Tom Doorley - food critic, wine expert, bluffer.

buck65 · 05-02-2015 05:10PM #1

Tom is hilarious on the Restaurant. He really hasn't a clue but looks at his colleagues for hints about what he is eating.

On last night's programme he actually commented that it was the best desert ever even though he didn't eat it! Just watched some nobody celeb orgasming over a doughnut.

Then Tom orgasmed, it was brilliant TV. My question to the wise on aH is how did this guy ever get on telly? The wine expert moniker is even funnier, I swear one of these days he is going to say a red is white - he is that clueless.

It is car crash telly watching this guy, totally fun but really what's the story! Fair play to him, nice bunts I'm sure.

Baggy Trousers · 05-02-2015 05:11PM

Mainly bluffer.

valoren · 05-02-2015 05:12PM

I prefer Spoofer.

lee_baby_simms · 05-02-2015 05:12PM

He's no Jay Rayner.

tayto lover · 05-02-2015 05:13PM

Good job he's not in politics as he'd have competition.

Slattsy · 05-02-2015 05:13PM

buck65 wrote: »

Tom is hilarious on the Restaurant. He really hasn't a clue but looks at his colleagues for hints about what he is eating.

On last night's programme he actually commented that it was the best desert ever even though he didn't eat it! Just watched some nobody celeb orgasming over a doughnut.

Then Tom orgasmed, it was brilliant TV. My question to the wise on aH is how did this guy ever get on telly? The wine expert moniker is even funnier, I swear one of these days he is going to say a red is white - he is that clueless.

It is car crash telly watching this guy, totally fun but really what's the story! Fair play to him, nice bunts I'm sure.

You answered it yourself.

The Backwards Man · 05-02-2015 05:13PM

Never seen that show, sounds like I'm missing something monumental.

Mr Freeze · 05-02-2015 05:15PM

Food Critics on TV in general come across as the most pretentious sickeners.

As bad as the main critics are on the show, the normal people in the restaurant eating are even worse as they comment on the wine and each dish, nitpicking at the most minimal of things and giving really poor star ratings when they leave.

buck65 · 05-02-2015 05:15PM

The Backwards Man wrote: »

Never seen that show, sounds like I'm missing something monumental.

Ah tis great, Tom makes it though. I think Paulo has passed away , he's gone quiet. A bit like the bird in Ace Ventura.

buck65 · 05-02-2015 05:17PM

Mr Freeze wrote: »

Food Critics on TV in general come across as the most pretentious sickeners.

As bad as the main critics are on the show, the normal people in the restaurant eating are even worse as they comment on the wine and each dish, nitpicking at the most minimal of things and giving really poor star ratings when they leave.

There was a great couple of buffs there last night. Pure country in for the night but good fun.

SEPT 23 1989 · 05-02-2015 05:17PM

God darnit, Mr. Doorley, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore

The Backwards Man · 05-02-2015 05:17PM

buck65 wrote: »

Ah tis great, Tom makes it though. I think Paulo has passed away , he's gone quiet. A bit like the bird in Ace Ventura.

Courtney Cox?

Firefox11 · 05-02-2015 05:18PM

valoren wrote: »

I prefer Spoofer.

I prefer fluffer.

John_Rambo · 05-02-2015 05:19PM

It's a bit of fun. Love the punters slating the food for their imagined wrongs.

DublinCJM · 05-02-2015 05:20PM

He was in a pub near me one Sunday for brunch, and called them over, told them who he was, and then told them his sausages were too hot, and sent it back. I mean what do they do about that? Put the brunch under a hot plate to keep warm while the sausages cool down to Tom Doorleys acceptable heat level for sausages. GTFO.

Just wanted a free fry up.

jimgoose · 05-02-2015 05:20PM

That place does be full of bluffers who wouldn't know shít from the shovel t'was served on. Paulo Tullio is not entirely ignorant of the culinary arts, but it makes me want to throw things at the television when he's introduced as "our Italian food critic!". Is that right. I had an Italian car once, does this mean he's likely to calve about half-way through the meal while pissing fluid everywhere?

buck65 · 05-02-2015 05:22PM

jimgoose wrote: »

That place does be full of bluffers who wouldn't know shít from the shovel t'was served on. Paulo Tullio is not entirely ignorant of the culinary arts, but it makes me want to throw things at the television when he's introduced as "our Italian food critic!". Is that right. I had an Italian car once, does this mean he's likely to calve about half-way through the meal while pissing fluid everywhere?

