I never get approached by guys??

funnygirl wrote: »

I have done this before and it didn't end well. I just assume if a guy likes a girl he would approach her. My friends get approached by guys without talking to them

Switch the situation around and you'll find out why men don't approach women as often as they'd like, they've been burned too many times.

Also, just because your friends get approached by guys without talking to them doesn't mean there's something wrong with you or you're ugly.

People generally act a lot more confident when out if they already have a boyfriend or girlfriend because they're not trying to impress anyone, a lot of the time they don't realise how confident they actually come across so to the opposite sex, that is appealing, confidence in yourself.

Be more proactive if you want to meet men and approach them. You're you, you're not your friends so stop comparing yourself to them. The whole "I'm a girl, therefore I should be approached" attitude possibly comes across as arrogant when you're out and 'expecting' to be approached?

funnygirl wrote: »

I don't expect to be approached when i'm out. I go out to have fun with my friends and by the end i notice no one has approached me.
I am in no way shape or form arrogant. I'm not even that confident myself.

It was a question not an accusation, as in do you unknowingly project an 'arrogance' to deter any possible approaches? Some men can find the whole approaching thing unnerving too you know, hence the reliance upon Dutch courage to do most of their approaching.

OneOfThem wrote: »

Yeah really. And no offense taken. When guys approach girls on a night out its not because they've watched them walk across the dance floor and thought "God, I bet she has the most fascinating views on the Armenian genocide!", it's because they've looked at them and thought "she's hot, I'd like to have sex with her" (doesn't mean that's all they want, but that's what has them walking in your direction), and the sexier a girl is dressed, the more likely they are to think that. Don't have to like it, but it's true.

I'm a guy, and don't agree with this, so I'm not sure where you got this idea that all men find girls more attractive with less attire.

Girls dressed very provocatively (or who are verging on looking slutty) are a massive turn-off for me, and I know I'm not the only one in my group of mates who feels like that.

Ever hear the term 'less is more'? Plenty of guys like myself find that sexiness is not about showing more breast or leg, it's about how they carry themselves, how confident they are, dressing nicely for the occasion, and so on .............. so please don't feel you need to speak for all of us.

I think some of the advice here is really bad. Simply saying "why don't you approach them" doesn't help and she's already explained she is not confident enough...maybe she is shy, etc. It doesn't answer the op's question at all.

As for saying she should dress provactively....eh...no this is really bad advice. Obviously looking good helps but most of the girls I've met in bars and clubs were actually dressed quite casually. The OP should dress how she feels comfortable and confident.

As a shy guy who has tired to overcome it I find it easier to approach girls if:

1) she seems friendly...smiling etc. Obviously if she smiles in my direction its a good indicator.

2) laid back environments....nightclubs and many late night bars can be too crowded and too loud to talk to someone. Sometimes I wish I smoked because smoking areas are good for this.

3)she is part of a small group (for example just her and her friend).... It's very intimidating to approach someone in a big group. It's also quite easy to say hello to a woman at the bar when getting drink (usually not very successful for me though)

Check out where your friends are when they are approached....have they broken away from the group for a bit...are they at the bar or smoking area? That's probably the easiest thing to examine. If you always stay with the large group guys won't have the confidence to talk to you because of the humiliation if he is rejected.

Hope that helps

Right now you seems a little desperate and most guys would just take advantage of that.
Plus with dating i believe theres a cycle, you form hard to get guys chase, you push they pull, e.t.c

You do not have to start making eye contact with every bill and john.
Just place youself in position to be asked out. Also it possible you are prettier than all your friends, a natural mans brain is wired to go for the easier kill.
Try being are places alone or taking a stroll alone no friend just you alone.
And also you could consider joining a gym. with more male members than females.
Goodluck