Does anyone drink?

etymon · 29-11-2015 6:14pm #1

Errr... do any of you drink?
Clearly, I don't mean the usual consumption or behaviour as before being pregnant, but a glass of wine if you go out for a meal? Would you find people stare or pass comments?
I'm more interested in society's view as opposed to the medical evidence (I'm a doctor so am aware of the evidence linking certain drinking patterns to foetal abnormalities and behavioural difficulties later in life).
Also, I heard a pregnant woman in the coffee queue saying how she was fed up with decaff.... no caffeine AT ALL? Again, wouldn't bother me too much giving it up but is that what is being recommended by the antenatal clinics?

Cakerbaker · 29-11-2015 6:33pm

I haven't drank but that's more cos I just haven't fancied it rather than being totally against the idea of having a glass of wine with a nice meal. I don't drink coffee but my tea consumption has stayed the same so around 4 mugs a day. I was at an early pregnancy talk in Holles St where they said to limit your caffeine intake to 1 strong cup of brewed coffee from a coffee shop or 2/3 cups of instant coffee or 3/4 cups of tea (I think I remember those amounts correctly) but they didn't say to cut it out completely.

LegacyUser · 29-11-2015 8:09pm

I drank sporadically before i got pregnant, while pregnant not at all, not once, i'm not so addicted that i need it though,

caffeine wise my only source of it was through red bull, which i haven't touched since before we even conceived! while i do crave it badly at times (i am/was addicted to it) i am avoiding it completely,

i'm finding it harder to be honest to give up the foods i loved, like this no "cold meats" things is gonna kill me around Christmas, i LOVE eating ham sandwiches and leftovers for the whole week after Christmas!

i was so mad at my husband for banning me from eating a jambon during last week... (apparently deli food is bad???)

there seems to be so many do's and don't's, i find the easiest ones to avoid are ones like alcohol....

rainbow kirby · 29-11-2015 8:49pm

Regarding caffeine - the NHS recommends a total of 200mg of caffeine a day, which is around 3 cups of tea or 2 instant coffees so I try and stick to that. It's a bit of a pain because I was a real caffeine fiend!

Haven't had any alcohol at all though. I'd rather not take any chances there. I was a craft beer nerd before, but it won't kill me to stop for 9 months to give my little one the best possible start.

angeldelight · 29-11-2015 9:12pm

I was the same as RK - I stuck to the 200mg caffeine guidelines but had no issue not drinking alcohol at all. I probably would judge someone drinking while pregnant, it just seems quite selfish to me. Same with people who smoke while pregnant

detoxkid · 29-11-2015 9:29pm

I don't drink at all when pregnant but wouldn't judge someone for having a glass of wine. Smoking would be a totally different story - I would completely judge them for it

I was never a big coffee drinker but I've had the odd latte and plenty of tea

Day Lewin · 29-11-2015 9:40pm

I think it is too easy to get judgmental. The results of research are from trends observed across large numbers, not individuals. And even they are only as good as the latest published results - that is, deductions from results. And they change too, all the time.

Only recently it was again deemed to be OK for a breastfeeding mother to take a drink - where for years it had been "warned off".

As far as I know, the recommendations about alcohol are precautionary: there certainly IS a thing called Foetal Alcohol Syndrome, but I believe it is associated with very large intakes of booze - binge drinkers, or actual alcoholics: not moderate Mrs Bourgeois with one glass of red once a week.
So "just to be sure" they issue a blanket ban and next thing you know, those mummies are staring, sneering and judging at some poor lady having a glass of beer with her husband.

Lighten up, folks: there are guys doing PhD's whose mothers smoked while they were pregnant.
I don't actually recommend this, but it's worth reminding ourselves that individual outcomes are not dictated by statistics.

lazygal · 29-11-2015 9:45pm

I drank while pregnant. I know I'll have been judged for it but I'm a healthy eater, took the supplements, exercised regularly and overall weighed up the risks. I had a glass of wine or similar every couple of weeks or so. Often I didn't finish it, it was just nice to know I was able to have one if I wanted.

I also drank and still do drink while breastfeeding. I'd have been without a drink for coming on four years if I'd been totally abstinent because of pregnancy and breastfeeding. I think I'm doing my best and I'm comfortable with my choices.

Edit. The guidelines on drinking while pregnant and drinking while breastfeeding changed during both my pregnancies and while I've been feeding my children. I had normal coffee and tea most days too.

pwurple · 29-11-2015 9:46pm

I don't drink tea or coffee normally, so yeah, no caffeine during pregnancies for me. Decaf, I know a few people who also steered clear of that also. They told me there were worse chemicals in the decaf than in regular coffee from stripping out the caffeine. I never checked that out, as I don't drink it anyway. Don't smoke either.

