Walter Mitty thread

Mam of 4 · 03-03-2020 9:02pm

Geez since when did this thread become the Take Your Best Shot At Me ?

What's a female Walter Mitty called ?
Not a trick question btw

This is it · 03-03-2020 9:04pm

Mam of 4 wrote: »

Geez since when did this thread become the Take Your Best Shot At Me ?

What's a female Walter Mitty called ?
Not a trick question btw

Did you just assume Walters gender? Careful now.

Mam of 4 · 03-03-2020 9:04pm

This is it wrote: »

Did you just assume Walters gender? Careful now.

I obviously did and if I'm called out on it , so be it .

Earthhorse · 03-03-2020 9:05pm

Mam of 4 wrote: »

Geez since when did this thread become the Take Your Best Shot At Me ?

What's a female Walter Mitty called ?
Not a trick question btw

Walter Missy

Raconteuse · 03-03-2020 9:06pm

Missy Walter

Mitzi Walter

03-03-2020 9:10pm

Mam of 4 wrote: »

I obviously did and if I'm called out on it , so be it .

I'm calling you out on it Mam...let's go outside for a straightener .ðŸ˜‚

Leg End Reject · 03-03-2020 9:13pm

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I'm calling you out on it Mam...let's go outside for a straightener .ðŸ˜‚

Mud wrestling I presume?

Omackeral · 03-03-2020 9:15pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

Get lost, sidekick. I think Crisp Guy needs you back at the Crisp Cave to solve the mystery of the missing chromosomes.

Hilarious

Maybe I’ll share my crisps with your chubby daughter and then she’ll call me daddy too...

anewme · 03-03-2020 9:18pm

Leg End Reject wrote: »

Mud wrestling I presume?

Mad wrestling.

Mam of 4 · 03-03-2020 9:20pm

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I'm calling you out on it Mam...let's go outside for a straightener .ðŸ˜‚

Handbags at dawn ,
Winner gets a bag of Meanies

Signore Fancy Pants · 03-03-2020 9:21pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

"Engaged." Alright Rainbo, I get it, I drew first blood.

Actually speaking of which, you mentioned you were in the Irish military before, didn't you? Now there's an organisation choc a bloc with Walter Mitties. Pink faced middle aged men with step haircuts pretending to be soldiers, standing next to purple vans outside banks, practicing their "pew pew pew" sound effects. Dancing around a ping pong table. Hilarious.

Yes, "engaged" as in entering conversation with but nevermind.

Jaysis, sure we don't even stand next to purple vans anymore but we do make the pew pew noises.

No ping pong stuff though....your wife on the other hand...she ping pong long time, ask "Rainbo" :pac:

Woke Hogan · 03-03-2020 9:22pm

Omackeral wrote: »

Hilarious

Maybe I’ll share my crisps with your chubby daughter and then she’ll call me daddy too...

Another crummy comeback from crisp guy, with extra salt!

Leg End Reject · 03-03-2020 9:24pm

I think we need a Boards Hunger Games, named in honour of Woke's daughter.

Woke Hogan · 03-03-2020 9:29pm

Leg End Reject wrote: »

I think we need a Boards Hunger Games, named in honour of Woke's daughter.

She wouldn’t be long hungry around here after crisp guy and “pew pew” keep making a meal of trying to get one over ol’ Woke Hogan. Give it up, lads, you’re making fools of yourselves.

This is it · 03-03-2020 9:33pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

She wouldn’t be long hungry around here after crisp guy and “pew pew” keep making a meal of trying to get one over ol’ Woke Hogan. Give it up, lads, you’re making fools of yourselves.

Aye, she'd be well stuffed after those two...

Woke Hogan · 03-03-2020 9:40pm

This is it wrote: »

Aye, she'd be well stuffed after those two...

Stuffed with crisps maybe. That’s as far as Crisp Guy’s fantasies go, sharing a packet of crisps and then he’ll get the moderator in to do his dirty work.

Signore Fancy Pants · 03-03-2020 9:41pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

She wouldn’t be long hungry around here after crisp guy and “pew pew” keep making a meal of trying to get one over ol’ Woke Hogan. Give it up, lads, you’re making fools of yourselves.

Ah we'd make a meal out of her alright, a spit roast.

Yer in a heap here Wokey. You should probably quit while yer well behind.

We're making a fool of you.

Woke Hogan · 03-03-2020 9:43pm

Signore Fancy Pants wrote: »

Ah we'd make a meal out of her alright, a spit roast.

Yer in a heap here Woakey. You should probably quit while yer well behind.

We all know what you’d be spitting out alright, some of crisp guy’s salt and vinegar.

To each his own, amigo.

