Most stupid requests you've ever had at work?

petrolcan · 09-10-2015 03:08PM

New Home wrote: »

Serious question - is there such a thing as a replacement 'glass bubble part' for spirit levels?

Yes, used to work in a shop that supplied them.

Wossack · 09-10-2015 03:39PM

petrolcan wrote: »

Yes, used to work in a shop that supplied them.

kept em on the same shelf that had the glass hammers, and tartan paint

Kimbot · 09-10-2015 03:44PM

Wossack wrote: »

kept em on the same shelf that had the glass hammers, and tartan paint

right under the elbow grease

Kimbot · 09-10-2015 03:51PM

rainbowdrop wrote: »

You just reminded me of the time years ago, working in my first proper job in a factory, and they were doing a stock take.

There were big plastic boxes full of small parts (literally thousands of screws, nuts and bolts etc in each box), and I was told to count them. Well, I spent about 3hrs in the storeroom counting them out by hand, and tallying them up with a pen and paper. I kept losing count and having to start again.

Eventually, the boss came to see what was taking me so long, and started laughing his head off when he saw what I was at. When he calmed down, he told me about the 'weighing machine', and showed me how I should have been weighing 1 screw, then throwing the whole box into the plastic box on top of the machine and it would calculate how many screws were in it....

Wish he showed me how to do that 3hrs earlier..... Wouldn't mind, but he told the whole place so I got mocked by everyone for weeks afterwardsðŸ˜„

I worked in the place that all your Esso Tiger Tokens (Remember them?) would end up, we had to count all the tokens sent back in by the garages every couple of months before we sent them for destruction. The lads tried catching me out with the count them manually until I copped we were by a weighing scales

MarkAnthony · 09-10-2015 04:08PM

jonny24ie wrote: »

right under the elbow grease

Opposite the long stand and weight (wait)

emeldc · 09-10-2015 04:20PM

My brother had a small garage in London in the 90's. He took on a young lad to give him a hand. The young lad was under a car one day struggling to get an exhaust bracket off. My brother asked him if he was turning the nut clockwise or anti-clockwise. After a short pause the young lad said, 'I'm not sure gaff, I only have a digital, init'. That was his last day.

09-10-2015 04:35PM

monkeysnapper wrote: »

I once worked in a shop and the manager on duty gave me a box of green bananas and told me to take them to the area manager that was in store this day and show him . He was disgusted !!!!

I politely told him I wouldn't be doing this as everybody doing donkey impressions of me for next 2 years would be to degrading .

I did him a huge favour really.

I think the poster means that the manager on duty was disgusted the bananas were green and believed them to be gone off; whereas Infact green = not ripe yet :P and he didn't know this fact, just assumed yellow coloured is good

Maybe?

New Home · 09-10-2015 06:41PM

petrolcan wrote: »

Yes, used to work in a shop that supplied them.

Thanks Petrolcan, I thought there must have been such a thing - I couldn't figure out why you would throw out a broken spirit level when you should have been able to just replace the vial.

Wossack wrote: »

kept em on the same shelf that had the glass hammers, and tartan paint

:rolleyes:

jonny24ie wrote: »

right under the elbow grease

:rolleyes:

MarkAnthony wrote: »

Opposite the long stand and weight (wait)

:rolleyes:

Turns out you can even find those vials on the internet, so there, ye of little faith. :cool:

http://www.leveldevelopments.com/products/vials/

Paddy Cow · 09-10-2015 07:23PM

New Home wrote: »

Thanks Petrolcan, I thought there must have been such a thing - I couldn't figure out why you would throw out a broken spirit level when you should have been able to just replace the vial.

The joke is that you cannot get a spirit level bubble.

New Home · 09-10-2015 07:25PM

If by bubble you mean the glass vial, yes you can. If you mean the air bubble inside the vial, then I agree with you.

Paddy Cow · 09-10-2015 07:27PM

New Home wrote: »

If by bubble you mean the glass vial, yes you can. If you mean the air bubble inside the vial, then I agree with you.

That's what the greenhorns were sent looking for. It wouldn't have worked on you though :P

my3cents · 09-10-2015 07:32PM

Paddy Cow wrote: »

The joke is that you cannot get a spirit level bubble.

AKA Goldfish fart, but how do they collect the goldfish farts and get the goldfish producing them to a standard size?

New Home · 09-10-2015 07:38PM

Paddy Cow wrote: »

That's what the greenhorns were sent looking for. It wouldn't have worked on you though :P

...might have, back in the day...

my3cents wrote: »

AKA Goldfish fart, but how do they collect the goldfish farts and get the goldfish producing them to a standard size?

I think they've trained Koi to do the collecting. Just feed the goldfish a pre-set quantity of beans, of course, and voilà! :pac:

MarkAnthony · 09-10-2015 10:25PM

New Home wrote: »

If by bubble you mean the glass vial, yes you can. If you mean the air bubble inside the vial, then I agree with you.

