Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names]

kunst nugget · 11-03-2014 5:08pm

The King of Moo wrote: »

I recognise all of those words, but I have no idea what that means.

Some D4 head thought she was being given a compliment on the overpriced piece of tat she was wearing by an aging queen working in a coffee shop who said he said he'd like to use it to wash his pots out but his dish cloth had more material on it and that her shoulder blades looked like plates when she turned around.

Split · 11-03-2014 5:31pm

This girls baby wakes 4-6 times a night as per her previous 45 updates- she may as well just drink while the baby is awake -

Can't till bed time for my baby's n bring on madness captin Morgan I'll see u soon pal

BNMC · 13-03-2014 12:49am

Bellend - bludy hel its frezin - 0 likes 0 comments

Bellend - wish my wrk brake was longer - 0 likes 0 comments

Bellend - u tink you no sum1... - 0 likes 0comments

Bellend - soo lonly

- 0 lies 0 comments

Bellend - bastards - 0 likes 0 comments

All posted today. Her little brother has set her status view to "only me". She has just realised this and changed it back. And now all this appears on my timeline.

People really do let themselves down on Facebook.

13-03-2014 12:55am

Muise... wrote: »

I think we had more grace and eroticism down the handball alley as kids.

Handball alley? Never heard it called that before.

Green Giant · 13-03-2014 11:53am

If I see '?' or 'Help' followed by one of those Guess the Emoji screenshots again, the friends list is getting trimmed

yerwanthere123 · 13-03-2014 12:50pm

Legs are abit sore from alot of skipping and running today,so as ye do I rub on deep heat up my legs this is a warning to ye boys: DO NOT RUB DEEP HEAT ANYWHERE CLOSE TO YOUR TESTICLES OR THEY WILL BURN!!!!!!!!!!:"( SOREST THING I EVER WITNESSED. I HOPE IT DON'T KILL MY SUPER SPERM OR MAKE GENETIC FREAK SPERM WHERE MY NEXT CHILD CAN SHOOT DEEPHEAT FROM HIS HANDS OR BURN PEOPLE. GOD HAVE MERCY ON MY TESTICLES!!!

Idk

sinead88 · 15-03-2014 2:01am

"There's no need in girls to act slaggy when they have boyfriends or vise versa!!! If ur not happy, finish it. God sake!!! Stories go back!!!! X"
Lovely passive aggressive status. I'm not entirely sure why the X has been thrown in there.

Insect Overlord · 15-03-2014 2:36am

yerwanthere123 wrote: »

Idk

If you don't wash your hands after using Deep Heat cream, you will have a bad time.

Ihatecuddles · 15-03-2014 2:39am

My uncle died 5 years ago, nicest man you could ever meet.

My cousin put up a status 'my dad was an alcoholic. He drank a btl of whiskey a day. May sound mad to those who knew him.its true. Had to say it'

This is a man who spent weeks at a time at our house and only drank tea!!! And another uncle would have 4 bottles of dutch for breakfast!!!!

ivytwine · 15-03-2014 11:31am

mauzo! wrote: »

My uncle died 5 years ago, nicest man you could ever meet.

My cousin put up a status 'my dad was an alcoholic. He drank a btl of whiskey a day. May sound mad to those who knew him.its true. Had to say it'

This is a man who spent weeks at a time at our house and only drank tea!!! And another uncle would have 4 bottles of dutch for breakfast!!!!

'Had to say it?' What? On Facebook?! I will never ever understand people who air family laundry like that on Facebook.

Sorry for your loss Mauzo, your cousin doesn't sound like the nicest character tho!

ivytwine · 15-03-2014 11:19pm

I may have mentioned my religious former schoolmate earlier in the thread. She bitched about Muslims tonight, and I have got in an argument with her. Sure I'll throw up a screenshot before she deletes me!

(Note: apologies to religious boardsies. I don't have a problem with someone believing in any variety of God at all, as long as I'm not expected to participate).

Update: she replied to my comment with more bible verses. Paint is really annoying on Windows 8, so forgive me if I don't post it :P

Also the other guy replied with 'You don't half spout some bollix'.

marcbrophy · 15-03-2014 11:58pm

People should keep their personal beliefs as just that, personal!
I don't give a fcuk what you believe and I certainly don't want to read all about it in a public setting, like facebook.

