Interview Diasters

gramar · 04-02-2014 05:01PM

I had to spell disaster once in an interview and got it arseways!

Tombo2001 · 04-02-2014 05:02PM

Specialun wrote: »

of course there allowed ask questions..but not to be so rude.. i dont think " Why are you asking me questions" is very polite

thats fair enough, you are absolutely spot on, I wouldnt disagree with that in any way.........

.....so do i get the job.....?:D

krudler · 04-02-2014 05:06PM

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

BTW, it's just as possible to be an awful interviewer as an awful interviewee. I'm not going to blame all my poor interviews on bad interviewers, but all my good interviews were in front of sound people who made me feel relaxed and didn't ask retarded questions

"What's your biggest weakness" ughhh such a lazy question.

Shenshen · 04-02-2014 05:07PM

I don't really have any disasters, but lived through my worst interview ever just before christmas.

I had been dieing of the cold and flu the whole week, but since we're short-staffed was still working. I had the interview arranged for Thursday evening after work.
I was absolutely wrecked - tired, feverish, coughing and sneezing, sore throat and almost unable to speak at all.
I apologised for it, and was shoving one Strepsil after the other into my mouth during the interview. I had thankfully thought to bring some hand sanitiser, so when I was shaking hands with the interviewer afterwards I wouldn't just hand him my germs...

I left feeling utterly miserable, thinking of everything I had wanted to say but simply hadn't physically been able to.

Oh, and I'll be starting in that job next week.

--Kaiser-- · 04-02-2014 05:09PM

krudler wrote: »

"What's your biggest weakness" ughhh such a lazy question.

I'm too honest.

...I don't think that's a weakness...

I don't give a **** what you think.

o1s1n · 04-02-2014 05:10PM

tigger123 wrote: »

Dunno if I'd agree with that, I've always asked questions as an interviewee, it shows you're interested in the company and you find out more about the role.

I interview people a lot and if there's one thing I can tell you, it's to have some really good questions ready. Folks seem to think it's a one way thing, it's not at all.

At the end of every interview I ask the person if they have any questions for us. Some folks have thrown great questions my way which have really made me think, it leaves a lasting impression and shows interest.

racso1975 · 04-02-2014 05:12PM

The 3 that stick out are:

1) So could you tell me how you prepared for this interview today? Proceeded to get the time the got up at, breakfast journey here etc etc

2) The cleaner came in the night before interviews and turned on the heating....during summer....in a room with no windows

3) The interview chair had arms and the guy who arrived for interview was too big to fit in the chair. Embarrassing for all concerned and a great learning curve

jimgoose · 04-02-2014 05:12PM

--Kaiser-- wrote: »

I'm too honest.

...I don't think that's a weakness...

I don't give a **** what you think.

"Sometimes I work too hard."

"That's not a weakness."

"It is - I stay at my desk for weeks, forgetting to eat. I actually die dead in my cubicle, disturbing my cow-workers with the foul offally stench of my decaying remains. Eventually, as the project deadline approaches, I re-animate as a hideous zombie to feast on the brains of the living, who are then left with no option but to go into middle-management, and sit in rooms like this asking idiotic fuckan questions all day."

"Well reasoned. You're hired!"

:cool:

Boom_Bap · 04-02-2014 05:15PM

I interviewed a chap recently who seemed enthusiastic, on paper looked great. But when I started asking technical questions based on his CV which he should be able to answer, or at least admit to not knowing and have an idea of what I was talking about. He simply answered that he would google it. He then pretty much reponded for the rest of the interview that he would google it. And then google some more.

Now, I admit to using google, but I dont let it take over from my brain.

razorblunt · 04-02-2014 05:15PM

Interviewed a guy before, who had the worst fitting suit and shirt I've ever seen. Was never going to go against him, just thought it looked ridiculous, like his dad was 6'3 and he himself was 5'7. Anyways interview is going ok, not great, something off putting that I won't get into here. But talk was lagging, in an effort to get a bit of chat out of him I asked the standard, "weakness" question. Starts going on about how he's a perfectionist, mentioned the word about 12 times over the next few minutes. So I finished up with "shame you didnt iron your shirt this morning", the thing looked like it was at the bottom of his basket for a fortnight.

I once got a highfive from a candidate too, that was awkward for everyone!

Kurtosis · 04-02-2014 05:17PM

krudler wrote: »

"What's your biggest weakness" ughhh such a lazy question.

I'm a pefrectionist.

Sky King · 04-02-2014 05:17PM

Had an interview for a multinational years ago... was dying of the flu but really wanted the job so i hauled my ass out of bed, and put on my suit. But I was too late getting up and so missed the bus so i had to jog to the interview in my suit.

Then it started to piss rain so i got soaked but (luckily) a mate was passing on his moped and saw me running down the road.

After he inquired if I had just broken out of a courtroom and I replied in the negative he was satisfied he wouldn't get done for assisting a fugitive and so he let me hop up on the back of his moped and he spun me out to the place where the interview was, minus wetgear or a helmet.

