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Theft of Items from our Baby’s Grave

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    #92
    wiggle16
    Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 3,022 Mod ✭✭✭✭wiggle16


    cullieh wrote: »
    Cheers man. I think I will say to the caretakers what is happening maybe the church has cameras although I walked around the building many times and never saw any.

    By the sounds of it the guilty win then eh!

    Notwithstanding finding a solution, I think that you will need to keep in mind that whatever you do, there is always the chance that some c*nt will go and undo it anyway.

    Every single time I have been in Glasnevin Cemetery i have seen broken headstones and graves that have had the gravel kicked all over the place. It's horrific but it's just a fact of life. There are d*ckheads out there that for some reason think it's funny.

    That shouldn't stop you tending your baby's grave or putting toys down for them, I'm not saying that at all. But I do think it's something you kind of have to accept as a fact of the matter, that there is a risk there that you need to learn to live with, and you need to find a way to make peace with those feelings, when you go to the grave and it's not how you last left it.


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    #93
    Strumms
    Registered Users Posts: 24,807 ✭✭✭✭Strumms


    The OP didn’t say what cemetery this was but my parents went to visit my sisters grave yesterday and a rather heavy religious statue that had been there for 40 plus years was stolen from her grave. This was in Deansgrange. I wonder if it’s the same cemetery as the OP might have been referring to...


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    #94
    MetLuver
    Registered Users Posts: 213 ✭✭MetLuver


    cullieh wrote: »
    Hi People. In the last couple of months items ( toys that her cousins gave her) have been going missing from my baby’s resting place. On the first occasion 3 action hero figures went missing, These were replace with 5 new figures all similar to what were taken. These 5 figures have now been removed. My wife and I are dismayed as to how anybody could do this, let alone to Baby. — I guess my reason for posting here is.. Can anyone recommend a camera or anything at all that I could get to film what is going on. I would need something with a long life as unfortunately we cannot be there all the time to see who is doing this.

    Many thanks In Advance,

    A Distraught Parent.

    So very sorry to hear of your loss. There is Nothing god damn 'tacky' about leaving toys on a child's grave, it's astounding how that was even mentioned here, some people seem to be clueless to the feelings of others. I hope you are all ok and sort something out to stop this happening. XXXxx


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    #95
    ytpe2r5bxkn0c1
    Closed Accounts Posts: 32,688 ✭✭✭✭ytpe2r5bxkn0c1


    kowloon wrote: »
    Has Wenstrup mentioned being a reservist every time he gets to talk? 'I've been in war and I've studied war'.

    Pardon?


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    #96
    kowloon
    Registered Users Posts: 13,281 ✭✭✭✭kowloon


    Abdiel Hissing Safari wrote: »
    Pardon?

    Oops, had more than one tab open, posted in the wrong thread.


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    #97
    ChikiChiki
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,950 ✭✭✭ChikiChiki


    One eyed Jack wrote: »
    I understand your frustration OP, but I think the better course of action would be to report the incident to the Gardaí and allow them to investigate, rather than the idea of setting up a camera.

    You must be joking...

    You've a lot more confidence in them than I do.


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    #98
    skallywag
    Registered Users Posts: 2,987 ✭✭✭skallywag


    boardlady wrote: »
    ...She finds that foxes take a lot of her stuff if she leaves it out. ...

    This was the first thing that occurred to me.

    I have a lot of experience of cats especially taking very specific looking toys.


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    #99
    Witcher
    Registered Users Posts: 14,452 ✭✭✭✭Witcher


    ChikiChiki wrote: »
    You must be joking...

    You've a lot more confidence in them than I do.

    Nobody asked how much confidence you have in the Gardai, One Eyed Jack was addressing the OP. It's not your thread to be soapboxing.


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    #100
    ILoveYourVibes
    Registered Users Posts: 15,176 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    I am sorry for your loss. Its so horrible.

    A friend of mine lost her daughter and during the wake someone stole things from her daughters room. My friend got them back though.


    Report it to the guards.

    If you want to film it then do so ....then expose the bastards.


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    #101
    Jonybgud
    Registered Users Posts: 463 ✭✭Jonybgud


    OP, so sorry you are troubled by this, a camera isn't the way. Unfortunately I have a little experience in this area.

    In my case the small items were being taken by wild animals/crows as one person saw a crow take a marble from a set on one occasion. I actually felt so much better knowing this. I took a bit of time out and made a small display case in the shape of a squat lantern with enough room to take the little trinkets and keep them safe. They're still there some years later and have even been added to.

    I hope you are looking after yourself OP, genuinely.


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    #102
    Obvious Desperate Breakfasts
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,474 ✭✭✭Obvious Desperate Breakfasts


    Raconteuse wrote: »
    What little kids would be in a graveyard though? Other than those accompanied by an adult.

    Visiting family graves with their parents. I was in graveyards plenty as a child. And kids from houses nearby might wander through them a bit.