Didn't drink booze for the first trimester, stomach was turned by it.

Had maybe a third of a glass of wine once a month or so with dinner after that. Topped it up with water. So a total of 2 glasses of wine over the entire pregnancy, spread out.

I do remember being out with my pregnant sister in law, who had cranberry juice in a wine glass... Some busy body came over and started reading her the riot act about it.

MistyCheese · 29-11-2015 9:55pm

No I haven't had any alcohol at all since discovering I was pregnant. I don't smoke anyway so I can't say anything about that. I don't judge others who do, it's not my business. It's something I wouldn't do but all that means is I don't do it. I don't concern myself with what others do.

Sure I was at a wedding a few years back and a heavily pregnant woman was snorting cocaine. Not something I agree with, I've switched to decaff coffee and decaff tea, but that was her choice.

Perversely though I do have a problem buying cigarettes or alcohol when visibly pregnant. I will almost certainly be buying alcohol for a friend or two closer to Christmas (I'll be 6 months pregnant by then) and I probably will feel like stipulating "They're not for me!" Silly, I know.

Digs · 29-11-2015 9:56pm

Coffee addict here, morning sickness now means it turns my stomach so haven't gone near it in the first trimester, certainly wouldn't deny myself it if I fancied one.

Alcohol wise, again I haven't had any yet, purely as my stomach isn't up to it and I have no interest. Fully intend having a glass at Christmas dinner should I feel like it, I probably only had one or two glasses of wine (which I didn't finish) throughout my first pregnancy for the same reasons.

People judging me wouldn't concern me at all, don't people have little to be worrying about if a grown woman enjoying a glass or two of wine in nine months upsets them.

January · 29-11-2015 10:07pm

expecting2016 wrote: »

I drank sporadically before i got pregnant, while pregnant not at all, not once, i'm not so addicted that i need it though,

caffeine wise my only source of it was through red bull, which i haven't touched since before we even conceived! while i do crave it badly at times (i am/was addicted to it) i am avoiding it completely,

i'm finding it harder to be honest to give up the foods i loved, like this no "cold meats" things is gonna kill me around Christmas, i LOVE eating ham sandwiches and leftovers for the whole week after Christmas!

i was so mad at my husband for banning me from eating a jambon during last week... (apparently deli food is bad???)

there seems to be so many do's and don't's, i find the easiest ones to avoid are ones like alcohol....

Eat your cold meats... eat your jambons... seriously life is too short.

lazygal · 29-11-2015 10:10pm

A lot of the food guidelines are a bit more related to how the food is prepared than a blanket no no. When able, I had smoked salmon, runny eggs, cheeses, cold cuts etc, once they were from a reliable source. You can't avoid everything.

olaola · 29-11-2015 10:44pm

This pregnancy I'm gagging for a drink. If I see a cold beer, I just want to glug it down! Last one, all alcohol tasted a bit strange to me, and I really didn't have any want for it. I would kill for a cool tall glass of Prosecco, with condensation on the outside. OH YEA!

The recommendation has changed since the last baba, and that's in less than 2 years! Now it seems to err on the side of caution and say NO alcohol. TBH, over Christmas I might have half a glass of fizz or wine. That would be about the extent of it.

Coffee, I can't do without. My gastrointestinal transit time has slowed somewhat *ahem* and I need that morning cup of joe to get things... moving. (sorry, TMI!) I have one Nespresso in the morning, and maybe a cup of tea in the evening. Have bought in loads of herbal teas, if I want something else hot during the day. So I'm well within the 200mg of caffeine limit.

Toots · 29-11-2015 10:58pm

I didn't touch alcohol during my pregnancy, or while attempting to breastfeed, but I wasn't a big drinker so I could really take it or leave it. Could probably count on one hand the amount of alcoholic drinks I've had since he was born 4 years ago!

I found the reduced caffeine really tough cos I was addicted to diet coke, but I switched to flavoured water and just had one can of diet coke a day to keep the cravings at bay! Also nearly lost my mind at no soft cheeses and no mayo! I mentioned it to my GP and he said once it was soft cheese from a known source and it was definitely pasteurised then it was grand. I was told to avoid deli coleslaw and mayo products mainly cos they'd been sitting out all day, I never knew anything about meat!

I don't know if I'd judge someone if I saw them drinking when they were pregnant, it depends on the circumstances. The odd small glass of wine would probably be OK imo. I remember being at my debs and one of the girls was pregnant and she was up doing shots at the bar half the night, absolutely locked.

moving_home · 29-11-2015 11:00pm

expecting2016 wrote: »

i'm finding it harder to be honest to give up the foods i loved, like this no "cold meats" things is gonna kill me around Christmas, i LOVE eating ham sandwiches and leftovers for the whole week after Christmas!

i was so mad at my husband for banning me from eating a jambon during last week... (apparently deli food is bad???)

there seems to be so many do's and don't's, i find the easiest ones to avoid are ones like alcohol....

