Taking chances....

job seeker · 06-09-2015 01:59AM #1

Taking chances is something that scares some people. Maybe the fear of getting rejected or perhaps it’s just the fear of the unknown. But why? What is it that makes somebody think they aren't good enough to be in a relationship with that special someone? Like that lady or fella down at the local spar. Each day you go in and go to ask him or her out. But before you know it your walking out the door with that 7th packet of wriggles extra chewing gum that week, or maybe that co-worker you see every day, you feel like you need to take the chance to ask him/ or her out. In your head you’re telling yourself you must but only a “hello” leaves your mouth, you then trod over to your desk and computer surrounded my matchbox racers and a photo of your dog where you take a seat. Or maybe even it’s that person who sings at mass every Sunday and there voice is so unbelievable they sound like an angle.

For me it was last year I started work, went in and I was introduced to everyone, this one girl stood out to me, she was just perfect. We got along well. I really wanted to take this chance to ask her out but there was always the voice in the back of my head which was telling me “No, don’t do this” etc. etc. I don’t know, I’d generally consider myself to be an outgoing person. But for some reason this was never something I could take a chance in. So to make a long story short, I never took my chance, she left work for a better job and I said to myself “Augh, plenty more fish in the sea”. I’ve been on a few dates since, but I’ve not been attracted to another girl since. So this has me thinking ‘Is there really more fish in the sea’? I really don’t think there is at this point. I used to, but I would have been younger and more foolish then. Or this ling of ‘whatever will be, will be’ kind of attitude . It won’t be though, not if you don’t take that chance. Life is short, but it’s far too short to be beating around the bush. So this is one very important lesson I’ve learned in the past 10 months.

So AFTER HOURS did you ever miss out a chance, which you now look back on and think “I really should have took it” Or maybe you did and how did it work out???

dodderangler · 06-09-2015 02:03AM

Failed interview in army and never went back t try again.
Still regret it t this day

job seeker · 06-09-2015 02:06AM

dodderangler wrote: »

Failed interview in army and never went back t try again.
Still regret it t this day

Was there any particular reason you didn't try again?

Cold War Kid · 06-09-2015 02:12AM

Would you have any way of contacting this woman again OP?

job seeker · 06-09-2015 02:15AM

Cold War Kid wrote: »

Would you have any way of contacting this woman again OP?

Facebook, But I don't know f I should.

dodderangler · 06-09-2015 02:18AM

job seeker wrote: »

Was there any particular reason you didn't try again?

I was 17 still in school when I went for it and when I finished school I was offered mechanic apprenticeship straight away so I took that instead and done that an want t be in army now.
26 years old now and want t do it

Cold War Kid · 06-09-2015 02:20AM

job seeker wrote: »

Facebook, But I don't know f I should.

I think you should go for it - which would be worse, rejection (maybe) or kicking yourself that you never went for it?
Easier said than done though, of course.

Cold War Kid · 06-09-2015 02:22AM

dodderangler wrote: »

I was 17 still in school when I went for it and when I finished school I was offered mechanic apprenticeship straight away so I took that instead and done that an want t be in army now.
26 years old now and want t do it

Still young enough to join the Reserves.

dodderangler · 06-09-2015 02:23AM

Cold War Kid wrote: »

Still young enough to join the Reserves.

But what possibility could I then get into army or is there any chance at all

job seeker · 06-09-2015 02:24AM

Cold War Kid wrote: »

I think you should go for it - which would be worse, rejection (maybe) or kicking yourself that you never went for it?
Easier said than done though, of course.

Well, you maybe right. It is indeed easier said than done.

wil · 06-09-2015 02:32AM

You got along really well, yet on her leaving, neither of you broached the idea of even meeting up someday as people often do.
Sounds like she wasn't taking any chances.

job seeker · 06-09-2015 02:35AM

wil wrote: »

You got along really well, yet on her leaving, neither of you broached the idea of even meeting up someday as people often do.
Sounds like she wasn't taking any chances.

Ya, but it wasn't like I'm finishing working here... It was more like she was working and the left suddenly.. Some thing to do with hours worked or something..

ardinn · 06-09-2015 02:48AM

Ya - I had the chance either blow up my car (it was overheating) or drive 15miles to where the particular lady was staying - I hadnt a bob for a taxi so chose to walk 3 miles home.

I should have said just f*ck the car and driven the bollix out of it - she's with someone else now and seems very happy unfortunately

DEFTLEFTHAND · 06-09-2015 06:32AM

dodderangler wrote: »

I was 17 still in school when I went for it and when I finished school I was offered mechanic apprenticeship straight away so I took that instead and done that an want t be in army now.
26 years old now and want t do it

Is there an age limit to it? Surely a man in his 20s who's keen like yourself would be the kind of men they'd want to recruit.

You would be more mature and receptive to military discipline than a 17 year old punk kid out of school.

Don't Chute! · 06-09-2015 07:42AM

What does an angle sound like?

galljga1 · 06-09-2015 07:48AM

black and amber wrote: »

What does an angle sound like?

Quite sharp and can be oblique or obtuse if the topic does not suit them.
All can be forgiven, depending on how acute they are.

Naos · 06-09-2015 09:40AM

job seeker wrote: »

Facebook, But I don't know f I should.

This valuable lesson you have learned, you've not really learned it.

Contact the lady now and report back, stop beating around the bush, life is short (sound familiar?).

LDN_Irish · 06-09-2015 10:14AM

Naos wrote: »

This valuable lesson you have learned, you've not really learned it.

Contact the lady now and report back, stop beating around the bush, life is short (sound familiar?).

