Simple things you can't do/don't understand

Wibbs · 01-01-2016 11:35am

ancapailldorcha wrote: »

Finally, someone else who didn't like the new one...

The Force Awakens? Very well crafted franchise popularity by numbers, but empty drivel behind the craft*. Disney making sure it got return on its huge investment by ticking as many early 21st century tropes as possible while keeping the nostalgics on board. With added flash bangs. It worked though, as ticket receipts are showing.

*for all the awfulness of the prequels Lucas was at least attempting to weave a quite complex and new narrative, he just didn't have close to the skills to do it. Fantastic producer, had his moments as a concept creator(he was a large part of the concept of Indiana Jones), but he couldn't direct traffic in a Mongolian hill village.

Fox_In_Socks · 01-01-2016 1:14pm

Arbiter of Good Taste wrote: »

I grew up in America and still visit a lot. I have never seen seen anyone use the side of a fork to cut food unless it's something like cake.

I do this but I'm not a yank

lanos · 01-01-2016 1:56pm

Colser wrote: »

I cant reverse my car in a straight line unless I go really slowly and even then its a struggle,if someones watching Im even worse.:o

Sam Kade wrote: »

I can reverse any car at speed just using rear view and wing mirrors I can't understand why people have to open their drivers door and crane their neck back to reverse :rolleyes:

George Costanza

ancapailldorcha · 01-01-2016 2:13pm

Wibbs wrote: »

The Force Awakens? Very well crafted franchise popularity by numbers, but empty drivel behind the craft*. Disney making sure it got return on its huge investment by ticking as many early 21st century tropes as possible while keeping the nostalgics on board. With added flash bangs. It worked though, as ticket receipts are showing.

*for all the awfulness of the prequels Lucas was at least attempting to weave a quite complex and new narrative, he just didn't have close to the skills to do it. Fantastic producer, had his moments as a concept creator(he was a large part of the concept of Indiana Jones), but he couldn't direct traffic in a Mongolian hill village.

Disney are nothing if not savvy. They've basically hit the market sweet spot in that they've successfully targeted parents who grew up with the franchise and given them an incentive to introduce their children to it and encourage their interest in it which will then lead to increased merchandise sales. They've also went with a female protagonist for a similar reason.

Regarding the film itself, I thought it was a bland rehash of the original. Fine if that's how it was marketed but it was sold as the first chapter in a new story. Em... no. All the tropes are there and there in force. Worse, the critics seem to be lapping it up.

Queenalocin · 01-01-2016 2:31pm

I can't figure out how to see 'spoilers' on Boards.

Colser · 01-01-2016 2:46pm

Paypal and Parcel Motel...feel like Im the only one not using them. Also cant do an apostrophe on laptop.

Gwynplaine · 01-01-2016 2:46pm

I can't tell the difference between Chris Rock and Chris Tucker.
I can't understand how people find Mrs. Brown funny.

Ken. · 01-01-2016 3:47pm

Queenalocin wrote: »

I can't figure out how to see 'spoilers' on Boards.

Left click and drag your mouse across the spoilered area.

What are you looking at.

OneArt · 01-01-2016 3:54pm

tomthetank wrote: »

I can't eat food on public transport. I just can't do it. It's comparable to me to being naked In pilibluc or something, it's just so vulgar and rude and attention seeking. Why do people do it? There's a girl beside me now on the bus hamming into a pack of cheese and union crisps. it's smelly and loud and gross and the bus stinks cheesy and oniony now. Ugh

I can understand why people would be uncomfortable eating on public transport. But unless it has a pungent or overpowering smell, I don't see the issue with other people doing it.

I also don't see why you'd consider it attention-seeking. People need to eat. It's a basic need. Some can wait, others can't (such as those with hypoglycemia or diabetes). Furthermore, some of us are quite busy, need to eat but simply don't have the time to sit down except when they're on the bus or walking.

I saw a sign on a tram once stating that it wasn't a restaurant, so don't eat on it. Eh, no: I'm not on the tram for sh!ts and giggles, I'm doing it to get from A to B. I don't eat on it for fun either, I just need to eat because I'm a living organism that needs food, and often have no choice but to get the bloody tram! The same with drinking (non-alcoholic liquids that is!): unless you're spilling it everywhere or causing a massive disturbance/mess, it's not something to get worked up about.

This Fat Girl Runs · 01-01-2016 4:29pm

I can't roll my r's.

Earthhorse · 01-01-2016 7:39pm

I can read a clock but I really have to concentrate to do it. I don't know why, I'm pretty good with numbers normally but I just never took to it. It all seems counterintuitive; the short hand is for the hours (but hours are longer than minutes) and the minute hand is pointing at the hour (but the divisions of five tell you what minute you're at). Clocks can be lovely ornaments but if you ask me they are a bad design.

