i really don't know how i can help my little princess

suitianshi · 14-12-2018 4:13pm #1

what happened to my baby:

When my baby was 28 days old, she had a sudden big cry (we didn’t this is due to colic at that time), so we took her to Crumlin children hospital. There she was done a lot of tests, blood, urine and spinal tap, but nothing found. Then she was injected 3 days of antibiotics because the doctor suspected she was infected.

And after the hospital visit, there are a lot of changes:

before: her poo doesn’t have smell, so we have to take her nappy off to check if she posed
after: her poo is smelly (very sour, like that of vinegar)

before: i never saw my baby spit up
after: frequent spit up

before: she could sleep on her own and she fell into sleep in a few seconds
after: she could no longer sleep on her own but in our arms and we had to take 30 mins to make her sleep. We have to cradle here and walk here and there otherwise she will never sleep. in day time, we can’t put her down on the bed she will instantly wake up when we do that.

before: she often smiled during sleep
after: i never see her smile in a sleep

before: she never cried suddenly during a sleep
after: she often had a big cry and then woke up from a sleep

before: she was eager to drink milk when she saw the bottle teat
after: she always turned her head away or screamed during feeding

before: she never sneezed
after : she sneezed a lot every day

what she is like now:
she can only sit there playing toys for 3-5 minutes and then she will start stretching legs and arching back, and crying loudly. we can’t even stop her. She can cry all of a sudden from sleep many times during night . She’s over 6 months but only takes less than 300ml milk a day. She has got eczema and it’s still there after one month (we are giving her emollient all the time).
She can have more than 20 sneezes every day.
She can have hiccup very often every day.
She is on neonate with breastfeeding now.

we have tried a few different formula brand and probiotics but nothing works.

we have taken my baby to hospitals, GPs many times but they always say my baby is growing well, she’s very healthy, but we know there’s something wrong with her and we really don’t know how to help her.

We are in a desperate life every day. Tears running down on my face...

barneyrub · 14-12-2018 5:37pm

Have you looked into (silent) reflux

suitianshi · 14-12-2018 5:51pm

barneyrub wrote: »

Have you looked into (silent) reflux

A GP has prescribed us a medicine for reflux, but you know they never listen to us and they do google a lot. I don't know if she is suffering from reflux and not sure if this medicine will do something bad to my girl. she's too small now.

14-12-2018 5:56pm

suitianshi wrote: »

A GP has prescribed us a medicine for reflux, but you know they never listen to us and they do google a lot. I don't know if she is suffering from reflux and not sure if this medicine will do something bad to my girl. she's too small now.

Speaking from a pharmacists point of view. If baby is having reflux. She needs to take the medication.

seamus · 14-12-2018 5:58pm

suitianshi wrote: »

A GP has prescribed us a medicine for reflux, but you know they never listen to us and they do google a lot. I don't know if she is suffering from reflux and not sure if this medicine will do something bad to my girl. she's too small now.

Doctors will not prescribe you medicine that will hurt your child.

It's not going to get better on its own.

Give her the medication.

PirateShampoo · 14-12-2018 6:05pm

So you went to the doctors for help, he gave you something to help, but Doctors are bad and you didn't give stuff to baby to help. So baby still sad?

troyzer · 14-12-2018 6:08pm

Scary parenting tactics right there.

SusieBlue · 14-12-2018 6:08pm

Listen to the doctors, they know best.

To be honest though, some of that behaviour sounds like the sleep regression/growth spurts all babies go through. Even the easiest most content babies go through phases of not sleeping and being extra fussy.
Give the reflux medication a go to rule that out, its the only way you'll know for sure. The doctor wouldn't have prescribed it if he/she didn't think it was necessary.

turbot · 14-12-2018 6:09pm

For eczema, oatmeal baths are very soothing.

If she is sneezing / coughing a lot, make sure there isn't mold / damp in her direct environment. Does your home smell of damp - that can affect breathing and agitate allergies.

My understanding is, breastfeeding is also a good way for mother to pass on beneficial bacteria etc to baby.

Gently stroking her face from middle of forehead, around cheeks, to chin
Then from shoulders to her elbows
Then on the back of her hands from wrists toward fingers

Are soothing also for her nervous system.

I'm sorry to hear this is happening and hope you find the solution needed.

suitianshi · 14-12-2018 6:17pm

Deleted User wrote: »

Speaking from a pharmacists point of view. If baby is having reflux. She needs to take the medication.

