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Tinder weight filter

245678

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    Years ago I went on an internet date and found the girl to be way heavier than her pictures indicated. Had been nervous going because I thought I was playing near the top of my league.

    Really couldn’t understand why she put up those pics, she was going to be rumbled as soon as anyone met her.

    I went on a date with a girl before and she was so heavy in real life that I didn't recognise her, she had to approach me and be like "Hi, it's me".

    In her photos she looked like a pretty standard size 12 at best, and they were full body shots so not just flattering angles.

    In person she was I would say size 20? Big is an understatement. I honestly did not recognise her, and even when I realised it was her, I still couldn't marry this person in front of me with the profile, at all.

    Still went on the date and had a good time because she was good fun, but yeah, I just don't get what people hope to achieve by such wanton deceit, I would imagine not everyone would be as polite about it.

    Reminds me of a female friend who went on a date with a guy, in his photos he just looked like an average decent guy, but when she met him, he was pretty fat...and bald.

    "Oh yeah, haha, that was me 10 years ago...."

    Why bother? What's to be gained?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,812 ✭✭✭Addle


    Dammit Phyllis!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,812 ✭✭✭Addle


    Why bother? What's to be gained?

    More weight, as she comfort eats after suffering yet another rejection.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,068 ✭✭✭Specialun


    the fat ones apperciate it more


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 710 ✭✭✭ginandtonicsky



    Why bother? What's to be gained?

    The only thing I can think is that it gives them more options when they're swiping, more seemingly interested men, and then maybe they might win them over with their radiant personality when they meet in person. A sort of self-deception too.

    I can't imagine the anxiety of waiting to meet a stranger off the internet knowing you look nothing like your profile pics. It's hard enough as it is with the wondering if ye'll get on, will we have to suffer through awkward conversation etc - but imagine adding to that the fact that there's been some blatant false advertising and he's signed up for another person than who you actually are?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,145 ✭✭✭Mister Vain


    There's a new dating app that only allows you to match with people of other ethnicities, because if you're a white man and you're only attracted to white women, well that's racist apparently.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,033 ✭✭✭✭Richard Hillman


    I was on another dating site about 10 years ago and you can describe your body shape as "Average", "A few extra pounds" etc. The problem was, when a lady says a few extra pounds she could be in fantastic shape. Then you get morbidly obese women saying "A few extra pounds"


  • Posts: 0 Anna Yummy Syntax


    There's a new dating app that only allows you to match with people of other ethnicities, because if you're a white man and you're only attracted to white women, well that's racist apparently.

    Does that mean travellers can find each other easier? :pac:


  • Registered Users Posts: 95 ✭✭PapaOscar


    There's a new dating app that only allows you to match with people of other ethnicities, because if you're a white man and you're only attracted to white women, well that's racist apparently.

    FFS, is there people that actually think that?


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,474 ✭✭✭Obvious Desperate Breakfasts


    doylefe wrote: »
    Why doesn't tinder have a weight filter? I should be able to choose to only appear to non fat girls.

    Most of the likes I get are from fat ones. The gall of them. I'm in good shape. Why would they think I'm interested in an over weight person?

    I presume they make no assumptions about you at all, not knowing you personally.


  • Posts: 0 [Deleted User]


    I love how women can get away with saying no one under 6 ft and there's no uproar but god forbid if a man mentions a womans appearance

    weight problems = easy mode

    height problems = hard mode


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 8,474 ✭✭✭Obvious Desperate Breakfasts


    Why call women either? It's just that that bravado from grown men is unnecessary. Women don't refer to men as things.

    Don't think that's the case on this thread though. Personally I cringe at women doing that too. Really lets the side down. If a man isn't attracted to overweight women, that's just his involuntary preference, which there is nothing wrong with. I don't care if he even puts it in his profile, because weight can be lost.

    Whereas women who say 6ft only are discriminating based on something a man can't control. And they're ruling out lots of great guys who are maybe 5ft 9 or 10. But I doubt any well adjusted guy would want to get involved with a woman who puts that stupid specification on her profile.

    But, like with weight, it’s an involuntary preference for some women. It’s neither here nor there that a man can’t make himself taller, if a woman prefers tall men, she can’t help that just as a man might prefer a slim women.