_Whimsical_ wrote: »

I cannot estimate length or distance at all. It's a complete mental block for me.

Me too! Or understand when others do:

"That's 50 yards up the road."

Is it? Is that far? Near? I have no idea. I often have to ask people for a frame of reference, like is something twice the length of this room or whatever.

Robsweezie wrote: »

I've come across these terms recently myself. My understanding is left wing is conservative, liking things as they are. Right wing is more liberal, louder and outspoken on topics like abortion, being pro choice.

Another person who can't tell their left from their right.

TheBiz · 01-01-2016 8:02pm

I don't understand the idea of headbutting someone. I imagine it would hurt!
It just seems to be done to intimidate people (whilst possibly getting a concussion)

Eugene Norman · 01-01-2016 8:26pm

TheBiz wrote: »

I don't understand the idea of headbutting someone. I imagine it would hurt!
It just seems to be done to intimidate people (whilst possibly getting a concussion)

Everybody is doing it wrong. Aim for the nose.

Eugene Norman · 01-01-2016 8:27pm

I don't get chopsticks. Not only how to use them ( I never learned) but why bother.

m5ex9oqjawdg2i · 02-01-2016 12:38am

longshanks wrote:

Computer programming. It seems easy enough, but deadly boring. If I gave it a whirl I'd probably something something something

Programming isn't a simple task.

Wibbs · 02-01-2016 12:56am

ancapailldorcha wrote: »

All the tropes are there and there in force.

I see what you did there.

dr.fuzzenstein · 02-01-2016 12:59am

Wibbs wrote: »

The Force Awakens? Very well crafted franchise popularity by numbers, but empty drivel behind the craft*. Disney making sure it got return on its huge investment by ticking as many early 21st century tropes as possible while keeping the nostalgics on board. With added flash bangs. It worked though, as ticket receipts are showing.

*for all the awfulness of the prequels Lucas was at least attempting to weave a quite complex and new narrative, he just didn't have close to the skills to do it. Fantastic producer, had his moments as a concept creator(he was a large part of the concept of Indiana Jones), but he couldn't direct traffic in a Mongolian hill village.

Don't be so quick to write it off, this was one movie of three, on it's own it won't make much sense. Episode 4 on its own made zero sense in '77.
As for the prequels? Midichlorians, Jar Jar, Vader shouting "Nooooooooo!", soppy love scenes, but your argument is that there is a story in there. So you have to give the new ones a chance. Episode 1 is utter, utter drivel on it's own, the pod race is pointless, I could go on for hours about how awful it is. Anakin built 3PO? Gimme a break!
Episode 7 is head and shoulders above the awfulness that was Ep1. And I'm willing to engage in gentlemanly fisticuffs with anyone who would suggest Ep1 is better than 7.

brokensoul84 · 02-01-2016 1:09am

Click my fingers due to a childhood injury.

Ride a bike.

Swim

ancapailldorcha · 02-01-2016 1:14am

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Don't be so quick to write it off, this was one movie of three, on it's own it won't make much sense. Episode 4 on its own made zero sense in '77.
As for the prequels? Midichlorians, Jar Jar, Vader shouting "Nooooooooo!", soppy love scenes, but your argument is that there is a story in there. So you have to give the new ones a chance. Episode 1 is utter, utter drivel on it's own, the pod race is pointless, I could go on for hours about how awful it is. Anakin built 3PO? Gimme a break!
Episode 7 is head and shoulders above the awfulness that was Ep1. And I'm willing to engage in gentlemanly fisticuffs with anyone who would suggest Ep1 is better than 7.

Nonsense. I had no trouble understanding 4 or 1. 7 is just a cheap re-packaging of 4. Nothing more.

Wibbs · 02-01-2016 1:15am

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

Episode 7 is head and shoulders above the awfulness that was Ep1.

Well it would be, Dr F, given it's a higher volume remix of the actual first film. Save for a protagonist who shows near zero growth on the "hero's journey", a cut price Hunger Games chick with light sabres.

on it's own it won't make much sense.

Oh it makes prefect sense. To the accountants in Disney. It's a button pressing exercise to get the greasy till ringing again and little more. And as I say it worked. Though he's a fantastic visual director, JJ Abrams couldn't have an original thought if he tried. He's like Coldplay to Spielberg's U2. A cheaper and easier listening ripoff. But that does make him a safe pair of hands.

Episode 4 on its own made zero sense in '77.

