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Parents who overindulge their children.

24567

Comments

  • Site Banned Posts: 1,489 ✭✭✭Ralf and Florian


    Right, but you're not supposed to be. :confused: Even if they were loud, you were eavesdropping. They weren't being loud for your benefit.


    I diden't want to be earshot believe me but its hard not to be when your sitting close to someone broadcasting at the top of their voice with no consideration for those around them.


  • Posts: 15,814 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    If i am picking up on the op correctly i too would be fairly annoyed at this, would turn me right off my food, sounds to me he was making a scene for everyone.

    And if it was such an issue then something should have been said. It's like people in the cinema who get annoyed when others talk and won't tell them to be quiet, instead preferring to say nothing, have the experience ruined on them and then run home to post about it on boards.
    So many posters here have missed the point that I wonder why I bothered.I don't think its a particulerly healthy thing for a kid to completly the center of attention all of the time.Kids might want to do their own thing and scribble in a colouring book or play with their toys and not feel smothered with attention from their parents who can't stop talking about them or indulging them for five minuites.

    You don't know that they are smothered with attention all the time. For all you know it could have been the first time the father saw the child in awhile.

    Most kids aren't constantly smothered with attention and to use your example as evidence to say that they are is ridiculous. Without context it's meaningless. The parents may not be together, he may only see his child every few weeks, etc.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 817 ✭✭✭Ann Landers


    So many posters here have missed the point that I wonder why I bothered.I don't think its a particulerly healthy thing for a kid to completly the center of attention all of the time.

    How do you know it's all the time? How long were you in the presence of this couple and their child?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 817 ✭✭✭Ann Landers


    I diden't want to be earshot believe me but its hard not to be when your sitting close to someone broadcasting at the top of their voice with no consideration for those around them.

    So, did you say something to staff? I was at a family do lately where the parents of a 3 year old present were asked to keep him quiet, which they then did with no hassle. So did you do this or decide to wait and bitch about it on a message board later?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,512 ✭✭✭Muise...


    I am pie wrote: »
    I doubt it was that loud to be honest, with a small child? I don't believe that.

    You're just calling the OP a liar, then?
    I diden't want to be earshot believe me but its hard not to be when your sitting close to someone broadcasting at the top of their voice with no consideration for those around them.

    I've experienced this, with people who were not minding children, and with people who were. Some restaurants have really terrible acoustics, but some people don't care who can hear them. It's the risk you take in a public place.


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  • Site Banned Posts: 1,489 ✭✭✭Ralf and Florian


    How do you know it's all the time? How long were you in the presence of this couple and their child?


    Maybe I should have asked them for your benefit.This is just an example.Its a fairly recent phenomenom and pretty widespread.Many parents just can't believe that not everyone shares their fascination for their kids and most of the replies here prove my point.


  • Site Banned Posts: 1,489 ✭✭✭Ralf and Florian


    So, did you say something to staff? I was at a family do lately where the parents of a 3 year old present were asked to keep him quiet, which they then did with no hassle. So did you do this or decide to wait and bitch about it on a message board later?


    Theres more than a hint of bitchiness creeping through in your posts if you don't mind me saying.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 817 ✭✭✭Ann Landers


    Maybe I should have asked them for your benefit.This is just an example.

    A fairly weak example... you need to lead with a better one.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,720 ✭✭✭Sir Arthur Daley


    And if it was such an issue then something should have been said.

    If i was in such a situation i would, time and a place for everything, restaurants are for eating not to be putting up with daddy and his fair city like acting.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 817 ✭✭✭Ann Landers


    Theres more than a hint of bitchiness creeping through in your posts if you don't mind me saying.

    Arrah, there probably is, whatchygonnado?


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 197 ✭✭bodhi085


    It's called interacting with you're child. Forming a bond between father and child.
    Would a post be put up if you was in the restaurant and the parents just gave the child a Nintendo ds and sat looking at each other not saying a word. Would that have bothered more? People are very quick to judge poor parenting but now to judge over parenting!!
    It could have been for a number of reasons why the dad was like that..maybe he only spends a couple of days a week with children or maybe himself and the lady are separated and that's his access day supervised.


  • Site Banned Posts: 1,489 ✭✭✭Ralf and Florian


    If i was in such a situation i would, time and a place for everything, restaurants are for eating not to be putting up with daddy and his fair city like acting.


    Someone talking sense for once.Yes your right I should have said something in hindsight.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,531 ✭✭✭Little Acorn


    So many posters here have missed the point that I wonder why I bothered.I don't think its a particulerly healthy thing for a kid to completly the center of attention all of the time.Kids might want to do their own thing and scribble in a colouring book or play with their toys and not feel smothered with attention from their parents who can't stop talking about them or indulging them for five minuites.

    I agree with that but I just don't think that your story proves that was the case here. It might have been for reasons like another poster suggested that the father works long hours and didn't get to spend much other quality time with the kid or else was trying to encourage the child to eat/speak.

    It might have been nothing of the sort and maybe he just views meal time as a close bonding time and enjoys doting on his kid, but that doesn't mean that the same child is constantly smothered with attention at home or is an example of a child that is going to become spoilt.

    You only saw them for a lunch period so it is impossible to judge them as being the type of parents who overindulge their child on a constant basis.

