Do you do things on your own?

Miaireland · 25-01-2016 08:13PM

I enjoy doing things on my own. I much prefer to go to the cinema on my own. I love shopping on my own (bar my Mom), I dread shopping with friends. I eat out on my own. I go on trips on my own. I am often off when all my friends are working so I do my best not to let myseld stop do thinga because I would be on my own.

That_Guy · 25-01-2016 09:28PM

I relish "me" time. Studying social care and out on placement at the moment and I understand more than ever why it's important to switch from everything/everyone and take time to rest the mind.

I've done tons of things by myself though. It took me a long time to realise that it's ok to break away from mates/gf/family and take time for something I'd like to do.

For instance, I would have asked mates to head over to Newcastle on a trip to head to a game vs their team or whatever.

I had always wanted to go and when the constant, "ah no, not bothered" type of stuff kept cropping up, I just booked a flight, match ticket and a hotel for myself.

Ok, it was a bit nerve racking at first but I'm a talkative enough guy and had the chats with a few people at the game and went for pints with them after.

Quite refreshing being your own boss and not having to wait around on anybody.

Been over plenty of times since then and am planning to treat (well, "treat" is a strong word when you follow the shít storm that is Newcastle United) myself to a trip next season after I finish my exams and what not.

I'd have no problem going to the cinema/gigs/events by myself either. No point in missing out on something you like just because nobody else will go with you.

mohawk · 25-01-2016 11:28PM

I enjoy doing certain stuff alone such as walking/running, shopping.

I don't mind my own company but sometimes I wish I could see my friends more often for brunch, cinema. But the older you get the more stuff people got going on in their lives.

I would never go to a gig or go for a night out alone. It would be weird not having anyone to talk to. I like my alone time but I also enjoy a bit of chat.

MilesMorales1 · 26-01-2016 12:06AM

Sure going to a gig or certain things on your own is odd. Last year I paid 80 quid odd to go to Taylor Swift, didn't like to ask anyone to come with so I went on me own, was so awkward and so self conscious I ended up legging it.

worded · 26-01-2016 05:40AM

Went to lots of concerts when I was younger in groups.

How do you go solo to a gig ?

Fair play to you

Figbiscuithead · 26-01-2016 06:40AM

Yes, I do many things alone. Go for walks regularly alone, have a coffee/drink/a spot of lunch during the day alone, cinema alone, moved country alone, trips away alone, travelled alone, always shop alone as I hate messing about shops...

There's things I want to do and I'm not faffing about trying to find someone who wants to go with me and I'd rather do these things alone than not at all. I also work in a very intense job that requires me to talk to people for up 8 solid hours a day and I NEED my own time to switch off from that. I also like my own company and doing things at my own pace.

I don't go out at night alone, have dinner in a busy restaurant at night alone and I'd only go to a gig alone if no one else came (I've done it a few times though) as these are social things to me. The idea of having to wait for someone else to join me to do anything seems very limiting to me - isn't it better to be out and about than sitting on your couch doing nothing?

Graces7 · 26-01-2016 08:29AM

When folk are aghast eg chatting at my market stall, that I live totally alone from choice in a very remote isolated house I say, " Well if you cannot stand your own company. how are you going to cope with people?" When they say, " Aren't you afraid up there alone?" I sat no; it is people who are dangerous, not solitude.." And comfort them by assuring them I have good locks on my door and a loud dog. Solitude is both my choice and my need. I have M.E and being with other folk is the most exhausting thing there is. So I choose the situation where I can stay less stressed and do more for others than just exist. I love people and so enjoy my shopping outings! Chat with folk and revel in that but always knowing I can drive away and be alone in a peaceful place. One of my joys in old age! I choose how i live. And my choice is solitude. Although with five rescue cats and a ditto dog...Had a lovely day out Satruday and am now home alone until next week... Bliss.. me and library books and knitting for summer sales...and boards of course.. I know; it is very different for those of you who are working; time alone is a treasure and a refreshment in an impossibly stressful world.

Katgurl · 26-01-2016 08:56AM

Shopping, walking, gym, any classes, drink while I'm waiting, food in a cafe, cinema if nobody else wants to see the film; yes.

However I prefer having my friends around, not much fun when nobody to laugh with or chat to. Similar to another poster above, it's harder for people to find time out now from families etc.

Tell me how · 26-01-2016 11:53AM

I spend way too much time on my own. Always have. Have holidayed alone, gone to matches alone and so on.
I don't have a problem with it as such but lately I'm more and more aware of this fact.
I've done it for so long that I now struggle to engage with people, find myself agonising over whether they are enjoying the time with me and so on.

it's great being able to enjoy your own company and be able to reflect and form your own opinions about things but when it starts to feel like that it will be that way forever with less and less interaction with people then it's a scary place.

RobertKK · 26-01-2016 12:22PM

MilesMorales1 wrote: »

Sure going to a gig or certain things on your own is odd. Last year I paid 80 quid odd to go to Taylor Swift, didn't like to ask anyone to come with so I went on me own, was so awkward and so self conscious I ended up legging it.

