Do you do things alone?

Bozo Skeleton · 23-04-2014 02:04AM

FullblownRose wrote: »

Why are women who go to the pub alone looked down upon.

I've worked in bars for years. In my experience women who go to the pub alone aren't looked down upon.
However, having to put up with comments and pests when you just want to have a quiet drink, that must be a headwrecker. I've thrown blokes out for that kind of nonsense.

Witchie · 23-04-2014 02:45AM

Have been to Paris and London on my own and really enjoyed just bumming around doing my own thing with no one to please. Considering taking a trip to the States on my own in a few months but will call in to family for a few days too.

Been to the cinema once on my own and it was grand.

Often eat out alone and would never bother me or cross my mind that it is weird.

Been to a few gigs alone too coz like someone else said my music taste is different than a lot of my mates and the few that would be into the same type are a carer and can't get away/living in England/babies or broke. Probably going to Michael Franti on my own in a few weeks coz no one bar my bessie who lives in London and my brother who is too broke have ever heard of him and enjoy him.

Flying solo seems to be story of my life even when in relationships but am the kinda person who will chat to anyone so its no biggy.

chrissb8 · 23-04-2014 02:52AM

I go cinema and eat by myself sometimes. Find it very therapeutic altogether. Infact I stay up late at night just to enjoy my own company. I guess I like to just think on things alot. Not calling myself "deep" or being pretentious or that. Just like getting in a good pensive mood and thinking on things helps me. I find generally being around people for too long suffocating. Even as a kid I would spend hours playing with toys alone or just reading comics. I had friends but I just enjoyed pottering around and doing my own thing. I'm not some sort of hermit though. I have a good circle of people I know I spend time with. Just at times you gotta breath and just talk to yourself a bit if that sounds weird?

One thing I would not do though is go out alone on a night out in Dublin. Was a thread sometime a couple of weeks on it and I just cringed. Being with people on a night out is just safer and unless you're some charismatic suave person it usually just ends up in you being a clinger. Which I would hate to end up being.

Podgers · 23-04-2014 03:14AM

a few years ago when i broke up with my girlfriend at the time for months i didn't feel like doing stuff like the cinema, walks etc on my own, i got too depressed looking at couples, now i don't give a sh1t! I actually enjoy going alone and going to the bar on your own is good if you get the opportunity to break into other groups and chatting to people you see alone.

Im currently travelling on my own, planning to spend 2 years in Canada and the new Zealand, 5 people in the house i am the only singleton and quite content

Strada · 23-04-2014 03:19AM

Been married over 25 years and not a happy one now so I want to cut loose. It will be strange going to things alone but I need to see the other side and meet new people. Perhaps I'm mad but I need to experience

stannis · 23-04-2014 03:40AM

Funny how people who do things alone are often regarded as strange or in some way defective. If you think about it, a person who always has to go out with others must have some flaw in their personality. I live in China now and most of the locals are like that, they can't do anything by themselves and most of them are even afraid to have their own opinions, they just regurgitate what their friends or parents say. I have good friends and I like going out with them from time to time, but I think overly "sociable"/needy people have no backbone. I respect people who don't need others to validate their presence in a restaurant or cinema or wherever.

One thing has changed since moving to China though - I wouldn't go to the cinema alone any more. For some reason it feels uncomfortable now. There is something to be said for sharing a cinematic experience with others, especially pretty ladies...

Have been to Paris and London on my own and really enjoyed just bumming around doing my own thing with no one to please. Considering taking a trip to the States on my own in a few months but will call in to family for a few days too.

Travelling alone is great fun. You can see everything at your own pace and you only have your own complaints to hear, instead of other people's. Having said that (and contradicting a little what I said above), if you actually go to live in Paris (I did for a year) you'll soon find that you need to make at least a few friends. Solitude is fine for a while, but even the most independent person can't be alone all the time, you'd go mad.

Paulownia · 23-04-2014 03:48AM

I enjoy doing things on my own, you can choose what you want to do and when to do it. Also I find that if you are alone people will talk to you whereas if you are with someone else people are less inclined to interrupt. I'm not a great fan of going to restaurants alone though.

