Trivial things that annoy you Part 43

mauzo! wrote: »

There's a girrl in our local Tesco, she's a complete airhead and always chewing gum and being rude in general. She's a really big girl, I'd say at least 18 stone. She has really bad hair extensions and fake tan that looks like muck, her eyebrows are put on with what looks like permanent marker and she has those big hoopy earrings.

Last night my husband tells me he finds her really sexy. This morning he backtracked and said he called her mildly attractive, but he definitely said 'really sexy'.

Christ :mad: I think it only annoyed me because I'm joining unislim to lose weight and look more attractive, when he finds someone like that attractive!!

You've never heard about the overweight, over-caked, hoopy earringed checkout girl fantasy us blokes have?
Oh yeah, you can scan my sausage anytime baby... I love how you pack my bags...oooh yeah, I love your late night opening...

mauzo! wrote: »

Now I feel like getting super fat just to get back at him thats a joke btw

Just be waiting for him one evening when he comes home wearing a Dunnes uniform...

mauzo! wrote: »

Yeah he married me but I'm not allowed be fat, the thoughts of me being sexy seems to baffle him!! Someone out there could possibly want to have sex with me
:eek:

Now I feel like getting super fat just to get back at him thats a joke btw

You should start pointing out the weirdest looking guys and making inappropriate comments about the effect they're having your downstairs department. That should wake him up!

I gots the coffee machine blues. The Blessed Monolith in the upstairs kitchen packed up there last week, and it was finally replaced yesterday. The New Yoke is one of these terribly modern types that looks like an AlienWare minitower, or one of those hideous JVC stereos from around the late '90s, and I have taken a dislike to it already. It finds more and ingenious ways of getting things arseways than the old one ever did, like deciding randomly to fill two mugs worth at a time, missing the cup completely, disappearing off into space for minute on end, etc. I'm told it costs €1,500 to recommission the old machine when it breaks, and something similar to purchase them. At that rate a' knots it'd be cheaper to pay a youngfella to do Barista for an hour or two in the mornings.

We live quite near a corner, where a more major suburban road turns into part of the estate. Maybe because it's such a quiet area, people (young, and old enough to know better) have developed a fierce habit of cutting the corner, coming round it like a rocket nearly on the wrong side of the road, usually with the "Roundabout Girl"-style "what the fúck are you doing there, in my way??" expression on their faces. I've been moaning about this carry-on for years, and of course I might as well be talking to the cat. Well last night there was a youngfella parked, legally, just up from the junction (I'd love to be able to tell you I was sitting on the wall with a straw hat on, mumbling and occasionally falling off, like Monty Python's Village Idiot, but I was finagling with a light-fixture in one of the bedrooms, from who's window I can see the junction) and a young one comes howling around, cutting the corner badly and going way too fast, naturally, in some shítheap Punto or something and of course smacks straight into the parked car. How I laughed! At the tears, the threatening to "get my bifrind!!" and the subsequent legal discussion around parking regulations!

eisenberg1 wrote: »

..."she is attractive, bit in and obvious sort of way";)

:pac::pac::pac: