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Most cringe worthy thing that ever happened during sex?
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Fat Christy wrote: »That's why you swallow, don't you know? :pac:
He prefers it on my face. Plus I like picking it out of my hair when it's dry. I shower after that though.
That's the most disgusting thing I've ever said. I apologise
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Mariasofia wrote: »Fizzy cola lollipop maybe?? :-D
Are you coming onto me?
No, I wish it was that! Actually, I'm retching just thinking about it.0 -
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Senor Fancy Pants wrote: »Are you coming onto me?
No, I wish it was that! Actually, I'm retching just thinking about it.
you're such a cringe-tease!0 -
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Fat Christy wrote: »Friends with benefits.
Duh
Kinda disappointed really.
The lolly story above reminds me. Years and years ago I was witha girl that really loved chocolate. I've always been able to take or leave it. So her idea was that we'd try a bit of cunnilingus with a bar of dairy milk in her mooey.
There's an obvious flaw in this plan that years of hindsight now seem obvious. She loved chocolate but I could take or leave it and lets face it I was likely to get most of it. Anyway it starts of grand but its not too long before you've had enough chocolate and the thought of more makes you feel nauseous. Meanwhile with the heat she ended up with sticky liquid chocolate in crivices I didn't know existed. We spent the rest of the time trying to clean up before her mum and dad got home.0 -
sleepytrees wrote: »I expect skid marks in the bed when I'm with a guy..
I'd be looking in silence if there wasn't any :P
I love it you sound like a beast that cant be tamed0 -
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I'll probably be hung for this but it was an honest mistake.
This has to go down as one of the biggest misunderstandings in the history of sex but..
I got lucky one night with this gorgeous nordie girl while out on the tear and took her back to mine as you do etc.
Later, we were going at it when she starts coming out with some really filthy stuff, telling me I can cum in her face and that I could f**k her in the em.. rear and just generally really filthy talk.
So, i'm actually pretty shocked at this point. And in my head i'm thinking "Jaysus this is a bit much for the first night isn't it?"
Anyway we keep at it and she starts going "Aw you can slap me if you want, you can slap me if you want" and, "would it turn you on if you slapped me" and all of this. So im kind of a little bit put off to be honest as I thought it was already a bit much for a one night stand.
So on I go, and i'm trying to keep my focus but she keeps on at it "oh go on slap me, you can slap me if you want" and at this point im basically thinking "Well she's obviously mad for the kinky stuff, maybe I should just do it?"
So I up and slapped her across the face with my manliest "Is this what you want is it?"
She immediately just kind of froze and turned her head away. Went dead still.
I realised (obviously) at this point that I had definitely gotten this wrong and just sort of hugged her and said sorry I thought that's what you wanted like... whilst dying inside at what had just happened.
Next morning was interesting to say the least.
Apparently her intention had been for me to just provide a little light spanking. I hadn't obviously full on burst her across the face, it was about the same amount of force that you would spank someone with, but the shock of it had obviously been pretty bad.
Ugh.. Dying just thinking about it. 0 -
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sleepytrees wrote: »Or I'm just a disgusting person
No I love disgustig ppl it makes me feel normal ha ha0 -
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House of Blaze wrote: »I'll probably be hung for this but it was an honest mistake.
This has to go down as one of the biggest misunderstandings in the history of sex but..
I got lucky one night with this gorgeous nordie girl while out on the tear and took her back to mine as you do etc.
Later, we were going at it when she starts coming out with some really filthy stuff, telling me I can cum in her face and that I could f**k her in the em.. rear and just generally really filthy talk.
So, i'm actually pretty shocked at this point. And in my head i'm thinking "Jaysus this is a bit much for the first night isn't it?"
Anyway we keep at it and she starts going "Aw you can slap me if you want, you can slap me if you want" and, "would it turn you on if you slapped me" and all of this. So im kind of a little bit put off to be honest as I thought it was already a bit much for a one night stand.
So on I go, and i'm trying to keep my focus but she keeps on at it "oh go on slap me, you can slap me if you want" and at this point im basically thinking "Well she's obviously mad for the kinky stuff, maybe I should just do it?"
So I up and slapped her across the face with my manliest "Is this what you want is it?"
She immediately just kind of froze and turned her head away. Went dead still.
I realised (obviously) at this point that I had definitely gotten this wrong and just sort of hugged her and said sorry I thought that's what you wanted like... whilst dying inside at what had just happened.
Next morning was interesting to say the least.
Apparently her intention had been for me to just provide a little light spanking. I hadn't obviously full on burst her across the face, it was about the same amount of force that you would spank someone with, but the shock of it had obviously been pretty bad.
Ugh.. Dying just thinking about it.
Jaysus, did ya not watch any porn as a jung fellow? I love a good spanking, just not in the face. :pac:0 -
House of Blaze wrote: »I'll probably be hung for this but it was an honest mistake.
This has to go down as one of the biggest misunderstandings in the history of sex but..
I got lucky one night with this gorgeous nordie girl while out on the tear and took her back to mine as you do etc.
Later, we were going at it when she starts coming out with some really filthy stuff, telling me I can cum in her face and that I could f**k her in the em.. rear and just generally really filthy talk.
So, i'm actually pretty shocked at this point. And in my head i'm thinking "Jaysus this is a bit much for the first night isn't it?"
Anyway we keep at it and she starts going "Aw you can slap me if you want, you can slap me if you want" and, "would it turn you on if you slapped me" and all of this. So im kind of a little bit put off to be honest as I thought it was already a bit much for a one night stand.
So on I go, and i'm trying to keep my focus but she keeps on at it "oh go on slap me, you can slap me if you want" and at this point im basically thinking "Well she's obviously mad for the kinky stuff, maybe I should just do it?"
So I up and slapped her across the face with my manliest "Is this what you want is it?"
She immediately just kind of froze and turned her head away. Went dead still.
I realised (obviously) at this point that I had definitely gotten this wrong and just sort of hugged her and said sorry I thought that's what you wanted like... whilst dying inside at what had just happened.
Next morning was interesting to say the least.
Apparently her intention had been for me to just provide a little light spanking. I hadn't obviously full on burst her across the face, it was about the same amount of force that you would spank someone with, but the shock of it had obviously been pretty bad.
Ugh.. Dying just thinking about it.
Yes, but, did you get to fire on her face in the end ?0 -
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After I gave birth.. I was paranoid about my vagina being the size of the The Bermuda Triangle, told my husband this and so the next time we were messing around.. he decides it would be funny shout at my vagina 'hello hello hello' whilst making an echo sound..
anyway I kicked him in the balls but I did find the funny side later on
We even still had sex, I'm that kinda gal.. 0 -
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Fat Christy wrote: »Jaysus, did ya not watch any porn as a jung fellow? I love a good spanking, just not in the face. :pac:
I wish I had had the wisdom to imagine that most women wouldn't at the time!Yes, but, did you get to fire on her face in the end ?
Unfortunately that was the abrupt end to the evenings activities..
In fairness though she invited me back to hers on the wednesday after and let's just say that all was apparently forgiven... very forgiven! 0
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