Ahhhhh its grand · 23-04-2014 04:06AM

Had a couple weeks holidays at the end of January and some friends were heading off to Hong Kong. Have been there twice and not that fond of the place so I said fcuk it and went to Thailand on my own for a week. Had a great time, met dozens of people. Would recommend it as a place to go if you are thinking of heading off somewhere on your own.

I can generally do most things on my own...dinner, cinema. Pub is a different story though. I don't know why, it just doesn't appeal to me at all.

Paulownia · 23-04-2014 04:10AM

Ahhhhh its grand wrote: »

Had a couple weeks holidays at the end of January and some friends were heading off to Hong Kong. Have been there twice and not that fond of the place so I said fcuk it and went to Thailand on my own for a week. Had a great time, met dozens of people. Would recommend it as a place to go if you are thinking of heading off somewhere on your own.

I can generally do most things on my own...dinner, cinema. Pub is a different story though. I don't know why, it just doesn't appeal to me at all.

Did you go to any of those naturist beaches when you were there, definitely somewhere for a solitary visit?

Rory Gallagher · 23-04-2014 05:29AM

I honestly prefer being by myself most the time.
It unnerves me though when someone asks me why was I by myself the other day, Like its any of yer business and for your information its so I do not have to waste my time around people like you.

Adamantium · 23-04-2014 05:30AM

This thread screams:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VAagXsxX6I

Every other night, I'm not out alone.

Paulownia · 23-04-2014 05:31AM

I wonder about people who do not like being alone. Are they afraid of their own company?

Rory Gallagher · 23-04-2014 05:36AM

We should have a loners club.

With music like this.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaKskB43I_M

Ahhhhh its grand · 23-04-2014 07:15AM

Paulownia wrote: »

Did you go to any of those naturist beaches when you were there, definitely somewhere for a solitary visit?

Not really a fan of walking around with my flute hanging out :pac: Each to their own though I suppose.

stefan idiot jones · 23-04-2014 07:38AM

I prefer to go snorkelling on my own, my daughter has been with me a couple of times but I end up with one eye on her and the other on nasties that could hurt her so I dont enjoy it as much.

I go to some gigs on my own as I wouldn't inflict High On Fire etc. on my loved ones.

I have no problem at all eating alone, just me, my kindle and a ring stinging curry to battle.

I spent three weeks in California on my own and loved it. I love sightseeing, but you do tend to rush through things as you have no one else there to share them with. Took the new OH and baby back two years later I was that impressed.

It is nice to share some things with others but please shut the fcuk up, I'm trying to watch the rugby.

Belle E. Flops · 23-04-2014 07:50AM

My friends and parents find it very strange that I do things alone, especially going on some holidays alone.
Even if I go away for a week with friends, when I decide to head off for a weekend myself I'm told 'it's very odd and shur wouldn't you be lonely out? It's nice to have someone with you and you'd be a lot safer.'
I've found though that when I'm alone people approach me more often for a chat and people tend to go out of their way to help you.
My first solo trip was to Paris and I remember waiters/waitresses being so nice and friendly to me , asking how my trip was going etc. and when going on tours people would start chatting away which doesn't happen as much when you're away with a group.
I love being alone at times and having time to think or not think, and just not having to talk to anyone if I don't want to. Sometimes when with my group of friends I just listen to the conversation and realise what inane prattle it can be, so it's nice to escape from that every once in a while.

Graces7 · 23-04-2014 08:24AM

Paulownia wrote: »

I wonder about people who do not like being alone. Are they afraid of their own company?

my experienced thoughts exactly.

if you cannot stand your own company yet inflict yourself on others

i spend most of my time alone; just out for market trading and shopping and enjoy the contact all the more then.

things are crazy this week; two visits to a and e as the wrist is not healing; one of the k wires slipped internally.... back off to hospital today and may need more surgery and to stay in, and market yesterday and last sunday.
just too much
looking forward to a few quiet days soon..

learning to be alone enriches other relationships. takes time to learn of course.

strobe · 23-04-2014 08:39AM

I've always done the things people mention here alone, yeah. Cinema, restaurant, pub etc. Have also done them with other people as well of course but never a problem doing them alone. Feel quite lucky in that regard when a thread like this comes up. I'd feel quite restricted if I
was uncomfortable or felt awkward doing certain things without someone else with me.