Ehhhh what??? No cold meat? I think you are overdoing it. Be careful where you are getting your information as different countries have different guidelines due to different healthy and safety rules. The cold meat thing sounds American.

I followed the NHS guidelines and used my common sense. I didn't drink while pregnant and avoided blue cheese but pretty much ate everything else.

olaola · 29-11-2015 11:03pm

moving_home wrote: »

I followed the NHS guidelines and used my common sense. I didn't drink while pregnant and avoided blue cheese but pretty much ate everything else.

Yep, this is my bible - NHS site is great. Also, if you're gagging for that blue/soft cheese hit, you can eat it if it's been cooked. NOMZ! But the NHS (bless them) say that you can eat hard blue cheeses like Stilton. I shall be picking some up for Christmas...

Thumpette · 29-11-2015 11:11pm

Different perspective here, but a perspective all the same. My baby was stillborn almost a year ago at 41+4. I didn't drink anything or eat anything they don't recommend (or smoke or anything that's deemed dangerous).

On advice that will haunt me for the rest of my life I had one glass of wine the day before my son died. I've been told it had nothing to do with it (it was an undiagnosed placental issue) however I will always wonder if that one glass of wine might have made the difference that meant the placenta couldn't hold out that one extra day he needed. When I am pregnant again I will never ever touch anything that is even vaguely a risk. It's so not worth the risk.

For most people a glass of wine here and there won't do any harm, but the truth is there could be an underlying issue where it could make a real difference.

Best of luck for happy and healthy pregnancies girls X

nikpmup · 30-11-2015 1:10am

Thumpette wrote: »

Different perspective here, but a perspective all the same. My baby was stillborn almost a year ago at 41+4. I didn't drink anything or eat anything they don't recommend (or smoke or anything that's deemed dangerous).

On advice that will haunt me for the rest of my life I had one glass of wine the day before my son died. I've been told it had nothing to do with it (it was an undiagnosed placental issue) however I will always wonder if that one glass of wine might have made the difference that meant the placenta couldn't hold out that one extra day he needed. When I am pregnant again I will never ever touch anything that is even vaguely a risk. It's so not worth the risk.

For most people a glass of wine here and there won't do any harm, but the truth is there could be an underlying issue where it could make a real difference.

Best of luck for happy and healthy pregnancies girls X

^^^This. When I was pregnant, I didn't drink booze or caffeine, and didn't eat anything I was told not to. Not because I'm preachy or holier-than-thou, but because I felt, why risk anything for a bit of food or drink? It's only a few months, and its no hardship, really.
Thumpette, I'm sorry about your wee boy xxx

LegacyUser · 30-11-2015 1:13am

moving_home wrote: »

Ehhhh what??? No cold meat? I think you are overdoing it. Be careful where you are getting your information as different countries have different guidelines due to different healthy and safety rules. The cold meat thing sounds American.

It came from the midwives in the Cumh something to do with listeria I think?!?

As for the jambon I know he was right as it was what we were told when quizzed about foods I eat by the midwife (but tell that to my cravings) in that I could make them at home myself if I wanted, and at least know they were made/cooked properly!

Pregnant women have been known to eat coal after all,

But after a miscarriage we do want to do it right, and give baby the best chance and that means following all the rules for me anyways!

Novella · 30-11-2015 2:19am

I didn't have a drink while I was pregnant but I very rarely drink anyway so it didn't bother me. I have had one cocktail with dinner one night since my baby was born ten weeks ago and I fed her right before, plus had milk expressed for her next feed. Maybe that's OTT because I know a lot of people say you can have a drink or two and breastfeed but I dunno, I don't.

ShaShaBear · 30-11-2015 12:05pm

Never touched so much as a drop of drink with my daughter, and had one mouthful of beer from a bottle 6 days before I tested positive this time (40 weeks now and it still troubles me). I never smoked, so no issue there. I cut down caffeine incredibly by switching to caffeine free soft drinks, cutting out the small amount of coffee I might have and only using my partner's used teabag. I dont cut it out completely as it makes me INCREDIBLY ill with vomiting and migraines.
With my first daughter, I did follow the better part of the eating guidelines. Only had packaged cold meats, not from the deli counter. I did only eat well-done steaks and only packaged eggs, but had them runny if I wanted. Theres an unbelievable extreme to what they tell you to avoid, coming from a science background!

