Your Perfect Pub/Bar

anncoates · 09-09-2014 12:22AM

lufties wrote: »

Each to their own. Some of us like dank boring establishments..others don't

Are you sure you didn't fit in with the Nathan Barleys in Shoreditch?

Awkward Badger · 09-09-2014 12:23AM

lufties wrote: »

diddly eye like?

More just relaxed folky numbers (eg) rather than diddly eye.

recylingbin · 09-09-2014 12:24AM

lufties wrote: »

Nooooooooooo

Yes.

lufties · 09-09-2014 12:25AM

recylingbin wrote: »

Yes.

Guinness? come on read the thread title again.

arybvtcw0eolkf · 09-09-2014 12:27AM

recylingbin wrote: »

You walk in, there's exposed stone all over the place. The bar has two taps. Guinness for men and some lager or other for the ladies.
There's four old lads at the counter, all wearing flat caps and worn tweed jackets complimented by brown pants and shiny shoes. All have the same level of Guinness in their glasses. and there's a few empty whiskey glasses beside the pints. At one of the tables, there's four or five younger old lads talkin about everything and anything. By the open fire, a dishevelled looking oul lad pipes up every now and then, but mainly he drinks quietly and spits in the fire. There's a group of young lads trying to chat up a group of young ones at the far end. And the barman is friendly and chatty while the barmaid is hot and sassy. There's a telly covered in dust. It hasn't been turned on since last year's AI final.
The jacks consist of two urinals and a cubicle that doesn't always have toilet paper in it. Who knows what the ladies is like, but it smells nice when you pass it.
The only food in there is cheese & onion crisps and kp nuts.

Sounds like the type boring kip I'd rather firebomb.

recylingbin · 09-09-2014 12:32AM

lufties wrote: »

Guinness? come on read the thread title again.

My perfect pub.
That's my perfect pub.

I remember my mum telling me a story about a place my dad and her used to go to. They used to drink late and the owner would leave them at it and head up to bed. They'd go into the kitchen and grab a drinkfrom the bar as the arose. One night, they saw a can of gloss paint and a brush on top in the kitchen. They painted all the skirting boards and the door in the kitchen. What they didn't do was move anything out of the way. They even painted around the coats hung on the door :pac:
that was my kinda pub.

thomur · 09-09-2014 12:36AM

trad music, no queue, view to die for from the smoking area

FloatingVoter · 09-09-2014 12:39AM

Free Guinness and Jameson. Ashtrays on the bar. No closing time. Nimrods who need music because they are unable to make conversation are barred.

recylingbin · 09-09-2014 12:41AM

Camille Orange Sample wrote: »

Sounds like the type boring kip I'd rather firebomb.

It's my perfect pub. Obviously you wouldn't be within an asses roar of the place.

chrissb8 · 09-09-2014 12:42AM

A pub with live music but no metal nonsense or overly heavy music. The bands and artists know the pub experience and play accordingly to it. None of this they're looking at each other saying with their body language "we are the tits!" meanwhile most drinkers are just annoyed they can't talk to their mates that they want to have a good catch up with due to the self indulgent crap going on in the background. Sorry. It just can really be annoying.

Anyway. A pub with good comfortable seats. Sofas that you don't sink too much in as I find tis awfully hard to reach that pint or even just getting up to go toilet. A good beer garden is an essential with red fairy lights accosting the picnic benches full of revelers. No garrulous loud obnoxious idiots who think that because they're drunk they are automatically entitled to act the village idiot. A good buzz about the place as well. None of this 5 people in the bar. It's just depressing to look at. No security or at least very discreet security. I don't need a fatso in black walking around eyeing people up. What am I? In a creche? I don't mind security just not when their constantly roaming about being annoying and keeping people uptight so they can't really enjoy themselves.

No tvs. No pool tables. No stupid 18yo who can't keep their s**t together either. Novice drinkers should go to trashy bars if they want to get royally messed up. I'm sure some stupid drink "deal" will quench their thirst. Otherwise nice pints of craft beer. Pack of scampi fries and a nice long tipsy/drunk chat with the friends with a lovely atmosphere.

Bafucin · 09-09-2014 12:43AM

lufties wrote: »

So, having spent the last few months here in London I was excited about visiting Shoreditch,

Lucky bastard!

lufties · 09-09-2014 12:48AM

Bafucin wrote: »

Lucky bastard!

really?

Bafucin · 09-09-2014 12:51AM

lufties wrote: »

really?

Loved shoreditch.

Lyaiera · 09-09-2014 12:53AM

I couldn't have an perfect pub/bar. The kind of place I want to go to depends on the type of night I plan on having. I was in a quiet place over the weekend, DJ playing quiet music, only craft beer from one brewer on tap, tables occupied but room for us, quiet enough place to talk, and they had unisex bathrooms.

The pub I was in tonight I was sitting at the bar, chatting with the bar man and regulars, quiet music, the bar man was fixing one of the regular's laptops and there was a chess game going at the bar.

So like I said, it depends on what I'm looking for.

lufties · 09-09-2014 12:53AM

Bafucin wrote: »

Loved shoreditch.

What did you love about it, where specifically? In fairness it is a monday night, but I couldn't find anywhere that I'd be bothered returning to.

Witchie · 09-09-2014 01:42AM

I have found it.....

http://www.zeitgeistsf.com/

Can't wait to be there next week! Whoop!

Mince Pie · 09-09-2014 02:25AM

Witchie wrote: »

I have found it.....

http://www.zeitgeistsf.com/

Can't wait to be there next week! Whoop!

