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Overly positive people

2

Comments

  • #32
    Azalea
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,796 ✭✭✭Azalea


    In my experience it's people who have great, easy lives that tend to be the more miserable ones, and people who have gone through very difficult stuff who are the positive ones. It makes sense in some ways.


  • #33
    NIMAN
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 35,848 ✭✭✭✭NIMAN


    Those people who always post postive, life affirming quotes on FB?

    Most are sad.


  • #34
    Mountainsandh
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 6,705 ✭✭✭Mountainsandh


    martingriff wrote: »
    I find that attitude of yours awful to be honest. Why do they need to be suppressing it just because they have had 1 or 2 tumbles they have to be down in life why. I like seeing the world in a have full at lest light and not half empty. It does not mean they do not have bad times or sometimes feel down they see life for what you make it and YES you may hate it but it could be worse.

    I'm not saying they have to be a certain way ! This discussion focuses on people who are always optimistic and happy, and I'm simply pointing out that in my opinion, they just "seem" that way, in most cases. In my opinion, if you have times when you feel down, or things do get to you, it's OK, human, and normal to show it. It's unhealthy, and doesn't entice me to get to know a person better or spend more time with them, when that person acts happy and optimistic all the time, no matter what happens or happened to them. I smell a rat and it affects my trust in them.


  • #35
    LeeLooLee
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 422 ✭✭LeeLooLee


    Mountainsandh wrote: »
    I'm not saying they have to be a certain way ! This discussion focuses on people who are always optimistic and happy, and I'm simply pointing out that in my opinion, they just "seem" that way, in most cases. In my opinion, if you have times when you feel down, or things do get to you, it's OK, human, and normal to show it. It's unhealthy, and doesn't entice me to get to know a person better or spend more time with them, when that person acts happy and optimistic all the time, no matter what happens or happened to them. I smell a rat and it affects my trust in them.

    Same. It doesn't seem genuine, that's why. My ex used to put on a happy front all the time for the benefit of others, but then every now and then he'd totally blow up because of the simmering resentment and anger. Far better just to have a moan when things are going wrong, it's just human! Once you don't bang on and on about it and let it take over your life.


  • #36
    trixychic
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,138 ✭✭✭trixychic


    (Nearly afraid to post here)

    I was told off in my last job for being "overly bubbly" when I was on the phone. I was receptionist for a large multi national company so was always trying to be helpful and nice.... turns out it was too much. Whoops

    Slot of ppl comment on how happy, bubbly and energetic I am ALL the time. Trust me its not out of want. I sure as he'll don't feel that way. I just try to be kind and help out when I can.








    Ok I'm running away now!!!!


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  • #37
    Azalea
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,796 ✭✭✭Azalea


    trixychic wrote: »
    I was told off in my last job for being "overly bubbly" when I was on the phone. I was receptionist for a large multi national company so was always trying to be helpful and nice.... turns out it was too much. Whoops
    FFS.

    Fair play to you - good attitude.


  • #38
    Junkyard Tom
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,115 ✭✭✭✭Junkyard Tom


    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jd4tugPM83c


  • #39
    gormdubhgorm
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 20,503 ✭✭✭✭gormdubhgorm


    It is threads like this that cheer me up! If I am positively negative about positve people. Does that turn into a plus, therefore positive and therefore a happy buzz of giving out?

    Guff about stuff, and stuff about guff.



  • #40
    Mesrine65
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,949 ✭✭✭Mesrine65


    Overly positive people inspire my inner serial killer (twice I've used that today :pac:)


  • #41
    M.T. Cranium
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,194 ✭✭✭✭M.T. Cranium


    I met an overly positive person once. Needless to say, problem solved.


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  • #42
    Bongalongherb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,766 ✭✭✭Bongalongherb


    gormdubhgorm wrote: »
    It is threads like this that cheer me up! If I am positively negative about positve people. Does that turn into a plus, therefore positive and therefore a happy buzz of giving out?

    Positive cannot exist without negative. They are both the main structure of all physical and electrical connections. We'll just have to live with the differences and anomalies.


  • #43
    Amazingfun
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,161 ✭✭✭Amazingfun


    Good news for you OP:


    http://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/12/happiness-doesnt-help-you-live-longer/419772/
    Happiness Doesn't Help You Live Longer


  • #44
    nervous_twitch
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 850 ✭✭✭nervous_twitch


    As a dyed-in-the-wool cynic, I have recently become so endeared to people who are positive by nature. Not grin and endure, fake-smile folk, but those who have the ability to realise things could be so much worse and continue on.


