Crappy presents - Candles

DulchieLaois · 27-12-2019 2:46pm #1

After another season of eating loads, drinking anything, I reflect on the presents that my wife has received.

Over the last few years, my poor wife must have received candles from her friends and my family and tbh, I am sick of this just another candle which we are sure that it’s a pass me on candle from somebody else and yet we invest time and money into their presents.

I think going forward, no more present shopping for everyone is the best solution.

What are people thoughts on this.

punisher5112 · 27-12-2019 2:47pm

DulchieLaois wrote: »

After another season of eating loads, drinking anything, I reflect on the presents that my wife has received.

Over the last few years, my poor wife must have received candles from her friends and my family and tbh, I am sick of this just another candle which we are sure that it’s a pass me on candle from somebody else and yet we invest time and money into their presents.

I think going forward, no more present shopping for everyone is the best solution.

What are people thoughts on this.

Wife can't get enough of the Yankee candles

Posy · 27-12-2019 2:50pm

I think it depends if you like candles or not, to be fair! Plenty of people love candles.

If she doesn't like candles, she should tell those who buy her presents that she's beginning to get tired of receiving so many.

Surely it's the thought that counts anyway, no? :pac:

Loughc · 27-12-2019 2:56pm

I love candles. Since we got a dog we live for smelly candles to neutralise the smell of dog in the house. They’re so cosy and certain Yankee candle smells remind me of Christmas.

Posy · 27-12-2019 3:04pm

Yankee candles aren't cheap either, I think they're a lovely gift.

yerwanthere123 · 27-12-2019 3:06pm

Be grateful for what you get.

punisher5112 · 27-12-2019 3:07pm

If she didn't get anything she would moan, she gets something she moans then it spills over to the fella and he moans..... It's a moany cycle.

Postgrad10 · 27-12-2019 3:08pm

We went through a stage of that, member of the family being a teacher. Haven’t received any in a while and we seem to have got through them during various storms/ power outages. You never know when they’ll come in handy.

Purgative · 27-12-2019 3:16pm

DulchieLaois wrote: »

After another season of eating loads, drinking anything, I reflect on the presents that my wife has received.

Over the last few years, my poor wife must have received candles from her friends and my family and tbh, I am sick of this just another candle which we are sure that it’s a pass me on candle from somebody else and yet we invest time and money into their presents.

Does your wife like candles? Has she complained?

I think going forward, no more present shopping for everyone is the best solution.

That's what we do. We just buy for the kids.

Lets face it we live in the affluent first world, if any adult really wants or needs something, they go and get it.

Think though come the next power outage you'll both have the last laugh.

Space Dog · 27-12-2019 10:07pm

Reminds me of this SNL skit...

https://youtu.be/_L5Xkb78KxY

Day Lewin · 28-12-2019 12:27am

I love candles. They make the house look homey, bright and festive.
Welcoming and warm.

They will always get used - and many of them have a nice smell added. Bring them on!

That being said, I went through a spell when the choir I was in always used to have Kriskindels and mine was always a candle.
I eventually expressed that it felt a little bit desperate and impersonal to get this stream of candles, - as if nobody knew who I was!
-- and the very next Christmas, my present was a tiny picture frame with a teeny photo of me in it, cut from a group photo.
I was charmed to the hilt! So kind. I still have it.

Always Tired · 28-12-2019 12:29am

I have one sister I don't like and I get her a candle every year. Not a good one either this year it was from the 2 euro shop and it wasnt even 2 euro it was 1.50

endacl · 28-12-2019 12:44am

Day Lewin wrote: »

I eventually expressed that it felt a little bit desperate and impersonal to get this stream of candles, - as if nobody knew who I was!
-- and the very next Christmas, my present was a tiny picture frame with a teeny photo of me in it, cut from a group photo.
I was charmed to the hilt! So kind. I still have it.