I arrived soaking wet, sweaty, filthy from the waist down, dying of the flu and with my hair set like ace ventura. I didn't even want the fking job after that.

Needless to say i didn't get it. So, yeah.

Stojkovic · 04-02-2014 05:22PM

Specialun wrote: »

I am doing interviews for 2 positions we have open.

to cut a long story short I had an interview earler. The guy turned up in jeans and a shirt with runners..My team lead proceeded to ask him the basic interview questions and then I stepped in to ask him few more. When i asked him the first question he replied " who are you"..i replied that they guy asking him the questions was my team lead to which he replies " Why are you asking me questions when you report to him"..I quickly informed him that I meant me as in he reports to me and I do the hiring and firing

Thus this guy hope of landing the job was fooked

So AH have you messed up in interviews before..have you interview horror stories..have you put your foot in it

Judging by your manner, spelling and grammar, I would have torn you to shreds and then walked out.

Mint Sauce · 04-02-2014 05:25PM

Surprised no one posted this yet

**NSFW**

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3HBBPOUYOc

Merkin · 04-02-2014 05:25PM

krudler wrote: »

"What's your biggest weakness" ughhh such a lazy question.

Last time an interview panel asked me that I told them "chocolate".

They offered me the job on the spot.

Ruu · 04-02-2014 05:28PM

I was sitting down waiting for the employer, he came in and introduced himself anyway. Phone rang, must have been other person who was interviewing for same job who must have had a rough night.
Phone conversation went something like "If you want the job, come in right away for the interview in the next 5 minutes. What? No, you can't stop somewhere for breakfast first!"

Hate the, where do you see yourself in fives years/with our company/in the future questions. Sometimes use 'I wouldn't mind your job' to lighten things, one lad wasn't impressed by it.

zetalambda · 04-02-2014 05:31PM

Specialun wrote: »

I am doing interviews for 2 positions we have open.

to cut a long story short I had an interview earler. The guy turned up in jeans and a shirt with runners..My team lead proceeded to ask him the basic interview questions and then I stepped in to ask him few more. When i asked him the first question he replied " who are you"..i replied that they guy asking him the questions was my team lead to which he replies " Why are you asking me questions when you report to him"..I quickly informed him that I meant me as in he reports to me and I do the hiring and firing

Thus this guy hope of landing the job was fooked

So AH have you messed up in interviews before..have you interview horror stories..have you put your foot in it

Surely, this guys CV must have raised some red flags?

Although I did turn up to an interview (almost 20 years ago) in jeans myself. It was for a job in a video shop a bit before minimum wage was introduced and the hourly rate was like 2 pounds or something. The guy started bitching to me about not taking it seriously and I told him to **** off and walked out.

maguic24 · 04-02-2014 05:36PM

Specialun wrote: »

I am doing interviews for 2 positions we have open.

to cut a long story short I had an interview earler. The guy turned up in jeans and a shirt with runners..My team lead proceeded to ask him the basic interview questions and then I stepped in to ask him few more. When i asked him the first question he replied " who are you"..i replied that they guy asking him the questions was my team lead to which he replies " Why are you asking me questions when you report to him"..I quickly informed him that I meant me as in he reports to me and I do the hiring and firing

Thus this guy hope of landing the job was fooked

So AH have you messed up in interviews before..have you interview horror stories..have you put your foot in it

I totally put my foot in it. I studied politics in college as part of my degree and to be honest I don't really have any interest in it. Anyway, I was asked in my interview my view on Irish politics. I basically blurted out in my interview that I am an anti-Fine gaeler and I don't care who got into power as long as it wasn't Fine Gael. >.<

How stupid can you get? Anyway, I got the job and found out afterwards that the CEO is a stanch fine gaeler. I'm still working here. :P Haha.

Neyite · 04-02-2014 05:37PM

razorblunt wrote: »

Interviewed a guy before, who had the worst fitting suit and shirt I've ever seen. Was never going to go against him, just thought it looked ridiculous, like his dad was 6'3 and he himself was 5'7. Anyways interview is going ok, not great, something off putting that I won't get into here. But talk was lagging, in an effort to get a bit of chat out of him I asked the standard, "weakness" question. Starts going on about how he's a perfectionist, mentioned the word about 12 times over the next few minutes. So I finished up with "shame you didnt iron your shirt this morning", the thing looked like it was at the bottom of his basket for a fortnight.

I once got a highfive from a candidate too, that was awkward for everyone!

So it kinda did go against him then really.

FTA69 · 04-02-2014 05:37PM

I once went to an interview for a glass-collecting job in Cork when I was 18. Your man buzzed me up into his office and it didn't take too long to realise he was off his tits. He asked me the same question three times and seemed irritated every time I answered him. (The question was "where are you from originally?")

It was two minutes into the interview when I noticed that he actually had lines of cocaine racked out on a part of his desk.

Total farce.

Duggy747 · 04-02-2014 05:40PM

Did an interview for an IT job but I was sick as shìt going into it, head felt like a helium balloon and I was sickly pale. I didn't want to pass up the interview so I hauled myself there to do it.