Yes, but the thing is, they just say take this medicine and then go back. they're not listening , they don't know what we have went through. I don't know if my baby is having a "reflux"

endacl · 14-12-2018 6:19pm

suitianshi wrote: »

Yes, but the thing is, they just say take this medicine and then go back. they're not listening , they don't know what we have went through. I don't know if my baby is having a "reflux"

Do you know she’s not?

suitianshi · 14-12-2018 6:21pm

seamus wrote: »

Doctors will not prescribe you medicine that will hurt your child.

It's not going to get better on its own.

Give her the medication.

i though this is true before my baby was given antibiotics. doctors should be serious for any medicine but why she gave my little one that just because nothing is found. They don't even know what colic is. They need to google. I suppose they're professional, but they're not.

I will check the medicine for reflux later and see if it is safe.

suitianshi · 14-12-2018 6:23pm

SusieBlue wrote: »

Listen to the doctors, they know best.

To be honest though, some of that behaviour sounds like the sleep regression/growth spurts all babies go through. Even the easiest most content babies go through phases of not sleeping and being extra fussy.
Give the reflux medication a go to rule that out, its the only way you'll know for sure. The doctor wouldn't have prescribed it if he/she didn't think it was necessary.

I will try. The doctors said exactly this :give it a shot and see if it helps.

suitianshi · 14-12-2018 6:25pm

turbot wrote: »

For eczema, oatmeal baths are very soothing.

If she is sneezing / coughing a lot, make sure there isn't mold / damp in her direct environment. Does your home smell of damp - that can affect breathing and agitate allergies.

My understanding is, breastfeeding is also a good way for mother to pass on beneficial bacteria etc to baby.

Gently stroking her face from middle of forehead, around cheeks, to chin
Then from shoulders to her elbows
Then on the back of her hands from wrists toward fingers

Are soothing also for her nervous system.

I'm sorry to hear this is happening and hope you find the solution needed.

Thanks for the good tips, the weather in Ireland is really bad in winter, i will try to warm my room and see if the case can be improved. (the radiator in my house is really useless....)

seamus · 14-12-2018 6:25pm

The doctor believes your child has reflux, based on the description of the symptoms you have given to him. It doesn't really matter whether you think she has reflux or not.

This is very common, and while it might seem frustrating that the doctor appears to be half-listening (especially when english is not your first language), the doctor is not going to give something to your baby that will harm her. He wouldn't prescribe anything which he doesn't think is necessary.

"Reflux" is basically the baby version of heartburn. Her stomach is uncomfortable, she frequently feels like she needs to vomit, and so she is refusing to take her milk. The medicine will calm her stomach and bring her appetite back.

It's very easy as a new parent to get obsessed about every little change and worry if there's something wrong. Babies change a lot in the early days. Smelly poo, frequent spitting up, poor sleeping, this is all perfectly normal.

It does sound to me like there is a reflux problem. Give her the medication. See how it goes for two weeks. If there's no improvement, go back to the doctor.

bertsmom · 14-12-2018 6:26pm

suitianshi wrote:

I will check the medicine for reflux later and see if it is safe.

How will you know better than a medically trained doctor? Give the child the medicine and go from there.

suitianshi · 14-12-2018 6:31pm

seamus wrote: »

The doctor believes your child has reflux, based on the description of the symptoms you have given to him. It doesn't really matter whether you think she has reflux or not.

This is very common, and while it might seem frustrating that the doctor appears to be half-listening (especially when english is not your first language), the doctor is not going to give something to your baby that will harm her. He wouldn't prescribe anything which he doesn't think is necessary.

"Reflux" is basically the baby version of heartburn. Her stomach is uncomfortable, she frequently feels like she needs to vomit, and so she is refusing to take her milk. The medicine will calm her stomach and bring her appetite back.

It's very easy as a new parent to get obsessed about every little change and worry if there's something wrong. Babies change a lot in the early days. Smelly poo, frequent spitting up, poor sleeping, this is all perfectly normal.

It does sound to me like there is a reflux problem. Give her the medication. See how it goes for two weeks. If there's no improvement, go back to the doctor.

Yes， i agree , i will give her the medication for a try.

but what about the doctor giving my 28 days girl 3 days of antibiotics just because they didn't find anything? my girl was even sleeping at that time. Then she said we need to give her antibiotics just in case of infection. There's even no symptom for infection at all. Do you think she's professional?

seamus · 14-12-2018 6:31pm

suitianshi wrote: »

They don't even know what colic is. They need to google. I suppose they're professional, but they're not.

Think about how many times a day you use google for your job. Do you think that because you have to use google, that means you can't do your own job?
No, it doesn't. And the same is true of doctors. Google is a diagnostic tool for them, just like it is a tool for you.

You're making too much of this. I understand that the situation is distressing, and doubly so because you're in a foreign country.