Agree with this post. Go for it. Nothing to lose.

gramar · 06-09-2015 10:19AM

I took a chance once. It said "Go directly to jail. Do not pass go, do not collect $200"

As Naos said...go for it. Listen to your own advice. Don't waste your time playing Monopoly.

December2012 · 06-09-2015 10:22AM

Well, there was the time I could have met Mr. T at the mall. The entire day, I kept saying, "I'll go a little later, I'll go a little later..." And when I got there, they told me he just left. And when I asked the mall guy if he'll ever come back again, he said he didn't know. Well, I'm never going to let something like that happen again!

Buona Fortuna · 06-09-2015 10:23AM

dodderangler wrote: »

I was 17 still in school when I went for it and when I finished school I was offered mechanic apprenticeship straight away so I took that instead and done that an want t be in army now.
26 years old now and want t do it

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

Is there an age limit to it? Surely a man in his 20s who's keen like yourself would be the kind of men they'd want to recruit.

You would be more mature and receptive to military discipline than a 17 year old punk kid out of school.

At 24 (few years ago now) I was in the reserves and a guy in the regulars said, you should come with us, you'd be a seargeant in no time.

Kinda regret it, but .... then again.

So you could do it, just make sure your fitness is good.

happyoutscan · 06-09-2015 11:01AM

December2012 wrote: »

Well, there was the time I could have met Mr. T at the mall. The entire day, I kept saying, "I'll go a little later, I'll go a little later..." And when I got there, they told me he just left. And when I asked the mall guy if he'll ever come back again, he said he didn't know. Well, I'm never going to let something like that happen again!

I pity the fool.

MarkY91 · 06-09-2015 11:05AM

I'm 24. The reserve topic going on here interests me too. If you start a thread on the military forum, id appreciate if you let me know

Cold War Kid · 06-09-2015 11:44AM

DEFTLEFTHAND wrote: »

Is there an age limit to it? Surely a man in his 20s who's keen like yourself would be the kind of men they'd want to recruit.

You would be more mature and receptive to military discipline than a 17 year old punk kid out of school.

Age limit 25.

Buona Fortuna · 06-09-2015 01:28PM

Cold War Kid wrote: »

Age limit 25.

Yep just read that http://www.military.ie/careers/army/recruits/

Sorry should just kept my trap shut.

Nib · 06-09-2015 01:32PM

Cold War Kid wrote: »

Age limit 25.

Is there any reason for this? It's very low, 30 would be more appropriate IMO.

tempnam · 06-09-2015 01:47PM

job seeker wrote: »

Taking chances is something that scares some people. Maybe the fear of getting rejected or perhaps it’s just the fear of the unknown. But why? What is it that makes somebody think they aren't good enough to be in a relationship with that special someone? Like that lady or fella down at the local spar. Each day you go in and go to ask him or her out. But before you know it your walking out the door with that 7th packet of wriggles extra chewing gum that week, or maybe that co-worker you see every day, you feel like you need to take the chance to ask him/ or her out. In your head you’re telling yourself you must but only a “hello” leaves your mouth, you then trod over to your desk and computer surrounded my matchbox racers and a photo of your dog where you take a seat. Or maybe even it’s that person who sings at mass every Sunday and there voice is so unbelievable they sound like an angle.

For me it was last year I started work, went in and I was introduced to everyone, this one girl stood out to me, she was just perfect. We got along well. I really wanted to take this chance to ask her out but there was always the voice in the back of my head which was telling me “No, don’t do this” etc. etc. I don’t know, I’d generally consider myself to be an outgoing person. But for some reason this was never something I could take a chance in. So to make a long story short, I never took my chance, she left work for a better job and I said to myself “Augh, plenty more fish in the sea”. I’ve been on a few dates since, but I’ve not been attracted to another girl since. So this has me thinking ‘Is there really more fish in the sea’? I really don’t think there is at this point. I used to, but I would have been younger and more foolish then. Or this ling of ‘whatever will be, will be’ kind of attitude . It won’t be though, not if you don’t take that chance. Life is short, but it’s far too short to be beating around the bush. So this is one very important lesson I’ve learned in the past 10 months.

So AFTER HOURS did you ever miss out a chance, which you now look back on and think “I really should have took it” Or maybe you did and how did it work out???

I'd say it's more that people (either consciously or subconsciously) will weigh up the risk Vs reward in their mind before taking certain chances.

Like the girl in your job.... if it wasn't someone you worked with but instead you met her frequently in a more casual social setting, you might have allocated a lot less risk with asking her out. i.e. if she said 'no' then there's no big deal - you didn't have to continue bumping into her.

But since you were working with her you possibly thought to yourself that the risk of rejection and the following awkwardness of having to work with this person (seeing her every day) was not worth it - and could have made your working life quite uncomfortable.

Different people perceive risk in different ways. There may be 2 people presented with the exact same opportunity. One will jump at the chance while the other will decline as they perceive some sort of 'risk' that's not worth taking.

People are strange!

Valetta · 06-09-2015 03:14PM

I've backed Galway to beat Kilkenny .

Does that count?

Yellowblackbird · 06-09-2015 03:18PM

"Next to knowing when to seize an opportunity, the most important thing in life is to know when to forego an advantage." Benny.

ShamoBuc · 06-09-2015 03:20PM

Valetta wrote: »

I've backed Galway to beat Kilkenny .

Does that count?

Yes and I've done the same!

whatawaster81 · 06-09-2015 03:21PM

Yep wish I had emigrated 5/6 years ago, went back to college to another qualification, career still in the doldrums, going grey now, no significant other and long gone past going to the party, and will be gone before Christmas anyway if the right opportunity doesn't come along. Really hate the place.

Taking chances....

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