If you're going to San Fran you need to check this place out as well. Used to be one of my favourite haunts. http://www.vesuvio.com/index2.html

Bafucin · 09-09-2014 02:35AM

lufties wrote: »

What did you love about it, where specifically? In fairness it is a monday night, but I couldn't find anywhere that I'd be bothered returning to.

Zigfrid Von Underbelly. Great mix.

Joe Doe · 09-09-2014 03:55AM

Worst bar ever in was Hurst's old Pharmacy gaf in Notting Hill, full of posers, paid lady hostesses (just pre-paid 'atmosphere enhancing' chit-chat), kitted out like a chemist shop but you couldn't even buy an Aspirin, and a very slow bar service. 2nd worst was the 'purple club' under the Chelsea stadium, £7.80+ for pint o'Gunniess and some local banker type stole me coat.

Ideal:

• Old 8 ball pool tables.
• Open pizza fires & bbq's
• planet-rock type jukebox.
• 100kg benches at the back.
• 50/50 M/F ratio where possible.
• Gunness, water, whisky or Becks beer only.
• A different tribute rock band act every nite.
• Free sp soundrooms at the back with kit and marshalls.
• Complete jam-ban on any wifi/mobile/twatter/fb signals.
• Free local calls from standard retro phone booths if needed.
• No sports nor any tv screens (stay at home or at the stadia).
• Harley D hire on-site (for sobers only, looking to catch bit of air).
• Stand up comedy act in between every few tunes from the band.
• Zip wire outside for speedy exit to kebab house/taxi rank (pub on hilltop).
• On-site crystal chakra healers and reiki massage masters to keep folks chilled.
• Sound recordings of choirs of angels and waterfalls piped into the jacks.
• Bouncers all level 5 qualified chaps in conflict management studies.
• On-site professors of knowledge, philosophy and few wise old men.
• Plastic drinking containers, sure just fling them in corner when done.
• Ban on tracksuit attaire unless you actually won an olympic gold.
• Traffic light night every nite, saves any wasted flirting efforts.
• Bar staff all pretty lady final year sociology major students.

.jacksparrow. · 09-09-2014 07:53AM

The craft beer snobbery is strong in this one.

Ghost Buster · 09-09-2014 08:32AM

No music, no tv, dogs welcome, good stout, toasted hang an calvita sangidges, saw dust, clean smell of Jayes Fluid from the toilets, ladies toilet recently built on as a concession. Bliss.....

anncoates · 09-09-2014 08:34AM

I can't really say what a perfect bar is except that it should have non-wanker clientele and a choice of decent beers.

Sometimes you want an old school quiet place and sometimes it's nice to have somewhere modern with music - as in background music, not overly loud and heaven forbid, no needy cunts doing 'acoustic sets'.

jimgoose · 09-09-2014 08:35AM

Paddy Breen's pub in the village of Kilteely in East Limerick. No TV/radio, a roaring coal fire, pints of pure cream, endless boring stories from the proprietor about the Elder Days, and his wife enforcing policy from behind the bar with an evilly-hooped hurley. Sadly they and their bar are gone.

TheBeardedLady · 09-09-2014 09:01AM

No posers, no tellies, decent music playing, staff that can serve a few customers at a time and aren't hired to simply look good, selection of nice beers and wines, space to dance (but not a dance floor), more than one women's toilet and DARK!

Hoop66 · 09-09-2014 09:16AM

Good friends, good beer. Match on if you want it, but easily avoidable. No loud music, unless there's a band on.

Sounds like my local, now that I think of it.

Micky Dolenz · 09-09-2014 09:22AM

I know of a great place.

Free drinks all night, as much sex as you can take.

I've not been yet but my sisters go all the time.

SEPT 23 1989 · 09-09-2014 09:24AM

No windows/natural light or clocks on the wall

Cerveja69 · 09-09-2014 09:36AM

recylingbin wrote: »

You walk in, there's exposed stone all over the place. The bar has two taps. Guinness for men and some lager or other for the ladies.
There's four old lads at the counter, all wearing flat caps and worn tweed jackets complimented by brown pants and shiny shoes. All have the same level of Guinness in their glasses. and there's a few empty whiskey glasses beside the pints. At one of the tables, there's four or five younger old lads talkin about everything and anything. By the open fire, a dishevelled looking oul lad pipes up every now and then, but mainly he drinks quietly and spits in the fire. There's a group of young lads trying to chat up a group of young ones at the far end. And the barman is friendly and chatty while the barmaid is hot and sassy. There's a telly covered in dust. It hasn't been turned on since last year's AI final.
The jacks consist of two urinals and a cubicle that doesn't always have toilet paper in it. Who knows what the ladies is like, but it smells nice when you pass it.
The only food in there is cheese & onion crisps and kp nuts.

Guinness for the men? Yeah cos women don't drink Guinness :rolleyes:

Shenshen · 09-09-2014 09:53AM

Perfect?

Hmm... good selection of beers, prefereably with a good few I haven't tried before.
Some nice, simple food - with none of it deep fried (cheese boards, filled baguettes, that kind of thing).
Not too dark, not too loud (music or otherwise), and allowing people to play a game of cards if they want to. That would be one of the things I'm missing dearly over here.

Annasopra · 09-09-2014 10:03AM

The Backwards Man wrote: »

No music, no TV, no gimmicks, short line, clean jacks and hand polished glasses (FU health inspector)

This plus a carpeted floor to absorb noise.

Your Perfect Pub/Bar

Comments