The Dishwasher Conspiracy

It is with a somewhat fearful heart that I write this thread, but I've reached the point where I believe I must.

Dishwashers are a con. An out 'n out con.

But dare you say that to one of its ardent adherents!

They are a lie. A falsehood. ''A painted lady from the brow of the Superbrain.''

The cult of time-saving has enslaved us all.

Now, when we look for the one good knife, that one favourite bowl or plate, that one and only steamer - where is it?

Yup.

In the F***ink dishwasher.

Oh, no. Not 'left in the sink' - God no. Not, left on the counter - of course not. Who'd you think they are - Barbarians??

No. All is placed in the dishwasher. Out of sight. Out of mind. Their duty done.

The one item you need - that's in the dishwasher.

Placed there by responsible, upright citizens.

And, of course, in two or three days time, when the dishwasher is full (and NEVER, EVER before then) it will be washed.

Properly.

By a machine.

Properly.

None of that aul hot water, lemon squeezy, 'n elbow grease nonsense. No sir.

Properly. Or not at all.

And DARE you say different.


(But who - who empties the dishwasher? Hmmmm? (Shusshhh, don't even think that!))


So now, thanks to time-saving technology, we live in a world of unobtainable knives and crappy second choice plates. (And God help you if you rummage around in there, looking for that one good knife/ favourite plate. Sacrilege! Non-Believer!!)

And DARE you point out the craziness of it all.

Yup. We live in marvelous times.

Marvelous, I tell you.