Those embarressing... erections

Denerick · 20-04-2009 7:33pm #1

I would like to think that I am not the only male in the world to have ever suffered an embarressing erection in a public place. Off the top of my head, I recall it happening at the following places:

My grand aunt's funeral... going up for communion.
Mass in general when I was a horny young toad and still living at home.
In school (10-20,000 times)
At College (10-15 times over three years. I seem to be less aroused these days. Maybe something to do with more booze and less exercise)
In a shop I used to work in.
This morning on a bus when i desperately needed to get off at my stop.

we all have them, and usually make a pretty good job covering them up. But when you get them at a time you really could do without them, how the hell are you supposed to get rid of them? I used to think Sonia from Eastenders would cure me, but that doesn't work ever since I saw her in the front cover of a glossy not looking near as bad as she used to.

What the hell does everyone else do???

RandolphEsq · 20-04-2009 7:36pm

Nip and tuck

NADA · 20-04-2009 7:36pm

Yeah I know what you mean. Hard luck mate!

Captain-America · 20-04-2009 7:37pm

Looks like you've been in a few sticky situations.

jester77 · 20-04-2009 7:37pm

You obviously not much of a wanker

bleg · 20-04-2009 7:37pm

tuck it in under your belt

Denerick · 20-04-2009 7:39pm

There's simply no way of nipping and tucking effectively though... How can you do that on a busy city bus???

Usually my bag covers my front in a rather conspicuous manner. Ah well, better than being done for public indecency or something!

Insect Overlord · 20-04-2009 7:40pm

Take it out and wave it at everybody, everyone looks away.

Problem solved!

Mimikyu · 20-04-2009 7:44pm

This post has been deleted.

galwayrush · 20-04-2009 7:46pm

It's refreshing to know it's in working order,

Don' worry about them.

congo_90 · 20-04-2009 7:49pm

There have been some terrible times! had one coming home in a taxi with a friend.. bit of a bumpy journey.. I was wearing tracksuit bottoms and in the front seat! oh well.
It's funny in school when someone is caught out. I'll never forget some lad in my class who got an erection in a class with a teacher who had large boobs but a ronnie too ugh. He wasn't ashamed of it either

This was an all lads school too so I wonder how he came out haha

Hagar · 20-04-2009 7:49pm

I used just tuck it into the top of my sock to prevent just such embarassing moments.

Abi · 20-04-2009 7:51pm

Not for some perhaps, but it makes me laugh if I catch a guy with one. The guy is hardly (excuse non-intended pun) being perverted, its unvoluntary.

beardo81 · 20-04-2009 7:52pm

Is it embarressing if I have one writing this?

:eek:

galwayrush · 20-04-2009 7:53pm

Hagar wrote: »

I used just tuck it into the top of my sock to prevent just such embarassing moments.

f
Excellent, until you forget which leg it's strapped to.:p

Woger · 20-04-2009 7:56pm

Watching Babe.

challengemaster · 20-04-2009 7:57pm

Denerick wrote: »

This morning on a bus when i desperately needed to get off

wilson10 · 20-04-2009 7:57pm

Denerick wrote: »

I would like to think that I am not the only male in the world to have ever suffered an embarressing erection in a public place. Off the top of my head, I recall it happening at the following places:

My grand aunt's funeral... going up for communion.
Mass in general when I was a horny young toad and still living at home.
In school (10-20,000 times)
At College (10-15 times over three years. I seem to be less aroused these days. Maybe something to do with more booze and less exercise)
In a shop I used to work in.
This morning on a bus when i desperately needed to get off at my stop.

we all have them, and usually make a pretty good job covering them up. But when you get them at a time you really could do without them, how the hell are you supposed to get rid of them? I used to think Sonia from Eastenders would cure me, but that doesn't work ever since I saw her in the front cover of a glossy not looking near as bad as she used to.

What the hell does everyone else do???

You really need to get a grip, man.

wilson10 · 20-04-2009 7:58pm

Woger wrote: »

Watching Babe.

As in the little pig ?

Woger · 20-04-2009 8:00pm

wilson10 wrote: »

As in the little pig ?

It wasn't that little.

nomorebadtown · 20-04-2009 8:02pm

hard in pocket, grab offending erection and pull to the side a bit. dont pull too much though or the situation may deteriorate.

wilson10 · 20-04-2009 8:08pm

Confucious say, "Man with hole in pocket can feel cocky all day"

kowloon · 20-04-2009 8:08pm

Get those inflatable trousers.

sam34 · 20-04-2009 8:11pm

nomorebadtown wrote: »

hard in pocket, grab offending erection and pull to the side a bit. dont pull too much though or the situation may deteriorate.

reminds me of that joke - man is explaining sex to his innocent virgin bride. he goes on to tell her "to let me know you want sex, just pull my cock once. to let me know you dont want sex, pull it 100 times"

Redzer7 · 20-04-2009 8:13pm

Put An Elastic Banned Around Your Waste And Jus Tuck It In

That Should do The Trick

dublinario · 20-04-2009 8:38pm

I once pitched a tent while pitching a tent. The other scout leaders asked me to resign, shortly thereafter.

