Sinead O'Connor missing(Mod warning in op)

AtomicHorror · 16-05-2016 07:17PM

itac wrote: »

If someone fractured the bones in their hand as a kid and it healed in such a way that it refused to work properly sometimes 20/30/40 yrs later, would you tell them to stop using it as an excuse for dropping something from their grip at times? Health issues are health issues, mental or physical.

Very nicely put.

genericguy · 16-05-2016 07:17PM

Spanish Eyes wrote: »

Despite the popularity and wonderful nature of Social Media these days, does anyone ever think that it can be very detrimental to those who may not think (or be capable of rational thought), before ranting and posting?

I dunno.

We aren't banning the Internet to save a few sensitive souls. Don't even start.

RayM · 16-05-2016 07:18PM

smash wrote: »

That's bullshít Ray and you know it.

I'm sorry, but it isn't. There are a lot of people on the internet who seem to get a real kick out of showing everyone how unsympathetic they are, as though showing that you're capable of empathy is somehow a weakness.

smash · 16-05-2016 07:18PM

itac wrote: »

If someone fractured the bones in their hand as a kid and it healed in such a way that it refused to work properly sometimes 20/30/40 yrs later, would you tell them to stop using it as an excuse for dropping something from their grip at times? Health issues are health issues, mental or physical.

Let's not get in to silly comparisons between dropping something every now and then and taking actions that completely destroy people's lives. In doing so, you're underplaying the affects of mental health issues.

Lurkio · 16-05-2016 07:19PM

Bambi wrote: »

I would have thought the USA is the last place she'd want to go considering that

Well it wouldn't be the rational choice, but therein lies the nub of the matter.

genericguy · 16-05-2016 07:19PM

Sydney Mango Lump wrote: »

Has it been seven hours and fifteen days since she took herself away?.

That was the duration of her marriage iirc

harr · 16-05-2016 07:21PM

She is very troubled...have a read over her Facebook posts over the last few months...it's obvious she is very unstable...she has made references to taking her own life on a number of posts and it's not the firt time police have gone looking for her...the last time she was placed in a psychiatric unit here in Dublin ...I think that was the second time in a matter of months she was sectioned.
Not very popular in the states at moment because of her comments after the death of prince

smash · 16-05-2016 07:21PM

RayM wrote: »

I'm sorry, but it isn't. There are a lot of people on the internet who seem to get a real kick out of showing everyone how unsympathetic they are, as though showing that you're capable of empathy is somehow a weakness.

If you're talking about people on the internet then fine, it's how you feel and I'm not going to argue it because it is in fact true. But your post was directed at me, not people on the Internet and in this case it was bullshít as its not what I'm like.

AtomicHorror · 16-05-2016 07:21PM

smash wrote: »

Let's not get in to silly comparisons between dropping something every now and then and taking actions that completely destroy people's lives. In doing so, you're underplaying the affects of mental health issues.

We're talking about her going missing, which is something that could very reasonably be attributed to her known mental health issues. If you want to talk about some other destructive acts that you feel are wrongly attributed to mental health, is that really relevant here?

Wibbs · 16-05-2016 07:22PM

smash wrote: »

In doing so, you're underplaying the affects of mental health issues.

There's also the highly variable aspect of the range of conditions involved and how they affect the person and those around them. There's a huge difference between lifetime recurring severe depression and say a sudden phobia brought on by a single traumatic event, both on success or no of treatments and the effects on the person and loved ones.

16-05-2016 07:27PM

I can kind of see where Smash is coming from. I think.

I have nothing but compassion for Sinead. Mental illness is an often unpredictable and always lonely and painful experience. I know this myself. But. There is I think a tendency to tip toe around the subject for fear of triggering or offending anyone. Sometimes some people need a different approach. Sometimes constant "oh that is so awful" isn't very helpful. Depending on the individual such platitudes can reinforce a sense of being a victim.

Now I am absolutely not saying this is the case with every person who is in pain and I can't emphasis enough that I fully empathise. It's just sometimes that empathy can be shown in different ways.

santana75 · 16-05-2016 07:30PM

Autonomous Cowherd wrote: »

I hope you never have a mental illness, truly i do, as I do not think you would be capable of bearing it. It can be the most horrific experience imaginable - like being imprisoned and suffocated every minute of every day - and it takes insane strength and bravery to navigate through it. Only the truly strong get through it.

These kind of posts always leave me feeling uneasy. Theres just too much victim going on there, and not enough personal power. Things happen in peoples lives, like they grow up in abusive homes, theres sexual abuse, drug use, alcoholism etc. And these things have a profound effect on people as they grow up. But at some point you have to make a choice, you can deal with it and take responsibility for your own happiness or you can play the victim and allow it to consume you and pull you down a dark hole. Its not about being truly strong. That makes it sound like some sort of special gift bestowed only on the lucky few. Its a choice, you make it every day, in every situation. Everyone can overcome their past and be a healthy human being, but you have to make that a choice and not play the victim.

smash · 16-05-2016 07:31PM

The most frustrating thing about this thread is that this type of behaviour is not unusual for Sinead O'Connor any yet there's so much of this "aw bless her" kind of attitude. I'm going to call a spade a spade and not walk on eggshells; the girl is actually certifiable and has been for quite some time and from what I can gather, she has pushed everyone away and refused to accept any form of help. That in itself is very sad but it's also extremely selfish. Her actions are not just affecting her, they are destroying the lives of a lot of people and because of this she should not be wrapped in cotton wool!