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    #103
    Obvious Desperate Breakfasts
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,474 ✭✭✭Obvious Desperate Breakfasts


    Up Donegal wrote: »
    One would hope that if an adults who are in a graveyard with their children would tell the children to return anything they lifted back to where they got it.
    spurious wrote: »
    That would involve parenting, a skill absent in many people who have children.

    If a small child picks up something from a grave and walks away from it, not even far, there’s a good chance they won’t remember which grave they took it from. The toys could be discarded elsewhere in the graveyard. It’s very easy for children to wander in graveyards.


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    #104
    branie2
    Registered Users Posts: 10,292 ✭✭✭✭branie2


    Despicable! :mad:


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    #105
    rainbowtrout
    Registered Users Posts: 15,381 ✭✭✭✭rainbowtrout


    A lot of people seem to think that it's children stealing from the grave. Adults have been stealing flowers, lamps, ornaments, potted plants from graves since the dawn of time. An adult who would steal an item such as those wouldn't have any problem taking a child's toy to bring home with them.

    I think you are fighting a losing battle OP. Stealing items from graves is a very common occurrence. As much as you want to leave toys at the grave, it might be easier not to.

    I don't think setting up a camera is the answer either, anything that can film longterm and be hidden is going to cost money. If by some miracle the hours of film happen to catch someone stealing from the grave, how are you going to identify them?


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    #106
    antix80
    Registered Users Posts: 2,419 ✭✭✭antix80


    rainbowtrout wrote: »
    A lot of people seem to think that it's children stealing from the grave. Adults have been stealing flowers, lamps, ornaments, potted plants from graves since the dawn of time. An adult who would steal an item such as those wouldn't have any problem taking a child's toy to bring home with them.

    I think you are fighting a losing battle OP. Stealing items from graves is a very common occurrence. As much as you want to leave toys at the grave, it might be easier not to.

    I don't think setting up a camera is the answer either, anything that can film longterm and be hidden is going to cost money. If by some miracle the hours of film happen to catch someone stealing from the grave, how are you going to identify them?

    Chances are they'll have a pale skinny face, crooked nose, and a jacket with a hood up.
    Despite the poor image the guards will know who they are but do anything about it. They're not going to get a search warrant and Cctv evidence alone doesn't hold up in court without an eye witness.


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    #107
    Dr. Colossus
    Closed Accounts Posts: 98 ✭✭Dr. Colossus


    My sincere condolences for your loss.
    Could you contact a newspaper or radio station and tell them what has happened?

    It might shame the thieves to stop.


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    #108
    antix80
    Registered Users Posts: 2,419 ✭✭✭antix80


    Dr. Colossus wrote: »
    Could you contact a newspaper or radio station and tell them what has happened?

    Op, don't do this. They're called sad face stories because the rags want a sad face photo to go with the article. Daily mail run stories like this the whole time.

    No need for your name or child's name to be sensationalised like this.


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    #109
    ILoveYourVibes
    Registered Users Posts: 15,176 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    antix80 wrote: »
    Op, don't do this. They're called sad face stories because the rags want a sad face photo to go with the article. Daily mail run stories like this the whole time.

    No need for your name or child's name to be sensationalised like this.


    The op can make the right decision about this for their family. Whether they decide to go for privacy or to share it is their decision.


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    #110
    Obvious Desperate Breakfasts
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,474 ✭✭✭Obvious Desperate Breakfasts


    rainbowtrout wrote: »
    A lot of people seem to think that it's children stealing from the grave. Adults have been stealing flowers, lamps, ornaments, potted plants from graves since the dawn of time. An adult who would steal an item such as those wouldn't have any problem taking a child's toy to bring home with them.

    I think you are fighting a losing battle OP. Stealing items from graves is a very common occurrence. As much as you want to leave toys at the grave, it might be easier not to.

    I don't think setting up a camera is the answer either, anything that can film longterm and be hidden is going to cost money. If by some miracle the hours of film happen to catch someone stealing from the grave, how are you going to identify them?

    Nobody thinks that for sure. It’s just a fairly likely scenario.


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    #111
    ILoveYourVibes
    Registered Users Posts: 15,176 ✭✭✭✭ILoveYourVibes


    Op who does the upkeep of the cemetery fall to?

    All childrens graves usually have toys or windspinners etc are there other families who have noticed the same thing?

    You could make a complaint to those responsible for the cemetery upkeep.


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    #112
    Shady Grady
    Closed Accounts Posts: 234 ✭✭Shady Grady


    Very sorry for your loss as others have said before. My suggestion is could you set up a place to honor her at home? To me that's where the memories of life and love are. And you can still keep her memory and joys safe if that makes sense. I truly don't mean to cause you more pain by saying this, but she lives in your hearts and in the home you provided her, not in a patch of field with a marker.

    Again I am truly sorry for your loss and the addition pain caused by scums. I can only pray the good Lord helps ease your pain.


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    #113
    368100
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,067 ✭✭✭368100


    That really is the lowest of the low whoever is the culprit. Sorry for your loss


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