    I don’t think any woman should mention it on her profile but I think it’s a bit much to suggest that a woman who preferably likes tall men isn’t going to suit a well-adjusted guy. And even if she doesn’t mention it on her profile, she’ll be mentally using it as a filter. You mentioned involuntary preferences in your post. Wouldn’t liking tall men be one?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,482 ✭✭✭Gimme A Pound


    I understand a preference for men her own height or taller (and men can prefer women not being taller than them) but that doesn't always have to mean 6ft.

    It's not so much a preference for taller men but specifying a particular height, like a guy saying "must be size 8-10".


  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 12,812 Mod ✭✭✭✭riffmongous


    There's a new dating app that only allows you to match with people of other ethnicities, because if you're a white man and you're only attracted to white women, well that's racist apparently.
    And is everyone is being forced to sign up to it?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,203 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack


    doylefe wrote: »
    Why doesn't tinder have a weight filter? I should be able to choose to only appear to non fat girls.

    Most of the likes I get are from fat ones. The gall of them. I'm in good shape. Why would they think I'm interested in an over weight person?


    Tinder doesn’t have a weight filter because they’re a business, not a public service. If you’re on the app, you’re a target for anyone, same as girls on the app who complain about being messaged constantly by overweight guys. They’re chancing their arm, same as the women do with you.

    I’d say even if you put it in your description, it would be likely to have the opposite effect from social justice warrior types just looking to show you “the errror of your ways” :pac:


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,203 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack


    I understand a preference for men her own height or taller (and men can prefer women not being taller than them) but that doesn't always have to mean 6ft.

    It's not so much a preference for taller men but specifying a particular height, like a guy saying "must be size 8-10".


    Cuts out a lot of the tyre kickers and chancers really is all, well, it’s intended to anyway! It’s just narrowing down the criteria to the point where your chances of being matched with your ideal person are higher than just playing “pin the tail on the donkey and hope for the best” sort of thing. You’ll be matching with less people, but higher quality is all.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 39,601 ✭✭✭✭Mellor


    doylefe wrote: »
    Most of the likes I get are from fat ones.

    How do you know you are getting likes from fatties? Unless you are liking them yourself?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 24,203 ✭✭✭✭One eyed Jack


    Mellor wrote: »
    How do you know you are getting likes from fatties? Unless you are liking them yourself?


    Kinda reminds me of American Beauty, like the OP is publicly in denial, is disgusted by women who are overweight, but in private is tugging the skeleton out of himself browsing the BBW section on Pornhub :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,844 ✭✭✭✭somesoldiers


    Mellor wrote: »
    doylefe wrote: »
    Most of the likes I get are from fat ones.

    How do you know you are getting likes from fatties? Unless you are liking them yourself?
    He explained that earlier, something about seeing pixelated versions of people that like you so you can tell the size but not exactly see the face if I understand it


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,844 ✭✭✭✭somesoldiers


    Mellor wrote: »
    doylefe wrote: »
    Most of the likes I get are from fat ones.

    How do you know you are getting likes from fatties? Unless you are liking them yourself?
    OP explained that earlier, something about seeing pixelated versions of people that like you so you can tell the size but not exactly see the face if I understand it


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,181 ✭✭✭chrissb8


    Met my current GF off tinder. Had weight on her, didn't care because she was just an amazing person and I was attracted to her as result of that.
    She ended up losing 3.5 stone over the last year which while she looks better than ever I wouldn't have cared if she stayed as she was.
    Basically what I'm getting at is that weight is just that. Weight, you can just lose it when you really want to. What you are missing out on is the amazing person they are and what you could potentially be together. That doesn't mean you have to give every big girl a chance but just don't be closed off to it when you're getting along with someone just because of some superficial reason.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,181 ✭✭✭chrissb8


    Accidently reposted.....


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 26,658 ✭✭✭✭OldMrBrennan83


    She'll end up trading you in now.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 612 ✭✭✭KevinCavan


    I know a friend of my gf who takes amazing photos of herself, despite her big build. Headshots are a big giveaway in my opinion. If they don’t show their body in the photo, it’s not worth showing.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,812 ✭✭✭✭sbsquarepants


    Gimme a pound means you want your arse ridden.... perhaps tinder is exactly what you need!

    :D

    I was born too soon for the whole internet dating thing (it's my single biggest regret!) I mean I do love sluts and I have a phone - would have took to that shít like a duck to water!

