The Pros and Cons of buying a Donkey

Boom_Bap · 01-05-2021 10:19am #1

Can you help me out with a Pros and Cons list for buying a donkey. What I have o far:

Pros

I'll have a donkey
The Tax Credits

Cons

I'll need to buy a bigger bed

Trigger Happy · 01-05-2021 10:21am

Get a wee donkey. Careful you don't end up with an ass. Much harder to get an ass in the passenger seat of a Ford cortina.

SmartinMartin · 01-05-2021 10:23am

He'll be smarter than you.

Andrea B. · 01-05-2021 10:24am

Difficult if living in apartment. Especially above ground floor as very stubborn when it comes to lifts or stairs. Also, they may exceed the weight rating of balcony.
Once bitten, twice shy.

martinedwards · 01-05-2021 10:25am

Shoo in for the kids nativity play

WoollyRedHat · 01-05-2021 10:32am

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Can you help me out with a Pros and Cons list for buying a donkey. What I have o far:

Pros
I'll have a donkey
The Tax Credits

Cons
I'll need to buy a bigger bed

It's hard to get into pubs with a donkey and even if you do, they probably won't serve the donkey.

Padre_Pio · 01-05-2021 10:35am

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

It's hard to get into pubs with a donkey and even if you do, they probably won't serve the donkey.

Of you give the Donkey a name like Ben, people will say "here comes Ben and the donkey'.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 01-05-2021 10:36am

You'd have pletny of hot girls coming up to you and asking if they can pet your ass....

Akrasia · 01-05-2021 10:47am

Either way it’s a big decision, you should definitely mule it over for a while

01-05-2021 10:48am

Con:their noisy animals and roar at yous,if your coming in late at night drunk

Pro: they have a cross on their back,to aim for when landing on em via parachute

The donkey sanctuary in cork is worth a visit though

Ubbquittious · 01-05-2021 10:48am

WoollyRedHat wrote: »

It's hard to get into pubs with a donkey and even if you do, they probably won't serve the donkey.

Any good pub will have a pole outside for tying up your donkey

PhilOssophy · 01-05-2021 10:51am

Akrasia wrote: »

Either way it’s a big decision, you should definitely mule it over for a while

Maybe ask the neigh-bours?

Akrasia · 01-05-2021 10:53am

PhilOssophy wrote: »

Maybe ask the neigh-bours?

Ah Jayses that’s only ass-king for trouble

Gregor Samsa · 01-05-2021 10:54am

People refer to 3 legged donkeys as a “wonky”, but actually 3 legs is the most efficient and stable arrangement of legs, as per tripods and 3 legged stools. So be sure to get a 3 legged one if you have uneven ground and you don’t want it to wobble.

Allinall · 01-05-2021 10:58am

If you can source one without a tail, you can rent it out for kids parties.

It’ll pay for itself in no time.

maudgonner · 01-05-2021 10:59am

PhilOssophy wrote: »

Maybe ask the neigh-bours?

Donkeys don't neigh, they bray. So the OP will have to move to Wicklow.

01-05-2021 11:00am

I’m seeing a lot of pros here, all genuine, and very few cons. Go for it op.

Akrasia · 01-05-2021 11:03am

[Deleted User] wrote: »

I’m seeing alt of pros here, all genuine, and very few cons. Go for it op.

The only donkey Kong is that they tend to throw barrels at you

blade1 · 01-05-2021 11:10am

He'll leave hoof prints on the lino.

Hee Haw Hee Haw Hee H'always does that.

01-05-2021 11:15am

I love donkeys.

To anyone reading this, if you have any money at all to spare, give it to the Donkey Sanctuary. Donkeys have particularly urgent foot-care needs, because they originate from hardened climates where their feet are naturally worn by their environment, but can over-grow on Irish soil.. The Irish Donkey Sanctuary go all around the country, tending to donkeys' feet.

To the OP, if you have half an acre of grass and the time and temperament for a donkey, you will be richly rewarded.

They are fantastic creatures. Very intelligent. Biblically modest, none of the haughty arrogance of horses. It should come as no surprise that Jesus Christ rode into Jerusalem on the back of the same animal that carried his pregnant mother into Bethlehem. Everybody's life is enriched by having a donkey in it. Nobody in human history has regretted befriending a donkey.

machiavellianme · 01-05-2021 11:24am

The only good donkey is the one that wins the Donkey Derby. The rest are all losers.

maudgonner · 01-05-2021 12:24pm

Plus: we can all call around to your house for live action Buckaroo!

I'll start collecting mining equipment pronto.

Mad_maxx · 01-05-2021 12:39pm

Ubbquittious wrote: »

Any good pub will have a pole outside for tying up your donkey

those are saloons you are thinking of barkeep

some random drunk · 01-05-2021 12:52pm

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Can you help me out with a Pros and Cons list for buying a donkey.

The donkey market is way overheated at the moment. Would you not consider renting a donkey for the time being and see what the future brings?

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 01-05-2021 1:17pm

Mad_maxx wrote: »

those are saloons you are thinking of barkeep

Claerly, you've never been to Mayo...

Ubbquittious · 01-05-2021 2:28pm

Mad_maxx wrote: »

those are saloons you are thinking of barkeep

No there was one in Ballincollig. Had a thatched roof, red wooden windows and doors. Twas definitely a pub. The Auld Fox it was called. You could tell if your friends were inside because you recognised the donkeys. Fierce handy altogether

Padre_Pio · 01-05-2021 2:55pm

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

I love donkeys.

To anyone reading this, if you have any money at all to spare, give it to the Donkey Sanctuary.