Tends not to be a planned thing usually. Feeling hungry, don't feel like cooking, so I'd drop into a restaurant I like for something nice. I enjoy the whole conversation and sharing of the experience when having a meal out with someone, but I don't require it. I also sometimes just enjoy the delicious food and nice service.

I really like heading out to the pub with others, chatting away, catching up, having the craic. But I also sometimes just enjoy dropping in on my own, sittimg back in a comfortable seat, tasting a nice beer or two I haven't had before, and reading a good book or just internetting around on the phone, catching up on the news or looking up something I've been meaning to find a little more about on Wikipedia or whatever.

Cinema with someone else can be fun. Share the movie kinda thing, talk about it afterwards if its worth talking about. But I'm not always going to wait around til someone else wants to see the same thing (if anyone does at all) when I can just pop in myself some rainy evening.

These things are a few of lifes little pleasures and I genuinely feel a little blessed I don't feel prohibited from doing them without someone along for the ride when a thread like this comes along.

Graces7 · 23-04-2014 09:03AM

Lyaiera wrote: »

I'm really considering heading off on a camping holiday on my own. Head off down West Cork and Kerry with my bike and a tent. I'd be worried I'd have too much time alone with myself though, no-one about, no internet, no nathin'. And I'd be stuck on my own for a few days depending on how far I went.

go for it...my home territory..you will surprise yourself and we do have internet cafes etc...rare there is no one about either in these months.

Graces7 · 23-04-2014 09:06AM

Belle E. Flops wrote: »

My friends and parents find it very strange that I do things alone, especially going on some holidays alone.
Even if I go away for a week with friends, when I decide to head off for a weekend myself I'm told 'it's very odd and shur wouldn't you be lonely out? It's nice to have someone with you and you'd be a lot safer.'
I've found though that when I'm alone people approach me more often for a chat and people tend to go out of their way to help you.
My first solo trip was to Paris and I remember waiters/waitresses being so nice and friendly to me , asking how my trip was going etc. and when going on tours people would start chatting away which doesn't happen as much when you're away with a group.
I love being alone at times and having time to think or not think, and just not having to talk to anyone if I don't want to. Sometimes when with my group of friends I just listen to the conversation and realise what inane prattle it can be, so it's nice to escape from that every once in a while.

used to get that a lot too and still do...but you are right in all you say.

you only get really lonely when in a crowd, i have found...nothing sadder than someone alone in a crowded place, looking alone.

cena · 23-04-2014 09:07AM

I go the cinema on my Own a lot. I prefer it that way. I like my Own company at times.
I don't have to worry if the is any body odor coming off me, even if I have had a shower before hand

dark crystal · 23-04-2014 09:50AM

Will go against the grain here and say, no, I wouldn't travel, go to a restaurant, cinema or pub on my own. I just prefer company when doing those things. I'd just feel really awkward and a little uncomfortable alone.

That's not to say I don't like my own company, I do. My partner and youngest son are away for five days next week and I've farmed my daugters out to their dad for a few days just to have a few blissful, quiet days to myself. Oh, the thoughts of long baths, watching old films, listening to music with a bottle of wine to myself and great long lie ins...I can't wait! Not one human will pass through my door during those treasured few days!

gugleguy · 23-04-2014 10:03AM

Yeah, I do things on my tod. For Example, fly my quadcopter on my own repair my quadcopter successfully after a spinner comes off, play my Nintendo 3DS as well as PC games alone. Whatya lookin' a'?

23-04-2014 10:19AM

I was going to say I don't eat dinner out alone but I have a few times when meeting friends later after work and they're eating at home and I don't want to/have no time to go out and back in. Or going to NCH myself
That's grand and nobody cares. Same when travelling, read kindle or browse on some wifi

czechlin · 23-04-2014 10:25AM

I am quite good with people and have a large social circle but I need my space, so yes I do things alone and I enjoy it.

