Best nickname youve heard?

shaneon77 · 17-12-2014 09:27PM

I worked with a pastry chef who was gay and from the Philippines, Much to his dislike I named him Feelapenis.

Brendan Flowers · 17-12-2014 09:33PM

The footballer Kiki Musampa is nicknamed "Chris Musampa"

cjpm · 17-12-2014 09:35PM

Fella from Glengarriff got 55 points in his Leaving Cert. Known locally as Britvic

joe stodge · 17-12-2014 09:43PM

Jon_459 wrote: »

Electrician I know is called the "prince of darkness"

I used to work with one very close to retirement known as "Jurassic sparks".

Menas · 17-12-2014 09:46PM

Buddy of ours is an accountant to some dodgy types.
We call him Dirty Books.

joe stodge · 17-12-2014 09:46PM

Lad with a stutter used to go out with a girl with a huge under bite when I was a teen, they we're known as "chindler's lisp".

corner of hells · 17-12-2014 09:52PM

joe stodge wrote: »

I used to work with one very close to retirement known as "Jurassic sparks".

Im an electrician and we had a pair of identical twin apprentices nicknamed "phase and neutral" , a few years later their younger brother became an apprentice and gained the nickname "earth".

My favourite nickname was for another electrician , forever known as "flashbang".

joe stodge · 17-12-2014 09:59PM

corner of hells wrote: »

Im an electrician and we had a pair of identical twin apprentices nicknamed "phase and neutral" , a few years later their younger brother became an apprentice and gained the nickname "earth".

My favourite nickname was for another electrician , forever known as "flashbang".

There was another lad called the "conduit king" because he was ****e are any type of conduit, he came to work one monday complaining of this girl he'd gotten off with over the weekend.
He said "no matter what i done she just lay there silent, it was like riding a bag if potatoes. She was ****". To which one of the lads said "maybe you were ****e", he was then known as the "mattress king".

dubscottie · 17-12-2014 10:08PM

Lad at local council in Scotland was called Davie Dig Deep as he was well known for sticking the back bucket of his JCB through cables/pipes etc.

Lad in the local called Dulux as he only seems to have one coat.

Collapsible Brian.. But wont go into how he got that one..

myshirt · 17-12-2014 10:17PM

13 year old chap who had a bad day at school.

Thereafter known as 'Curryshorts Kelly'.

BattleCorp · 18-12-2014 01:53PM

A guy I know got lucky one time with the local copper's daughter.

She gave him a handjob but he came very very very quickly. She told a few friends who told a few friends who told a few friends and eventually we found out.

He became known as Jimmy Two Stroke from then on.

Another guy is called Brillo,

shifts all sorts of dirt.

Rob Thomas · 18-12-2014 01:58PM

Rugby player John Eales was nicknamed "Nobody".

Because Nobody's Perfect.

Plenty of big landowners in west of ireland nicknamed Yorkie.

Big, thick and rich.

Salvation Tambourine · 18-12-2014 01:58PM

Baldy Conscience wrote: »

Mate of mine was called chickenwings.

He performed oral sex on a female who was menstruating, and afterwards looked like he'd been consuming BBQ Wings.

Have one similiar, same story but he was called "The Count", as in Count Dracula.

mark_jmc · 18-12-2014 02:08PM

guy in work is called ankles,

he is usually so far up the bosses hole you can only see his ankles

recylingbin · 18-12-2014 02:09PM

Lad I know with a peg leg, buck teeth, bad acne, one testicle and bad facial birthmark is nicknamed Jack.
Cos his name is John.

fleet_admiral · 18-12-2014 02:12PM

I have heard loads over the years from working in pubs, Square brains being a great one for a fella who couldn't pick his nose when it came to winning on the horses

gerrybbadd · 18-12-2014 02:19PM

Mate of mine was christened Wrong Mouth, because he used to make some ridiculously incorrect statements.

Another fella I know was called Ten to 2, because of his deformed feet, that looked like they were pointed to that time of the clock.

MaroonAndGreen · 19-12-2014 02:33AM

Cesar Azpilicueta who plays for Chelsea. Players called him "Dave" from his first day at the club.

Brilliant I think.

AgileMyth · 19-12-2014 03:48AM

Lad born missing three fingers on his right hand. He's called 'Clock'.

Cause he has one big hand, and one little hand.

barney 20v · 19-12-2014 03:54AM

One I know- friend of a friend --- called "pot hole" cause everyone try's to avoid him .

Useful.Idiot · 19-12-2014 03:55AM

don't know the reasoning behind the name but a mate told me before one of his mates was called "Crappy Bags". An unfortunate nickname in any case.

buyer95 · 19-12-2014 03:56AM

Theres a set of brothers in my town who are in their 50's. Their family caries a knickname, with all the knicknames including "dick." The brothers as a group are known as "the dicks." There is Seán "Big Dick," Jimmy "Hairy Dick" Tadhg "Old Dick." I **** you not.

barney 20v · 19-12-2014 03:57AM

Another lad with one leg a good bit shorter than the other - noticible limp, the lads call him "skateboard" cause if you see him walking past a window it looks like he's on a skateboard
I love that one.

Summer wind · 19-12-2014 04:01AM

A fella who used to drink in the same pub as my friends was known as Klingon cos if you said hello to him he'd stay beside you all night.

pebbles21 · 19-12-2014 04:22AM

A lad i know from years back was called "Killer"...because his mother died giving birth to him!

Savage Tyrant · 19-12-2014 04:40AM

Lad nearby is called Danny "No Hand" as one of his arms has a stump instead of a hand....
His nickname was well established before I ever knew him, but apparently my suggestion that he should in fact be called Danny "One Hand" is entirely out of the question and not open to debate...

square ball · 19-12-2014 05:18AM

Billy Twelvetrees an English rugby players nickname is 36. Makes me laugh every time I hear his name.

mass_debater · 19-12-2014 08:09AM

There's a fella at home called Weetabix because he's as dry as fcuk.

Another guy called Danny Fanny as he has 9 daughters, no sons

Turtyturd · 19-12-2014 10:00AM

Lad in school was losing his hair so one of the teachers started calling him 'Mr Morehead' as in more head than hair.

Was also one on here before about an indian lad who got an erection while playing in goal during PE and became known as Packie Boner.

OldBean · 19-12-2014 10:03AM

I know a guy whose legs have been paralysed since birth. He's quite happily known as Bosco.

Best nickname youve heard?

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