AtomicHorror · 16-05-2016 07:32PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I can kind of see where Smash is coming from. I think.

I have nothing but compassion for Sinead. Mental illness is an often unpredictable and always lonely and painful experience. I know this myself. But. There is I think a tendency to tip toe around the subject for fear of triggering or offending anyone. Sometimes some people need a different approach. Sometimes constant "oh that is so awful" isn't very helpful. Depending on the individual such platitudes can reinforce a sense of being a victim.

Now I am absolutely not saying this is the case with every person who is in pain and I can't emphasis enough that I fully empathise. It's just sometimes that empathy can be shown in different ways.

Sure, but when the topic is a known mentally ill person exhibiting behaviour classically associated with mental illness, is this the place for that discussion?

If this thread were about her public comments about Prince, for example, then I think I'd see the point.

The Backwards Man · 16-05-2016 07:33PM

I wouldn't have a lot of time for her myself, but some of ye could give her masterclasses on 'attention seeking', as ye put it.

AtomicHorror · 16-05-2016 07:34PM

santana75 wrote: »

These kind of posts always leave me feeling uneasy. Theres just too much victim going on there, and not enough personal power.

Isn't one of the key symptoms of mental health that it undermines agency?

Might as well complain that we're too tolerant of asthmatics wheezing sometimes after exercise.

itac · 16-05-2016 07:35PM

smash wrote: »

Let's not get in to silly comparisons between dropping something every now and then and taking actions that completely destroy people's lives. In doing so, you're underplaying the affects of mental health issues.

No, what I was trying to say is that at some point in a persons life, be it at birth/childhood/teen years/adulthood, something in someone's brain can start to work very differently than how it started. This can manifest in sporadic/permanent mental health issues.

FortySeven · 16-05-2016 07:36PM

smash wrote: »

No. Sorry but everywhere you go there's all this "we need to talk about mental health" and "it needs to be an open platform" but it appears you can only talk about it if you walk on egg shells and have nothing bad to say.

Absolute codswallop. Mature, open discussion is the only way forward in mental health. Softly, softly is not something that works with people who regularly spend time in places unimaginable to most. Prisons, police cells, mental hospitals, addiction clinics, drug dens and shop doorways are where a lot of people with mental health issues turn up.

Hardy beasts us mental folks. We don't need the kid gloves. Sure, depression may need a bit more decorum and sensitivity but that is usually a condition that if left untreated leads to small inconveniences like death. I think most would agree kid gloves are a requirement here.

Personally, everyone knows I'm bipolar. People rip the piss at work and I take it on the chin because I KNOW I'm mental. There was a long time before I got treatment that I didn't.

That's when the problems occur. I once came to my senses having spent 2 weeks buying and refurbishing vacuum cleaners. God knows why but I had 15 of them in my tiny flat. All looking brand new but we're at least ten years old. I had no idea why.

That's the madness. Try explaining that to people. Does mental health excuse it? I hope so, because otherwise how do I explain the madness? Fetish?

Perhaps Sinead is out collecting dysons right now, perhaps she is dead in a ditch. Who knows?

I can tell you this much. It's not fun she is having.

16-05-2016 07:36PM

santana75 wrote: »

Everyone can overcome their past and be a healthy human being, but you have to make that a choice and not play the victim.

Indeed but what often happens is people try and battle every day to leave their past behind but they just can't. Or they do a good job of managing but sometimes old experiences and hurts are ready to jump out at them.

Wanderer78 · 16-05-2016 07:36PM

hope shes found soon. dreadful time for her family and friends

Lurkio · 16-05-2016 07:39PM

santana75 wrote: »

These kind of posts always leave me feeling uneasy. Theres just too much victim going on there, and not enough personal power. Things happen in peoples lives, like they grow up in abusive homes, theres sexual abuse, drug use, alcoholism etc. And these things have a profound effect on people as they grow up. But at some point you have to make a choice, you can deal with it and take responsibility for your own happiness or you can play the victim and allow it to consume you and pull you down a dark hole. Its not about being truly strong. That makes it sound like some sort of special gift bestowed only on the lucky few. Its a choice, you make it every day, in every situation. Everyone can overcome their past and be a healthy human being, but you have to make that a choice and not play the victim.

That's somebody who is traumatised. Ms O'Connors problem is her perception of reality not her past, a great deal of which would objectively not have been as she remembers it, to an extent far beyond the norm. Her condition is treatable but not curable.

Jimbob1977 · 16-05-2016 07:41PM

The search will be tricky.

Wilmette is near the shore of Lake Michigan and is surrounded by woods and bike trails.

Very picturesque area... think Home Alone or Ferris Builder's Day Off (nearby Winnetka).