Riiiight. Then why did it spawn a near religion at the time and cause all that happened since? We're still talking about it today. Not bad for "zero sense". The original was a space opera with Flash Gordon, Samurai flics and Dune all mixed up, with some novel elements from Lucas and groundbreaking special effects. All of which gave people, mainly small boys a major hard on. The current film is only to happy to repeat(to a near farcical level) the "zero sense" of the original of the species. The original was beyond huge at the time. I had lived through Jaws and the craziness and rubber sharks et al, but Star Wars was on another level entirely. It hit us kids at the time like a steamroller. It was so out there and different, but oddly familiar.

dr.fuzzenstein · 02-01-2016 1:24am

It was Episode IV, a new hope. Says it right there on the scrolling text.

Because it picked the story up halfway through, a lot of stuff in it makes no sense without the subsequent films or the prequels. Of course it caused a riot in 77, it was utterly new, we can never get that back. This is episode 7 and there is 2 more. We'll have to see how 7,8 and 9 work as a whole. And if it makes you feel any better, Abrahams won't direct the next 2, so there is hope.

Eugene Norman · 02-01-2016 1:27am

There's a Star Wars thread.

02-01-2016 1:33am

Episode VIII: nobody cares

I'm on the "can't whistle" list. I can make a whistling sound in exactly one pitch

dr.fuzzenstein · 02-01-2016 1:46am

I can't keep on topic.

Irish Steve · 02-01-2016 3:14am

I don't understand how so many of the people I talk to are sick of the political system in this country, yet the same cronies keep on getting elected again.

_Whimsical_ · 02-01-2016 3:33am

I don't understand how when everyone's been heartbroken and all of us share very similar dreams and hopes, and when the same big life fears haunt all of us, how is it we don't relate a bit more to each others pain and be a bit more humane and mindful of other people's feelings?
What the hell is wrong with all of us?

starry_eyed · 02-01-2016 3:48am

_Whimsical_ wrote: »

I don't understand how when everyone's been heartbroken and all of us share very similar dreams and hopes, and when the same big life fears haunt all of us, how is it we don't relate a bit more to each others pain and be a bit more humane and mindful of other people's feelings?
What the hell is wrong with all of us?

People hide behind defensive walls and pretend that they don't feel this pain in order to independently avoid it happening again while in the meantime they miss out on human connections. This is why I enjoy meditation groups as people share wordlessly a connection with energy alone. Plus the world is full of 'I'm better than you' types.

Gerinspain · 02-01-2016 11:58am

I can't post links (not enough posts) but for the people who can't do duvet covers...Google burrito duvet and your life will be transformed!

I can't cook or make food taste good - luckily my OH has magic cooking skills.

I can't understand amps, ohms and other electrical terms.

Wibbs · 02-01-2016 12:02pm

Earthhorse wrote: »

I can read a clock but I really have to concentrate to do it. I don't know why, I'm pretty good with numbers normally but I just never took to it. It all seems counterintuitive; the short hand is for the hours (but hours are longer than minutes) and the minute hand is pointing at the hour (but the divisions of five tell you what minute you're at). Clocks can be lovely ornaments but if you ask me they are a bad design.

Mostly down to them being a design that evolved. The first clocks only had hour hands. If you look at the layout with only an hour hand it makes perfect sense. The hand replaced the shadow of a sundial. When they increased accuracy first the minute hand got added, then the seconds(the latter more to tell you your clock/watch was still running). It's all a bit cobbled together TBH.

dr.fuzzenstein wrote: »

I can't keep on topic.

Meh, it's called normal human conversation D. It naturally ebbs and flows around a topic, online forums sometimes short circuit that, though depends on the individual. It's a boon for the more aspie of us, who can often be thrown by real life(™) conversation, so makes for a more level playing field.

_Whimsical_ wrote: »

I don't understand how when everyone's been heartbroken and all of us share very similar dreams and hopes, and when the same big life fears haunt all of us, how is it we don't relate a bit more to each others pain and be a bit more humane and mindful of other people's feelings?
What the hell is wrong with all of us?

We're a mashup of social animal and individual. People are inherently self interested and self involved. It varies a lot depending on the individual, but it's always there to some degree. Modern communications, social media and the like should on the surface increase our empathy, but it seems to increase our narcissism, encourages it even. Hell it even encourages the narcissism of how enlightened we claim to be.

Peregrine · 02-01-2016 12:27pm

Gerinspain wrote: »

I can't understand amps, ohms and other electrical terms.

The amp is the unit of current, and the ohm is the unit of resistance, in a circuit.

Look up Ohm's law. There are some very simple tutorials on it.

dandyelevan · 02-01-2016 8:36pm

Can't post a picture on Boards to save my life!

That_Guy · 02-01-2016 9:57pm

I can't understand people who can't go to the gym without sharing it on social media sites. Likewise, uploading pictures of what they're about to eat.

