Trivial things that annoy you Part 43

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 25-09-2014 01:55AM

Anyone else find it hard concentrating? I'm trying to count sheep, it goes well for the first 3 sheep then I'm thinking about pigs and cows, and for some reason that "we are the cheeky girls we are the cheeky girls" song gets stuck in my head

1 sheep
2 sheep
3 sheep
And a pig
And a baby piglet
And two cows
Old mac Donald had a farm
Ect ect

Doesn't work!

Ihatecuddles · 25-09-2014 07:57AM

Someone in the Unislim chatroom asked how to poach eggs in the microwave, I said crack them into bowl, pierce the yolk and put in microwave for 3 minutes, then another minute if not done. Someone else said don't bother piercing the yolks, so today I tried it without piercing them.

3 minutes later the microwave door shoots open with a massive bang, there's egg everywhere. Now the microwave won't work. I can't even get it to turn on.

My ovaries also feel like they are being stabbed. Someone please come over with some breakfast for me

franer1970 · 25-09-2014 08:05AM

Pedestrian (zebra) crossings built on top of XXL speed bumps. Drivers are focusing all their attention on slowing down by the minimum amount and none on the possibility that they'll have to stop altogether to let someone cross.

franer1970 · 25-09-2014 08:10AM

"Touch free" soap dispensers - I'm about to wash my hands with your fantastic germ-annihilating soap, so why would it matter if I touch some part of an allegedly dirty dispenser?
Concentrate on making a touch free door handle so I can get out of the jax.

Boom_Bap · 25-09-2014 09:25AM

LynnGrace wrote: »

What is it you are smoking ?

I smoke Menthol cigarettes :eek:

And I don't smoke that much either, maybe 1 or 2 in the evening outside the house, and a few during the working day.

Last night, Winnie The Pooh made another appearance.

LynnGrace · 25-09-2014 09:27AM

Boom_Bap wrote: »

I smoke Menthol cigarettes :eek:

And I don't smoke that much either, maybe 1 or 2 in the evening outside the house, and a few during the working day.

Just kidding Boom_Bap

OldNotWIse · 25-09-2014 10:02AM

A woman I just interacted with smells of sudocream. I can only imagine what she has going on :eek:

Vel · 25-09-2014 10:12AM

Boom_Bap wrote: »

I smoke Menthol cigarettes :eek:

Me too, but I never see naked women playing with themselves when I smoke them. Mores the pity!!

Duck Soup · 25-09-2014 10:41AM

Something that's always bothered me - and it's particularly prevalent on Facebook - is people saying "God bless our troops."

Really? If God is up there at all, do you think he's picking sides on the latest round of two countries trying to kill each other? Do you think God believes your cause more righteous? Your sons and daughters more valuable?

Do you think that the other side is populated by mustache-twirling baddies who say things like "I'm evil and I like it" or do they also love their family and friends and want a peaceful, better life for them.

Do you think their children are any less dead when you bomb them than yours are when they bomb you?

By all means, kill the shíte out of each other, protect your interests, but don't put an "As Approved By God" sticker on it.

deise08 · 25-09-2014 10:42AM

That I got congratulated by a woman yesterday for cutting the grass.
Her husband does theirs apparently.

Yes I'm a girl.
Yes I can turn a lawnmower on.
Yes I can push it up and down the garden.

shock horror!

I'm single. I live on my own. I can't afford a gardener. Fcuk you! ! *

*Needless to say I didn't say any of this to her. I just screamed it at her in my head.

Boom_Bap · 25-09-2014 10:46AM

Vel wrote: »

Me too, but I never see naked women playing with themselves when I smoke them. Mores the pity!!

Minty's Unite!

My annoyance today. In the game of musical beds that takes place in my house, it ended up with me and my 3 year old daughter in my bed.
At one stage during the night, my 6 year old son was there as well, but by morning he was gone.

The first thing the girl says to me is 'Daddy, my brother took a wee wee in the bed.'