Reminds me of this

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZfiWoVbd3jk

McGinniesta · 01-05-2021 3:22pm

Ubbquittious wrote: »

Any good pub will have a pole outside for tying up your donkey

The best pubs will serve your donkey a few pints.

wexandproud · 01-05-2021 4:39pm

the local idiot and a donkey walked into a bar and the bar man asked where did ya get him '' i won him in a raffel '' said the Donkey

Archeron · 01-05-2021 4:44pm

You'll finally have something good to do with all that lettuce you grew in your windowbox over lockdown.

byhookorbycrook · 01-05-2021 4:51pm

Donkeys are social creatures . They bray a lot if they are alone , which is why the donkey sanctuary boards them out as pairs .
They will need a field shelter that they can enter and exit as they wish .

You need to have a farrier who will give them the proper foot care as mentioned .
I’d say you’d need at least a few acres , so that you can “ rest” paddocks as needed .

They are wonderful animals . When I win the Lotto , I will re-home a few pairs from the Donkey Sanctuary . At present I can just about pay to keep 1 horse .

01-05-2021 5:57pm

byhookorbycrook wrote: »

Donkeys are social creatures . They bray a lot if they are alone , which is why the donkey sanctuary boards them out as pairs
.

That's a good point. OP, if you're going to keep one donkey, you might as well get a second. They form extremely strong pair-bonds, like horses do. They can become a bit inseparable.

Like horses, they do not limit themselves to their kind. They can befriend a cow, or a sheep, just as easily. But company is very important. Donkeys are very gregarious.

As byhookorbycrook says, make sure you have access to a farrier. It might be hard to get a farrier just to pare your monkey's hooves — farriers are in short supply — so you could ask around a local yard, and have their farrier pop-by when he's doing their horses.

Otherwise, they're low maintenance. Just a few wormings per year, depending on which animals they're sharing a field with.

Strumms · 01-05-2021 6:24pm

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

I love donkeys.

To anyone reading this, if you have any money at all to spare, give it to the Donkey Sanctuary. Donkeys have particularly urgent foot-care needs, because they originate from hardened climates where their feet are naturally worn by their environment, but can over-grow on Irish soil.. The Irish Donkey Sanctuary go all around the country, tending to donkeys' feet.

To the OP, if you have half an acre of grass and the time and temperament for a donkey, you will be richly rewarded.

They are fantastic creatures. Very intelligent. Biblically modest, none of the haughty arrogance of horses. It should come as no surprise that Jesus Christ rode into Jerusalem on the back of the same animal that carried his pregnant mother into Bethlehem. Everybody's life is enriched by having a donkey in it. Nobody in human history has regretted befriending a donkey.

Quite

Gregor Samsa · 01-05-2021 8:32pm

A Tyrant Named Miltiades! wrote: »

It might be hard to get a farrier just to pare your monkey's hooves — farriers are in short supply

I’d say monkey farriers particularly so.

pgj2015 · 01-05-2021 10:24pm

There is a field near me with 2 horses and 1 donkey. any time I pass, the donkey is always on his own. the 2 horses are always together. kind of feel sad for the poor donkey.

Capt'n Midnight · 01-05-2021 11:43pm

Pros
Any good donkey will know the way home from the pub at the end of the night.
Way better auto navigation than a Tesla

Cons
https://imgur.com/gallery/Rjld6

Sharpyshoot · 01-05-2021 11:47pm

Either achieve coitus or get coitus.

begbysback · 01-05-2021 11:55pm

pgj2015 wrote: »

There is a field near me with 2 horses and 1 donkey. any time I pass, the donkey is always on his own. the 2 horses are always together. kind of feel sad for the poor donkey.

Could be that he’s being an ass

Sharpyshoot · 01-05-2021 11:56pm

begbysback wrote: »

Could be that he’s being an ass

You have obsession with ass.

silliussoddius · 02-05-2021 1:05am

Pro - you have a donkey
Con - you have a donkey

Strumms · 02-05-2021 1:17am

You can use it to transport tired monkeys, in style.

Canis Lupus · 02-05-2021 2:09am

Gregor Samsa wrote: »

People refer to 3 legged donkeys as a “wonky”, but actually 3 legs is the most efficient and stable arrangement of legs, as per tripods and 3 legged stools. So be sure to get a 3 legged one if you have uneven ground and you don’t want it to wobble.

I think you'll find work health and safety don't think 3 legs is sufficient. Minimum is 5.

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 02-05-2021 3:19am

Canis Lupus wrote: »

I think you'll find work health and safety don't think 3 legs is sufficient. Minimum is 5.

How about he buys a werewolf then?

fryup · 02-05-2021 1:18pm

there is no NCT for donkeys, well not that i know of

Princess Consuela Bananahammock · 02-05-2021 1:32pm

fryup wrote: »

there is no NCT for donkeys, well not that i know of

Nutrituional Carrot Take?

gogo · 02-05-2021 1:36pm

Pro: You’ll get to correct everyone when they call it a dunkey instead of a donkey ... thus leading to vast airs of superiority

BENDYBINN · 02-05-2021 1:43pm

Cheap transportation

Donkey ****t everywhere...

fryup · 02-05-2021 2:17pm

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Can you help me out with a Pros and Cons list for buying a donkey. What I have o far:

Cons
I'll need to buy a bigger bed

this springs to mind :P

biko · 02-05-2021 2:22pm

byhookorbycrook wrote: »

Donkeys are social creatures . They bray a lot if they are alone

Ah, that is how Bray got its name...

the_pen_turner · 02-05-2021 3:20pm

BENDYBINN wrote: »

Cheap transportation

Donkey ****t everywhere...

donkeys generally ***t in a couple of places and not everywhere. they are fairly clean animals

Capt'n Midnight · 02-05-2021 3:30pm

fryup wrote: »

there is no NCT for donkeys, well not that i know of

Technically it's the NDT.

The Pros and Cons of buying a Donkey

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