Ever been stuck for a tiny picture of yourself during a power cut?

screamer · 28-12-2019 12:57am

This is exactly why the adults in my family and in laws don’t do presents. So many people buy something for the sake of it, and it’s not needed nor appreciated by the recipient. We just say don’t waste your money buying me something I don’t want or need and I’ll do the same. We give s house pack instead biccies choccies wine whiskey and gift cards for the kids.

Postgrad10 · 28-12-2019 2:34am

Always Tired wrote: »

I have one sister I don't like and I get her a candle every year. Not a good one either this year it was from the 2 euro shop and it wasnt even 2 euro it was 1.50

Fair enough. It’s the thought that counts ( wink emoji).

Grab All Association · 28-12-2019 2:38am

You think nothing can top candles but this is a good one. A cousin of mine received a framed Padre Pio picture for Christmas last year from her boyfriend.

28-12-2019 2:42am

Always Tired wrote: »

I have one sister I don't like and I get her a candle every year. Not a good one either this year it was from the 2 euro shop and it wasnt even 2 euro it was 1.50

Top marks. That’s even better than giving her nothing. You made an effort to show how thoughtless the gift was. Classic.

28-12-2019 2:44am

Grab All Association wrote: »

You think nothing can top candles but this is a good one. A cousin of mine received a framed Padre Pio picture for Christmas last year from her boyfriend.

Epic.

Genuinely laughed out loud.

worded · 28-12-2019 2:47am

Dangerous for asthma sufferers, I personally detest them

https://www.asthma.ie/news/%E2%80%9C12-days-asthma%E2%80%9D-will-help-you-avoid-your-asthma-triggers-christmas-asthma-society

https://www.google.ie/amp/s/www.independent.co.uk/life-style/scented-candles-health-danger-environment-air-pollution-chemicals-a8732436.html%3famp

Graces7 · 28-12-2019 8:49am

Love candles but cannot afford them; please send them here! I mean that. I have the stub end of one left.

All of this is part of the reason we ( family and friends) do not give cards and gifts but send cash to a charity instead.. and give our time to each other at these times, in whatever way we can.

OP give your candles to a charity shop ? They will sell well; or pm me for my address!

Cannot believe folk quibble like this.

Graces7 · 28-12-2019 8:50am

Grab All Association wrote: »

You think nothing can top candles but this is a good one. A cousin of mine received a framed Padre Pio picture for Christmas last year from her boyfriend.

and ???

Aceandstuff · 28-12-2019 9:34am

I ended up getting a candle and a Frozen mug in a "Secret Santa" stealing game. Nobody wanted to steal them from me, and I already have millions of candles and mugs, so I regifted them. The neighbours' 4 year old granddaughter got the mug, and a friend I managed to meet up with in a train station for ten minutes on our ways home got the fancy candle. Job done. Neither of them were expecting a present from me, and I managed to offload the things I didn't want. (I was completely honest about where the candle came from, and it was an unplanned gift. My friend gave me a fancy designer jar of coffee because that's what you feed programmers.)

There's no use in complaining about these things unless there is a massive imbalance in the types of gifts exchanged, so what does your wife give these friends in return, OP?

Heroditas · 28-12-2019 11:26am

Loughc wrote: »

I love candles. Since we got a dog we live for smelly candles to neutralise the smell of dog in the house. They’re so cosy and certain Yankee candle smells remind me of Christmas.

You need to get yourself a White Company Winter Signature Candle.

Graces7 · 29-12-2019 3:21pm

I , as we planned, did not get any gifts... oh the island community association gifted all us old ones a tub of Roses... One of my cats got a wonderful Secret Santa gift! Very appreciated by all six cats...

There are no words for folk complaining about what they are given. Or for using words to refer to gifts such as is done here.

New Home · 29-12-2019 9:47pm

Personally, I love candles. But it depends on the scent. I've a gorgeous soy-based frankincense one that smells heavenly.

Some of these, however...

Loughc · 29-12-2019 11:25pm

Currently have a candle my sister got me as a present lighting. Smells Devine. Great gift

29-12-2019 11:26pm

Candles aren't the worse to receive, but to gift a daycent one...too expensive.

r3nu4l · 29-12-2019 11:27pm

The problem with candles is that scent is subjective. One person's 'spring meadow', is another's 'wet dog'.

