Women more likely to ask for divorce

Playboy · 22-08-2015 10:31PM #1

Interesting article in Time which describes the results of a study which states that women are far more likely to initiate a divorce in comparison to men (69% vs 31%). However in non married couples the initiation of the end of the relationship was split evenly between the genders.

I think most guys and maybe some gals would think that the answer to why this is the case would be fairly obvious. You would assume that women generally do better financially out of divorce than men given that traditional roles are still fairly prevalent in a lot of western societies with men being the primary breadwinner and the women splitting their time between work and kids or just full time mums/housewives. If a woman can keep the family home, keep the kids and get spousal and child maintenance then it must be a fairly attractive option if you are bored with the husband or he has turned into a bit of a dck.

But what I love about this article is the complete absence of this explanation for the skewed figures.. Instead we get the following explanation;

Women may be responding to the still arcane conventions of spousal roles, which contrast with growing equality in other institutions, such as the workplace. “I think that marriage as an institution has been a little bit slow to catch up with expectations for gender equality. Wives still take their husbands’ surnames, and are sometimes pressured to do so. Husbands still expect their wives to do the bulk of the housework and the bulk of the childcare,” he said in the statement. “On the other hand, I think that non-marital relationships lack the historical baggage and expectations of marriage, which makes the non-marital relationships more flexible and therefore more adaptable to modern expectations … of gender equality.”

Now I must point out that this study was led by a man (Michael Rosenfeld - Stanford) and the comments above are his. So what say you? Man afraid to state the obvious in fear of a backlash or the above explanation makes total sense?

Source

Calahonda52 · 22-08-2015 10:43PM

can't wait for his reaction when he realises how the Irish equality referendum will queer the pitch for research such as this as it will be 100% of married women and 100% of married men

Fox_In_Socks · 22-08-2015 10:43PM

I've been reading Afterhours for a while and I'm of the opinion now that I won't let any of those bloodsucking harridans near me or my finances.

Junkyard Tom · 22-08-2015 10:47PM

Playboy wrote: »

I think most guys and maybe some gals would think that the answer to why this is the case would be fairly obvious.

It's not obvious at all.

Lucifer MorningStar · 22-08-2015 10:47PM

Playboy wrote: »

Interesting article in Time which describes the results of a study which states that women are far more likely to initiate a divorce in comparison to men (69% vs 31%). However in non married couples the initiation of the end of the relationship was split evenly between the genders.

I think most guys and maybe some gals would think that the answer to why this is the case would be fairly obvious. You would assume that women generally do better financially out of divorce than men given that traditional roles are still fairly prevalent in a lot of western societies with men being the primary breadwinner and the women splitting their time between work and kids or just full time mums/housewives. If a woman can keep the family home, keep the kids and get spousal and child maintenance then it must be a fairly attractive option if you are bored with the husband or he has turned into a bit of a dck.

But what I love about this article is the complete absence of this explanation for the skewed figures.. Instead we get the following explanation;

Women may be responding to the still arcane conventions of spousal roles, which contrast with growing equality in other institutions, such as the workplace. “I think that marriage as an institution has been a little bit slow to catch up with expectations for gender equality. Wives still take their husbands’ surnames, and are sometimes pressured to do so. Husbands still expect their wives to do the bulk of the housework and the bulk of the childcare,” he said in the statement. “On the other hand, I think that non-marital relationships lack the historical baggage and expectations of marriage, which makes the non-marital relationships more flexible and therefore more adaptable to modern expectations … of gender equality.”

Now I must point out that this study was led by a man (Michael Rosenfeld - Stanford) and the comments above are his. So what say you? Man afraid to state the obvious in fear of a backlash or the above explanation makes total sense?

Source

That's exactly the reason why I will never get married. If it goes tits up its always the bloke who gets shafted.

jaymcg91 · 22-08-2015 10:49PM

I'd say it's because men will put up with a lot for quiet life, whereas women won't

.

SureYWouldntYa · 22-08-2015 10:50PM

Men know they're the ones who'll get shafted if it happens

ceadaoin. · 22-08-2015 10:50PM

Another woman bashing thread then. When we aren't tricking men into raising another guys child, we're marrying and divorcing just to get some property and money. Sure what other reason would there be for leaving a marriage?

