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Thinking persons dinner

  • 31-03-2016 12:52am
    #1
    Feisar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,699 ✭✭✭


    Hypothetical situation:

    OMG the zombies have arrived or yer starving or whatever.

    You come across a field with livestock in it.

    How do you capture/kill one to eat?

    You only have the clothes you are standing in. No tools/kit.

    First they came for the socialists...



Comments

  • #2
    gozunda
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,996 ✭✭✭✭gozunda


    Feisar wrote: »
    Hypothetical situation:

    OMG the zombies have arrived or yer starving or whatever.

    You come across a field with livestock in it.

    How do you capture/kill one to eat?

    You only have the clothes you are standing in. No tools/kit.

    COW - hold on to its tail and milk it (done correctly no bucket required!)

    Bull - leave it be!


  • #3
    Feisar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,699 ✭✭✭Feisar


    Not what I was thinking but OK!

    First they came for the socialists...



  • #4
    Esel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,499 ✭✭✭✭Esel


    Feisar wrote: »
    Hypothetical situation:

    OMG the zombies have arrived or yer starving or whatever.

    You come across a field with livestock in it.

    How do you capture/kill one to eat?

    You only have the clothes you are standing in. No tools/kit.
    No tools/kit? How do you eat it exactly? :)

    Not your ornery onager



  • #5
    gozunda
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 18,996 ✭✭✭✭gozunda


    Scenario # 2: Find zombie feasting on livestock already killed - then wait for zombie to leave. Eat remains as required

    Does that turn you into a zombie - oooppps!


  • #6
    Feisar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,699 ✭✭✭Feisar


    Esel wrote: »
    No tools/kit? How do you eat it exactly? :)

    Get a fire going with a bow drill using a boot lace and use a sharp stone to cut pieces of meat?

    First they came for the socialists...



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  • #7
    Feisar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,699 ✭✭✭Feisar


    OK my idea for capturing an animal in this situation is:

    Go to the edges of the field, or the next one.
    Find barbed wire and use two stones to break off a length
    Open the gate to the field with the animals in
    Make a snare in the opening with the wire
    Chase the animals out the gateway
    Hopefully one will be snared

    It was a question posed to me a while back and that's what I came up with.

    First they came for the socialists...



  • #8
    Esel
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,499 ✭✭✭✭Esel


    1. Snares made from barbed wire tend not to close.

    2. Stones make noise, and take time. Sharp stones take longer to make. Paper, rock or scissors?

    3. Gate is locked.

    4. You are wearing slip-on shoes/boots.

    5. Owner is lying in wait.

    6. Dog(s) are barking/biting.


    tl/dr Chase them into a ditch, wait for them to die, eat eyes/ears/nose/lips/other appendages (:eek:). Come back much later when natural scavengers have opened the carcass. Eat the liver if it's still there.

    You know how to make black pudding? :)

    Not your ornery onager



  • #9
    Feisar
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,699 ✭✭✭Feisar


    1. Snares made from barbed wire tend not to close. I know but we aren't talking about a bunny hopping around

    2. Stones make noise, and take time. Sharp stones take longer to make. Paper, rock or scissors? Relevance?

    3. Gate is locked. Break down an opening

    4. You are wearing slip-on shoes/boots. Well I never!

    5. Owner is lying in wait. Say here Chief I'm starving, but I'd but useful to your camp

    6. Dog(s) are barking/biting. Dogs may put on a show but really need to be trained to attack (OK some will but most need to be trained)

    First they came for the socialists...



  • #10
    wolfeye
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 428 ✭✭wolfeye


    You could try this technique :D



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