Are People Getting Engaged for the Sake Of Getting Engaged These Days.

Gannicus · 11-10-2014 11:39AM #1

A quasi-mate of mine got engaged recently but to be honest I don't care at all. The reason being is, this is his 4th time getting engaged in about 5 or 6 years. Now I know people may say he's clingy or has abandonment issues and I'd be inclined to agree except for one thing. I know a few of people who have been engage multiple times.

1. This guy (4th Engagement)
2. Girl I casually hang out with (3 times single now)
3. Girl I regularly hang out with (Engaged twice broke up with second guy, got back with him not engaged now)
4. Close male friend engaged twice now single
5. Girl in work engaged 3 times (still engaged with last guy 4 years now)
6. A mates brother and his missus, engaged twice each but not yet to each other

All of this is among a slew of others I know and work with that are just perpetually engaged.

Now before anyone asks their age or family background they are all under 30 (eldest is 28) they come from all walks (parents still married, single parents and divorced parents etc) not gonna say who is what as they may recognize themselves in the post.

So I am asking exactly what the title says:

Are People Getting Engaged for the Sake Of Getting Engaged These Days?

Canis Lupus · 11-10-2014 11:49AM

People need to do it to get facebook likes.

kneemos · 11-10-2014 11:51AM

Sorry,no interest.

oppenheimer1 · 11-10-2014 11:52AM

Gannicus wrote: »

A quasi-mate of mine got engaged recently but to be honest I don't care at all. The reason being is, this is his 4th time getting engaged in about 5 or 6 years. Now I know people may say he's clingy or has abandonment issues and I'd be inclined to agree except for one thing. I know a few of people who have been engage multiple times.

1. This guy (4th Engagement)
2. Girl I casually hang out with (3 times single now)
3. Girl I regularly hang out with (Engaged twice broke up with second guy, got back with him not engaged now)
4. Close male friend engaged twice now single
5. Girl in work engaged 3 times (still engaged with last guy 4 years now)
6. A mates brother and his missus, engaged twice each but not yet to each other

All of this is among a slew of others I know and work with that are just perpetually engaged.

Now before anyone asks their age or family background they are all under 30 (eldest is 28) they come from all walks (parents still married, single parents and divorced parents etc) not gonna say who is what as they may recognize themselves in the post.

So I am asking exactly what the title says:

Are People Getting Engaged for the Sake Of Getting Engaged These Days?

I think it's just the age you're at tbh. That said the traditional 9 month engagement has gone out the window these days. Many are several years in order for the couple to splash out on a big day, which is madness.

The length of the engagements is another reason why so many of these fail.

fonecrusher1 · 11-10-2014 11:54AM

I'm getting a chinese takeaway tonight.

dgt · 11-10-2014 11:59AM

Engaged lets others know you are in the toilet

anncoates · 11-10-2014 12:00PM

I thought a quasi mate would jump at the chance to ring the bells

Packrat · 11-10-2014 12:00PM

Gannicus wrote: »

A quasi-mate of mine got engaged recently but to be honest I don't care at all. The reason being is, this is his 4th time getting engaged in about 5 or 6 years. Now I know people may say he's clingy or has abandonment issues and I'd be inclined to agree except for one thing. I know a few of people who have been engage multiple times.

1. This guy (4th Engagement)
2. Girl I casually hang out with (3 times single now)
3. Girl I regularly hang out with (Engaged twice broke up with second guy, got back with him not engaged now)
4. Close male friend engaged twice now single
5. Girl in work engaged 3 times (still engaged with last guy 4 years now)
6. A mates brother and his missus, engaged twice each but not yet to each other

All of this is among a slew of others I know and work with that are just perpetually engaged.

Now before anyone asks their age or family background they are all under 30 (eldest is 28) they come from all walks (parents still married, single parents and divorced parents etc) not gonna say who is what as they may recognize themselves in the post.

So I am asking exactly what the title says:

Are People Getting Engaged for the Sake Of Getting Engaged These Days?

Here's an idea: Stop worrying yourself about other people's relationships.

None of your business tbh.

CaptainInsano · 11-10-2014 12:05PM

Packrat wrote: »

Here's an idea: Stop worrying yourself about other people's relationships.

None of your business tbh.

Calm down.

anncoates · 11-10-2014 12:07PM

Packrat wrote: »

Here's an idea: Stop worrying yourself about other people's relationships.

None of your business tbh.

AH needs to renamed to Things We Are Too Hypocritical And Cowardly To Say To Our Facebook Friends.

11-10-2014 12:10PM

I only know one person who has been engaged multiple times. He was engaged when he was in his early 20s and they split. He's getting married next year and has two children with his fiancé.

Other than that, I don't know of anyone who has been engaged more than once.

A good chunk of my close friends are married to people who they met when they were quite young. Most are very happily married too which is nice.