Diamond Doll · 30-11-2015 1:29pm

I stopped drinking from when I found out I was pregnant (at around 4 weeks.) I did have one West Coast Cooler when out for dinner at maybe around 6-7 months pregnant, but I'd done plenty of research into it and was confident that it wouldn't do any harm. I remember there was a news story a few months back about a waiter refusing to serve a drink to a pregnant woman ... the irony is that by the time a woman is visibly pregnant (i.e. 2nd/3rd trimester) the real risk for Fetal Alcohol Synrome is passed - the most dangerous time to drink is in the first trimester (although my understanding is that no alcohol passes to the foetus until the placenta is formed, around the 5th/6th week.) I wouldn't judge any woman for having a couple of drinks a week in pregnancy, although I completely understand why most women don't take the risk. Obviously heavy drinking during pregnancy is another issue altogether.

As for the other things you're meant to avoid ... I don't drink tea or coffee, but would have drank lots of Diet Coke before pregnancy. I didn't purposely cut down, but I completely went off the taste of it so didn't drink as much of it. I'm not a smoker, but it often crossed my mind that working in Dublin city centre I might as well have been, constantly breathing in other peoples' smoke and traffic fumes! I regularly ate deli meats, and also occasionally other crappy foods (fast food, cinema hot dogs, etc.) I had the odd runny egg. I definitely didn't do everything by the book, but I read up plenty on what was recommended and the rationale behind it, and made educated choices based on that.

The one thing that did weigh on my mind a lot was that around maybe 28 weeks pregnant, I had a chest infection and was coughing up blood, and I was sent to A&E for an chest Xray and PET scan, as the GP suspected a blood clot on my lung. Not recommended in pregnancy, as it can potentially harm the unborn baby, however obviously both my life and the baby's may have been in danger if it had been a clot (it wasn't.) I worried a lot about it afterwards, however no harm done, my baby was fine, thankfully.

eviltwin · 30-11-2015 1:34pm

Drank tea and coffee as normal. Had the odd light beer with number two. I'd reached four months before I knew I was pregnant with number one and I'd been drinking and smoking a lot but everything was fine. I personally think the risks are over exaggerated and once you are sensible you don't need to cut out everything.

30-11-2015 1:46pm

My friend is currently carrying a child that will not survive outside the womb. This country's appalling rules on the treatment of women during pregnancy mean that she has to carry her poor little baby to full term.

If you're ever considering giving someone the riot act, like another poster's sister in law was given, consider than you've no idea what's really going on in someone's life.

I would have a glass of wine during pregnancy if I felt like a glass of wine, absolutely no bother. I see no harm in it, and I wouldn't think twice if I saw another woman do the same.

Lux23 · 30-11-2015 1:51pm

I don't think there is any harm in one glass of wine or a beer. I would be more concerned about smoking although I can imagine it probably is very difficult to just stop.

Lucuma · 30-11-2015 2:21pm

I don't drink at all during the 1st trimester, not a sip. But after that I'd have the odd drink here and there if I was out for a meal or at friends house for dinner etc.

Caffeine wise I was really good on first pregnancy, only drank decaf coffee & 1 cup of normal tea per day (the rest Rooibos) for most of the pregnancy, I might have relaxed this a little in the last 6 weeks.

This time around I'm being very bold. Not even keeping to the 200mg guidelines some days. On Sat I had 2 cups of coffee from a restaurant within a couple of hours of each other and I felt jittery and could feel my heart in my chest all day and had to go to bed. I saw a poster write there they were told only 1 cup of strong brewed coffee from a cafe per day, ooops! Won't be doing that again.

Last time I followed all the food rules as well, this time I'm following some and not others. I am having runny eggs and I've had smoked salmon twice I think. I'm avoiding blue and soft cheeses and am insisting on steak and other meat well done. I wouldn't touch pate or liver.
On the guidelines I was given it didn't say anything about cold sliced meats like ham. I've eaten rolls from delis and didn't even think about that aspect to be honest (that they are sitting around)...I wouldn't go for a salad bar though.

My Aunty told me that my mother and all of my aunties drank, as normal (which for them is a quite a lot) the whole way through pregnancy same in 1st, 2nd and 3rd trimester. A good few of them also smoked. That really put things in perspective to be honest! All of my cousins are fit, healthy, intelligent with masters and PhDs to beat the band......

lazygal · 30-11-2015 2:51pm

Lux23 wrote: »

I don't think there is any harm in one glass of wine or a beer. I would be more concerned about smoking although I can imagine it probably is very difficult to just stop.

When I had my 20 week scan the doctor doing the scan said she can tell instantly that someone is a smoker based on the cord alone. She looked at mine and could tell me I was healthy and exercised quite a bit. I was amazed that she'd be able to tell that without even looking at the foetus. She also said when she tells women she can tell they smoke based on the cord bloodflow and condition the explanations are equal parts shocking and funny. Lots of 'I've only had one a week' or 'It's himself that smokes' or 'My GP said it would be bad for me to quit'.