Pricks :pac:

michellie · 16-03-2014 12:11am

Came across this on Facebook today ** not a friend of mine, it was shared on some **** of the day page or something .

newbee22 · 16-03-2014 12:22am

michellie wrote: »

Came across this on Facebook today ** not a friend of mine, it was shared on some **** of the day page or something .

I've seen it all now!

EoghanIRL · 16-03-2014 1:20am

I don't know why everyone says Leonardo da Vincis best movie is the Mona Lisa . I thought titanic was klass .

yerwanthere123 · 16-03-2014 1:22am

ivytwine wrote: »

I may have mentioned my religious former schoolmate earlier in the thread. She bitched about Muslims tonight, and I have got in an argument with her. Sure I'll throw up a screenshot before she deletes me!

(Note: apologies to religious boardsies. I don't have a problem with someone believing in any variety of God at all, as long as I'm not expected to participate).

Update: she replied to my comment with more bible verses. Paint is really annoying on Windows 8, so forgive me if I don't post it :P

Also the other guy replied with 'You don't half spout some bollix'.

"I'm pretty sure I'll be in hell with all my Godless homosexual friends so at least I'll have company"
I laughed

michellie wrote: »

Came across this on Facebook today ** not a friend of mine, it was shared on some **** of the day page or something .

I really hope that's fake

druss · 16-03-2014 2:44am

michellie wrote: »

Came across this on Facebook today ** not a friend of mine, it was shared on some **** of the day page or something .

A hoax.

yerwanthere123 · 16-03-2014 3:17pm

Heaven help us all
.....PNG

Paddy Cow · 16-03-2014 4:24pm

yerwanthere123 wrote: »

Heaven help us all
.....PNG

Is that the plane that made an emergency landing on the Hudson river?

yerwanthere123 · 16-03-2014 5:24pm

It is.

shruikan2553 · 18-03-2014 11:03pm

#nomakeupselfie is turning up on facebook. Supposedly they are doing a great thing for breast cancer by taking a picture of themselves without makeup on and making a big deal out of it.

Muise... · 18-03-2014 11:10pm

shruikan2553 wrote: »

#nomakeupselfie is turning up on facebook. Supposedly they are doing a great thing for breast cancer by taking a picture of themselves without makeup on and making a big deal out of it.

Really? I thought they cured breast cancer a while back by posting what colour bra they were wearing - though without saying it was their bra of course. #coyattentionseekingmissiles

Lisha · 18-03-2014 11:29pm

No no, what cured breast cancer was posting status to your wall saying 'I just used my boobs to get out if a speeding ticket' , 'hello diahorrea no loo roll bye bye sock', 'why is no one around when I'm horny', and other such pointless slightly humiliating status without explaining why.
I really do not understand these campaigns

dirkmeister · 18-03-2014 11:38pm

Just came across some of those "selfies" today, my God what a load of tripe.

PizzamanIRL · 19-03-2014 1:38am

A friend uploaded a no make-up selfie and tagged about 80 girls saying 'come on it's for a good cause'

A good cause? How in the name of Jasus is uploading a picture of yourself with no make-up going to help cancer research? The only good cause is that it's saving ye a bit of make-up.

This is hilarious. I just looked at the no make up facebook page and people are uploading their pictures and some are saying 'this is for my Dad' etc. Then other girls are nit-picking through the photos saying stuff like 'Eh you have eyeliner on. That's make up. Sorry about your Dad though' What a shambles

Taking the focus away from the actual goal

shruikan2553 · 19-03-2014 2:01am

PizzamanIRL wrote: »

A friend uploaded a no make-up selfie and tagged about 80 girls saying 'come on it's for a good cause'

A good cause? How in the name of Jasus is uploading a picture of yourself with no make-up going to help cancer research? The only good cause is that it's saving ye a bit of make-up.

This is hilarious. I just looked at the no make up facebook page and people are uploading their pictures and some are saying 'this is for my Dad' etc. Then other girls are nit-picking through the photos saying stuff like 'Eh you have eyeliner on. That's make up. Sorry about your Dad though' What a shambles

Taking the focus away from the actual goal

But now you know about breast cancer! I never know it exists until a new crappy thing turns up every few months. If they cared that much they would be raising money.

crazyderk · 19-03-2014 10:27am

If there is a god, do you think he's up there going, come on girls just ten more selfies and I'll cure cancer!