Duff · 20-04-2009 8:44pm

The old flickaroo is the only way to half decently cover it..

Maddison · 20-04-2009 8:45pm

An File wrote: »

Take it out and wave it at everybody, everyone looks away.

Problem solved!

ROFL!!!!!!

K4t · 20-04-2009 9:00pm

Denerick wrote: »

My grand aunt's funeral... going up for communion.

I like necrophilia as much as the next man but ffs, your gran?

Denerick wrote: »

What the hell does everyone else do???

I think of Mary Harney.

Denerick · 20-04-2009 9:01pm

wilson10 wrote: »

You really need to get a grip, man.

Unfortunately one can only get a grip in the privacy of one's own home. Might try waggling it out in front of me next time in a public place, while running around screaming 'look away, look away!' whilst simultaneously smacking myself in the forehead. People might simply take pity on me rather than snigger...

Denerick · 20-04-2009 9:02pm

K4t wrote: »

I like necrophilia as much as the next man but ffs, your gran?
[ quote]

Nah, my gran aunt. Didn't know her and there was some hot women at the funeral.

Totally unrelated of course...

K4t · 20-04-2009 9:08pm

Denerick wrote: »

K4t wrote: »

I like necrophilia as much as the next man but ffs, your gran?
[ quote]

Nah, my gran aunt. Didn't know her and there was some hot women at the funeral.

Totally unrelated of course...

You could have knocked one out while at her coffin, cumshot to the face.

Redzer7 · 20-04-2009 9:09pm

Lol

Gummy Panda · 20-04-2009 9:14pm

Buy a extra large notebook

Insect Overlord · 20-04-2009 9:15pm

Too far K4t, too far.

YraggarY · 20-04-2009 9:15pm

K4t wrote: »

K4t wrote: »

You could have knocked one out while at her coffin, cumshot to the face.

:eek: :eek: :eek:

Denerick · 20-04-2009 9:17pm

YraggarY wrote: »

K4t wrote: »

:eek: :eek: :eek:

I now see how easy it is for 'misquotes' to happen

YraggarY · 20-04-2009 9:19pm

Sorry 'bout that! Should really try get to grips (no pun intended!!) with this whole posting system..

FIXED!

Bobeagleburger · 20-04-2009 9:22pm

K4t wrote: »

Denerick wrote: »

You could have knocked one out while at her coffin, cumshot to the face.

After Hours......wonderful !!

irlirishkev · 20-04-2009 9:23pm

Always happens when I need to get off the bus! I find saying the alphabet backwards in my head helps.. Problem is, I've said it backwards so many times now, I know it off by heart!

(uh oh.. zyxwvu..)

The Davestator · 20-04-2009 9:33pm

Denerick wrote: »

I used to think Sonia from Eastenders would cure me, but that doesn't work ever since I saw her in the front cover of a glossy not looking near as bad as she used to.

What the hell does everyone else do???

So Fcuking funny. I used to think about dead wet puppies in a bag or Margaret Thatcher

AckwelFoley · 20-04-2009 9:37pm

..yea, dont get them as much anymore...

ive got a few when doing the shopping at toys r us. Generally i go down to the Hannah Montanna merchandise isle and hammer one out and im sorted for another few hours

arybvtcw0eolkf · 20-04-2009 9:42pm

snyper wrote: »

..yea, dont get them as much anymore...

ive got a few when doing the shopping at toys r us. Generally i go down to the Hannah Montanna merchandise isle and hammer one out and im sorted for another few hours

When I get one I use my to pole vault down the isle's - impresses the shit out of the little kiddies.

.

dr.bollocko · 20-04-2009 9:44pm

Gabriella Rancid Torpedo wrote: »

When I get one I use my to pole vault down the isle's - impresses the shit out of the little kiddies.

.

Well frankly that's a beautiful image we can all enjoy for a second.

AckwelFoley · 20-04-2009 9:46pm

dr.bollocko wrote: »

Well frankly that's a beautiful image we can all enjoy for a second.

..a split second

Diabhal Beag · 20-04-2009 9:48pm

I was at a wedding talking to the bride and up pops the biggest Kenny Rodger I ever had. It nearly ripped off my body. It didn't go unnoticed either

K4t · 20-04-2009 10:03pm

Last year at school was unbearable. Everyday in the same two classes I was as hard as a rock. It's quite exciting as if you're asked to stand up or come up to the fine bitche's desk you are truly f**ked. School days are the best days of your life.

20-04-2009 10:10pm

Suffer.

Y-fronts. Keeps him in check.

galwayrush · 20-04-2009 10:15pm

Getting one in a taxi car in Letterkenny would be a bad idea.;)

K4t · 20-04-2009 10:34pm

galwayrush wrote: »

Getting one in a taxi car in Letterkenny would be a bad idea.;)

Admirable thread reference. You're becoming a pro. Keep it up (Agh).

Tar.Aldarion · 20-04-2009 10:37pm

So yeah, I was teaching primary school kids, and whoever said picture them in their underwear to feel more confident is in for it. :mad::mad::mad:

Those embarressing... erections

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