time back in the time of the snap of tracksuit bottoms (if anyone remembers them) on a full bus me and a friend were about to get off I stood up and half ripped all the buttons off as an excuse not to get of as I was fixing them.... the good old days!!