Signore Fancy Pants · 03-03-2020 9:45pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

We all know what you’d be spitting out alright, some of crisp guy’s salt and vinegar. To each his own, amigo.

You were the one that wanted a blowjob off Omackeral...not me compadre.

Whatever floats yer goat.

Sardonicat · 03-03-2020 9:46pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

We all know what you’d be spitting out alright, some of crisp guy’s salt and vinegar. To each his own, amigo.

Ah sure, you wouldn't spit it out, would you Wokey, hey?

EmmetSpiceland · 03-03-2020 9:48pm

Have to say, I preferred the “fighting” talk.

Woke Hogan · 03-03-2020 9:49pm

Signore Fancy Pants wrote: »

You were the one that wanted a blowjob off Omackeral...not me compadre.

Whatever floats yer goat.

I’ll give you a while to go back and make some edits to this just in case another lightning fast zinger hits you a few minutes after you put it up, just like in your last post. Fastest gun in the west.

Esel · 03-03-2020 9:54pm

Some good laughs in this thread in the Walter Mitty sub-forum of Military forum.

https://touch.boards.ie/thread/2057831522/1

JohnnyFlash · 03-03-2020 9:59pm

Is that TaxAHcruel dude still around? Definite hint of Mitty off him. The elite survival and self-sufficiency skills, the 3 live-in girlfriends, the vague new-age mysticism mixed with pop psychology, the slightly creepy sex pest vibe off the persona.

Woke Hogan · 03-03-2020 10:01pm

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

Have to say, I preferred the “fighting” talk.

Like I’ve said before, if someone wants to have a pop at me I’ll be happy to get into a back and forth. This is a discussion forum after all.

But I’m not going to take anyone seriously if someone and his sidekick spill crocodile tears about how I talk about my daughter before talking about “spitroasting” her until she calls them “daddy,” or try to rile me up with homophobic slurs as if I think there’s anything wrong with being gay.

All before that same person and his sidekick run crying to the moderators to grass me up and try to get me in trouble. They spent the whole evening trying to offend me and get under my skin to total failure. I have outwitted them at every single turn. I win.

EmmetSpiceland · 03-03-2020 10:04pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

Like I’ve said before, if someone wants to have a pop at me I’ll be happy to get into a back and forth. This is a discussion forum after all.

But I’m not going to take anyone seriously if someone and his sidekick spill crocodile tears about how I talk about my daughter before talking about “spitroasting” her until she calls them “daddy,” or try to rile me up with homophobic slurs as if I think there’s anything wrong with being gay.

All before that same person and his sidekick run crying to the moderators to grass me up and try to get me in trouble. They spent the whole evening trying to offend me and get under my skin to total failure. I have outwitted them at every single turn. I win.

Eh, sorry, I wasn’t talking to you.

Woke Hogan · 03-03-2020 10:05pm

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

Eh, sorry, I wasn’t talking to you.

You looking for these?:

“”””””””

irishgrover · 03-03-2020 10:25pm

Lived in the states in the 90s working for a dotcom. Guy I worked with (Ed) came back from meeting in New York. For some reason I was mentioned during the meeting and when the potential client heard my name he asked where I was from. Ed told him Ireland. The guy mentioned that he was also Irish and that he had part ownership of a castle in Ireland.
When I was told this in casual conversation I asked Ed did he speak like me or like him. He confirmed the guy has American accent. So I told him that his great great great grandfather on his mother's side did not make him Irish, and with regards to part owning a castle in Ireland, I suggested that he might have rented a flat roofed holiday home in Achill island for a week. I specifically referred to him as a "irish american Walter Mitty", I was being mean but in a very light hearted way...
That was the end of it as far as I was concerned until a month or so later when Ed came into my office and said he had been in New York again and told Walter Mitty what I had said. Then Ed handed my something which the Walter Mitty had said was a present for me. It was a brochure for Ashford castle, which it transpired he had bought with Tony O Reilly. I met him a few months later when he visited our site. He was a really nice guy. Born in Sligo to a single Mother, went to the states when he was 5 or 6 and lived the American dream. Went back to Ireland regularly. He was very forgiving of my initial piss taking....

Omackeral · 03-03-2020 10:26pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

Another crummy comeback from crisp guy, with extra salt!

Honest question. When earlier on you said “handed my ass to me”, is this the type of retort you were on about. Because this is the weakest, sh*ttiest attempt at humour or wit I’ve ever seen. It’s god-awful. Really bad. Atrocious.

Signore Fancy Pants · 03-03-2020 10:40pm

Woke Hogan wrote: »

Like I’ve said before, if someone wants to have a pop at me I’ll be happy to get into a back and forth. This is a discussion forum after all.