    But from what few snippets I've gleaned from reading about people who actually have lives - getting the arse pounded off you is more of a grinder thing;)


  • Registered Users Posts: 28 jellybellyelly


    Plenty of Fish has a weight filter - but potential dates can circumvent it by answering 'prefer not to say' to the body type question rather than answering more directly, so they're not filtered out of your matches.

    I'm a 'big' girl and am upfront about it, I don't post edited photos or headshots hoping some guy will be so bowled over by my personality and my size will be immaterial - I get that we're visual creatures and physical attraction matters, and irrespective of size, hair colour etc you can't be everyone's cup of tea. That's what I like about Tinder - it's a split second decision on whether someone physically does it for you or not. I don't think a screening question is needed, just swipe left ;)


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,671 ✭✭✭GarIT


    PapaOscar wrote: »
    FFS, is there people that actually think that?

    I'm sure there are. I was briefly (less than a week) harassed online and labelled transphobic for deciding to stop talking to a woman I had been because she was born with and still had a penis.

    Had a similar story in real life with a fat girl. A few friends tried to set me up with the fat one in the group because I was the ugly one and I was told I was things like mysoginistic and shallow for not going there.

    I do have to say about tinder that sometimes I swipe right on everyone without even looking and I get a lot more matches from women I'm not attracted to than women I am. Obviously though the idea is you pick who you like as you're swiping.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 12,615 ✭✭✭✭mariaalice


    I went out briefly with someone who was well over 6 foot and he had this theory that he should save himself for tall women as it was more difficult for tall women to meet someone he had a long-term girlfriend who was 6 foot tall he was only half joking.

    I would be a more go with the flow and see what happens type.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,698 ✭✭✭Feisar


    I feel sorry for people that feel the need to crop pics of themselves. I don't mean that in any sort of condesending way or anthing.

    What sort of thoughts go through someones head as they get ready for a first date knowing full well the other person has only seen them with rose tinted glasses on?

    First they came for the socialists...



  • Registered Users Posts: 28 jellybellyelly


    Feisar wrote: »
    I feel sorry for people that feel the need to crop pics of themselves. I don't mean that in any sort of condesending way or anthing.

    What sort of thoughts go through someones head as they get ready for a first date knowing full well the other person has only seen them with rose tinted glasses on?

    Most likely similar to what goes through the minds of all the guys who lie about their height on Tinder :D I presume they think the right woman won't care.

    There's a whole generation of guys who are 5ft11+ in their minds...maybe in heels, if they stood on a chair, on their tiptoes.... :P


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 466 ✭✭c6ysaphjvqw41k


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,698 ✭✭✭Feisar


    Most likely similar to what goes through the minds of all the guys who lie about their height on Tinder :D I presume they think the right woman won't care.

    There's a whole generation of guys who are 5ft11+ in their minds...maybe in heels, if they stood on a chair, on their tiptoes.... :P

    Here, yer talking to a lad that spent his adult life thinking he was 6'3''. I'm 6'2'' and a hair, Dad measured me once and made me up to 6'3''! Must have had thick socks on that day.

    First they came for the socialists...



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 40,513 ✭✭✭✭ohnonotgmail


    Feisar wrote: »
    Here, yer talking to a lad that spent his adult life thinking he was 6'3''. I'm 6'2'' and a hair, Dad measured me once and made me up to 6'3''! Must have had thick socks on that day.


    bit of a difference between that and telling everyone you are 6' when you are really 5'9"


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,698 ✭✭✭Feisar


    bit of a difference between that and telling everyone you are 6' when you are really 5'9"

    I was being a little flippant.

    First they came for the socialists...



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,698 ✭✭✭Feisar


    This post has been deleted.

    Back when I was on it, it was just another sting to my bow.

    First they came for the socialists...



  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 40,513 ✭✭✭✭ohnonotgmail


    Feisar wrote: »
    I was being a little flippant.


    I know.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,164 ✭✭✭Bigbagofcans


    chrissb8 wrote: »
    Met my current GF off tinder. Had weight on her, didn't care because she was just an amazing person and I was attracted to her as result of that.

    Why describe her as current GF? She's your GF. Unless you plan on breaking up soon?


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,164 ✭✭✭Bigbagofcans


    I was born too soon for the whole internet dating thing (it's my single biggest regret!) I mean I do love sluts and I have a phone - would have took to that shít like a duck to water!