My mum smoked while she was pregnant with me. Not a bother on me.

LegacyUser · 30-11-2015 6:11pm

Not a smoker, so not an issue.I didn't drink in the first pregnancy and haven't (and won't )inthis one.I'm not a big drinker so it's not a big deal, and my reason is more to do with the fact that it turns my stomach to think about it!Personally I don't see anything wrong with the odd half glass of wine though.
Coffee...less good.I didn't touch it during no.1, again mainly because although I wanted it badly, it made me so unwell in the first trimester, I'd end up going off by about week 7, and not being able to stomach it again!!This time I manage a small latte about 1-2 a week, but only since about week 15 and I usually regret it afterwards!But...I have a toddler and I'm working full time and some mornings it's just very tough to get going!!I would only have one cup of coffee a day normally anyway (either instant or shop bought).I havent eased back too much on tea, but I don't think i drink huge amounts of that relatively speaking.
The problem with this country is our extreme relationship with alcohol....it's almost necessary to say no alcohol at all, rather than 'some' alcohol, because we have such a problem with binge drinking.

Ciarrai76 · 30-11-2015 9:26pm

I am not drinking while pregnant, and I won't miss it as I wasn't a big drinker before I got pregnant. I didn't go out much anymore anyway, the last time I had a night out was the end of June, so probably the last time I was even a bit tipsy!
I barely even drink tea at the moment, that and water make me feel ill...so alcohol is way down the bottom of even wanting it!

cyning · 30-11-2015 11:47pm

I didn't and wouldn't drink when pregnant: Id be just too afraid of the what ifs how ever irrational they might be. And I don't think a glass of wine here or there would hurt but I still couldn't.

Won't touch smoked salmon or unpasteurised cheeses.

Caffeine in moderation (in diet coke don't drink tea or coffee), pre packaged sliced meats yes: sliced ham from my local shop no because I don't know how well they clean the machine. Same reason I avoid ice cream cones too. In saying that I pretty much puked from the second my first was conceived until she was born so I didn't need any more hospital stays for dehydration if I ate something dodgy

highly1111 · 30-11-2015 11:57pm

I never drank in the first trimesters as that's the real development stage. After that I would have a glass of wine once a week on a Friday /Saturday. My uncle is a GP who made the point that Irish people in general just cannot do things in moderation so therefore they just advocate a blanket ban - but there is no link between MODERATE alcohol intake & fetal abnormalities. At Christmas one year I was drinking (my first pregnancy) non alcoholic wine and the same uncle was almost (!) mocking me saying - the crap they've put into that to take the alcohol out of that is unreal - he told me to have a glass of wine and just enjoy it. So I did.

Smiley11 · 01-12-2015 12:54am

I have an occasional glass of wine & I really enjoy every drop. I sip it slowly & generally have a glass of water with it so that the wine will last longer basically. It now takes me about 3 hours to drink a small glass & I do this because I enjoy it so much. I'm not drinking to get drunk or harm my baby in any way, I'm just relaxing & continuing normal life at a far lower volume! I've tried non alcoholic beer & wine & find them awful so theres no point in drinking them for me. I don't enjoy them.

I think an occasional drink is fine but would be horrified to see someone smoking in pregnancy. I was a smoker myself until I found out I was pregnant & truly hope that I never fall back into that awful habit.

I have tea or coffee once or twice a week in a social situation & I enjoy that too. I think a pregnant woman can make her own decisions & once any of these "vices" aren't abused, then theres no reason to abstain unless you absolutely know you're going to cause harm.

Its a personal choice & people who judge should keep their opinions to themselves. My intelligent & highly articulate friend was chastised in public once for having a non alcoholic beer & to say her critic walked away embarrassed is an understatement. She made a complete fool of herself by jumping the gun & being presumptuous. We're all entitled to an opinion however I would never inflict mine on a stranger. Everybody here can & does make the right decision for themselves as far as I'm concerned.

mirrorwall14 · 01-12-2015 1:05am

Drank coffee (never a more than one coffee girl anyways) and Coke was the one of the only thing ms that settled my stomach in first trimester but I did keep an eye on totals. I think I may have had one glass of wine in third trimester? Can't remember to be honest. I craved pate and really really really missed it. Ate soft cheeses just checked they were pasteurised.