IvyTheTerrible · 19-03-2014 10:32am

Ah yes, a breast cancer "awareness" campaign, that is so logical it doesn't even mention breast cancer...very smart!

GarIT · 19-03-2014 10:46am

crazyderk wrote: »

If there is a god, do you think he's up there going, come on girls just ten more selfies and I'll cure cancer!

God wasn't mentioned at all and its quite insulting to all the people working to cure cancer by attributing their achievements to an entity that was not involved in any way. If there is a cure found for cancer or any other illness God will have nothing to do with it.

kunst nugget · 19-03-2014 10:52am

GarIT wrote: »

God wasn't mentioned at all and its quite insulting to all the people working to cure cancer by attributing their achievements to an entity that was not involved in any way. If there is a cure found for cancer or any other illness God will have nothing to do with it.

Nomakeupselfies on the other hand will make all the difference...

The guy was taking the piss. No need to get so upset.

marcbrophy · 19-03-2014 10:59am

Oh god, I'd rather they shít in a cup and lick it, than half the mooks on my FB page put up pics with no makeup :pac:

Firstly, there is no 'campaign' ongoing. It's just something someone (prob a bunch of lads) made up to see how many people would fall for it! And they have, big time.

Secondly, even a man like me knows that breast cancer awareness month is October, not March! :P

I hope there's a #nobraselfie one next

Fishyfreak · 19-03-2014 11:30am

"Nothing better when ya doing ya fitnesstest for the army and watching army films get u pumped up love saving private ryan"

RainyDay · 19-03-2014 11:30am

ivytwine · 19-03-2014 11:33am

Fishyfreak wrote: »

"Nothing better when ya doing ya fitnesstest for the army and watching army films get u pumped up love saving private ryan"

Ah sure if the Ukraine and Russia really kick off he might get an action replay with WWIII!

marcbrophy · 19-03-2014 12:23pm

RainyDay wrote: »

Time to find another word

http://metro.co.uk/2011/10/24/ricky-gervais-admits-he-was-naive-over-offensive-twitter-mong-remarks-193145/

Whoops, no offence meant, just the first word that came to mind!

I'll edit mine, if you edit yours!

Pawwed Rig · 19-03-2014 12:58pm

marcbrophy wrote: »

I'll edit mine, if you edit yours!

I can't believe you said mooks!!!! Shame on you :P

cynicalcough · 19-03-2014 1:12pm

From Paddys Day

Dear fellow Facebookers an soon ta be inmates, today is da day, the day ya stick ur middle finger up at da world an jus go fukin mental! I seen one firebargade goin past an I hope it ain't da last! I wanna see cars been rallyed, scorched, flipped an tourched! I wanna hear sirens all day! I wanna see people mashed outta der brain! I wanna see da Garda kept busy! I wanna see da Garda getn bottled, stabbed, bet around wit der own batons! I wanna see Cabra/Finglas Garda station cells full! I was locked up dis time last year, bu I'm free now If ya don't get a charge sheet I'm deletin ye from me page an life.. Happy paddy's everyone love yous all Enjoy

RainyDay · 19-03-2014 1:14pm

marcbrophy wrote: »

Whoops, no offence meant, just the first word that came to mind!

I'll edit mine, if you edit yours!

Like it never happened!

And I know most people don't mean any offence when they use this word or related words, but it does offend some people. Fair play to you for fixing the issue.

ivytwine · 19-03-2014 1:17pm

cynicalcough wrote: »

From Paddys Day

Dear fellow Facebookers an soon ta be inmates, today is da day, the day ya stick ur middle finger up at da world an jus go fukin mental! I seen one firebargade goin past an I hope it ain't da last! I wanna see cars been rallyed, scorched, flipped an tourched! I wanna hear sirens all day! I wanna see people mashed outta der brain! I wanna see da Garda kept busy! I wanna see da Garda getn bottled, stabbed, bet around wit der own batons! I wanna see Cabra/Finglas Garda station cells full! I was locked up dis time last year, bu I'm free now If ya don't get a charge sheet I'm deletin ye from me page an life.. Happy paddy's everyone love yous all Enjoy

I would dearly love for that person to require the services of an ambulance.