  • #45
    jamesbere
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,022 ✭✭✭jamesbere


    nervous_twitch wrote: »
    As a dyed-in-the-wool cynic, I have recently become so endeared to people who are positive by nature. Not grin and endure, fake-smile folk, but those who have the ability to realise things could be so much worse and continue on.

    Actually I find that people that are positive by nature, generally look at things getting better. They look at their life and see it can be better if I'm positive and move on.

    I think it's counter productive to continuously think that circumstances in life could be worse, your never really going to move on in your life. Just constantly think that what you have is good when in reality it probably isn't.

    Been positivity is great but I think if you use it in the right way it can be a great benefit to your life.


  • #46
    Corpus Twisty
    Closed Accounts Posts: 396 ✭✭Corpus Twisty


    Kevin Bridges put it as "not having been punched in the face enough as kids..."

    I kinda agree. Feck off with your positivity..


  • #47
    crazygeryy
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,065 ✭✭✭crazygeryy


    I meet a woman every day that i dont really know, but i know she has cancer.shes a young woman with kids family etc
    EVERY time i meet her she has a huge glowing smile and asks me how i am today and me with the sometimes grumpy head on me.

    Happy Christmas to her and her family.hope everything works out well.


  • #48
    Figbiscuithead
    Closed Accounts Posts: 307 ✭✭Figbiscuithead


    I'd say I've a fairly positive outlook on life and am one of these people who sees it as a gift but I do complain and moan sometimes. I know the kind outlined in the OP - people who can't have a little moan now and then EVER.

    I think absolutely fair play to them and I'd love to be like them so long as they're sincere about it but I tend to feel like an absolute arsehole alongside them, so I can't really stick them for very long. I do have a lot of admiration for them but sometimes (and I mean sometimes - I don't moan all that often) I just need to moan and to have someone there to make all the right noises for a few minutes and to move on. Life is great but sometimes it's really monumentally ****e and there's no harm acknowledging that sometimes.


  • #49
    Azalea
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,796 ✭✭✭Azalea


    crazygeryy wrote: »
    I meet a woman every day that i dont really know, but i know she has cancer.shes a young woman with kids family etc
    EVERY time i meet her she has a huge glowing smile and asks me how i am today and me with the sometimes grumpy head on me.

    Happy Christmas to her and her family.hope everything works out well.
    My auntie battled breast cancer and won - her attitude was amazing. It was positive and strong and humorous. It was genuine too - not that forced stuff that can be quite grating. It was a case of "well, being miserable will only make things worse, what will be will be" etc. I'd reckon it was part of what helped her survive. Stress surely exacerbates cancer.


  • #50
    valoren
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 5,619 ✭✭✭valoren


    I find it easy to determine who is a Dr Phil-Fake it till you make it-person and someone who is confidently self assured with a generally positive outlook.


  • #51
    Heat_Wave
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,224 ✭✭✭Heat_Wave


    The problem is, majority of people cannot relate to people who are positive all the time, as these 'overly positive' people tend not to show emotions of anger and sadness, which lets face it, is only a part of human nature.

    I would be very curious to know how happy these people really are behind closed doors. Not very happy I would imagine.

    Expressing emotions is something which should be encouraged and not forced upon people to suppress, especially in a working environment.


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  • #52
    Hammer89
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,004 ✭✭✭Hammer89


    I don't care what anyone says - an abundance of positivity is better than an abundance of negativity. It's hard to listen to a negative person complain and I mean that literally. If you're being bombarded with negative sh*t I think your brain rejects it on a subconscious level and just drifts off into a world of its own.

    I was very close with an emphysema sufferer, who has sadly passed away. I loved the man like a second dad but I avoided him on certain days, solely because I didn't want to hear him moan. He was 66, and a United fan in the Moyes era so that didn't help any. Initially I regretted avoiding him sometimes, but I did more than enough for him throughout the course of his decline to exonerate me from a guilty conscience.


  • #53
    Lux23
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,134 ✭✭✭Lux23


    I have a much bigger problem with overly negative people.


  • #54
    circadian
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 7,770 ✭✭✭circadian


    Hammer89 wrote: »
    I don't care what anyone says - an abundance of positivity is better than an abundance of negativity. It's hard to listen to a negative person complain and I mean that literally. If you're being bombarded with negative sh*t I think your brain rejects it on a subconscious level and just drifts off into a world of its own.

    Exactly this. I have a family member who is in regular contact. Everything, I mean everything is negative. Telling me I've done this or that wrong then when I do what they suggest, that's wrong. Being negative for the sake of being negative.