    If it was the volume of his voice that was annoying you I can understand that as a valid annoyance, but still don't think it proves that particular child is overindulged and spoilt.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,792 ✭✭✭mohawk


    So many posters here have missed the point that I wonder why I bothered.I don't think its a particulerly healthy thing for a kid to completly the center of attention all of the time.Kids might want to do their own thing and scribble in a colouring book or play with their toys and not feel smothered with attention from their parents who can't stop talking about them or indulging them for five minuites.

    Many families only have the weekend to fuss over their children. During the week when you have work you don't have much quality time together as your always under time pressure.

    Any child going to creche or preschool will figure out pretty quick the world doesn't revolve around them. They get over it.

    Of course some parents go too far cooing over their children and some parents don't give their children enough affection.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,962 ✭✭✭✭dark crystal


    Maybe I should have asked them for your benefit.This is just an example.Its a fairly recent phenomenom and pretty widespread.Many parents just can't believe that not everyone shares their fascination for their kids and most of the replies here prove my point.

    Christ, parents don't give a flying fig whether anyone else shares a fascination with their kids or not. You overheard an affectionate conversation between a father and his toddler, he wasn't asking you to join in!

    If you can't hack other people talking to each other in public places, best stay at home.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,652 ✭✭✭I am pie


    Muise... wrote: »
    You're just calling the OP a liar, then?
    QUOTE]

    Don't put words in my mouth, it reflects poorly on you.

    I believe they are exaggerating for the purposes of their extremely weak argument.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 817 ✭✭✭Ann Landers


    Maybe I should have asked them for your benefit.This is just an example.Its a fairly recent phenomenom and pretty widespread.Many parents just can't believe that not everyone shares their fascination for their kids and most of the replies here prove my point.

    I don't have kids.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 1,490 ✭✭✭monflat


    I thought this thread would be about parents giving their children too many easter eggs.

    Indulgance is a word id use with food.


    Over affectionate maybe thats what the fella was doin.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,496 ✭✭✭Boombastic


    disgusting behaviour, can they not just stare in to their phones and ignore each other like everyone else?


  • Posts: 81,308 CMod ✭✭✭✭ Jennifer Delicious Hanger


    Quite right OP. Quite right. Sit them in a dark corner and throw some gruel at them.
    Spare the rod and spoil the child. Seen and not heard and so on


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6,720 ✭✭✭Sir Arthur Daley


    You overheard an affectionate conversation between a father and his toddler, he wasn't asking you to join in!

    The op said he was very loud to be fair about it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,435 ✭✭✭Stavros Murphy


    Wait till the little fecker is 16 and cheeky, see if Daddy's still coochy cooing. These "over-attentive" types tend to be early fallers in the Marathon that is bringing up kids. They wear themselves out. Benevolent neglect is better.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 731 ✭✭✭Butterface


    I think most parents are not even aware they're doing it. Even when I'm around babies I find that I start doting on them in a completely embarrassing way!

    Parents probably talk to their kids like that at home, and then slip into it when they're in public. It's also probably an attempt to keep the child calm and not too over-excited while they're out and about. If I were you, I'd just move seats..

    I'd prefer to hear the coochy-coos from a parent than their small child bellowing at the top of its lungs to be honest. It would have been worse if the child was screaming crying and they didn't try to calm the child down. I've seen so many examples of children crying in public and their parents completely zoning it out!


  • Posts: 53,068 ✭✭✭✭ [Deleted User]


    Wait till the little fecker is 16 and cheeky, see if Daddy's still coochy cooing. These "over-attentive" types tend to be early fallers in the Marathon that is bringing up kids. They wear themselves out. Benevolent neglect is better.

    Yes. Because asking "can Daddy have some" is a sure way to fail at parenting.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,355 ✭✭✭✭Heroditas


    Butterface wrote: »
    I've seen so many examples of children crying in public and their parents completely zoning it out!

    To be fair, that can be one method of dealing with tantrums when attempts at reasoning and distracting a child fail.
    The only option is to ignore them and let them cry. They stop....


    .....eventually. :(


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,087 ✭✭✭Spring Onion


    I was in a hotel recently and I saw that many kids had DVD players or tablets in front of them at breakfast and dinner to keep them quiet. They were transfixed like little robots and there was little family interaction. Made me sad (as a 70s/80s kid).


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2, Paid Member Posts: 6,428 ✭✭✭DoctorEdgeWild


    It's much worse when you're sitting beside a couple and it's all "Can Daddy have some?" Etc., then you look and realise they have no children with them.

    Then you realise they're talking to you.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,435 ✭✭✭Stavros Murphy


    Yes. Because asking "can Daddy have some" is a sure way to fail at parenting.

    Let's see how Daddys doing after 12 years is all I'm saying. I see a lot of my mates who were doting Daddies for the first two or three years, then vanished off onto the golf course/Australia and never see their kids from one end of the week to the other. I'm not saying it's bad, I'm just saying keeping an even keel for the kids entire life can be better - it doesn't have to be all or nothing, but often it is.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 10,962 ✭✭✭✭dark crystal


    I was in a hotel recently and I saw that many kids had DVD players or tablets in front of them at breakfast and dinner to keep them quiet. They were transfixed like little robots and there was little family interaction. Made me sad (as a 70s/80s kid).

    Better to zombify them than actually converse with (overindulge) them and risk upsetting the other delicate patrons.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,172 ✭✭✭FizzleSticks


    This post has been deleted.


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