I love popping into the cinema whenever I feel like it. I don't mind going there with a friend, date or a small group but there are some movies I pick ahead to go on my own. Be it Monday afternoon, busy Friday night or Saturday morning I couldn't care less. I like spending time in the house on my own and I think I almost prefer going to galleries and museums by myself unless I'm going with someone, who's interested in the same thing. I hate it when people try to rush me in those places. I haven't been to a theatre or a gig by myself yet but I'd say that time will come. If I need to get out of the house I go to a park or a cafe to read (has to be quiet one though), I don't really go to restaurants on my own unless I travel or it's just for lunch and wouldn't go on a night out by myself as I don't see the point. I haven't been on a holiday on my own yet and really hope I'll do it some time soon. But I travel by myself a lot because I usually go to visit someone and those journeys are one of my favourite. Wouldn't go on a holiday with a large group of people though, that just sounds like hell to me.

Fox_In_Socks · 23-04-2014 11:45AM

I'd do most things alone. I go on holidays, cinema, the odd band that I want to see.

I'm used to it now. I wouldn't go out alone in Ireland as I think it's a asocial thing. I don't eat in resteraunts again, as it's a social thing and my friends would be just drinking buddies.

Legs.Eleven · 23-04-2014 11:51AM

I do a lot of stuff alone. I've travelled, gone on holidays, gone to the cinema, gone out and eaten in restaurants (but not at night in a busy restaurant) alone. There's many things I like doing alone but sometimes it's simply because no one is available to come with me. Travelling alone was perfect for me because I was more open to meeting people but I could choose to be alone if I wanted. I enjoy my own company.

Saying that, I went travelling in Italy a few years ago for a few weeks (meeting friends at the beginning for a few days) and tbh, I was lonely walking around Rome alone and really wished someone I knew was there so I could share somewhere as spectacular as Rome with them. Met people on other places but no one was in the hostel where I was staying in Rome, unfortunately. Strange experience.

Agricola · 23-04-2014 12:10PM

Legs.Eleven wrote: »

Saying that, I went travelling in Italy a few years ago for a few weeks (meeting friends at the beginning for a few days) and tbh, I was lonely walking around Rome alone and really wished someone I knew was there so I could share somewhere as spectacular as Rome with them. Met people on other places but no one was in the hostel where I was staying in Rome, unfortunately. Strange experience.

Yeah, I havent been travelling alone yet, although it came close a couple of times. I'd get pretty wrapped up in the sites, musuems, etc so I think I could handle it pretty well but I know that when evening comes, sitting in a restaurant in a place like Rome, by yourself, and looking at all the happy people at other tables would be a little depressing.
The thing that makes travel is sharing it with someone else anyway. I doubt it could ever be the same without that.

roro1990 · 23-04-2014 12:23PM

I'm 23 so i'm at the age where people of my own age are more likely to immaturely judge me for doing things alone but it doesn't bother me much. Went to SE Asia alone last year and loved it. Planning another solo trip to Thailand for October this year. The great thing about it is if you strike up a conversation with someone while travelling alone, more often than not you'll spend the day/evening with them going for a beer.

The experience is different in Ireland where someone alone is generally seen as weird, especially someone my age. Don't understand it really.

Legs.Eleven · 23-04-2014 12:23PM

Agricola wrote: »

Yeah, I havent been travelling alone yet, although it came close a couple of times. I'd get pretty wrapped up in the sites, musuems, etc so I think I could handle it pretty well but I know that when evening comes, sitting in a restaurant in a place like Rome, by yourself, and looking at all the happy people at other tables would be a little depressing.
The thing that makes travel is sharing it with someone else anyway. I doubt it could ever be the same without that.

I was wandering around the Forum and the Colosseum alone and really wanted to turn around to someone and say, "THIS IS BLOODY INCREDIBLE!!!" but couldn't. As well as that, one of my sandals broke, so I had to walk around the Forum alone with one shoe, which made it even more strange (but hilarious in hindsight).

I managed to meet some people through Couch Surfers to hang out with in the evening, so that was grand. Hostels are great places to meet people and I always check there's a bar in it first before booking. Europe is not as good as other continents for meeting people though, particularly when you're in your 30s as travellers tend to be young and in groups and not so open to hanging out with strangers (ime anyway).

Do you do things alone?

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