Do Atheists have different funerals to religious people?

ThatGeekGirl · 31-03-2016 01:44AM

feargale wrote: »

True, Limbo and all that, but I never heard of a baby going to hell. Did they not close down Limbo?

No idea what the status on limbo is but that is a bit of a cop out to say "but I never heard of a baby going to hell". For a lot of Catholics (I would argue all but that is debatable) the point is to get into heaven, not to escape going to hell. To tell a grieving mother her baby is not going to heaven - where ever the church states the baby will end up - is a terrible thing to say. I don't even believe in the catholic religion and I would still think that is a horrendous thing for an organised religion to say to it's believers.

feargale · 31-03-2016 01:44AM

LuckyDude12 wrote: »

So many sadacts here talking about the prospect of having your funeral non religious, it's going to be a massive regret!

Would it be ok if they do their own thing, Dude? Like if you were the Supremo in Ireland would you ban non-religious funerals?

murpho999 · 31-03-2016 01:45AM

wokingvoter wrote: »

You might find it bizarre, and your entitled to that, as I am entitled to find equally bizarre your head scratching over how bereaved people glean comfort from their faith.
In this case this huge extended family have great faith in God. Maybe not each individual family member, but they would be fairly observant Catholics.

As I have said before I actually think it's the coming together of people that, through religion, that provides the support and not really the religion.

I just can't understand how people can be thankful to a God that allows a 5 year old to die.

[QUOTE=wokingvoter;9923
3217]Some greater minds then yours and mine, some very clever people, scientists and doctors and philosophers, have really thought about it and come to the conclusion that God is real. I wouldn't consider them to be "blindly following " would you?
Even if people are "blindly following " why do you want to take that comfort away from them?[/QUOTE]

I think you're getting desperate now. Plenty of Athiest doctors, scientists and philosopher out there so you're not proving anything.

wokingvoter · 31-03-2016 01:48AM

murpho999 wrote: »

As I have said before I actually think it's the coming together of people that, through religion, that provides the support and not really the religion.

I just can't understand how people can be thankful to a God that allows a 5 year old to die.

I think you're getting desperate now. Plenty of Athiest doctors, scientists an philsophers out there so you're not proving anything.

Im not desperate about anything.I'm aware of course that there are many Atheist doctors etc just pointing out that there are many of faith too.
If you can't understand how people remain thankful to God despite terrible tragedy then you don't understand, That's it. It's one of those things.
I don't understand the obsession with reality TV
I don't feel an overwhelming need to tell those who love it how misguided they are
I just accept that I don't get it and I get on with my own thing

Lyaiera · 31-03-2016 02:00AM

wokingvoter wrote: »

How miserably unhappy do you need to be to want to go and suggest to the heartbroken bereaved mother of a dead 5 year old that her precious child is roaring in hell?

I didn't suggest it to a heartbroken bereaved mother of a dead 5 year old. I suggested it to someone using that mother's dead child as a debating point on a forum.

And God is not "supposedly " a being that we can't imagine ? Where did you get that idea?

I thought the whole point was that God moves in mysterious ways. And is superior to us. And we can't know how he works.

If you think someone can be saved and go to heaven, you also have to think they can be damned and go to hell. The decision isn't yours, it's gods.

Lyaiera · 31-03-2016 02:02AM

feargale wrote: »

True, Limbo and all that, but I never heard of a baby going to hell. Did they not close down Limbo?

And limbo is just like hell. Never knowing God. Never being near him. Oh the pain to suffer knowing you could be close to your saviour but you will have to spend an eternity being denied his love.

feargale · 31-03-2016 02:04AM

Lyaiera wrote: »

And limbo is just like hell. Never knowing God. Never being near him. Oh the pain to suffer knowing you could be close to your saviour but you will have to spend an eternity being denied his love.

Exactly how much pain would it cause you, Lyaiera?

Mark Tapley · 31-03-2016 02:05AM

wokingvoter wrote: »

Im not desperate about anything.I'm aware of course that there are many Atheist doctors etc just pointing out that there are many of faith too.
If you can't understand how people remain thankful to God despite terrible tragedy then you don't understand, That's it. It's one of those things.
I don't understand the obsession with reality TV
I don't feel an overwhelming need to tell those who love it how misguided they are
I just accept that I don't get it and I get on with my own thing

I think in the real world for myself anyway we don't say to people we think they are misguided. Who would disabuse a parent of the idea that their child is in heaven? Nobody I hope. I think most of us were brought up with the same religious schooling so can understand a religious viewpoint. The difference is that we don't all accept the precepts of religious doctrine. To suggest this is a lack of understanding is insulting. It is a rejection of these precepts.