Gannicus · 11-10-2014 12:13PM

Packrat wrote: »

Here's an idea: Stop worrying yourself about other people's relationships.

None of your business tbh.

I'm not worried. I'm just really curious thats the reason I started this thread. just like SOO many other threads on boards.

wretcheddomain · 11-10-2014 12:13PM

For many people, it's considered the fashionable thing to do - they're more in-tune with that rather than the meaning of the relationship itself. Hence why the relationship tends to sour and they get engaged yet again within the next 18 months. It's like a desperate attempt to keep hold of someone, and if you say you're "engaged", it's like a mark of permanency. Though, as I've just described, due to its prevailing fashionable nature, things inevitably break down and the permanency is revealed as an illusion of sorts. Getting married these days, on the other hand (for many), is almost a parody event of trying to impress others as much as possible.

CaptainInsano · 11-10-2014 12:20PM

anncoates wrote: »

AH needs to renamed to Things We Are Too Hypocritical And Cowardly To Say To Our Facebook Friends.

I think it should be called 'The Leaving of Sh1t Comments on Threads That We Supposedly Have No Interest In Contributing To, To Get Thanks Forum.'
It rolls off the tongue better.

wretcheddomain · 11-10-2014 12:25PM

CaptainInsano wrote: »

I think it should be called 'The Leaving of Sh1t Comments on Threads That We Supposedly Have No Interest In Contributing To, To Get Thanks Forum.'
It rolls off the tongue better.

Thanks for demonstrating its supposed truth. :rolleyes:

corner of hells · 11-10-2014 12:27PM

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

I'm getting a chinese takeaway tonight.

Me too and I got a new razor , it's silvery.

my teapot is orange · 11-10-2014 12:45PM

anncoates wrote: »

AH needs to renamed to Things We Are Too Hypocritical And Cowardly To Say To Our Facebook Friends.

Hypocritical?

kneemos · 11-10-2014 12:47PM

my teapot is orange wrote: »

Hypocritical?

To criticise or denigrate Hypos.

anncoates · 11-10-2014 12:48PM

my teapot is orange wrote: »

Hypocritical?

Every second thread in here seems to allude to some supposed twat on somebody's Facebook. Nobody's problem but their own. Don't be friends with them so

my teapot is orange · 11-10-2014 12:50PM

kneemos wrote: »

To criticise or denigrate Hypos.

"behaving in a way that suggests one has higher standards or more noble beliefs than is the case."

Are we accusing the OP of having had multiple engagements on the sly?

11-10-2014 12:52PM

my teapot is orange wrote: »

"behaving in a way that suggests one has higher standards or more noble beliefs than is the case."

Are we accusing the OP of having had multiple engagements on the sly?

I think what anncoates means is that people are using social media (boards) to bitch about people on social media (Facebook).

my teapot is orange · 11-10-2014 12:53PM

Deleted User wrote: »

I think what anncoates means is that people are using social media (boards) to bitch about people on social media (Facebook).

Fine and that's either being cowardly or being polite depending on your point of view, but it's in no way hypocritical.

11-10-2014 12:55PM

my teapot is orange wrote: »

Fine and that's either being cowardly or being polite depending on your point of view, but it's in no way hypocritical.

Well it is bit, if they're using one source of social media to say that social media is the divil itself.

Cyber Ghost · 11-10-2014 12:55PM

There are inheritance and tax benefits to getting married but surely in this day and age that's discrimination against single or co-habiting people

Cyber Ghost · 11-10-2014 12:57PM

Ps: I'm getting married cause I don't want my kids to be little bastards

my teapot is orange · 11-10-2014 12:59PM

Deleted User wrote: »

Well it is bit, if they're using one source of social media to say that social media is the divil itself.

Social media is just a tool for communicating. It's not the action itself. That's like saying I can never criticize anything anyone ever says if I am in the habit of speaking myself. I can never criticize a publication, if I like to write myself. The link between the two things is so tenuous it's ridiculous.

anncoates · 11-10-2014 01:01PM

It's what whoopsadaisydoodles said for sure but it's also the relentless denigration of people you know for fairly innocuous lifestyle choices behind their backs on places like here for the purposes of getting good whingey threads going to impress strangers.

Buona Fortuna · 11-10-2014 01:02PM

fonecrusher1 wrote: »

I'm getting a chinese takeaway tonight.

Great idea - I might too. Was genna be pizzas but no Chinese the real deal

Nomnomnom

indigo twist · 11-10-2014 01:02PM

Cyber Ghost wrote: »

Ps: I'm getting married cause I don't want my kids to be little bastards

Seriously ...?

anncoates · 11-10-2014 01:03PM

I'm leaning toward a lamb bhuna tonight myself.

11-10-2014 01:03PM

indigo twist wrote: »

Seriously ...?

I don't think marriage will stop his kids being little bastards :pac:

Are People Getting Engaged for the Sake Of Getting Engaged These Days.

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