I had a fair few drugs tho, I was more concerned about them tbh! Started with just Zantac then built to Lanzol, had antibiotics and steroids for a bad chest/asthma attack and was on BP meds by the end of pregnancy. I did worry about them

Penny Dreadful · 01-12-2015 10:27am

I have one or two cups of tea per day and I did so on my first pregnancy too. I really don't think thats a problem.
Food wise, I don't go near pate or liver and have no issue with that at all. I have one dinner that feta cheese is an ingredient in and I eat it occasionally. I buy the cheese that day and use it immediately. I did that on my first pregnancy too and there were no issues.
I know you're meant to avoid shell fish but I had a mad thing for prawns last time around and I do again this time. Occasionally I give in and go to Teppanyiaki (sp) where they are cooked right in front of me so thats ok too.
I've had cold meats- mostly if its something I've cooked myself and I know has been stored safely in the fridge.
I've had two glasses of prosecco and on my first pregnancy I had a grand total of 3 drinks and enjoyed each and every one of those glasses of wine or champagne. Mostly though the smell of alcohol turns my stomach - white wines are occasionally not vomit inducing.:o
I think what you decide is ok for you and your pregnancy is ok - within reason. I do have a problem with smoking, drinking heavily and eating badly - by that I don't mean the cold cuts or such like but more lots of junk food. That said the one time I see someone tucking into a snack box might be the one and only time during their pregnancy that they decide to eat that and really what business is it of mine.

Kathy22 · 01-12-2015 12:39pm

I gave up drinking when I found out I was pregnant, did have a few weekends away before then where I was out and had a few drinks and it did stress me out to no end in the first few months but I found out around the 5 week mark so I hope all is OK. I figured I have had lots of time in life to enjoy myself so I don't need it now. I had a few sips of champagne at 2 weddings where I was not at a stage to tell anybody yet but that has been it. I accepted wine at dinner and just didn't bother drinking it. I don't enjoy alcohol really mainly because the idea of drinking it makes me feel guilty so I don't drink it. I don't think I would bother when out for dinner but I might take a sip from my husbands for the taste.

I was a coffee and pepsi max fiend before pregnancy. I replaced Pepsi max for sparkling water and diet 7up and I have kind of gone off coffee. I have had the odd nespresso at home at the weekend but don't crave it so just don't bother with it. I love tea so I have continued to drink that. I have alternated with cups of decaf tea.

I agree with other posters who say it is the mothers choice, everything in moderation. There is so much scare mongering online about this and that. I have come across articles saying not to drink certain herbal teas containing hibiscus and rosehip amongst other things and fruit like pineapple which I craved loads of. Anyway everything in moderation is my motto. I would not condone heavy drinking, drugs and smoking. I have seen smoking mothers outside the Rotunda when I go for my appointment and I definately judge inside. I was a smoker before pregnancy but it turns my stomach now, so many smokers in Dublin!

ChewChew · 01-12-2015 1:58pm

I'm not a tea or coffee drinker so that wasn't an issue for me. I did, massively, miss my beers and wine when I was pregnant and it was the one thing I truly wanted. At Christmas I was about 14 weeks pregnant so bad one glass of mulled wine and that was it. If I saw someone take a drink, I certainly wouldn't judge. Smoking, imo, is a different story. Looking back now, I'm glad I was strict on the no alcohol as I have a beautiful, healthy baby girl and if I was to become pregnant again I'm not sure I'd be as strict. Won't know until that time comes I suppose.

Neyite · 01-12-2015 3:47pm

I had been TTC for a while so I'd already cut back on teas and coffee, down to one big mug a day, in the morning. I continued that throughout pregnancy and breastfeeding. I don't smoke, quit several years before I got pregnant, and I'm not a big drinker and often volunteer to be a designated driver on nights out.

I actually craved beer during pregnancy - linked to a vitamin b deficiency I was told, so I enjoyed different types of non-alcoholic beers throughout. I had mulled wine once or twice in the middle of my pregnancy, but I did water it down and had it simmering away for a while in order to try to burn off alcohol a bit.

I've been trained in safe food handling so I've been pretty confident that my own food prep and storage was done in a safe way. I think I only strictly avoided runny eggs, some cheeses and shellfish.

I didn't avoid anything while breastfeeding I think. I would have the occasional drink after the last feed of the evening, and a couple of times I was at a wedding or something I pumped and dumped.

For me, like a previous poster, I was happy to abstain, mostly for my own peace of mind. If I did have a session, or eat something 'dangerous' the inevitable worryfest afterwards would have been likely more detrimental to my pregnant well-being than what I'd just consumed.

The only time I had something said to me was when I drank a can of coke in front of someone. But it was a family member so I didn't mind. If it was a stranger, I think I would have been very irked and likely had Words. .

meeeeh · 01-12-2015 4:23pm

I drank an odd glass of wine, I don't know how many but probably about one per month or so. During my first pregnancy I was out and there was a girl drowning vodka shots. She started chatting to me because I was the size of a whale at the time and told me she too is five months pregnant. I definitely judged her.