Lyaiera · 31-03-2016 02:08AM

feargale wrote: »

Exactly how much pain would it cause you, Lyaiera?

I can't even begin to imagine how much pain I'd suffer knowing the Christian God is real and I rejected it.

feargale · 31-03-2016 02:09AM

pgj2015 wrote: »

I was baptized catholic but do not believe in god, and never go to mass, if I get married it will not be in a church, If I have kids they won't be baptized. also I don't want a priest talking at my funeral so can you bypass the whole church funeral bit most people seem to go through?

Do I detect another thread, started with an innocent question, about to descend into a polemic that has little to do with OP's original question?

Goodnight.

Mark Tapley · 31-03-2016 02:14AM

feargale wrote: »

Do I detect another thread, started with an innocent question, about to descend into a polemic that has little to do with OP's original question?

Goodnight.

I know it is discouraged on boards to go " off topic" but that is the nature of conversation. Sometimes I would like to see where it leads.

diomed · 31-03-2016 06:52AM

One thing I found a bit different was a modern gravestone with just the first names (let's say Bob and Ann), and no second name.
Why put up a gravestone but remain anonymous?

Coffee Fulled Runner · 31-03-2016 08:56AM

If you are a true atheists, then why would it matter what type of funeral your family would give you as long as they find comfort?

meeeeh · 31-03-2016 09:10AM

Coffee Fulled Runner wrote: »

If you are a true atheists, then why would it matter what type of funeral your family would give you as long as they find comfort?

My mother's parents were atheists and they both had catholic funerals. I don't think granny wanted to deal with alternative arrangements plus I don't think she particularly wanted to listen to speeches of his drinking buddies. Granny kept to herself, all the 'entertainment' for her funeral would be on my mother and my brother and me. Neither of us want to speak in public and I also think catholic funeral was of great solace to my mother.

For myself I don't give a damn about the send off as long as I am cremated.

BizzyC · 31-03-2016 09:23AM

Coffee Fulled Runner wrote: »

If you are a true atheists, then why would it matter what type of funeral your family would give you as long as they find comfort?

Because I'd find it disrespectful to the person to have a ceremony in honour of them that goes against what they believed.

Would it be ok if atheist family members were to bury a devout catholic without any of the religious sacraments?

meeeeh · 31-03-2016 09:30AM

BizzyC wrote: »

Because I'd find it disrespectful to the person to have a ceremony in honour of them that goes against what they believed.

Would it be ok if atheist family members were to bury a devout catholic without any of the religious sacraments?

If they care.

Btw I presume you would care less if you think there is nothing after death than if you thought your relatives are minimising your chances for heaven or whatever.

Duggy747 · 31-03-2016 09:31AM

Just throw me into the brown bin before they're collected, be grand.

BizzyC · 31-03-2016 09:46AM

meeeeh wrote: »

If they care.

Btw I presume you would care less if you think there is nothing after death than if you thought your relatives are minimising your chances for heaven or whatever.

If you're going to do something that the person themselves would have been against doing, what is the point of the funeral?

Some people believe that funerals are for the living, some think it's about celebrating the person who has passed. I believe in the latter.

topper75 · 31-03-2016 10:20AM

pgj2015 wrote: »

... don't fancy giving my body to medial science.

Anterior science is where it's at.

Keane2baMused wrote: »

...

Anyway, a funeral is not strictly a religious ceremony. ...

True. I mean the priest guy only gives out those little breads as horse doovers to whet your appetite for the pub grub. Right?

Baggy Trousers · 31-03-2016 10:22AM

Merrion wrote: »

If you are an atheist why not donate your body to medical science (as I have asked to do) - you're not going to be using it anyway.

Good idea but you still need burial after 2 to 3 college years (depending on when in college year you died).

I am curious though, what do non-atheists use their bodies for after death?

jmayo · 31-03-2016 10:41AM

kneemos wrote: »

You get buried in the Protestant section.

Actually I recall someone on radio saying the relative of an atheist/humanist was supposedly told this by someone in Donegal Co. Council.

bpmurray wrote: »

Why on earth not? If you're willing to donate your organs which are usually only useful while you're young, why not contribute your body to a bunch of med students who will laugh at the size of your willy/use your guts as a skipping rope/some other outlandish invention? After all, whatever they learn from dissecting your body, separating out the blood vessels and nerves and examining the foramena in the bones, will ultimately make them better doctors and facilitate their healthcare skills.

Or have you head taken on the lash by the medical students ala that full of himself doctor guy on embarrassing bodies.

meeeeh · 31-03-2016 11:02AM

BizzyC wrote: »

If you're going to do something that the person themselves would have been against doing, what is the point of the funeral?