Great, so the little git came in, took a p*ss, then left allowing soakage to take it's natural course. Then the first thing i have to do is peel p*ss sheets of the bed, get them into the wash and throw out the matress topper.

Pumpkinseeds · 25-09-2014 11:15AM

I have had a Urinary tract infection for 3 days now and I feel like crap. Wish the antibiotics would kick in, I miss my walks.:(

Fat Christy · 25-09-2014 11:26AM

Pumpkinseeds wrote: »

I have had a Urinary tract infection for 3 days now and I feel like crap. Wish the antibiotics would kick in, I miss my walks.:(

It's a fcuking killer!!! I had one once and I'll never forget it. I was running to the toilet every 5 minutes!

I have been out of work sick the last few days, the doctor wanted me to take the whole week off but I decided to come back in today. I wish I had stayed at home. I can barely talk with my throat and all the fcuking phone calls are being put through to me.

I sent an email around asking everyone to please not send all calls through to me this week, as I'm just back and still sick. My throat is killing me to talk.

I got a 'k' reponse from the secretary. Fcuking 'k'! :mad: I should have stayed in bed!!

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 25-09-2014 11:32AM

Was there a full stop after the k? Bitches mean business when **** goes down with K.

Fat Christy · 25-09-2014 11:34AM

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Was there a full stop after the k? Bitches mean business when **** goes down with K.

Not even a full fcuking stop. Just a K!!

It's not K, Biatch!!:mad: Grrrrr.

jimgoose · 25-09-2014 11:36AM

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Was there a full stop after the k? Bitches mean business when **** goes down with K.

Any day you don't need aK. be a good day. :cool:

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 25-09-2014 11:39AM

jimgoose wrote: »

Any day you don't need aK. be a good day. :cool:

I have no idea what you just said but it still made me smile. Take it HAWNDY noy Jim

Maximus Alexander · 25-09-2014 11:40AM

Fat Christy wrote: »

It's a fcuking killer!!! I had one once and I'll never forget it. I was running to the toilet every 5 minutes!

I have been out of work sick the last few days, the doctor wanted me to take the whole week off but I decided to come back in today. I wish I had stayed at home. I can barely talk with my throat and all the fcuking phone calls are being put through to me.

I sent an email around asking everyone to please not send all calls through to me this week, as I'm just back and still sick. My throat is killing me to talk.

I got a 'k' reponse from the secretary. Fcuking 'k'! :mad: I should have stayed in bed!!

u k bbz? xxx

:pac:

Boom_Bap · 25-09-2014 11:41AM

Theres a manager in another dept in my company that repsonds to mails with

txns

When I glance at it, I always read it as

xxx

That's weird.

K

jimgoose · 25-09-2014 11:42AM

LexieOnRale wrote: »

I have no idea what you just said but it still made me smile. Take it HAWNDY noy Jim

Today I didn't even have to use my A.K. (-47)
I got to say it was a good day

-- Ice Cube, "It Was A Good Day"

Aglomerado · 25-09-2014 11:42AM

deise08 wrote: »

That I got congratulated by a woman yesterday for cutting the grass.
Her husband does theirs apparently.

Yes I'm a girl.
Yes I can turn a lawnmower on.
Yes I can push it up and down the garden.

shock horror!

I'm single. I live on my own. I can't afford a gardener. Fcuk you! ! *

*Needless to say I didn't say any of this to her. I just screamed it at her in my head.

That drives me nuts too. I am also a single woman and live alone. I cut my lawns, clean my own gutters, paint walls, varnish my front door, change tap washers etc. Basic jobs that I do out of necessity but I enjoy them too. No need to patronise me just because I don't have a big strong man living in the house to help me. (I have male friends I can call on for extra help, but I can do most things myself.)