But the doctor is qualified. He has spent many years gaining a highly-respected qualification in medicine and continually has to prove that he is competent to be a doctor. He will not do anything to hurt your child.

I will check the medicine for reflux later and see if it is safe.

You're not a pharmacist. You are not qualified to check if the medicine for reflux is safe. This area is heavily regulated in Ireland and in the EU. They would not be allowed to sell it if it wasn't safe. Read the label, don't use google.

but what about the doctor giving my 28 days girl 3 days of antibiotics just because they didn't find anything? my girl was even sleeping at that time. Then she said we need to give her antibiotics just in case of infection. There's even no symptom for infection at all. Do you think she's professional?

Yes. If the doctor believed that it was a reasonable precaution to take, then it's a reasonable precaution to take.
Medicating a child without good reason would be one way that doctor could lose her job. She's not going to do it if it's unsafe.

Cash_Q · 14-12-2018 6:53pm

The changes you describe in your before/after list are things that are highly likely to have happened at a young age anyway. My baby is 11 weeks old, her behaviour in her first 3 weeks was totally different to the next 3 weeks, and the next 3 weeks different again. They are tiny and they make major developments in their first year of life. If the doctor in the hospital gave an antibiotic to be on the safe side, it will have been one suitable for that purpose and could not have harmed your baby. As for the reflux medication, give it to your baby. It would not be prescribed if it were unsafe or if the doctor did not think the baby had reflux. What do you want posters to suggest here? Medical professionals have given treatment to your baby, that is what you should follow.

annoyedgal · 14-12-2018 8:43pm

So you believe that the antibiotics caused a change on your babys behaviour or harmed her in some way? The doctor would not give antibiotics to a baby that were not suitable and much of the behaviour you describe sounds very typical of a small baby.
My second baby had silent reflux. What calmed her was being held in my arms facing out and i would bend my knees up and down to jostle her. Seemed to soothe her. Also keeping her upright after feeds and spending lots of time winding her.
Babies much prefer being held and sleeping close to a parent so there is nothing unusual there.
If numerous doctors have told you she is thriving then do you best to relax and go with her flow. Everything is a phase with them! This will pass

Moonbeam · 14-12-2018 8:59pm

I had 4 with reflux,1 allergic to milk and 1 with lactose intolerance.
Reflux medicine is mostly harmless,talk to your GP and PHN it maybe an issue with milk/formula.
Reflux meds were our saviour on the last child.

What did they suspect was wrong with her in the hospital?

jh79 · 14-12-2018 8:59pm

Have you tried Nutramingen formula?

We went through the exact same thing, a&e numerous times, not gaining weight, eczema etc. Was down to 200 ml of milk a day before she was admitted to hospital for monitoring. After staying for the weekend with no improvement or diagnosis a nurse suggested that formula.

It ended up she couldn't digest milk but was not lactose intolerant. Just can't break down milk protein, casein i think. The protein is already broken down in that formula. It's still dairy.

After 6 months of struggle she pretty much improved after the first bottle.

Btw we found Aveeno great for the eczema rash.

Wesser · 14-12-2018 9:03pm

She is only 28 days old. There are alot things that she is going to do life that she has never done before. I think you need to take some time out, for some relaxation, massage etc

Wesser · 14-12-2018 9:04pm

If your baby was very irritable, this can be a sign of sepsi s in a baby. Perhaps that's why antibiotics were given
If baby had repair and antibiotics were not given then might be a different story today.

Gimme A Pound · 14-12-2018 9:56pm

Aw, I'm so sad to read of your upset. Take comfort from the fact that the doctors are pleased with her progress and that babies change a LOT in the first six months. Non stinky poop throughout their nappy-wearing years would be heaven. With most perfectly healthy babies it's fecking woeful!

She must be teething too is she?

Reflux medicine is given to countless very young babies - you gotta give it to her. It's not the same medicine as the antibiotic (which I know you're worried had an adverse effect on her, but you don't know that for sure; maybe research that a little more). Also look into bringing her to an osteopath for baby massage that tackles reflux. That did absolute wonders for my friend's baby boy.

Please don't fall into the trap of thinking doctors are wrong. They're not perfect but they are far more expert than dodgy parenting websites and they do care and want to help. It's what they signed up to do.

Gimme A Pound · 14-12-2018 10:02pm

Wesser wrote: »

She is only 28 days old. There are alot things that she is going to do life that she has never done before. I think you need to take some time out, for some relaxation, massage etc

She's over six months.

shesty · 14-12-2018 10:16pm

Reflux mammy here ...Also the mother of two babies who got the three days of antibiotics.