Pink Lemons · 22-08-2015 10:51PM

Now I ain't saying she's a gold digger..

22-08-2015 10:51PM

Junkyard Tom wrote: »

It's not obvious at all.

I would have thought one obvious explanation would be that men do more things that lead women to ask for a divorce. Violence, cheating, drinking, gambling, child abuse etc. etc.

Junkyard Tom · 22-08-2015 10:55PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I would have thought one obvious explanation would be that men do more things that lead women to ask for a divorce. Violence, cheating, drinking, gambling, child abuse etc. etc.

I have no idea if that's true or not but what piques my interest is that it's primarily women who are initiating divorce proceedings which is kind of a big deal. Personally, I wouldn't have to be asked twice.

ceadaoin. · 22-08-2015 10:57PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I would have thought one obvious explanation would be that men do more things that lead women to ask for a divorce. Violence, cheating, drinking, gambling, child abuse etc. etc.

And there's been a change in attitudes towards these things I think. Women nowadays are far less likely to put up with being mistreated than previous generations combined with better resources to enable victims of domestic abuse to leave such as women's shelters etc.

Colser · 22-08-2015 10:57PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I would have thought one obvious explanation would be that men do more things that lead women to ask for a divorce. Violence, cheating, drinking, gambling, child abuse etc. etc.

Thanking this just in relation to the cheating part:)

SureYWouldntYa · 22-08-2015 10:58PM

ceadaoin. wrote: »

Another woman bashing thread then. When we aren't tricking men into raising another guys child, we're marrying and divorcing just to get some property and money. Sure what other reason would there be for leaving a marriage?

Never mind the "woman bashing"

Fact is more women ask for divorce than men

Fact is women come out a lot better in court proceedings, in terms of finances, property and what happens to the children

Earthhorse · 22-08-2015 11:02PM

ceadaoin. wrote: »

When we aren't tricking men into raising another guys child, we're marrying and divorcing just to get some property and money.

Fair play for admitting it though.

Richard Hillman · 22-08-2015 11:03PM

Men are more likely to become obnoxious slobs in their middle age. Women end up resenting ending up with them.

It also stems from women trying to become their husbands mother or turning their husbands into pet dogs. The male ends up becoming an overgrown child used to being told what to do, where to go, what time to be home by, wear these clothes, handover your wages to pay the bills etc. The lady always ends up resenting their husbands spinelessness.

Colser · 22-08-2015 11:03PM

Junkyard Tom wrote: »

I have no idea if that's true or not but what piques my interest is that it's primarily women who are initiating divorce proceedings which is kind of a big deal. Personally, I wouldn't have to be asked twice.

Why dont you ask? Maybe thats why more women initiate it because men cant be bothered to even do that.

DoYouEvenLift · 22-08-2015 11:12PM

Lol @ even considering marriage as a man these days until the laws are changed, especially regarding children.

Edit: this needn't be a 'woman bashing thread', it should be a marriage laws bashing thread. If the roles were reversed and it was men who came out on top from divorces it'd be naive to think there aren't men who would be just as scummy as the women that take advantage of the privileges these laws provide them.

Links234 · 22-08-2015 11:13PM

ceadaoin. wrote: »

Another woman bashing thread then.

It's seriously getting depressing around here tbh.

FactCheck · 22-08-2015 11:16PM

I seem to be on a quixotic legal fact checking crusade these days, but just so people know - these statistics are totally irrelevant to Ireland.

In Ireland, men initiate 56% of divorces. Those figures are from this July.

It is true that women initiate a significant majority of judicial separations - about 70%. Which is interesting because it suggests that contrary to popular wisdom that the family courts are a hotbed of bias and misandry, men who have been through them once in a judicial separation are in fact more keen than ever to return to divorce.

(Actually I'm being slightly tongue in cheek here - personally I reckon this is all down to men being somehow socialised more to accept and reinforce the status quo, be that marriage or separation - though I don't know how one would prove it beyond some major social science research, which tends to get rubbished on Boards and elsewhere for its lack of rigour!).

brevity · 22-08-2015 11:16PM

I feel like I time travelled back to the 1960's or 70's reading this thread.