Was going pretty good with some relaxed chat when the interviewer started asking me some standard techie questions like what the ports were for things like HTTP, SMTP, POP, etc. Very basic stuff for someone in IT...........

My brain just crapped out and I just stared at the interviewer with a blank stare..........I'm sure some drool came out..........where every almost every tech answer that dribbled out of my mouth was horrifically wrong or arseways.

The interviewer's friendly face quickly went and turned sour, probably thinking I was a chancer or a moron, which he was right. There was just long, awkward silences where my answers made him pull disappointed faces which made it worse and I was getting more flustered.

I knew the interview was well and truly lost, I just wanted to get the hell out of there as quickly as possible before I regressed into some sort of feral animal and started lobbing poo at him.

He just said "Ok...." at the end, signifying the end of the interview where I just let out a measly apology and shuffled out the door, never ever daring to show my face around that area ever again.

Of course, a minute after leaving the building I was able to remember all the answers so I just went home and slithered back into bed with my shame

That's the sort of memory that ruins a day.

BigBrownBear · 04-02-2014 05:41PM

I'd an interview once and the chap after asking about my good qualities then asked 'what do you think your bad qualities are'
I replied ' well I'm extremely honest'
He says ' well I think that's actually a very good quality'
I answered ' I don't give a flying **** what you think'.......................but I didnt really

emmabrighton · 04-02-2014 05:41PM

I have had so many bad interviews. They were all so cringeworthy!

My most recent one, I couldnt find my way into the building for my interview. I had wandered around the building 3 or 4 times before the boss sent the office manager out to get me. Later in the same interview my perspective employer asked me to write some pseudocode and I gave him a flat out no - ugh cringe!! Cos I didnt want to leave the interview with low self-esteem

Oh my God! I can't believe they hired me!!!!

Another time, and it requires a back story to a previous interview where when interviewing for a teaching job, one of the interviewers in the panel asked me what was my favourite Sorting Algorithm??? What? I hadn't prepared for that question.. mind you, I possibly should have considering it was a job in an IT teaching computer science. lol... I didnt get it, obviously. Anyway, thats the back story, I went for the interview for the post - panel of 3 people. HR, my direct superior and the big boss... At the end of the interview, I had had a few laughs along the way... the big boss asked me did I have any questions and I asked him... "What's your favourite Sorting Algorithm" Oh my God!!! Cue wide eyes from HR girl and the guy who would be my direct superior... the cheek of the interviewee... The big boss answered, thank god, and then asked what was mine??? hehe...

I was a legend when I started working there a month later :cool:

saintsaltynuts · 04-02-2014 05:41PM

Told an Employer I was computer illiterate during an interview once.Still cringe.Scumbag Brain.

krudler · 04-02-2014 05:42PM

The worst interview I ever did was for Bioware, it was a webcam interview, which wouldn't have been the worst, except...there was nobody on the other side. It was automated questions that you had to answer, on your own, talking to your laptop, it was horrendous. Not the questions they were grand, just the setting, phone interviews I can do no prob as I'm well used to talking but into a camera, (which you can see yourself on) christ..

mathie · 04-02-2014 05:45PM

I had a humdinger back in the day.
Somehow after a few years experience I thought it prudent to go for a Project Manager role.
I didn't have a rashers or have the experience.

One of the questions in the interview was to organise a list of printed out words into order of importance.
I put "Communication" at the bottom of the list.

"Why did you put 'Communication' at the bottom of the list?" they asked
"The place I work ... well nobody talks to each other and we still get our work done"

Clueless.

04-02-2014 05:47PM

Merkin wrote: »

Last time an interview panel asked me that I told them "chocolate".

They offered me the job on the spot.

I'm stealing that line! :-P

--Kaiser-- · 04-02-2014 05:49PM

krudler wrote: »

The worst interview I ever did was for Bioware, it was a webcam interview, which wouldn't have been the worst, except...there was nobody on the other side. It was automated questions that you had to answer, on your own, talking to your laptop, it was horrendous. Not the questions they were grand, just the setting, phone interviews I can do no prob as I'm well used to talking but into a camera, (which you can see yourself on) christ..

That reminds me, I did a phone interview with someone in the states. The connection wasn't great but the biggest problem was the guy spoke soooo sloooooowly that I could barely get what he was saying because I had already zoned out by the time he had finished the sentence. If I didn't know better I would assume he was mentally retarded

--Kaiser-- · 04-02-2014 05:51PM

Merkin wrote: »

Last time an interview panel asked me that I told them "chocolate".

They offered me the job on the spot.

That's genius.

My sister said her go to answer was "Well, I have an awful tendency to sleep with my bosses....". She was joking. I think

dreamers75 · 04-02-2014 05:51PM

Me" hi how are you today"
Him " grand, would you pay me cash in hand cos i dont want to lose the dole"
Me" nope"
..............
Me " thanks for coming in today".

Interview Diasters

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