But I’m not going to take anyone seriously if someone and his sidekick spill crocodile tears about how I talk about my daughter before talking about “spitroasting” her until she calls them “daddy,” or try to rile me up with homophobic slurs as if I think there’s anything wrong with being gay.

All before that same person and his sidekick run crying to the moderators to grass me up and try to get me in trouble. They spent the whole evening trying to offend me and get under my skin to total failure. I have outwitted them at every single turn. I win.

I tell you what Wokey.

You really are in the right thread if you thought you outwitted anyone here tonight.

Goodnight Walter.

anewme · 03-03-2020 10:41pm

irishgrover wrote: »

Lived in the states in the 90s working for a dotcom. Guy I worked with (Ed) came back from meeting in New York. For some reason I was mentioned during the meeting and when the potential client heard my name he asked where I was from. Ed told him Ireland. The guy mentioned that he was also Irish and that he had part ownership of a castle in Ireland.
When I was told this in casual conversation I asked Ed did he speak like me or like him. He confirmed the guy has American accent. So I told him that his great great great grandfather on his mother's side did not make him Irish, and with regards to part owning a castle in Ireland, I suggested that he might have rented a flat roofed holiday home in Achill island for a week. I specifically referred to him as a "irish american Walter Mitty", I was being mean but in a very light hearted way...
That was the end of it as far as I was concerned until a month or so later when Ed came into my office and said he had been in New York again and told Walter Mitty what I had said. Then Ed handed my something which the Walter Mitty had said was a present for me. It was a brochure for Ashford castle, which it transpired he had bought with Tony O Reilly. I met him a few months later when he visited our site. He was a really nice guy. Born in Sligo to a single Mother, went to the states when he was 5 or 6 and lived the American dream. Went back to Ireland regularly. He was very forgiving of my initial piss taking....

Brilliant.

Ubbquittious · 03-03-2020 10:44pm

irishgrover wrote: »

Lived in the states in the 90s working for a dotcom. Guy I worked with (Ed) came back from meeting in New York. For some reason I was mentioned during the meeting and when the potential client heard my name he asked where I was from. Ed told him Ireland. The guy mentioned that he was also Irish and that he had part ownership of a castle in Ireland.
When I was told this in casual conversation I asked Ed did he speak like me or like him. He confirmed the guy has American accent. So I told him that his great great great grandfather on his mother's side did not make him Irish, and with regards to part owning a castle in Ireland, I suggested that he might have rented a flat roofed holiday home in Achill island for a week. I specifically referred to him as a "irish american Walter Mitty", I was being mean but in a very light hearted way...
That was the end of it as far as I was concerned until a month or so later when Ed came into my office and said he had been in New York again and told Walter Mitty what I had said. Then Ed handed my something which the Walter Mitty had said was a present for me. It was a brochure for Ashford castle, which it transpired he had bought with Tony O Reilly. I met him a few months later when he visited our site. He was a really nice guy. Born in Sligo to a single Mother, went to the states when he was 5 or 6 and lived the American dream. Went back to Ireland regularly. He was very forgiving of my initial piss taking....

These are the best ones. The Mitty who actually isn't

retro:electro · 03-03-2020 11:05pm

Mam of 4 wrote: »

Geez since when did this thread become the Take Your Best Shot At Me ?

What's a female Walter Mitty called ?
Not a trick question btw

Walter Titty

Ten of Swords · 04-03-2020 12:26am

Mod

Omackeral, Woke Hogan and Signore Fancy Pants

Don't post in this thread again

Deebles McBeebles · 04-03-2020 10:04am

Well this thread was fun for a while there.

Woke Hogan wrote: »

She wouldn’t be long hungry around here after crisp guy and “pew pew” keep making a meal of trying to get one over ol’ Woke Hogan. Give it up, lads, you’re making fools of yourselves.

Ol' Deebles is stealing this "Ol'" thing for himself.

Redneck Reject71 · 04-03-2020 7:55pm

I don't understand as a parent, that anyone would expose or cheapen the value of their kids on a public forum. To me that speak volumes of poor parenting and lacking in moral fiber. And they should be ashamed of themselves for dragging their kids into argument to bolster their opinion.

DoozerT6 · 04-03-2020 8:19pm

Jaysis I though I'd wandered into the fight scene between Colin Firth and Hugh Grant in Bridget Jones II for a while there lol....

Leg End Reject · 04-03-2020 8:31pm

DoozerT6 wrote: »

Jaysis I though I'd wandered into the fight scene between Colin Firth and Hugh Grant in Bridget Jones II for a while there lol....

Not a patch on the tournament threads though.