My wife absolutely detests the "Christmas" scents, so you can imagine how she feels when she sees a red Yankee candle box...

You have to really know someone before buying them a scented candle!

Melania Frump · 29-12-2019 11:29pm

r3nu4l wrote: »

The problem with candles is that scent is subjective. One person's 'spring meadow', is another's 'wet dog'.

My wife absolutely detests the "Christmas" scents, so you can imagine how she feels when she sees a red Yankee candle box...

You have to really know someone before buying them a scented candle!

Yeah but everyone loves the fresh cotton one.

Loughc · 29-12-2019 11:38pm

Fair point on last two posts.

New Home · 29-12-2019 11:45pm

So, to paraphrase...

"Candles?!? BURN THEM WITH FIRE!!!"

........I'll get my coat.............

freshpopcorn · 29-12-2019 11:46pm

In theory I like candles but in reality as a guy I find it hard to get one's I like the scent of.
I remember Aldi did them a few years ago but I haven't seen anything really since that.

r3nu4l · 29-12-2019 11:47pm

Melania Frump wrote: »

Yeah but everyone loves the fresh cotton one.

You say that but nope. Not for me. I like lemon, grapefruit, melon scents.

EXIT: I also love the Christmas scents but whenever we get one, it gets regifted...

Melania Frump · 29-12-2019 11:48pm

freshpopcorn wrote: »

In theory I like candles but in reality as a guy I find it hard to get one's I like the scent of.
I remember Aldi did them a few years ago but I haven't seen anything really since that.

A guy!

Dont know why I thought you were female and no offence intended.

Maybe lime basil and mandarin? Nice musky guy scent.

New Home · 29-12-2019 11:48pm

freshpopcorn wrote: »

In theory I like candles but in reality as a guy I find it hard to get one's I like the scent of.
I remember Aldi did them a few years ago but I haven't seen anything really since that.

My brother loves this.

https://www.erbolario.com/en/ginepro-nero/perfumed-candle-black-juniper-3055.html

Loughc · 29-12-2019 11:55pm

r3nu4l wrote: »

EXIT: I also love the Christmas scents but whenever we get one, it gets regifted...

I will happily take the Christmas scent regifted ones :P

freshpopcorn · 30-12-2019 12:00am

Melania Frump wrote: »

A guy!

Dont know why I thought you were female and no offence intended.

Maybe lime basil and mandarin? Nice musky guy scent.

Yes, I'm male. I watch soaps and like Christmas.

Musky one's can be okay.

JupiterKid · 30-12-2019 12:01am

I love candles, and scented candles, especially cinnamon, jasmine, lavender or pomegrante can all so much atmosphere and warmth to a room.

That said, the specific scent is subjective and may not be to everybody's taste.

I have only ever received candles an an Xmas gift a couple of times, and was very grateful to get them.

OP - if you don't want family/friends to gift you or your wife candles, just say so.

Personally, I would be pleased to get anything from anyone.

TheRiverman · 30-12-2019 12:11am

Always Tired wrote: »

I have one sister I don't like and I get her a candle every year. Not a good one either this year it was from the 2 euro shop and it wasnt even 2 euro it was 1.50

Strange that a person would go on an internet discussion board and post something that should be a private family matter.

Melania Frump · 30-12-2019 12:11am

freshpopcorn wrote: »

Yes, I'm male. I watch soaps and like Christmas.

Musky one's can be okay.

I havent seen your posts but I usually make assumptions from usernames.

Again seriously didnt mean to offend

jellybear · 30-12-2019 12:19am

Melania Frump wrote: »

Maybe lime basil and mandarin? Nice musky guy scent.

https://celticcandles.ie/large-pop-jars/222-large-pop-jar-lime-basil-and-manderin.html

My favourite candle!!

Saltwater Shores is also lovely....
https://www.tipperarycrystal.ie/products/saltwater-shores-filled-tumbler-glass

I also don't like 'Fresh Cotton' at all.

