Mail order brides

Love how Irish people automatically assume an Asian bride is a mail order one.

I recently watched a documentary hosted by Jodie Marsh about it.

She met a couple who were married as part of a mail order bride deal. They ran a mail order bride business together now.

So basically men pay and they went over to the Ukraine where they did a kind of speed dating thing with Ukrainian women. the women and men then mark on a sheet which men they would possibly go on a date with. The men only have like two days on the trip to click and find a bride.

One man was in his 50's a bit slimy. Said the reason he wanted a mail order bride was because American Women were basically too independent and he wanted a more 'traditional wife'. It was a bit ugh when he was slow dancing and oogling a 20 something year old woman who clearly did not want to be there.

Another man who was in his 60's had been divorced 3 times said he couldn't find a woman so this was another try. He said that he felt uncomfortable because the only women available to him were in their early 20s. Another man in the group said to him 'that's great sure youl get 15 - 20 years with her' and he said that it wasn't just him he was concerned about but the girl. What would happen her. I think he knew that there was no way she was really interested him.

Another guy was from wales. He seemed kind of shy and socially awkard. He met a girl and I think they stayed in contact.

Another weird guy who was young and not bad looking but there was something off about him. He proposed to a woman on the weekend trip after meeting her just twice and they were set to get married.

She then interviewed some of the Ukrainian women. We seen their homes, how they lived and why they wanted to get out of Ukraine. Basically they were on a mission to get out at the cost of giving up finding real love and settling for an arrangement and better lifestyle. There was something sad about that.

There's also something kind of selfish on both sides. The man and the woman are together for their own needs.

She interviewed a mail order couple who seemed very happy. He was in his 50s and she was in her 30s same age as his son. They seemed genuinely in love.

She interviewed a woman who had married a man who switched the minute they married. He became controlling and abusive. She left him and he stalked her. He ended up shot and killed by the police I think. She went on with her life but was traumatised. it seemed he thought he owned her.

I suppose it can work and maybe love can develop between two people but I would say that this is rare. I think it is definitely a business arrangement which is kind of sad to me but if it works then each to their own.

Grayson wrote: »

I think I saw the dame documentary. People think it's horrible but arranged marriages have been around for centuries. In a lot of countries you barely meet the bride before you get married.

I knew an arab girl who knew she was going to have an arranged marriage someday. She was ok with it. Her view was that romance is a very western idea and the arranged marriage was more practical. Her family would pick someone nice and they would build a family together.

When you see how the Ukrainian women live, some in what we would consider abject poverty, you can see the attraction in an arranged marriage. Romance is all well and good but when your option if you stay is Oleg the tanners son (Who isn't that great a catch) and abject poverty, you can see the attraction in trying to find some nice foreigner who'll take care of you.

yea I agree in some cases it can work. And some people are living so badly that they wouldn't ever have a romance or happy ending as such anyway because their life is so miserable due to poverty.

My main issue is the expectation.

It seemed to me on that documentary that a good few of the men wanted submissive women and I feel that with mail order brides there is a risk of the woman being objectified since she is essentially bought.