That is a pity, no one would have cared. It was such a good night.

26-01-2016 12:23PM

worded wrote: »

How do you go solo to a gig ?

Not only can I do it - I often prefer to do it. I get quite into the moment in live music and am internally quite annoyed by someone suddenly leaning in to chat about something - or ask who's round it is - or make some comment about the song or the performance - or some member of the audience they just spotted or whatever.

So yea I can be quite isolationist at gigs - and the more intimate the venue or the act itself - the more isolationist I become. Generally now my girlfriends either do not come to gigs with me - or know not to talk to me _at all_ during the songs, only between them. Some of my friends are not as well trained as my girlfriends are and they will do awful things like lean into my ear in the middle of a really intense intimate song and say something like "This is even better than when he performed it at the last gig we were at in 2009!!!".

26-01-2016 12:30PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Some of my friends are not as well trained as my girlfriends

:pac:

scdublin · 26-01-2016 01:12PM

I love going for walks on my own. I watch TV on my own most nights. I prefer shopping alone too. Sometimes you just need to be left alone.

I'm not overly fond of going for food on my own as I like the company, but have done it loads when out shopping etc. When it comes to travelling I'd usually prefer company as it's nice to share these experiences with a friend or family member. Although in saying that, some people I've traveled with take soooo long to get ready to head out even if it's only a stroll/site seeing, so I can definitely see the appeal in going alone and being able to do whatever you want when you want!

FluffyMcCardy · 26-01-2016 01:18PM

I'm on my own now. I envy those of you who can use it for 'me' time all the time. Alone time for me is time to get all the housework up to date. Cleaning, washing all that fun stuff! Yes OK I'm not working now but even a slave gets a break. Once the kids are back from school that ends.

But before all that came about I used to do a lot alone. In fact it's the story of my life. Not even sure why I got married . Oh wait I remember it's because I was lonely as hell and sick of ploughing a lone furrow. It's easy to convince yourself that being solitary is always a good thing. It isn't for most people. Most of us need company at least some of the time . I still like my alone time when I have nothing to do and all day to do it. But that's not today. The laundry awaits.

MilesMorales1 · 26-01-2016 01:18PM

RobertKK wrote: »

That is a pity, no one would have cared. It was such a good night.

I think people would have cared

a big 7ft 2 lad alone at a Taylor Swift concert would have been weird as ****.

Graces7 · 26-01-2016 01:32PM

Here is a question! If you are at a cinema, eating out, at a match, you are surrounded by people even if you are not talking to them/ How about totally completely ALONE? Surely there is a difference? I count my shopping outings a time among people even if I don't chat with anyone. People are there so I am not alone... Alone is up here and even then when I am here on boards i am not really alone. See what I am getting at?

kfallon · 26-01-2016 01:56PM

Graces7 wrote: »

Here is a question! If you are at a cinema, eating out, at a match, you are surrounded by people even if you are not talking to them/ How about totally completely ALONE? Surely there is a difference? I count my shopping outings a time among people even if I don't chat with anyone. People are there so I am not alone... Alone is up here and even then when I am here on boards i am not really alone. See what I am getting at?

The dictionary defines 'Alone' as, and I quote, "a state of being where one could have a **** at the drop of a hat (or kaks :P) without feeling awkward or self aware"

:pac:

MilesMorales1 · 26-01-2016 01:59PM

Graces7 wrote: »

Here is a question! If you are at a cinema, eating out, at a match, you are surrounded by people even if you are not talking to them/ How about totally completely ALONE? Surely there is a difference? I count my shopping outings a time among people even if I don't chat with anyone. People are there so I am not alone... Alone is up here and even then when I am here on boards i am not really alone. See what I am getting at?

Well your not physically alone, but its mentally alone isn't it/

26-01-2016 02:31PM

MilesMorales1 wrote: »

Well your not physically alone, but its mentally alone isn't it/

Graces7 is right. There is something different about being completely and utterly alone without a soul around for miles. That's when it can get overwhelming for some people.

26-01-2016 02:39PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Graces7 is right. There is something different about being completely and utterly alone without a soul around for miles. That's when it can get overwhelming for some people.

Can be great though sometimes. I quite enjoy throwing a sack on my bag 2 or 3 times a year with the absolute basic needs - and then going for a run through the hills - or the wicklow way - or something for a few days. It is something I tried mainly because someone close to me loved it so I thought I would try myself.

Ok sometimes you pass a person or two depending on the place and time of year - but for the most part you see no one and certainly when you make camp there is no one else around. You really are miles for anyone (in every sense of the word if you do not bring things like a mobile phone).

Dial Hard · 26-01-2016 02:40PM

Graces7 wrote:

Here is a question! If you are at a cinema, eating out, at a match, you are surrounded by people even if you are not talking to them/ How about totally completely ALONE? Surely there is a difference? I count my shopping outings a time among people even if I don't chat with anyone. People are there so I am not alone... Alone is up here and even then when I am here on boards i am not really alone. See what I am getting at?