Candles are a tricky gift. Unless I've seen a particular one lit in someone's house or have seen a diffuser of it, I don't buy them for people.

u140acro3xs7dm · 30-12-2019 12:26am

Graces7 wrote: »

Love candles but cannot afford them; please send them here! I mean that. I have the stub end of one left.

All of this is part of the reason we ( family and friends) do not give cards and gifts but send cash to a charity instead.. and give our time to each other at these times, in whatever way we can.

OP give your candles to a charity shop ? They will sell well; or pm me for my address!

Cannot believe folk quibble like this.

I'll post it tomorrow

Is your address as below?

Graces7
The Island
Ireland

Postgrad10 · 30-12-2019 1:57pm

One of my relatives and I had a chat about the candle thing before the candles it was a craze of bags of pot porri!!

New Home · 30-12-2019 1:58pm

Postgrad10 wrote: »

One of my relatives and I had a chat about the candle thing before the candles it was a craze of bags of pot porri!!

Ah, yesss, I remember it well... "These crisps taste awful!" :rolleyes:;):D

Postgrad10 · 30-12-2019 2:05pm

New Home wrote: »

Ah, yesss, I remember it well... "These crisps taste awful!" :rolleyes:;):D

Just had a rummage through the cupboards and found a strawberry scented bag!!!

New Home · 30-12-2019 2:07pm

I loved the peach scented ones. And some of the flowery Avon ones.

KWAG2019 · 30-12-2019 2:07pm

OP is rightly peed off at investing time and money into others presents and getting thoughtless crap back. It’s an imbalance in the relationship: you feel obliged to put thought into it and they don’t give a s**t.

My solution: look at other ways you’re expected to play second fiddle and stop doing that. People will quickly tune into the fact that you’re thinking more of yourself. And that’s the key. Think more of yourself.

When it’s next Xmas tell everyone that you’re giving vouchers and you only want vouchers. That leaves you free to buy what suits you. Tell them plainly that candles will be donated to charity. If you want to make it pointed praise the idea of the pro cathedral and unwanted presents.

Your new year resolutions OP.

begbysback · 30-12-2019 2:07pm

punisher5112 wrote: »

Wife can't get enough of the Yankee candles

I used to like them but you get black stuff up your nostrils from them

New Home · 30-12-2019 2:15pm

KWAG2019 wrote: »

OP is rightly peed off at investing time and money into others presents and getting thoughtless crap back.

When it’s next Xmas tell everyone that you’re giving vouchers and you only want vouchers. That leaves you free to buy what suits you. Tell them plainly that candles will be donated to charity. If you want to make it pointed praise the idea of the pro cathedral and unwanted presents.

Your new year resolutions OP.

That, to me, sounds like being ungrateful, to be honest. Irrespective of what it is, even if it's just a card or a text, I'm grateful to receive it, because it usually (usually, not always) shows that someone was thinking about me. Also, you don't really know other people's means, and asking for vouchers could put them under strain. And before you say candles are expensive, for all I know they might have got them in a charity shop.

begbysback wrote: »

I used to like them but you get black stuff up your nostrils from them

You do know you're not supposed to smoke them, right? :pac:

Loughc · 30-12-2019 2:18pm

begbysback wrote: »

I used to like them but you get black stuff up your nostrils from them

Most likely from a high flame. Trim the wick regularly and no black stuff up the nose

KWAG2019 · 30-12-2019 2:19pm

New Home wrote: »

That, to me, sounds like being ungrateful, to be honest. Irrespective of what it is, even if it's just a card or a text, I'm grateful to receive it, because it usually (usually, not always) shows that someone was thinking about me. Also, you don't really know other people's means, and asking for vouchers could put them under strain. And before you say candles are expensive, for all I know they might have got them in a charity shop.

You do know you're not supposed to smoke them, right? :pac:

That to me sounds like continuing exactly in the frame of mind the OP was complaining about.

Crappy presents - Candles

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