You have been to the doctors and they have given you a prescription.I am not a medical professional, but since the doctors have seen the baby I will say that the symptoms do sound like classic reflux, possibly silent.My first had all of those symptoms.She was 14 months on prescription Zantac for reflux-is that what you got?If sk, it needs to be taken for a couple of weeks before you will see it's effects, as it basically neutralises the stomach acid, but you have to keep taking it in order for it to do it's job.It worked wonders on our child.At about 4 weeks, she started to show the symptoms.Babies tend to be in a little newborn coma the first 10-14 days, and their digestive system really kicks in around 3/4 weeks-or at least that is when they start to become aware od their insides!Ours screamed every evening from 6-10pm for the first 10/11 weeks.She was on Zantac from about 8 weeks.She is now a happy healthy, phenomenally active 4.5 year old, and honestly the Zantac was a lifesaver for us, especially as first time parents.

I can't comment on the skin thing.That may be due to dairy allergies etc.If the child has reflux, feeding is painful for her, so of course she won't take much.

The antibiotics-these were at four weeks??I am saying this now, based on my experience.I was identified as a Group B Strep carrier during my first pregnancy, and I had to get antibiotics during labour.Baby no.1 temp started to go up slightly in the first 24 hours, so they took her, did blood tests and started her on 36 hours of antibiotics.3 days for the blood cultures to develop and show up possible infections-3 days of antibiotics at the same time, in order to kill whatever infection might show up.My third baby also had the same antibiotics, despite not showing signs of anything-I did not get enoughedicine during labour, and my first had tested positive for group B, so they gave him the medication as a precautionary thing.I am not an expert, but my understanding is that Group B strep mothers can pass this to their babies,as it lives in the birth canal. It then can cause a serious infection (eg meningitis) in the baby within 3-4 weeks of birth.However we do not test mothers for group B in Ireland.This MAY have been why the doctors did what they did.

I think give the baby the medication for a few weeks and see does it help.There is no point saying something is wrong but questioning the potential solutions.If you have an idea about what may be the problem then suggest it to the doctor, but if not, try the medicine.At least if it doesn't work you can go back to them and say it doesn't work and they will be able to look at other solutions.

killanena · 14-12-2018 10:36pm

When my daughter was born she was as continent and quite as could be.

Sleep all night apart from 1 feed around 3am. But every few weeks she had a few tough weeks where she suffered from reflux, growth spurts or teething. It was like a living nightmare for all 3 of us during those periods. We just had to battle through them and follow our gp's advice.

That went on for about a 18 months. Thankfully for us it wasn't constant just periods here and there but its heartbreaking to see then suffer in anyway, especially when you are exhausted so I feel your pain.

Stick to your gp's advice. They are especially careful with what they prescribe infants and I know sometimes it sounds like they are not listening to you but they have probably seen 100's if not 1000's of infants sense they started their career and know the telltale signs.

If all the test came back clear then there is nearly a 100% chance it isn't serious.

The first 18 months will be hard sometimes, being a parent is the hardest job in the world but they will also fly by.

Few tips with what helped us.

-Air purifier with eucalyptus oil when they are stuffy or have a wet cough. Don't leave this on constantly because it can be harsh. Maybe just an hour before bed.

-dehumidifier during the winter. You will be surprised how much water they gather from the air in just a week!

-when she starts teething, sugar free aniseed and glycerine dipped on her soother will work magic with getting her to sleep. Try to limit how often you use it as baby's love it and may look for it every night.

-folic acid in one of her bottles everyday if your not doing it already. Doctors or nurses usually say to do this for the first 6 months from birth.

I wish you the very best, they grow way too fast so enjoy every moment that you can

The Hound Gone Wild · 14-12-2018 11:48pm

The baby is 28 days old... The doctor probably went white & second guessed themselves. Used Google to reassure themselves of dose etc. Doctors are people and are not walking encyclopedias.

Also

Your baby is 28 days old this information is needed on a prescription so your Pharmacist went white too and would have double checked dose etc.

Source am pharmacist, double check every paediatric prescription I dispense in a formulary book.

(At a guess you were given Gaviscon infant sachets. These neutralize stomach acid and create a lining around the throat/stomach and are perfectly safe within the dose you were given by your Dr/pharmacist)

Gimme A Pound · 15-12-2018 12:02am

The poo smell being described as "sour" does point to excess stomach acid.

The sneezing - this has been the dampest weather in ages.

Perhaps it's lactose intolerance too. Have you asked the doctor about this?

margo321 · 15-12-2018 12:03am

i had psoriasis and the emollients would drive my skin mad. it took me ages to realise this. stupidly i would keep adding more. i figured out the ingredients dodmt agree with me. switched to almond oil and got huge relief. good luck. must be dreadful to see baby so upset.

i really don't know how i can help my little princess

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