Some people believe that funerals are for the living, some think it's about celebrating the person who has passed. I believe in the latter.

I am an atheist, I don't care how I am buried, neither did my grandparents.

Keane2baMused · 31-03-2016 01:42PM

topper75 wrote: »

Anterior science is where it's at.

True. I mean the priest guy only gives out those little breads as horse doovers to whet your appetite for the pub grub. Right?

Funny how you left the rest of my post out.

Confirmation bias?

The Randy Riverbeast · 31-03-2016 01:45PM

Coffee Fulled Runner wrote: »

If you are a true atheists, then why would it matter what type of funeral your family would give you as long as they find comfort?

People are really not understanding what an atheist is. It's a person who doesn't believe in a god or gods, they are still free to believe in anything else. It doesn't have to be Christian or nothing. Atheists have as much in common with each other as theists do.

beach_walker · 31-03-2016 01:47PM

Baggy Trousers wrote: »

I am curious though, what do non-atheists use their bodies for after death?

What? Plenty of religious people are cremated etc. Just so happens that culturally, Ireland is somewhat adverse to the notion of not being buried.

farmchoice · 31-03-2016 02:11PM

beach_walker wrote: »

What? Plenty of religious people are cremated etc. Just so happens that culturally, Ireland is somewhat adverse to the notion of not being buried.

that's about the height of it. i knew a woman who wanted to donate her body to science, her family are distraught about it, not for religious reasons, they are your average Irish lapsed Catholics, its just the idea of her body not being buried. its just the cultural norm.

i'm an atheist and would like a humanist service of some sort when i die. the wife however has made it clear that i can forget about it and if i do drop dead i will get a catholic ceremony because she knows how to organize that and how it works and what with the dead husband and bawling kids doesn't need the hassle of trying to sort out the humanist one.
ill be dead so i really won't care, still you would think she could at least pretend while i'm alive!!

wokingvoter · 31-03-2016 02:11PM

beach_walker wrote: »

What? Plenty of religious people are cremated etc. Just so happens that culturally, Ireland is somewhat adverse to the notion of not being buried.

We have a big graveyard in the town I live in with plenty of room. Cremation would involve a 2 hour drive minimum. Why would the bereaved put themselves to that inconvenience?
I'm sure if there was a crematorium nearer then it would be 50/50
People in cities forget that rural Ireland doesn't have access to services that city dwellers do, and then put it down to quaint old fashioned superstition

pgj2015 · 31-03-2016 02:36PM

farmchoice wrote: »

that's about the height of it. i knew a woman who wanted to donate her body to science, her family are distraught about it, not for religious reasons, they are your average Irish lapsed Catholics, its just the idea of her body not being buried. its just the cultural norm.

i'm an atheist and would like a humanist service of some sort when i die. the wife however has made it clear that i can forget about it and if i do drop dead i will get a catholic ceremony because she knows how to organize that and how it works and what with the dead husband and bawling kids doesn't need the hassle of trying to sort out the humanist one.
ill be dead so i really won't care, still you would think she could at least pretend while i'm alive!!

This would be my worst nightmare, I think it is disrespectful and selfish of your family to give you a catholic funeral when they know you are atheist and have a dislike for organised religion, the reason I would hate to have a catholic funeral is I would prefer people to be like " fair play to him, hes having the funeral he wants and is not conforming to what Irish society feels is appropriate, the last thing I would want to be thought of is another sheep who doesn't have his own mind. also I would want people to have a party, not be crying in a cold church.

mickoneill31 · 31-03-2016 02:42PM

farmchoice wrote: »

i'm an atheist and would like a humanist service of some sort when i die. the wife however has made it clear that i can forget about it and if i do drop dead i will get a catholic ceremony because she knows how to organize that and how it works and what with the dead husband and bawling kids doesn't need the hassle of trying to sort out the humanist one.
ill be dead so i really won't care, still you would think she could at least pretend while i'm alive!!

Can you not make your arrangements before you die? I don't know as I haven't looked into it myself. It's not a cheery topic I'd imagine but if you felt strongly enough about it you could probably arrange the stuff now so if your wife is around after you die she doesn't have to make any arrangements at all and just keep on partying / grieve in peace (delete as applicable).

It's something on my list of things to do but as usual it's something that you hope is far in the future so it's not something anybody would be in a major rush to investigate.

ThatGeekGirl · 31-03-2016 02:47PM

I always wanted a viking burial, you can't legally do that now though can ya?

Do Atheists have different funerals to religious people?

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