Arghus · 04-03-2020 8:35pm

I don't know how how high I can get on my moral high horse because I don't believe anyone who genuinely had kids in real life would talk about them that way in a forum like AH.

EmmetSpiceland · 04-03-2020 8:46pm

Redneck Reject71 wrote: »

I don't understand as a parent, that anyone would expose or cheapen the value of their kids on a public forum. To me that speak volumes of poor parenting and lacking in moral fiber. And they should be ashamed of themselves for dragging their kids into argument to bolster their opinion.

To be fair, I was the one who “dragged” his daughter into it.

Granted, I was doing so to highlight a negative aspect of that old coot’s personality. I did not intend for her to be, figuratively, “spit-roasted” or have any other sexual-based remarks aimed at her.

Frankly, I find the idea of two overweight boards users having their “way” with another overweight young woman, more than a little, off putting.

Redneck Reject71 · 04-03-2020 8:56pm

EmmetSpiceland wrote: »

To be fair, I was the one who “dragged” his daughter into it.

Granted, I was doing so to highlight a negative aspect of that old coot’s personality. I did not intend for her to be, figuratively, “spit-roasted” or have any other sexual-based remarks aimed at her.

Frankly, I find the idea of two overweight boards users having their “way” with another overweight young woman, more than a little, off putting.

I understand your position, but as a father, he should have defended his kids honor ,which he didn't. That makes me feel sorry for his daughter and the life he made for her.IMO.But he chose to involve and humiliate his children .To me that is the worse thing you could do to your child.I have no respect for them,

Ubbquittious · 04-03-2020 11:48pm

How do people know the weight of other boards users now that there are no beers around? This is madness

Leg End Reject · 04-03-2020 11:50pm

Ubbquittious wrote: »

How do people know the weight of other boards users now that there are no beers around? This is madness

We should all meet up, I've loads of free time since I retired 22 years ago in 2012.

04-03-2020 11:52pm

Leg End Reject wrote: »

We should all meet up, I've loads of free time since I retired 22 years ago in 2012.

Delete delete delete ðŸ˜‚

Ubbquittious · 04-03-2020 11:54pm

Leg End Reject wrote: »

We should all meet up, I've loads of free time since I retired 22 years ago in 2012.

If I had a fecking time machine I'd have loads of free time as well.

I'd organise a beers, way down in the depths of west cork during the summer on the beach some place, roast a few sausages on the barbie, pitch a few tents. Only problem is nobody will go because it's not in Dublin

Leg End Reject · 05-03-2020 12:03am

Ubbquittious wrote: »

If I had a fecking time machine I'd have loads of free time as well.

I'd organise a beers, way down in the depths of west cork during the summer on the beach some place, roast a few sausages on the barbie, pitch a few tents. Only problem is nobody will go because it's not in Dublin

I'll be happy to foot the costs, I'm very wealthy.

This is it · 05-03-2020 12:07am

Leg End Reject wrote: »

I'll be happy to foot the costs, I'm very wealthy.

6 figure pension? Nice.

Leg End Reject · 05-03-2020 12:09am

This is it wrote: »

6 figure pension? Nice.

Sure, this is it.

Ubbquittious · 05-03-2020 12:12am

Leg End Reject wrote: »

I'll be happy to foot the costs, I'm very wealthy.

Ah I wouldnt like to see one person footing the costs. Have had camping weekends before where only a few people brought food and the rest of them queued up like homeless beggars for a handout. Once word gets out that there's free stuff going you draw the wrong type of crowd altogether

You know the ones who need a lift to West Cork, drink everyone's beer, try to skip over going to the restaurant and spend the following day complaining about everything and generally ruining it for everyone else because they're too hungover to walk up and down a simple mountain.

kowloon · 05-03-2020 1:40am

Knew a guy who came up with so much BS that my group of friends would share stories he'd told them individually so we could bring them up when we were all together to see how he would weave together things he had told us separately into something really convoluted. He had that essential element of an entertaining bull****ter: he could never admit a mistake or a lie and would just double down with more bull.
He was in his early 20s, worked on a farm, said he had farmer's lung and needed a transplant. Claimed he had a PhD and was considering getting another one. Claimed to have visited 100-and-something countries. Had also worked building tanks in the UK. After he claimed he had his lung transplant (didn't even try to put on a cough) he did what every lung recipient would do and went off to join the Army. Presumably, the lung transplant didn't hinder him getting through the physical for the Army as we never heard from him again.
I wonder do people like this think anyone actually believes them or if it's just an addiction to lying or something.
If anyone here is trained in psych maybe they can enlighten me as to what causes people to end up like this.

Walter Mitty thread

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