During second (successful) pregnancy I was told by doctor who saw me at early check up to abstain from sex, coffee and alcohol. Sex and alcohol were a lot easier to give up than coffee. At about 16 weeks I had appointment with my consultant and asked him if I still have to be so strict around coffee. He laughed and told me that they would have no kids if his wife had to s Tay away from coffee and wine. I did switch from espresso to instant because espresso actually made me tired but that was the end of coffee abstinence.

I had three miscarriages but in no way I blame them on caffeine or alcohol. I was very healthy during pregnancies, my diet was fairly good and I never needed any supplements. Miscarriages happen because there is something wrong with foetus, in no way I am going to blame myself for it just because I had a glass of wine or stood next to microwave.

etymon · 02-12-2015 8:45am

Neyite wrote: »

The only time I had something said to me was when I drank a can of coke in front of someone.

That is really ridiculous. This is part of my point - most pregnant ladies abstain from drinking during pregnancy but if they want to have occasional alcohol there is no reason they shouldn't... if people are talking about Coke there's no hope!

IvyTheTerrible · 02-12-2015 11:15am

I haven't cut down on caffeine, I have 3 mugs a day. I don't drink more because, ugh, peeing, and also, if I drink tea after 4pm I won't sleep properly.

I don't drink but then I'm not a big drinker to be honest (although at the start of both pregnancies I drank more than usual - because of big family events etc when I didn't know I was pregnant. No point worrying about that, that's what my doc said!).
Some people are very quick to judge, for example, I like to have a beer in the summer and this summer I had non-alcohol, of course it's not written on the glass that there's no alcohol, so you'll get people giving you funny looks!

With regards to food, I'm a bit more relaxed this time around. Ok, I don't eat unpasteurised cheese, and I won't have the traditional oysters at Christmas dinner but I have my eggs runny, and medium rare meat is not making me panic (I have antibodies to toxoplasmosis so it's grand).

dori_dormer · 02-12-2015 11:48am

I'd say I had a total of 4 glasses of wine throughout my last pregnancy ( one the night I went into labour!)

This time I'm so Ill ( just out of hospital) that I can barely keep down bread and water. So alcohol is way down the list of priorities.

Once sickness passes and into 2nd trimester I just avoid food that's been sitting out ages in delis etc. don't know how I'll cope without 99s and baby due in July this time lol!
All other restrictions don't bother me, I like my meat med well, don't much care for seafood or cheeses. Only thing I like is chicken liver pate. It bothered me last pregnancy as our fave restaurant had it.
I used to crave diet 7up last time. Restricted myself to one can a day. Not a massive tea drinker so currently on about 2 half cups a day to help with nausea.

Everything in moderation!

Neyite · 02-12-2015 2:48pm

etymon wrote: »

That is really ridiculous. This is part of my point - most pregnant ladies abstain from drinking during pregnancy but if they want to have occasional alcohol there is no reason they shouldn't... if people are talking about Coke there's no hope!

It was ridiculous. I needed a fizzy drink after peeling a vat of spuds for a massive family dinner. The person that said it to me would have quite different ideas to me and I'm used to us having a different take on things. And its family. Different if its a judgey colleague or stranger.

the_sonandmoon · 02-12-2015 3:45pm

I'm only 8 weeks in, so not having had a drink isn't much of an achievement yet!

I am salivating at the prospect of a glass of champagne on Christmas day though. But, considering the amount of food I'm throwing out these days (and I hate waste), because I thought I fancied it, but then couldn't face it when it came to eating it, who knows how I will be feeling about a glass bubbles in 3 weeks. At the moment, wine smells like paint stripper. If I'm able for it though, I wont feel bad about having a glass, and I will savour it.

I've cut out caffeine, mostly. On days that I'm really tired Ill have a cuppa tea for a boost, but otherwise its decaf and rooibos, and other herbals. I had been limiting my caffeine intake before I got pregnant anyway, because I was TTC and also am a rubbish sleeper.

So far the only cheeses I've had have been hard (cheddar, parmesan and gouda), and cream cheese. I think I will allow myself some cooked soft cheese (mmm white, crusty bread dipped into melted cooleeny) at some point, if I'm in need of a proper cheese hit.

I think I smoked when I was pregnant, if not I was nearly pregnant (I'm an ex smoker who would have indulged on the odd big night out, or when out with certain bad influence friends!). I certainly did drink. Nothing I can do about that now. Just hope that I have done any damage, and keep doing the best that I can.

the_sonandmoon · 02-12-2015 3:52pm

Oh, and I certainly wouldn't judge a grown woman for having the odd drink. I've been to many a wedding lately with pregnant friends, who so look forward to that glass of wine/prosecco that they allow themselves at a special occasion. Actually, now that I think of it, Ive been out for fairly non-special occasions (i.e. just catching up over dinner) with my heavily pregnant friend who will sometimes decide that she will have a glass of wine.