Well he certainly looks a bit sheepish.

chrysagon · 05-02-2015 05:22PM

himself and the italian bluff... all they do is eat eat eat.. eat to live, or like them live to eat...

and they cant join obesity anon!!

buck65 · 05-02-2015 05:23PM

DublinCJM wrote: »

He was in a pub near me one Sunday for brunch, and called them over, told them who he was, and then told them his sausages were too hot, and sent it back. I mean what do they do about that? Put the brunch under a hot plate to keep warm while the sausages cool down to Tom Doorleys acceptable heat level for sausages. GTFO.

Just wanted a free fry up.

Tom is obviously working on his art so. Hot and cold were covered in last weeks class, next week sweet and sour.

super_furry · 05-02-2015 05:29PM

That show is appalling, typical low-rent TV3 rubbish. It's like an hour long advert for Aldi

Mr Freeze · 05-02-2015 05:31PM

buck65 wrote: »

There was a great couple of buffs there last night. Pure country in for the night but good fun.

They were probably the easiest ones listen to.

buck65 · 05-02-2015 05:31PM

Aldi, yeah , the wine arrived in an Aldi box. Come on, Aldi sell cheap plonk that's fine if you're a ****ing pleb but serving that in a restaurant like the Wineport?
Come to think of it Doorley wouldn't know the difference...either would I.

murpho999 · 05-02-2015 05:33PM

jimgoose wrote: »

That place does be full of bluffers who wouldn't know shít from the shovel t'was served on. Paulo Tullio is not entirely ignorant of the culinary arts, but it makes me want to throw things at the television when he's introduced as "our Italian food critic!". Is that right. I had an Italian car once, does this mean he's likely to calve about half-way through the meal while pissing fluid everywhere?

eh...Paulio Tullio is Italian though.

suicide_circus · 05-02-2015 05:36PM

Barstewards the lot of them

Philo Beddoe · 05-02-2015 05:38PM

buck65 wrote: »

The wine expert moniker is even funnier, I swear one of these days he is going to say a red is white - he is that clueless.

All wine experts are bluffers.

jimgoose · 05-02-2015 05:39PM

murpho999 wrote: »

eh...Paulio Tullio is Italian though.

I know that. What annoys me is the need to point it out, as if that meant something in the context of food criticism.

buck65 · 05-02-2015 05:43PM

I just assumed he was there to critique the Italian food! I thought that was why he was so quiet as there wasn't any.

somesoldiers · 05-02-2015 05:57PM

buck65 wrote: »

Aldi, yeah , the wine arrived in an Aldi box. Come on, Aldi sell cheap plonk that's fine if you're a ****ing pleb but serving that in a restaurant like the Wineport?
Come to think of it Doorley wouldn't know the difference...either would I.

Aldi sponsor the show.

They don't do the "oooh I think this is a New World" bit with the wine any more maybe because they never get it right. Now, it seems the celeb has bottles send to their home from Aldi and they (or their rock star boyfirend if they are tee total) select a red and a white from those, then everyone gets a sniff on the way in. Unsure if it is actually served with the meals- must be right pish

As for Tom, did he and Brendan O'Connor have a fight?

buck65 · 05-02-2015 05:59PM

somesoldiers wrote: »

Aldi sponsor the show. The don't do the "oooh I think this is a New World" bit with the wine any more maybe because they never get it right. The celeb has bottles send to their home and they or the'r rock star boyfirend) if they are tee total) select the wines, then everyone gets a sniff on the way in. unsure if it is actually served with the meals- must be right pish

Yeah I saw that last night. I used to enjoy Doorley making a fool of himself with the wine but it just got embarrassing. The Aldi stuff is probably unrecognisable anyway - like turps with burps.

Putin · 05-02-2015 06:02PM

buck65 wrote: »

Tom Doorley - food critic, wine expert, bluffer

In summary - a chancer. I mean what adult actually needs somebody to tell them what is and isn't nice.

murpho999 · 05-02-2015 06:03PM

buck65 wrote: »

I just assumed he was there to critique the Italian food! I thought that was why he was so quiet as there wasn't any.

AFAIK he is recoveriing or being treated for Cancer. So he may not be himself.

I've heard him talking before on Sean Moncrieff show on Newstalk (Who happens to narrate "The Restaurant") and he's very entertaining and interesting.

Tom Doorley - food critic, wine expert, bluffer.

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