Junkyard Tom · 22-08-2015 11:17PM

Colser wrote: »

Why dont you ask? Maybe thats why more women initiate it because men cant be bothered to even do that.

Yep, I'd say you're onto something there. I'd like to think I'd be emotionally intelligent enough to know when it's over long before I need to be told so.

22-08-2015 11:17PM

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

Lol @ even considering marriage as a man these days until the laws are changed, especially regarding children.

What precisely would you change?

Amirani · 22-08-2015 11:17PM

DoYouEvenLift wrote: »

Lol @ even considering marriage as a man these days until the laws are changed, especially regarding children.

The overwhelming majority of women don't set out to screw you, regardless of what incentives the law offers.

efb · 22-08-2015 11:18PM

Hello Divorce, bye bye Daddy! Yawn...

Earthhorse · 22-08-2015 11:20PM

Diego Simeone wrote: »

The overwhelming majority of women don't set out to screw you, regardless of what incentives the law offers.

Tell me about it.

ceadaoin. · 22-08-2015 11:22PM

SureYWouldntYa wrote: »

Never mind the "woman bashing"

Fact is more women ask for divorce than men

Fact is women come out a lot better in court proceedings, in terms of finances, property and what happens to the children

Fact is too that women take more of a financial hit long term after a divorce than men do. It's easier for men to recoup their financial losses when their earning power hasnt been impacted.

Also a fact - These gold digging women that some guys on here seem to be obsessed with are few and far between.

Stheno · 22-08-2015 11:25PM

International research indicates that the more financially independant women are the more likely they are to initiate divorce proceedings

Junkyard Tom · 22-08-2015 11:27PM

Richard Hillman wrote: »

Men are more likely to become obnoxious slobs in their middle age. Women end up resenting ending up with them.

It also stems from women trying to become their husbands mother or turning their husbands into pet dogs. The male ends up becoming an overgrown child used to being told what to do, where to go, what time to be home by, wear these clothes, handover your wages to pay the bills etc. The lady always ends up resenting their husbands spinelessness.

A group of lads weren't seeing 'Bob' any more after he got married. Bob gave the excuse that his wife was a bit demanding. Anyhoo some months down the line Bob and his wife were out at some event and someone jokingly brought up that Bob's wife wouldn't leave out any more. Apparently she lost it saying something like 'is that prick telling ye I'm not leaving him out any more'? Yep, the clown was using his wife as an excuse because he'd consciously retired from his social life in favour of becoming house-bound. Pathetic.

FishOnABike · 22-08-2015 11:35PM

FactCheck wrote: »

I seem to be on a quixotic legal fact checking crusade these days, but just so people know - these statistics are totally irrelevant to Ireland.

In Ireland, men initiate 56% of divorces. Those figures are from this July.

It is true that women initiate a significant majority of judicial separations - about 70%. Which is interesting because it suggests that contrary to popular wisdom that the family courts are a hotbed of bias and misandry, men who have been through them once in a judicial separation are in fact more keen than ever to return to divorce.

The linked article refers to High Court proceedings. Most Judicial Separations and Divorces are conducted through the Circuit Court.

Recently published comprehensive research on Judicial Separation and Divorce in the Circuit Court shows where there are dependent children, women initiate 75% of Judicial Separations and 71% of Divorces in the Circuit Court.

FactCheck · 22-08-2015 11:59PM

FishOnABike wrote: »

The linked article refers to High Court proceedings. Most Judicial Separations and Divorces are conducted through the Circuit Court.

Recently published comprehensive research on Judicial Separation and Divorce in the Circuit Court shows where there are dependent children, women initiate 75% of Judicial Separations and 71% of Divorces in the Circuit Court.

You're referring to that WIT postgrad thesis here? I'd have significant reservations about that on several levels.

The number of men and women initiating divorce has consistently been broadly equal in Ireland since its introduction twenty years ago.

Wives initiate 56% of Circuit Court divorces.

Women more likely to ask for divorce

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