Whatever - these are highly educated women who make informed decisions about their bodies. If they have decided that an occasional glass of wine is ok to put into their bodies, Id respect them enough to make that decision.

Smiley11 · 02-12-2015 6:10pm

I've heard of pregnant women being absolutely lambasted for having a drink & I think its completely inappropriate...as for criticism for having a Coke....there are no words.

I have an occasional glass of wine because its my favourite drink. I'd never open a bottle if I'm home alone because it'd be a terrible waste when I have one glass at most. I don't have any more than that because I don't want it. I don't buy the small bottles of wine because I just don't like the quality so I'd rather have a glass of a lovely wine from a proper bottle. My poor ol husband has been quite groggy some weekend mornings during this pregnancy after drinking most of the bottle

Its not about the alcohol, its about the enjoyment & I think we bloody deserve it once in a while!

I'd be interested to see one iota of proof that having a small amount of alcohol causes any harm whatsoever to a baby. I don't think such proof exists to be honest & judgemental people will judge no matter what. I heard of a new mother smoking & drinking a can of Dutch Gold outside a maternity hospital recently...now thats just classless!

meeeeh · 02-12-2015 6:37pm

In fairness I don't think that classiness is the problem there.

I must say I am perfectly oblivious to any disapproval directed my way for drinking coffee, wine or coke. I love chowder and I ordered it once and almost cried when I got it and realized that mussels are in it. It's probably the only food I really strictly avoided.

02-12-2015 6:49pm

Thumpette wrote: »

Different perspective here, but a perspective all the same. My baby was stillborn almost a year ago at 41+4. I didn't drink anything or eat anything they don't recommend (or smoke or anything that's deemed dangerous).

On advice that will haunt me for the rest of my life I had one glass of wine the day before my son died. I've been told it had nothing to do with it (it was an undiagnosed placental issue) however I will always wonder if that one glass of wine might have made the difference that meant the placenta couldn't hold out that one extra day he needed. When I am pregnant again I will never ever touch anything that is even vaguely a risk. It's so not worth the risk.

For most people a glass of wine here and there won't do any harm, but the truth is there could be an underlying issue where it could make a real difference.

Best of luck for happy and healthy pregnancies girls X

When you lose a baby, no matter what stage you are at, you will always look for reasons. This is normal. Don't be hard on yourself.

olaola · 02-12-2015 8:51pm

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

With regards to food, I'm a bit more relaxed this time around. Ok, I don't eat unpasteurised cheese, and I won't have the traditional oysters at Christmas dinner but I have my eggs runny, and medium rare meat is not making me panic (I have antibodies to toxoplasmosis so it's grand).

How did you find out about the antibodies? Did you specifically ask for a test? I'm wondering if I have them... (kinda wishing) as I would eat a lot of 'high risk' foods normally. I've made an informed decision about eggs, as long as they're Bord Bia eggs. They're all vaccinated against salmonella, and afaik there have been no cases of salmonella being found IN the egg (I think there was approx 1 in 8000 of it on the shell?) I know in the UK all British Lion eggs have been deemed safe to eat.

IvyTheTerrible · 02-12-2015 9:37pm

olaola wrote: »

How did you find out about the antibodies? Did you specifically ask for a test? I'm wondering if I have them... (kinda wishing) as I would eat a lot of 'high risk' foods normally. I've made an informed decision about eggs, as long as they're Bord Bia eggs. They're all vaccinated against salmonella, and afaik there have been no cases of salmonella being found IN the egg (I think there was approx 1 in 8000 of it on the shell?) I know in the UK all British Lion eggs have been deemed safe to eat.

Here in France, it's one of the first blood tests you get in pregnancy, along with things like rubella immunity, syphilis, iron levels etc. Isn't it done automatically in Ireland?

olaola · 02-12-2015 9:44pm

IvyTheTerrible wrote: »

Here in France, it's one of the first blood tests you get in pregnancy, along with things like rubella immunity, syphilis, iron levels etc. Isn't it done automatically in Ireland?

Ahhh! I was thinking. I did read a paper about that. Nope, it's not mentioned here at all. I did bring it up with my GP last time, but not sure how I'd go about it! That paper is interesting, and the conclusions are very relevant to what's happening here at the moment! What happens if you do find out? In France, you can opt for a termination (if the infection happens in the first 10 weeks) here, it's a little more complicated!

Does anyone drink?

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