Any chance of fetching the bucket of steam and box of sparks? :pac:

EDIT: While you're there could you grab me a left handed screwdriver please?

tomwaterford · 09-10-2015 10:27PM

MarkAnthony wrote: »

Any chance of fetching the bucket of steam and box of sparks? :pac:

Go for the giggling pin or find the laughing shaft :rolleyes:

This Fat Girl Runs · 09-10-2015 10:28PM

Regular occurrence: Senior Partner asks me to email him a document. I do so. Senior Partner then gets up from his desk, walks PAST the printer, up to my desk and asks me to print same document. :rolleyes:

New Home · 09-10-2015 10:31PM

MarkAnthony wrote: »

Any chance of fetching the bucket of steam and box of sparks? :pac:

EDIT: While you're there could you grab me a left handed screwdriver please?

If you'd told me sooner I'd have kept a bucket of steam for you, but I just sold the last one earlier. As for the box of sparks, we don't keep our electricians in boxes, it's downright cruel, and you should know better.

Now, we do have left handed mugs -they'll cost you, mind you- but we've got only multidirectional screwdrivers left.

New Home · 09-10-2015 10:33PM

This Fat Girl Runs wrote: »

Regular occurrence: Senior Partner asks me to email him a document. I do so. Senior Partner then gets up from his desk, walks PAST the printer, up to my desk and asks me to print same document. :rolleyes:

That's the kind of thing that would bring people to murder...

my3cents · 09-10-2015 10:42PM

New Home wrote: »

That's the kind of thing that would bring people to murder...

I know one CEO that still writes all his emails with the CAPS LOCK ON.

New Home · 09-10-2015 11:05PM

my3cents wrote: »

I know one CEO that still writes all his emails with the CAPS LOCK ON.

WELL, HE'S A BIG BOSS, SO HE NEEDS BIG LETTERS... :rolleyes:

petrolcan · 10-10-2015 09:20AM

Wossack wrote: »

kept em on the same shelf that had the glass hammers, and tartan paint

Beside the left handed screwdrivers.

BTW, you do realise that there is such a thing as a glass hammer?

DopeTech · 04-11-2015 10:42PM

Bump!

I want to hear more stories about the computer illiterate!

Captain Flaps · 05-11-2015 12:55PM

I'm prepping graphics for a project and each time I send a draft over for approval or feedback the client downloads the files from my mail and then reattaches them to his replies... I think he might think I need him to send the 'original' back so I can make the necessary changes!

I know he's doing this because each time he comes back to me the attachment is called

file.jpg
file (1).jpg
file (1)(1).jpg... etc

osarusan · 05-11-2015 01:24PM

So, this presentation we have to give, do we actually present it, or just send you the slides we made?

This Fat Girl Runs · 05-11-2015 01:26PM

Not quite a stupid request but something stupid happened recently!

I had an issue with my pc at work so IT logged on remotely to solve it. 20 minutes later I'm still waiting to get access to my pc back...I ring IT and was told 'sure I emailed you to say you could log back on'. :rolleyes:

05-11-2015 02:31PM

porsche959 wrote: »

Always Be Closing!

superb film!!!!

a guy does not come onto the lot lest he wants to buyyyyyy!!!

aoh · 06-11-2015 02:29PM

Used to work in the IT department of a big retailer, and got a panic phone call from Marketing about how the system calculated special offers. This code had not changed in years, but they insisted that "there are two ways of calculating percentage, but only one of them is right, so can I please tell them which one we're using" ?!?

waraf · 06-11-2015 03:24PM

The IT guy who worked for the company that was located on the floor above us was on holiday for a week and my boss told them that I would cover any urgent IT related issues that happened during the week.

Anyway, I got an email from one of the employees upstairs about an urgent issue that needed to be resolved. I made my way up there and was met by a woman who was about 30. She was in a complete tizzy cause she needed to print a document out and couldn't get it to print.

I went over to her desk with her and asked her to show me the problem. She explained that she wasn't able to print out pages 5 to 10 of a word document she had open. The document contained a total of 4 pages!!

She didn't even say thanks (or sorry for wasting your time) for coming up to have a look. She just sat there staring at the screen until I wandered off.

berettaman · 06-11-2015 04:10PM

Not IT but here it Goes:

Worked in an Accountancy office in the peoples republic of Cork. A lad in the office went on Hols in the south East.

He came back two weeks later and said it was deadly..."I didn't know they had playstation in Wexford..."

Emailed a pdf to a lady in the Revenue... She emailed me back and said that she can't open pdf files, can I print off the attachment and post it to her!!!

06-11-2015 05:31PM

berettaman wrote: »

Emailed a pdf to a lady in the Revenue... She emailed me back and said that she can't open pdf files, can I print off the attachment and post it to her!!!

Ah that's government email for you, probably a security thing.

Most stupid requests you've ever had at work?

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