Best wishes to her

Spanish Eyes · 16-05-2016 07:42PM

genericguy wrote: »

We aren't banning the Internet to save a few sensitive souls. Don't even start.

Of course not, and you are right.

Just sometimes I think the portals of the internet especially FB and the like can unleash things that one wouldn't say face to face. Not in a good way, I mean.

There are so many posts on the net about relationships and so on where FB is the catalyst for discovery of infidelity or stalking or whatever nowadays. It can be just so open for everyone to see.

Privacy is precious too.

RayM · 16-05-2016 07:45PM

smash wrote: »

If you're talking about people on the internet then fine, it's how you feel and I'm not going to argue it because it is in fact true. But your post was directed at me, not people on the Internet and in this case it was bullshít as its not what I'm like.

Sorry to break it to you, but that's how your posts are coming across.

smash · 16-05-2016 07:46PM

AtomicHorror wrote: »

Are we currently discussing behaviours not generally associated with mental illness?

If not, is there a thread you'd like to start about something inexcusable Sinead O'Connor has done?

I was actually going to post about it in a previous thread about her but the thread was locked or moved to the celebrity forum. I can't remember which.

FortySeven · 16-05-2016 07:47PM

santana75 wrote: »

These kind of posts always leave me feeling uneasy. Theres just too much victim going on there, and not enough personal power. Things happen in peoples lives, like they grow up in abusive homes, theres sexual abuse, drug use, alcoholism etc. And these things have a profound effect on people as they grow up. But at some point you have to make a choice, you can deal with it and take responsibility for your own happiness or you can play the victim and allow it to consume you and pull you down a dark hole. Its not about being truly strong. That makes it sound like some sort of special gift bestowed only on the lucky few. Its a choice, you make it every day, in every situation. Everyone can overcome their past and be a healthy human being, but you have to make that a choice and not play the victim.

There is so much wrong with this it is incredible. Depression is not the only mental health condition. Schizophrenia, bulemia, bipolar, adhd, personality disorder etc, etc are all conditions that can affect anyone.

Depression itself is not some pity pot, attention seeking affliction. It affects people who have great lives, everything they dreamed of.

Then they kill themselves. Trivializing this condition is easy but I think most in society have come to accept that this is not just something you can 'man up' from.

Spanish Eyes · 16-05-2016 07:48PM

Deleted User wrote: »

How do you mean? What is "normal"?

Well it is not being SOC anyway. Her difficulties are not normal by any stretch.

I wish her well, she is not alone in dealing with issues like she is.

The sad thing is, there are thousands out there struggling with similar issues, and some may be missing too.

Just because she is a singer, so what in relation to everyone else with mental health issues? Must p!ss those "ordinary" people off. If they had the strength to care sometimes I suppose. Sadly.

IF they think no one cares or cannot get by, And then they see all this stuff about SOC and think, WTF, I am struggling too.

Just a thought.

AtomicHorror · 16-05-2016 07:50PM

smash wrote: »

I was actually going to post about it in a previous thread about her but the thread was locked or moved to the celebrity forum. I can't remember which.

I don't think that makes this the place to start off about people (ab)using mental illness as "an excuse".

Autonomous Cowherd · 16-05-2016 07:51PM

santana75 wrote: »

These kind of posts always leave me feeling uneasy. Theres just too much victim going on there, and not enough personal power. Things happen in peoples lives, like they grow up in abusive homes, theres sexual abuse, drug use, alcoholism etc. And these things have a profound effect on people as they grow up. But at some point you have to make a choice, you can deal with it and take responsibility for your own happiness or you can play the victim and allow it to consume you and pull you down a dark hole. Its not about being truly strong. That makes it sound like some sort of special gift bestowed only on the lucky few. Its a choice, you make it every day, in every situation. Everyone can overcome their past and be a healthy human being, but you have to make that a choice and not play the victim.

Choice is an interesting word. I did not experience depression. I experienced sudden prolonged PTSD - straight out of a clear blue sky. The absolute absence of choice was the most salient thing. I got through it with no medication, so i was taking plenty of responsibility for myself and not ''playing'' the victim. It was grim. But it makes you strong. And it gives one a feeling of infinite compassion for people like Sinéad who for reasons not of their choosing may experience the most awful states in their psyches. Whatever she has done to hurt others is not of her choosing. Being in whatever mental condition she is in is not of her choosing. Like every other human being on earth, she desires happiness and the absence of suffering above all.

santana75 · 16-05-2016 07:51PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Indeed but what often happens is people try and battle every day to leave their past behind but they just can't. Or they do a good job of managing but sometimes old experiences and hurts are ready to jump out at them.

But thats what I meant when I said, to deal with it. Not ignoring what happened or trying to just forget about it. To face it head on, process the emotions and then let it go. I understand the concept of being hijacked emotionally, but this is something you get to make a choice about every time. You can allow it to take you over and be a victim, or you can be aware in the moment and decide to respond differently. That and facing up to the emotions. This is taking responsibility for yourself and how you interpret the world, not playing the victim and acting like its all being done to you or you have some sort of disease.

Sinead O'Connor missing(Mod warning in op)

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