Fat Christy · 25-09-2014 11:43AM

Maximus Alexander wrote: »

u k bbz? xxx

:pac:

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSICqKylXQJVvLLk0T-N7lzIG5_0jo0rAKcYBGIbBmvlvuc1J76CA

Sincerely, from the bottom of my hear, fcuk you. :mad:

EDIT: K? :pac:

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 25-09-2014 11:50AM

Anyone else read the hope you're ok Hun xxxx page?

I've gotten real into typing window as "windrit" like Hun writes it, and then when I try pronounce it, my accent is all wrong and it's just not as deadly as it is written down

jimgoose · 25-09-2014 12:07PM

LexieOnRale wrote: »

Anyone else read the hope you're ok Hun xxxx page?

I've gotten real into typing window as "windrit" like Hun writes it, and then when I try pronounce it, my accent is all wrong and it's just not as deadly as it is written down

Wait a minute, I thought I was supposed to be confusing?!?

jimgoose · 25-09-2014 12:09PM

Yahoo Mail appears to be on its arse all morning and I'm trying to find out about advanced driver testing in Ireland from RoSPA. Annoyed!! :mad:

honeygirl · 25-09-2014 12:34PM

Boom_Bap wrote: »

I smoke Menthol cigarettes :eek:

And I don't smoke that much either, maybe 1 or 2 in the evening outside the house, and a few during the working day.

Last night, Winnie The Pooh made another appearance.

Sounds like your having great fun where you live:D Lots and lots to see!

OldNotWIse · 25-09-2014 12:38PM

Walking in to work this morning. Quite breezy and skirt blowing around a bit. No biggy, I think, sure I have black leggings on underneath. Nobody will see a thing anyway. Couldn't have been more wrong. A quick fix of myself in the lift at work revealed a rather large (and by large I mean pretty much áss sized) hole in said leggings, under which were rather revealing pants.

Shuffling across to the shops later with skirt pegged to leggings, in search of some new ones with a full áss :P

qo2cj1dsne8y4k · 25-09-2014 12:43PM

That happened me one day, I worked in the ifsc, had a uniform, during winter so on the long days (9-9) and a 2hr commute home, if the weather was bad I'd stay in jury's, and then I was only around the corner from work. All going well until this morning when I was so sleepy getting into my trousers, I manager to rip the entire bum out of them. So, I had to walk to Pennies on o'connell street who didn't even open until 9, then back to work, and I was late and had to explain my ass ripping saga to my manager.

Luckily I had a coat that just came below my bum but I was way too paranoid to get the luas.

honeygirl · 25-09-2014 12:43PM

OldNotWIse wrote: »

Walking in to work this morning. Quite breezy and skirt blowing around a bit. No biggy, I think, sure I have black leggings on underneath. Nobody will see a thing anyway. Couldn't have been more wrong. A quick fix of myself in the lift at work revealed a rather large (and by large I mean pretty much áss sized) hole in said leggings, under which were rather revealing pants.

Shuffling across to the shops later with skirt pegged to leggings, in search of some new ones with a full áss :P

I hate when that happens! I went shopping last week and my daughter pointed out a nice revealing rip in my trousers, I had to get my husband to walk behind me till I got to the car. I was shopping for hours so I obviously gave lots of people an eye full.

gugleguy · 25-09-2014 12:50PM

LexieOnRale wrote: »

That happened me one day, I worked in the ifsc, had a uniform, during winter so on the long days (9-9) and a 2hr commute home, if the weather was bad I'd stay in jury's, and then I was only around the corner from work. All going well until this morning when I was so sleepy getting into my trousers, I manager to rip the entire bum out of them. So, I had to walk to Pennies on o'connell street who didn't even open until 9, then back to work, and I was late and had to explain my ass ripping saga to my manager.

Luckily I had a coat that just came below my bum but I was way too paranoid to get the luas.

Couldn't find a tie any tie one day before going to work in Baggot street.circa 1996. Had to be in work for 9 sharp.
The generous proprietor opened his men's shop early just for me. I got into work with the tie on me in the cusp of time.

Trivial things that annoy you Part 43

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