I'd consider that unnecessarily pedantic. Anyone can sit home alone watching tv or browsing the net. Far fewer people are comfortable going out for a meal or a drink or whatever on their own.

RobertKK · 26-01-2016 02:44PM

MilesMorales1 wrote: »

I think people would have cared a big 7ft 2 lad alone at a Taylor Swift concert would have been weird as ****.

ok you would stick out :pac: sorry, but it can't have been any worse than the friend I went with, and who ended up on youtube and this was before even TS appeared on stage.
Thankfully I avoided getting filmed.
I did see some older people at the concert looked to be in their mid 60s, so I think you would have been fine once you didn't block the view :P

sbsquarepants · 26-01-2016 02:45PM

Grueller wrote: »

I spend about 25 - 30 hours a week farming on my own. Just the sheepdog and me. I also run about 40- 50 miles a week on my own. I guess I just like my own company.

Maybe I have it wrong but shouldn't the dog be doing the running, leaving you free to concentrate on the whistling. That's how they do it on the telly anyway (I'm a city boy!)

I'm almost never alone, bar the drive to and from work, drives me fúcking mental! I like a bit of solitude.
On the very rare occasion that I have the house to myself, I tend to just chill. Stick on the ipod and read a magazine with a cup of tea or a beer - heaven.:D

26-01-2016 02:52PM

[Deleted User] wrote: »

Can be great though sometimes. I quite enjoy throwing a sack on my bag 2 or 3 times a year with the absolute basic needs - and then going for a run through the hills - or the wicklow way - or something for a few days. It is something I tried mainly because someone close to me loved it so I thought I would try myself.

Ok sometimes you pass a person or two depending on the place and time of year - but for the most part you see no one and certainly when you make camp there is no one else around. You really are miles for anyone (in every sense of the word if you do not bring things like a mobile phone).

Oh absolutely! I love it. I go up the mountains a lot. It's very peaceful and beautiful. Being in total isolation can be good for the mind.

Pac1Man · 26-01-2016 03:02PM

There are a lot of posts suggesting you need a bit from Pot A, another bit from Pot B and a dash from Pot C.

There are no rules. No right or wrong. How can there be? Just do what makes you happy.

FluffyMcCardy · 26-01-2016 05:10PM

Someone mentioned being alone but that's quite different from doing things on your own which is the point of this thread after all. You can be alone and not lonely or lonely in a crowd. But it is actually rare to be totally alone with your fate in your own hands. I've been in that situation quite a lot and sometimes I really didn't want come back.

Mesrine65 · 26-01-2016 06:06PM

I regularly travel to Glenveigh National Park in Donegal, just so I can be alone camping for a couple of days.

Set a few snares, do a bit of fishing/hiking, good for the soul.

CelticRambler · 26-01-2016 06:54PM

I'm a "loner", but like Azalea, I find "eating out" to be one of the few activities I can't get excited about. By "eating out" I mean going to a restaurant or other such formal venue - I'll quite happily take a picnic and walk off into the Alps with no expectation of finding anyone to share it with. Going to McDonalds or into a works cantine or the chipper, no problem; but there's definitely something different about a shared meal in a restaurant.

And I'm another one of those who really doesn't see the point of making a huge effort to arrange a cinema outing so you can sit in the dark and not talk to each other! But going to a gig/concert is different, and especially going to a dance - I'll set out on my own, but would be surprised not to find someone there that I've crossed paths with at another event. Then again, in the world of trad dance, it's easy to make friends where ever you are.

When it comes to travelling, I'm nearly always on my own seeing as I tend to tack it onto the beginning or the end of a work contract, and frequently it's genuinely alone (as in no other people around) because I'll travel through the night and stop off in deserted town centres (rarely any trouble finding a parking spot at 3am :pac: ) I've recently rediscovered my interest in photography, and it's great to be able to go looking for the perfect spot without someone else muttering something about why you've got to see what's up another grotty little lane and then stand around while the camera takes 30-second exposures!

Right now, hanging out for week on the German border and having the novelty of a proper town centre within walking distance, I'm trying to decide whether to go and see Star Wars VII in French or take my camera in search of interesting targets. :cool:

Figbiscuithead · 26-01-2016 07:38PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Graces7 is right. There is something different about being completely and utterly alone without a soul around for miles. That's when it can get overwhelming for some people.

But wasn't the question whether we do things on our own i.e. not with friends and partner? This is a different question to me.

Speaking for myself, the loneliest I've felt has been among people.

_Kaiser_ · 26-01-2016 08:10PM

I quite like doing stuff on my own, whether it's just reading or watching TV or driving. Gives ya time to relax and think (or NOT think) without having to be "on" for someone by making conversation or doing things or whatever

It's very important in a relationship as well that you make time for yourselves (when possible) as individuals as well as as a couple/parents.

Do you do things on your own?

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