    :mad:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 26,658 ✭✭✭✭OldMrBrennan83


    :mad:

    What? Are they banned now too?


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  • Registered Users Posts: 456 ✭✭Jackman25


    chrissb8 wrote: »
    Met my current GF off tinder. Had weight on her, didn't care because she was just an amazing person and I was attracted to her as result of that.

    She ended up losing 3.5 stone over the last year which while she looks better than ever I wouldn't have cared if she stayed as she was.

    Basically what I'm getting at is that weight is just that. Weight, you can just lose it when you really want to. What you are missing out on is the amazing person they are and what you could potentially be together. That doesn't mean you have to give every big girl a chance but just don't be closed off to it when you're getting along with someone just because of some superficial reason.

    A bugbear of mine, but I hate when people describe other people, particularly their partners as amazing.
    The dictionary definition of amazing is "causing astonishment, great wonder, or surprise". That applies to very very few people.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,164 ✭✭✭Bigbagofcans


    Patww79 wrote: »
    What? Are they banned now too?

    It's a very derogatory term. :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,164 ✭✭✭Bigbagofcans


    Jackman25 wrote: »
    A bugbear of mine, but I hate when people describe other people, particularly their partners as amazing.
    The dictionary definition of amazing is "causing astonishment, great wonder, or surprise". That applies to very very few people.

    There are plenty of amazing people out there. To find the love of your life is a pretty amazing feeling.


  • Registered Users Posts: 456 ✭✭Jackman25


    There are plenty of amazing people out there. To find the love of your life is a pretty amazing feeling.

    Nah, there isn't, by definition there cannot be. If everyone is amazing, no one is amazing.

    Amazing feeling maybe, doesn't make them an amazing person.


  • Registered Users Posts: 986 ✭✭✭Prominent_Dawg


    My weight is probably the only thing in my pictures the actually resembles me


  • Registered Users Posts: 27 esme95


    Jackman25 wrote: »
    Nah, there isn't, by definition there cannot be. If everyone is amazing, no one is amazing.

    Amazing feeling maybe, doesn't make them an amazing person.

    Do you go around nit picking and analysing everything everyone says? It's a commonly used expression, get over it.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,852 ✭✭✭Steve F




  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 12,812 Mod ✭✭✭✭riffmongous


    Most likely similar to what goes through the minds of all the guys who lie about their height on Tinder :D I presume they think the right woman won't care.

    There's a whole generation of guys who are 5ft11+ in their minds...maybe in heels, if they stood on a chair, on their tiptoes.... :P
    I remember back in school when height would come up lads telling me I was 6ft because they were and we were the same height.. eh not a chance boss 5,11 tops


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 710 ✭✭✭ginandtonicsky


    Actually that's true, a lot of lads seem to think they're 6 ft! What's that all about?

    Doesn't really affect me as at 5"1 anything above like 5"8 is "tall" to me, but...weird. Wonder if it's the male equivalent of that thing that women apparetently do, where they shave about a stone off their actual weight if they're asked about it publicly :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,164 ✭✭✭Bigbagofcans


    Actually that's true, a lot of lads seem to think they're 6 ft! What's that all about?

    Doesn't really affect me as at 5"1 anything above like 5"8 is "tall" to me, but...weird. Wonder if it's the male equivalent of that thing that women apparetently do, where they shave about a stone off their actual weight if they're asked about it publicly :D

    Men are quite conscious about their height especially when a girl is looking for a 'tall dark and handsome man'.
    I saw on a woman's dating profile before: 'No short men, no bald men and no Asian men, thanks'.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,698 ✭✭✭Feisar


    Actually that's true, a lot of lads seem to think they're 6 ft! What's that all about?

    Doesn't really affect me as at 5"1 anything above like 5"8 is "tall" to me, but...weird. Wonder if it's the male equivalent of that thing that women apparetently do, where they shave about a stone off their actual weight if they're asked about it publicly :D

    Google "six footer". It comes up as a noun describing someone of at least six foot in height?!? The same doesn't happen with five or seven.

    It seems to be some sort of societal thing in people's heads. Plus to lots of women 5'11'' = short, 6' = tall. So one can understand a lad trying to squeeze in an inch here or there.

    Being tall is definately a help with the fairer sex.

    First they came for the socialists...



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