I might even assist him.

PopePalpatine · 19-03-2014 3:32pm

ivytwine wrote: »

I would dearly love for that person to require the services of an ambulance.

I might even assist him.

Especially if his balls needed to be removed.

razorblunt · 19-03-2014 3:35pm

Gone from seeing none of these no makeup selfies to seeing two just now.
They'd be better off taking a pic of themself putting a fiver into a donation box.

wonderfulname · 19-03-2014 4:21pm

Friend of mine just got nominated for a no make up selfie and uploaded a screenshot of them donating to breast cancer research instead, excellent response imo.

PizzamanIRL · 19-03-2014 5:36pm

Friend of mine just uploaded a selfie with a donation screenshot. I dunno. Fair play and all but soon it's gonna be full of people showing off how much they donated.

kunst nugget · 19-03-2014 5:43pm

I put up a selfie where I'm giving myself a mastectomy. It was a bit hard to give the thumbs up when I was bleeding so profusely…

Paddy Cow · 19-03-2014 5:54pm

PizzamanIRL wrote: »

Friend of mine just uploaded a selfie with a donation screenshot. I dunno. Fair play and all but soon it's gonna be full of people showing off how much they donated.

I would prefer to see something like that, than the stupid attention seeking "awareness" campaigns that do the rounds every year. Breast cancer is one cancer that everyone is aware of at this stage. Donations, even if given just to seek attention, is what is needed.

Paddy Cow · 19-03-2014 5:58pm

cynicalcough wrote: »

From Paddys Day

Dear fellow Facebookers an soon ta be inmates, today is da day, the day ya stick ur middle finger up at da world an jus go fukin mental! I seen one firebargade goin past an I hope it ain't da last! I wanna see cars been rallyed, scorched, flipped an tourched! I wanna hear sirens all day! I wanna see people mashed outta der brain! I wanna see da Garda kept busy! I wanna see da Garda getn bottled, stabbed, bet around wit der own batons! I wanna see Cabra/Finglas Garda station cells full! I was locked up dis time last year, bu I'm free now If ya don't get a charge sheet I'm deletin ye from me page an life.. Happy paddy's everyone love yous all Enjoy

What an absolute arsehole. This is the type of gobsh!te who likes to romantacise anarchy but if he was ever in a proper riot situation, such as in the Ukraine, he would be curled up in a ball sh!tting his pants and praying for the police to come and rescue him :rolleyes:

kunst nugget · 19-03-2014 6:02pm

Paddy Cow wrote: »

What an absolute arsehole. This is the type of gobsh!te who likes to romantacise anarchy but if he was ever in a proper riot situation, such as in the Ukraine, he would be curled up in a ball sh!tting his pants and praying for the police to come and rescue him :rolleyes:

Tbf, I don't think that's someone that's romanticising anarchy, he seems to be just an absolute scumbag looking to cause as much havoc to other people for no reason at all beyond scumbaggery. He says the reason he wasn't going mental last Paddy's Day is because he was locked up. Certainly a ivacious young chappie.

ivytwine · 19-03-2014 6:34pm

wonderfulname wrote: »

Friend of mine just got nominated for a no make up selfie and uploaded a screenshot of them donating to breast cancer research instead, excellent response imo.

Maybe we share a friend, mine posted up a text message receipt from the Irish Cancer Society.

A male friend did a #makeupselfie, it was hilarious!

coolhull · 19-03-2014 8:14pm

"Making a donation doesn't bring awareness of breast cancer Yes, it helps, but no-make-up selfies are what makes people aware of the dangers. Donate a couple of euro, certainly, but to really help this wonderful cause, take a selfie and nominate someone else to do the same.
Awareness is everything."

This, from a woman in her mid-forties, who should know better.

wnolan1992 · 19-03-2014 8:20pm

To get really meta about all of this, I'll bet all the people who are complaining about the 'No Make-Up Selfie' thing raising no money for cancer charities won't donate money to them. We're all useless c*nts, get over it.

:pac:

Dumb/Great Facebook Status {merge} [No Names]

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