BOHtox · 02-01-2016 10:00pm

I can't say 'penguin'

etoughguy · 02-01-2016 10:00pm

Social media, cant stand it

Medusa22 · 02-01-2016 10:25pm

BOHtox wrote: »

I can't say 'penguin'

Neither can Benedict Cumberbatch

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-GnLDJAgrws

starry_eyed · 02-01-2016 10:55pm

That_Guy wrote: »

I can't understand people who can't go to the gym without sharing it on social media sites. Likewise, uploading pictures of what they're about to eat.

People should start uploading pictures of food after it's been digested. That could catch on.

Jen Pigs Fly · 02-01-2016 11:26pm

I can not click my fingers.

I also can not real analogue time

I was very sick when they tonight it in school and never picked it up after I got out of hospital ....

To this day wrist watches are for decoration only, I can only read digital time.

Caoimhgh1n · 02-01-2016 11:34pm

xxxJennyxxx wrote: »

I can not click my fingers.

I also can not real analogue time I was very sick when they tonight it in school and never picked it up after I got out of hospital ....

To this day wrist watches are for decoration only, I can only read digital time.

Would you not try and learn? The small hand tells what hour it is, and the big hand tells the minute.

Jen Pigs Fly · 02-01-2016 11:59pm

Caoimhgh1n wrote: »

Would you not try and learn? The small hand tells what hour it is, and the big hand tells the minute.

I've tried and tried and tried

I love watches and love wearing them, it's such a waste really! It's the hands that get me ... Little hand is hours but hours is bigger than minutes but minutes have a bigger hand!

I also don't understand pie charts or graphs due to the same illness.

I think I missed most of 2nd and 3rd class ... Goes to show how much our children needs school!

_Whimsical_ · 03-01-2016 3:37pm

xxxJennyxxx wrote: »

I've tried and tried and tried I love watches and love wearing them, it's such a waste really! It's the hands that get me ... Little hand is hours but hours is bigger than minutes but minutes have a bigger hand!

!

I remember being taught in school that the hours hand was small because it goes much slower than the minutes hand. That might help you remember.
It doesn't matter though, no one will judge you so don't stress over it.We all have our war wounds, scars left after hard experiences, this is just one of yours.

retalivity · 03-01-2016 6:27pm

I don't understand people who pay exorbitant amounts to go to concerts.
At home over xmas, a couple of younger cousins are going to Justin Bieber but didnt get tickets on general sale, paid €250 each out of their own pocket and bought off a tout.
Even the regular cost of tickets - I wouldn't mind going to see the Stone Roses next year, but not at €80 a pop (never mind all the other associated costs). It's too much to effectively stand in a field all day listening to a band who were great 25 years ago and could well be awful this time round. See also Fleetwood Mac, U2, Van Morrison (although as much as i love van i'd never pay for him now as he is atrocious live)

etoughguy · 03-01-2016 7:21pm

retalivity wrote: »

I don't understand people who pay exorbitant amounts to go to concerts.
At home over xmas, a couple of younger cousins are going to Justin Bieber but didnt get tickets on general sale, paid €250 each out of their own pocket and bought off a tout.
Even the regular cost of tickets - I wouldn't mind going to see the Stone Roses next year, but not at €80 a pop (never mind all the other associated costs). It's too much to effectively stand in a field all day listening to a band who were great 25 years ago and could well be awful this time round. See also Fleetwood Mac, U2, Van Morrison (although as much as i love van i'd never pay for him now as he is atrocious live)

Great point totally agree with this

Ilyana 2.0 · 03-01-2016 7:21pm

I can't numbers.

I can never remember the rules to card games.

I can't wrap presents nicely.

newbee22 · 03-01-2016 8:24pm

I can't swim.

dr.fuzzenstein · 03-01-2016 8:28pm

Ilyana 2.0 wrote: »

I can't numbers.

I can never remember the rules to card games.

I can't wrap presents nicely.

As someone with a similar affliction I can tell you poker is OK, since it's mostly messing with your opponent and the actual rules of it are very easy, so try that.
I'm from Germany and we have a bazillion card games. Skat and Schafskopf will forever be completely closed books to me.
And for the love of god be careful when googeling skat, because the other meaning of it is not for the faint-hearted.

BOHtox · 03-01-2016 8:30pm

Medusa22 wrote: »

Neither can Benedict Cumberbatch

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-GnLDJAgrws

hahaha that's gas. Heard that before actually but completely forgot about it. There's no need for me to say 'penguins' too often anyway. I'm more of a 'pengweng' man myself

thelad95 · 03-01-2016 8:33pm

I can't reverse into a parking space, and if at all possible, I will never park between two cars. As you can imagine Christmas shopping was a nightmare for me!

Simple things you can't do/don't understand

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