    It's so draining talking to someone who is just ALWAYS looking for the negative. Someone who is positive is much easier to be around, even if it's a mind numbing silly positive. Body language goes a long way.


  • #55
    donegaLroad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,379 ✭✭✭donegaLroad


    Sh1tbag OToole wrote: »
    Everyone knows a few of these and often I find they can be worse than listening a pessimistic ould dhrip. At least the ould dhrip often brings up a few interesting points and isn't so "in your face" as the overly positive ones.

    You could walk up to the door looking pale as a ghost after a powerful vomiting session and they'd be all "Helloooo, great to see you, you're looking well, how is everybody, my little Eoin here just got an award for champion rice crispy bun maker of the year in all of North Cork and he's only foive, isn't he brilliant? I'm sure he'll be a Michelin star chef by next week!"

    You'd ask about someone who they were close to who recently died a slow and agonising death and they'd be "Oh he passed away but the funeral was absolutely amazing, so and so showed up and they were so sweet and gave a bottle of wine to all his children and brought a pack of biscuits for everyone in the audience and the whole place just reeked of pure highly refined awesomeness".

    If you tell them you lost your job and the gf dumped you they'd quickly rattle off a list of tired old 'new beginning' and 'plenty of fish' platitudes and catch phrases that came straight out of an unbranded tin that they have 100's of and quickly move on to the next 'absolutely amazing' thing going down on in their life.

    I'd be there thinking "Yea... you're on some good stuff there, wish I could get my hands on some of that" and wondering if the only amazing thing in their life is Big Pharma's latest anti-depressant or if they spend the whole day in La La land and only come out of it when I visit.

    Has anyone here a few good tales to tell about someone who was extremely positive in the face of impending doom?


    I think that it is a cultural thing. Having lived for a while in Canada, I often remember wondering what was it about Ireland that made everyone's attitude so 'hard'. Canada was such a contrast to back home. For example I was in a line up in a shop and I sneezed, a couple of people turned around and 'oh bless you' etc. Back in Ireland they would take a couple of steps away from you in case they picked up something from the diseased flea-bag next to them.

    In fact the longer I spent in Canada, the more I yearned for the negativity of Ireland. A place where you could curse out loud, and where people dont drink glasses of water between pints, or floss their teeth every day, or analyze the labels in the supermarket.

    An overly positive society can turn a place very bland, imo.


  • #56
    Hammer89
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 3,004 ✭✭✭Hammer89


    Canadians are ridiculously nice. Even the crackheads are well-mannered and polite individuals. The junkies in Dublin scribble something on a bit of cardboard, and sit with their heads between their legs for the entire day with a rain-soaked McDonalds coffee cup beside them. But the lads in Canada - well Toronto anyway - sit upright against a building. They're lucid and smart enough to know that politeness is the best way to earning crack money.


  • #57
    PTH2009
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 41,152 ✭✭✭✭PTH2009


    When my ex ****ed off in 2013 I was told all this **** 'it wasn't meant to be', plenty of fish in the sea', a new beginning etc and it got me nowhere only giving me false hope. She's with someone now where my life has gone to ****.

    These people probly suffer with bigger depression behind closed doors than permanent sufferers


  • #58
    wakka12
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 9,786 ✭✭✭wakka12


    Love positive people, always make me feel good. Don't like people who think its cool to **** on positive people for no apparent reason.


  • #59
    Sh1tbag OToole
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,971 ✭✭✭Sh1tbag OToole


    PTH2009 wrote: »
    When my ex ****ed off in 2013 I was told all this **** 'it wasn't meant to be', plenty of fish in the sea', a new beginning etc and it got me nowhere only giving me false hope. She's with someone now where my life has gone to ****.

    These people probly suffer with bigger depression behind closed doors than permanent sufferers

    That can happen. Sometimes one has to face up to the bitter grim reality instead of covering the place with powder sugar


  • #60
    saintsaltynuts
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,127 ✭✭✭saintsaltynuts


    Nobody has it that easy I think.A bit of positive thinking never killed anyone.


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  • #61
    donegaLroad
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,379 ✭✭✭donegaLroad


    PTH2009 wrote: »
    When my ex ****ed off in 2013 I was told all this **** 'it wasn't meant to be', plenty of fish in the sea', a new beginning etc and it got me nowhere only giving me false hope. She's with someone now where my life has gone to ****.

    These people probly suffer with bigger depression behind closed doors than permanent sufferers


    'The strongest steel is forged in the hottest fire, and the seeds of strength are often contained within the husk of weakness.'


    I know you are probably sick hearing it, but you will get through it.. there is a Personal Issues forum on boards, it might be a good place to start.


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